My Fitness Journey

All these people who need me to be here but I really don’t feel like putting up with this stuff anymore

I hope all my fellow LGBTQAP fitness bloggers enjoyed Pride Day this past weekend if you had plans! Even then, if you did not have any plans, just being proud of who you are and who love or don't love makes all the difference in the world. Never be ashamed of who you are! Conforming to the "norm" does you and all those who came before you no justice! Living life miserable and ashamed of who you are is the worst form of self induced punishment one can endure. Stop punishing yourself. You have done nothing wrong by being who you are. Love yourself. There's a reason they call it PRIDE day. Take pride in yourself and forget about the people who tend to forget that it's 2014 or that our community is nothing new. We are not a trend. We are not some mainstream fad. We are human beings who love and lose just like anyone else. So if you want to hold hands, grip them tightly and walk with your heads held high. If you want to rub noses, Eskimo kiss until you blush so hard you couldn't be warmer in a fur coat. Feel free to love. You deserve this unalienable right just like everyone else. Show a little PDA, get hitched, change your name, adopt, feel like you are finally comfortable in your skin. And if someone tells you that you cannot do what others get to do without thinking twice about it, fight for it.

It's been quite some time since my last dedication to my health. After I came back from Jamaica it's been hard to start up again but after losing a pound or two only to gain it back and lose it again and just continue on an endless cycle of emotional eating. I have decided it's time to use the next two months to get myself under 200 lbs. the last time I checked I was 218 again (blegh) and I'm afraid to see where I am today. But regardless, that means I have to lose around 9 lbs a month which is a little high but I think with kicking myself into gear I can drop some water weight and get myself 3 lbs down in a week. Personally speaking, just so you guys are updated (for those who care to keep track), I came out to my mother on May 16th, just 6 days after I told my current girlfriend how I felt about her. She makes me happy and I didn't want to have to keep our relationship from my family. I thought it would be unfair to her. Plus, I'd been stressed out over how to come out t my family and if they would even accept me so I decided to just do it. That sounds a lot less stressful than it was in the moment but trust me, I could have fainted. Moving along, relationships are a big emotional commitment so don't tell someone you love them unless you're ready to feel every emotion under the sun alongside that feeling of love. It's exhausting! But in many cases, still worth it. Anyway, I also FINALLY graduated from high school on June 24th (WHOOP WHOOP) as salutatorian which meant I had to give a speech which I believe went well. I guess it's time to change my bio to "a college freshman" lol it's so exciting to say that. I had orientation this past Thursday and Friday at which I made tons of amazing friends already. I can't wait to see them all again in August (I'm looking at you, Erik, you asshat). My schedule is just the way I want it and I'm so excited to get to spend the next 4 years of my life studying theater and political science. It's truly a blessing. As for what I hope my summer will entail...I have a short term bucket list for my girlfriend and I to complete before we must separate until winter and I need to spend time will all of my great friends because who knows when we'll be able to see each other again. I know that sounds a little pessimistic, but I wasn't able to see some of them and that was simply because we went to different high schools. Imagine what college will do to us. Aaah! Anyway, it's back to taking care of my body as well as my spirit as I adjust to who I am. 2014 is proving to be a rather exciting and memorable year already.

It's been quite some time since I updated but that does not mean I haven't been hard at work! 1) Happy Mother's Day to any mothers who may follow me and to all of my followers' mothers. Especially my own special lady on this beautiful Sunday morning! I am currently making her breakfast: French toast, eggs, and a guyanese breakfast food called bake. 2) I am currently down to 215! 19 more days till vacation, hopefully I can lose at least 4 lbs by then, maybe even 6 if I work hard enough. 3) how are you all?? How are your journeys going?