#adios

“Now, it’s been a long time since we’ve had this conversation,” Blaine started, digging through the large paper bag, nose wrinkling at the delicious—but powerful!— smell wafting from its contents. “But… I feel like we’re both mature enough at this point to try it again.” A small smirk played on his features, betraying his serious tone, as he kept his head down, searching for two items in particular. 

Soon enough, he found them, turning to face his Nate with a packet of duck sauce in one hand and an egg roll in the other. The egg roll pointed in Nate’s direction was almost accusatory in nature, Blaine’s tone teasing. “Since becoming my husband, have your opinions on Chinese food sauces and how to use them changed at all or are they still terrible?” 

Nate set their plates on the coffee table, shaking his head. “Blaine Michael,” he spoke warmly. “You do realize by saying that I have terrible taste, you’re basically talking shit about yourself.” He plucked the egg roll from Blaine’s hand and dropped it onto his paper plate. Sam and Everett had gifted them actual china one year for Christmas, but they never used it. “I’d rather die--” he licked the grease off his thumb “--than put duck sauce on my egg roll. It needs sodium. Soy sauce and egg rolls are perfect together,” Nate insisted. “Duck sauce is for ducks. End of." 

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want you to. What’s the saying? ‘Ask and you shall receive?’” Drew bit his lip, shifting so she could straddle his legs. “So, how about…you give first and maybe, if you do a good job, you get to receive. That’s what I want.”

What a dork. She shook her head, pressing another kiss to his lips. “I was only kidding. But. I’m not turning down a shopping trip.” Their shopping trips were hands down the best shopping trips, especially when more went down than just shopping. “Do you plan on ‘giving’ today though, Mr. Gift-That-Keeps-On-Giving?”

She pinched his side, rolling her eyes affectionately. “I’m not required to give you an early gift, you know. It’s not shitty.” Recognizing the pattern he stroked into her thigh, she smiles at the possessiveness of the action. His name on her skin. “Awh, baby boy. Life is so hard for you.” Drew presses a kiss to his lips before leaning back quickly, face scrunched up in adorable indignation. “Hold on, did you get me an early gift?”

“I might have.” Drew twirls before settling in Ali’s lap, her legs thrown over his, wiggling until she was comfortable. “Not sure if you deserve it yet. You haven’t been paying much attention to me.” It wasn’t sure in the slightest, but if you asked her, less than 99% of Ali’s attention was way too little, and pretty much unacceptable.

He followed her unwittingly, drifting after her like he couldn’t help himself, like she had some kind of pull on him (she did, she did), like they were tethered to each other (they were). Pale hands reached out to touch, to hold and comfort like they used to, but once again fell short, hovering, like they were nervous, before falling to his sides, like they were disappointed. They reached for each other instead, fingers twisting. He didn’t know what to do with them, felt stupid fidgeting, and let them fall to his sides again. “I’m sorry.” He cleared his throat. “I really fucked up.” Understatement of the year, Wesley. But what else could he say? She was right, after all. There wasn’t anything else left. “I really fucked up. B- Tifa. I’m sorry.” He repeated, finally getting the courage to reach out, fingertips brushing against her shoulder tentatively. He wasn’t good at this, would never be good at this. Apologizing was never his strong suit. What came after ‘sorry’ when it was all you could offer and still not enough?

“Hmmm,” Blaine tapped his chin in mock concentration, head tilted cutely. “I think…” He mimicked Nate’s position, hands reaching down to grab at Nate’s ass with a smirk as he grinded their bodies together. “I think I wanna fuck you. Right out here in my woods. How’s that sound to you?”

Victory. He smiled into the kiss. He was a hypocrite, he knew. You’re not playing fair, as if what he just did—was doing—was fair in the least bit. But it was worth it. All that mattered was them right here and now, his hands on Ali’s skin, his name on Ali’s lips like a prayer, pulling his attention away from her. “I love that,” Jesse admitted, pulling away just enough to speak. “When you say my name like you can’t help yourself.” He moved to lift Ali’s arms above his head, hands wrapped around his wrists, pressing them into the pillows. 

