enbean @coolprofessorbagelwinner - Tumblr Blog

I think merasmus and tom jones should have nasty gay sex in soldier's back pocket

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 merasmus #team fortress 2 merasmus #tom jones tf2 #tf2 tom jones

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iamthemaestro

found this at an antique shop the other day and was immediately like oh this belongs on tumblr. sniles sneetly. fwowns fwangry.

depsidase

iamgoingtobeatyouwithhammers

Humans are weird: fibers.

We all fucking LOVE fibers. We wear them. Eat them. We use hypothetical fibers to explain the unexplainable. We make ART with them - not just the obvious crocheting or needle felting or sewing. Guitars, brushes, all these things. STRING THEORY. And all the media tropes, like the red string of fate. Humanity is obsessed with fiber.

depsidase

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theskydoesgreatthingsnow

🪩 🎶 🦀 🦀 🦀 🎶 🪩

fuckyeahmarxismleninism

Happy birthday to Lyudmila Pavlichenko (born July 12, 1916), Soviet sniper in World War II, with 309 confirmed kills.

A true role model for today.

str8aura-no-not-that-one

Shitty things about being isekaied #34; every time I use the restroom I automatically reach for my phone I left in my jacket pocket back on earth, and my hand goes exactly where I keep my knives on my belt, so I always walk out of the john with a fresh hand wound

str8aura-no-not-that-one

Shitty things about being isekaied #49: dog came with me but the magic field uplifted her into an anime girl and I'm realizing our personalities just don't click (plus her sitting on my lap is weird now)

str8aura-no-not-that-one

Shitty things about being isekaied #64: the town blacksmith is an elf named Gay Simpson and I couldnt explain why that made me laugh and now she won't fix my weapons anymore

str8aura-no-not-that-one

Shitty things about being isekaied #75: my degree in russian lit is useless now

str8aura-no-not-that-one

Shitty things about being isekaied #83: the four dark lords of this world look almost identical to abba which cant be intentional but when they line up on horseback its so uncanny i cant help but wonder if someones fucking with me

str8aura-no-not-that-one

Shitty things about being isekaied #94: they dont make my meds here and health potions dont do shit for bipolar

first-worldsaver

Yep

xenasaur

we need legislation banning games >100GB

xenasaur

OPTIMIZE YOUR SHIT BETTER THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR A 150GB GAME!!!

xenasaur

upon reviewing the notes I'm changing my position. games must be <50GB. no more mandatory 8k uncompressed textures!!! I don't believe in 8k I think it's fake

xenasaur

to be clear games really ought to be around 20 gigs or less. but I think in the spirit of generosity and mercy we won't criminally prosecute the developers until the file sizes breaks 50

creamypancakebatter

Helldivers 2 heard you and went from 156 to 23

xenasaur

wait is that real

just looked it up. holy fuck. they did it by de-duplicating assets. I'm just. my jaw is on the floor. supposedly duplicating assets helps load times on HDDs but. holy fuck at what cost

somespicycheese

it's worse than that: The Helldivers devs were told that duplicating assets would help HDD load times, but then they actually tested it and it had basically zero effect on load times!

So they had more than sextupled the size of their game by following industry standard practice that actually did basically nothing!

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owlet

you need to get it out of your mind that psychosomatic illness is just “making up symptoms” when it’s actually much more like your body is being actively poisoned by chemicals released from your brain

owlet

if you’re so stressed that you’re puking your guts up every morning, are unable to eat or keep anything down, you can’t look at light without feeling infinitely worse and feel exhausted and in pain all the time (or whatever your particular stress induced symptom set is) you’re not just feeling like that because you’ve willed it into being. your body is begging for relief from the constant barrage of stress hormones and it requires the fundamental source of stress to go away, not just distracting yourself from the symptoms

just because the root is psychological doesn’t mean the result isn’t an entirely physical process.

headspace-hotel

This and also "your body is desperately trying to alert you to the fact that stress is killing you"

katherynefromphilly

Doctor, looking at my neck x-ray: “The muscles of your neck are in such spasm right now that your spine has lost its curve. No wonder you’re in such pain. What the heck did you do to yourself?”

Me: “I work on a computer all day.”

Doctor: “Ah. That will do it. Right, so here’s a script for anti-inflammatories and a muscle relaxer. Also try hot and cold on it, 15 minutes each, and then gentle movements between each round. You’ll feel better in about a week.”

Me: “In a week I’m still going to need to work on the computer.”

Doctor: “And here’s also a script for 6 months of Physical Therapy.”

Me: “In 6 months I’m still going to need to work at a computer.”

Doctor: “And take breaks and do stretches between meetings?”

Me: “They book me in back to back meetings where I work. I eat lunch at my computer. I have to excuse myself to go pee.”

Doctor: “…”

Me: “…”

Doctor: “Um… it sounds like this job is actually, literally, killing you? Can you possibly work someplace else?” *

———

*note: It wasn’t said as flippant advice, and the doctor was 100%. right. After I got a different job — which took a WHILE — it was in a different corporate culture, one that didn’t believe in filling the day with meetings. I was able to do the stretches I was supposed to do, and also walk at lunch, and my neck is much better now. Not everyone has this choice. But maybe, if your job is killing you too, start thinking about an escape plan. Your body will eventually turn you into a pretzel otherwise. Nothing psychosomatic about that.

shining-latios

his face enchanted me so naturally I had to buy him and bring him home with me

biblically-accurate-lesbian

I have his beautiful sister..........

shining-latios

olliemnjones

tommyssupercoolblog

Because the notes are full of people arguing over which game is better

whats-a-bear

you are not going to stop me from celebrating this moment

allisonrw96

she's done!

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fecir

ode-on-a-grecian-butt

this could be us

transmechanicus

6 hour workday maximum i’m not kidding, if it can’t be done in that timeframe it doesn’t need doing.

vmprblood

this doesn't apply to jobs like childcare

transmechanicus

If i worked in childcare and my 6 hours were up i would start putting babies in ziploc bags and shipping them to Turkmenistan listed as endangered fruits and vegetables

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