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@cursedskull-666

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Hey while you're loving elephants: Denver Zoo has two teenage boy elephants and one Old Man Elephant named Groucho, and lately they've had the lads housed with him so he can teach them Proper Elephant Manners like how bulls raise teenage boy elephants in the wild. Bull elephants are apparently very into being parents but due to the matriarichal nature of most herds, they really only get to raise calves after they've hit puberty. My point is, one of the boys was being annoying and chasing rabbits so Groucho came up and jabbed him in the ass with a tusk, the lad ran around the enclosure crying then came back and did a lot of "I'm sorry I'll be good now dad" fawning and it was adorable.
OH MAN SEE SEE SEE i wish we knew so much more about how bull elephants interact with herds and families - we've documented bull elephants traveling to matriarchal herds and fake wrestling with male calves, and we've documented bulls protecting orphaned calves, but in god's name i want every in and out about it. everything we know about elephant social interaction is not enough. it's a Thing that introducing old bulls to a population lowers the amount of younger bulls in musth, also known as the state in which bull elephants desire nothing but murder and possibly sex, but - i want to know the precise mechanisms. old bull elephants teaching younger bulls manners renders me VERKLEMPT. i just wanna know every secret elephants have.
this is incredible though. peak teenage boy. groucho has his hands full and i fucking love him for that. get their asses, groucho.
So from what I understand, as remembered from nature programs and the zookeeper lecture, is that Old Bulls reduce the violence i young bulls by putting them through Elephant Finishing School.
This is better documented in African Elephants than asian ones because they're easier for elephant biologists to observe by the means of 'sitting on top of a jeep and taking notes' but the general scope goes like this:
Elephant herds are largely matriarichal as both a means of protection- elephants have a long childhood and it's easier to protect calves in a group, AND as a socio-political means of sexual choice.
An African elephant is pregnant for nearly two years, then she spends at least 3-5 years with that calf completely dependent on her, so she only gets a few opportunities to have babies before she hits menopause, and it's a lot of damn work so she is naturally EXTREMELY picky about who she mates with. And if she's younger, her mom, sisters and grandmothers will also be real picky about who she mates with and WHEN too- can't go around risking a teenage pregnancy, especially not with asubstandard male. Elephants also have a pretty clear idea of what they want out of a Male too: they have a marked preference for Large, Old, Socially Adept Males. Large males are HEALTHY males with all thier bones in place and functioning digestive tracts. OLD males are healthy, have good intelligence to stay alive, and have good teeth. Socally Adept Males can make friends, get along with her whole family, won't engage in dangerous behaviors like trying to kill her calves or grandmothers. It's a good system that produces robust, intelligent and helpful calves.
This means however, that most female elephants are into Dilfs, or even Gilfs. Which is extremely frustrating when you are a horny teenage boy elephant, so they go a bit nuts with hormones and social isolation and get involved in teenage elephant gangs and do things like murder rhinos out of sexual and social frustration.
BUT! If there are Large, Old, Socially Adept males about, they like being parents too, but are largely pushed out of the role by the matriarichal herds and their strict group politics that exist to prevent unsuitable mating. So They turn thier attention to these violent orphans and like your beloved Batman go "I'm gonna parent the shit outta that."
They mostly do this by herding the Lads around, pointedly demonstrating Behaviors like "How to dig for roots so you don't starve" or "How to knock over a tree" or "Greeting a Matriach Properly so she doesn't sic her descendants on you", and disciplinary behaviors like "Jabbing naughty Lads in the ass with a tusk" and "Hitting you in the face with a branch until you STOP THAT" . This is WILDLY beneficial for the young males under thier tutelage, who are less likely to die of accidents, and start mating earlier because they've had a Suitable Gentleman make introductions for them, like they are fancy men at a regency-era ball being intoduced to the debutantes.
Imagine some Fine and Respectable DILF wandering around adopting teenage delinquents and spraying them in the face with a windex bottle full of vinegar until they learn how to be proper upstanding gentlemen and you're getting close.
every day i walk into work and my manager says “here is the rule you must enforce” and i go “got it bossman” and i spend a couple days enforcing the rule and then my manager comes up to me and says “why are you enforcing the rule? we changed the rule yesterday and didn’t tell you” and i go “ok bossman new rule it is” and then a customer comes in asking to break the new rule and i say “sorry you can’t it’s the rule” and they say “but you don’t understand the rule doesn’t apply to me” and then my manager comes out and says “they’re right the rule doesn’t apply to them” and i ask why and my manager says “it just doesn’t.” and then the next day we get rid of the rule entirely and no one remembered it existed in the first place.
anyway this sounds like a metaphor for neurodivergence or something but it’s not this is just my fucking life
Don't be so pissed, Mr. Dekarios.