He itched to say something stupid, always wanted to say something stupid when things got like this. He wanted to keep the tone light. It can be, he wanted to reply, this is a classy ass bong. The words were there on the tip of his tongue but then her tone shifted, turned sour. So he swallowed them and said nothing, let them sit heavy like the guilt that washed over him with every word she spoke. It wasn’t like Tifa said anything he didn’t already know. But the words made him uneasy, fell too heavily, rang too true. She needs you. I don’t. Wes wanted to bolt, leave just like she wanted him to. His leg bounced, anxious, jittery, as her voice broke just slightly. He pretended not to notice, let her have that at least. She took his hand but still he didn’t budge. But he didn’t let her go either. “So what, I can only see you if I’m coming to see her? And then what? You gonna ignore me? Act like I’m not there, not gonna talk to me or anything?” Whiskey eyes flickered over her face before dropping, once again focused intently elsewhere, their hands, the table and back to their hands. “We can’t talk anymore? Huh? You don’t wanna talk to me?”

Tifa stumbled mid-step when he didn’t budge, knee hitting against his thigh in stuttered surprise. “Wes,” she pouted. Their hands stayed locked, nimble fingers resting perfectly together, as they always did. She tugged again unsuccessfully. “We don’t need to talk. I...” Tifa bit at her lip. “It’s easier if we don’t.” His touch was eroding at her resolve, her defenses. God, not again. Tifa yanked her hand away, leaving her back to him and fighting back blurred vision. She didn’t want to miss him. Wes had hurt her. Why did she still sleep in his shirts? He didn’t deserve to be talked to. Why did she keep the pictures of him on her phone? Tifa was tired of crying herself to sleep and pretending everything was fine. She didn’t need him. She didn’t-- The softness of his questions had swept over her skin like a fever dream and she rubbed at her arms, erasing the goosebumps  from his gentle smoker’s rasp. “There’s nothing left to say, Wes.” 

“Mmhm.” Blaine hummed, raked his nails over Nate’s skin. “My woods.” Blaine licked at Nate’s lips, pressing their hips together, closer still. He wasn’t cold but he wanted more, always more. They were never close enough. He was never satisfied until they were wrapped up in each other, wound so tightly that he couldn’t tell where one started and the other ended. He giggled, cheeks hot. Still even now, after all these years, Nate made him blush. “I want to, then,” he whispered, leaning up to nip at Nate’s jaw. “I wanna fuck out here.”

“You don’t shut up period,” Jesse teased. “And you’re not playing fair. I don’t want to talk about Drew.” He shook his head, resolutely. “Can’t make me.” Jesse flipped them, bracketing Ali in with his body, locking him in like a prison. If he could, he’d keep him there forever, hide him away so he didn’t have to share. Their lips met again, Jesse deepening the kiss as a way to distract, wide palms sliding up Ali’s sides.

“You used to say they were cute.” His hand reached out to grab hers on instinct, desperately wanting to stop its retreat, but hesitating, hovering just for a second before returning to rest on the table in front of him. “Its yours. It’s weird to re-gift bongs anyway. I mean, would you take a used bong?” He chuckled nervously. “I mean, I know you clean them but. Bongs are personal. Anyway, I uh. I bought it for you. So. Keep it. Put flowers in it, I dunno.” Wes shrugged again, staring ahead at nothing, brows knitted together in a frown. He didn’t move to get up, stubbornly staying planted in the chair. “I’m serious, you know. About the whole ‘be there’ thing. How the fuck does that even work? I need to leave but I need to be here. ‘Fuck does that even mean.”

With Nate’s glasses off temporarily, Blaine took the opportunity to nuzzle into him, brushing their noses together as he pressed their bodies even closer. “My woods,” he murmured, grinning up into Nate’s face. “I can be naked if I want.” His tone was mischievous, bare arms wrapping around Nate’s torso, cold hands slipping under his light jacket.

Oh, he was well aware of that fact. Too aware that she still existed, she was still around (always around) regardless of who Ali was with. He couldn’t help but wonder if the rule applied to him as well. Did he still exist then? When Drew and Ali were wrapped around each other? “You could.” Jesse sighed, falling back onto the bed. “But you won’t.” He gave Ali a rueful smile, always ready to lessen the blow of his words with him, protect his feelings at all costs. Jesse reached out, laced their fingers. “People ramble, gorgeous. Doesn’t always mean anything.” Except for when it does.