Just Kade As Hell

Need to escape, life is just the worst nightmare on repeat. Nothing seems like it should be happening, or like it should have happened. I need to escape, but there’s nowhere left to go. Trapped inside my own head, pushed up against the wall, with no turns, no options. Where is next? Overwhelming thoughts fill my brain, as everything in my life becomes dull and grey. there’s no where left to go. life has somehow left this world. It is silent. the color has vanished, the feeling is gone. there is nothing left. nowhere left to go. nothing left to find. I don’t want to be here anymore, experiencing, learning, yearning, hurting, Suffering. Robbed from experience and emotion. Most feelings pass, this one has learned to take a hold of me. use me. I’m addicted to what was. with the illusion things can still go back to how they were. with the delirium that I somehow, through all this, am ok. I worry I can’t hold on much longer. In some form or another, “I” don’t exist anymore, I’m already long gone, a memory of who I used to be. filled with regret and hatred. Can I go on. I need to escape

I Never Want to See you Again

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/medical-marijuana-2018011513085

https://www.healthline.com/health/medical-marijuana/benefits-of-marijuana