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magic missile never misses 😗
Baldur’s Gate 3 experience is going fine i guess
cooking a zuccini in an oven right now and i was sitting here lazily reading a post when i heard a loud noise from the oven and as a genuine reaction and for no one at all bc i'm here alone i lept to my feet and exclaimed "What this?! What's befallen my zuccini??"
Thanks Gale

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I love when people try to gotcha me on my stance that all sports should be gender integrated with "even American football???" because I can instantly come back with "oh lmao, no, I don't think ANYONE should play American football at all, it's way too dangerous" like nice try but I know no amount of testosterone is going to protect you from the profound, life ruining health issues caused by getting repeated severe concussions over the course of several years. No one should play this sport.
Like do you really think muscle mass or gender/sex can protect you from CTE?? You think men are naturally more resistant to concussions?? Because idk how else you square this sport being too dangerous for cis women and people afab but perfectly safe for cis men and people amab. Having a testosterone dominant endocrine system isn't gonna do shit in the face of traumatic brain injury. Be serious. This sport should not exist.
Honestly it's pretty weird to me that people dismiss the harm football players go through as fine because they're men, especially when so many players are black men. Always remember the argument that women are weaker than men is also an argument that men are stronger than women and can withstand more injury and abuse which isn't true, and absolutely ties into eugenicist beliefs about black bodies while obscuring their suffering as not existing because they're men and football is only dangerous for women, so how could they be hurt?
Systems can exploit men too, especially non-white or otherwise marginalized men who also deserve to be defended and liberated from said system's devaluation of their humanity and mistreatment.
@lunammoon over here saying what I tried to way more eloquently, thank you o7 no one should be subjected to the Hell Spiral 3000!!!!
Child soldiers exist, war is not an adult topic.
Children die, death/murder is not an adult topic.
The Troubled Teen Industry exists, child trafficking is not an adult topic.
Children get raped, sexual assault is not an adult topic.
Children have alcoholic parents, addiction is not an adult topic.
Children get beat to the point of hospitalization at school, that level of violence is not an adult topic.
That when these things get into "kid friendly" media at all, they tend to be heavily censored is about protecting adult control over kids, not about protecting children.
"Children have alcoholic parents, addiction is not an adult topic." also children can be addicts. i was a child back when i was an addict
come with me hold my hand. listen. the age gap is sometimes part of why the ship is so good. that’s okay. god isn’t going to smite you for liking an age gap relationship between fictional characters. go now. be free from the mind prison you’ve locked yourself in
this is the funniest thing I’ve seen in weeks
GONCHAROV (1973) dir. Martin Scorsese
“It funny because for many years people thought Goncharov was the main antagonist of the film, after all, he’s the one everyone’s out to get, right? But it seems people are starting to understand that in actual fact, it is time that is the main adversary in this story. There’s never enough of it and that torments a lot of characters, especially Goncharov, because he’s fighting so desperately to find his place in a world that is so keen on keeping him ostracized.”
[template by @bitchronan]
Greatest film of all time

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Judge Garnett: Do you have an application? Karen Friedman Agnifilo: Mr. Mangione is prepared to plead guilty to the indictment at this time.
Luigi Mangione pleaded guilty to federal criminal charges tied to the fatal shooting of Brian Thompson. Follow for live updates.
Is this plea part of a strategy to get the state case dismissed?
Obviously we need to watch and see what's next, but I don't think anything about this case will ever sit right with me. The whole thing should've been tossed after the "search" and the way the police, media, and government officials prejudiced the jury pool.
I think so, yes, and hoping to avoid the death penalty, bc Trump is chomping at the bit to use it.