You shouldn't be posting about your principal on here, no matter what he says. Not only can you get him into a lot of trouble, you can expose anon blogs that follow you from your school that don't want their accounts publicized if your principal starts snooping around.
Excuse me? If my principal is referring to his female students as âslutsâ I am perfectly justified in talking about it on my blog. Keeping quiet about inappropriate behaviour like this is exactly how it is allowed to continue. If he gets in trouble, it is well deserved.Secondly, I donât know what you mean by âanon blogsâ but people donât have to like or reblog the post if they donât want to, so I donât really see the problem here.And I canât imagine that my principal is even aware that tumblr is a website, much less that he searches the ârape cultureâ and âpatriarchyâ tags. But if he is somehow reading this, hey - I kind of think youâre scum.Â
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Things that school taught me, and, clearly, why I'm more than a lil frustrated:
1. Boys will be boys. Girls will be girls.
2. Girls that dress 'slutty' are not 'nice' girls.
3. Menstruation isn't to be talked about
  I've been looking back on my elementary and highschool experiences lately and although I had some great times...the 'lessons' that were taught along the way, they were not so great.
  I have clear memories of teachers asking girls not to wear short skirts or low tops as it was distracting, teachers saying that 'boys are boys,' and constantly being in an environment where double standards were key. I was if the magnifying glass was being held above our heads and it was starting to burn. I think about my sister, of how I'm so glad she'll be leaving that school soon. Girls and boys have been taught that a woman's body is not her own, however unaware they are that they have, in the very institutions that are supppose to propel them to success. Going back to any of my old schools just makes me sad...in primary school I see parents perpetuating misogyny to their sons, in elementary schools I see teachers reaffirming that, and in highschool I see kids that people have stopped reaching out to.
 I'm just tired of the same old bullshit being spread.
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âNaming it a feminist movement and putting the onus on women as a womenâs movement is the same attitude that weâre trying to avoid. Weâre shifting the onus that this is a womenâs problem. Itâs not a womenâs problem. Itâs everyoneâs problem and even moreso it can be a menâs problem because they need to take the responsibility to not commit violent acts. And we all need to take a look at why anyone would.â
Caitlin MacDonald in an article for the Georgia Straight on Slutwalk Vancouver
rah rah, getting men involved is awesome, whoohoo
but why is acknowledging that Slutwalk is a feminist movement a bad thing?
I understand the point is to shift responsibility to men, which is great.Â
Thatâs exactly what weâre asking for; to blame rapists, not victims*. But the fact that the organizers of Slutwalk are trying to separate the event from feminism is troublesome. Why would a march protesting rape culture be uncomfortable associating with a womenâs movement? Is the refusal to take the name an effort towards inclusion, fearing that men and women who donât identify as feminists will view the march as something other because of the demonization of feminism in the media? In that case, wouldnât we want to educate, instead of accommodate? Making feminist ideas accessible is important, but perpetuating these myths is dangerous. By removing the event from âfeminismâ weâre saying that we donât agree with feminist values, or a slightly different form of the so common, âweâre not like those girls.â That phrase has been used by women to oppress other women. These statements feel like Slutwalk just stabbed me in the back and said, âWeâre not like those movements.â This fear of feminism is what allows rape culture to exist. So, instead of saying, âitâs not a womenâs problemâ why donât we open âfeminismâ to men? Slutwalk has a very inclusive message which I love, but I think we could accomplish the same thing by inviting men to identify as feminists, rather than cutting feminism out of Slutwalk.
*I understand that not all rapists are men, and not all victims are women, Ms. MacDonaldâs point was that men need to take responsibility not to commit violent acts, and that is what I was addressing with that line.
This said, I will be attending Slutwalk this Sunday, and I am very excited to support the movement! I can sound very negative at times, but this was meant to be constructive criticism, not a tear down of the wonderful ladies who run Slutwalk. I really admire all the work they put in and the message they put out.
Sorry all you grrls for the lacks of posts recently, it has been a busy end of school year and just time-of-year in general for all of us. This shall soon change. Much love.
So I thought I'd just lay down my opinions on porn to help a girl out, ie my home girl C.S. and get this discussion flowing a bit because it's a really cool topic with a lot of different opinions floating around. That and no one wants to talk about it because - you know - taboo and all but we gon' fix that and talk about porn. porn porn porn porn porn.
Ok so first off I just want to say that porn is something that I agree with C.S. on, it's freaking confusing to know how to feel about it, and ultimately you're the one who has to come up with your own way of figuring out just how you feel about it. It can be something that is a conflict in relationships fo' sho. Straight guys love it, generally. And even though actually professionally done porn is often sexist and objectifying (don't even get me started on lesbian porn) I've found that it's a discussion that sometimes has to happen because partners get frustrated when the other is/isn't supportive of that form of porn. I've met people who consider their partner viewing porn as cheating, which is totally cool if they absolutely feel that way, but they have to be open to talking about that. Because, girl, if you shove that topic under a rug it's going to boil into this awful horny sex monster that will blow shit all over your relationship.
Personally speaking, I find amateur porn OK. Sometimes it turns me on, I'm guilty of that. Actual produced, actor porn? Turns me off. Off like a light that is attached to your house and turns off automatically in a really absurdly tiny amount of time when you really need it on because you're searching for something outside. That was a simile obvs, but a very important one. I find it just plain offensive when "Oh hey, let's watch porn to turn us on" turns into "let me scroll through these completely objectifying videos while you're sitting here and watching because we both want to be turned on right? And I don't really see you like that, you know as my sex toy, but I'm getting a boner watching this soooo hot."
Nooooooooooooooo. And I find the distinction, like C.S. has said, is hard to make. I support porn but not that kind of porn? Well that's totally cool! But how do you explain it, and how do you deal with that internal conflict?
What I like about amateur porn is that generally, usually, it's just a couple who are a couple for realz and are just recording themselves having sexy times. For example, porn4ladies  defs deserves a shoutout for being erotic and respectful. I like that, because you can really tell when a couple is a couple and, you know, actually care about each other and, you know, just are looking to make each other feel super super good and, you know, aren't being super objectifying. Oh and I do love erotic literature (but not 50 shades, puh-lease), can't forget that.
To touch on relationships again, what I find can be helpful, if you're conflicted but your boy likes porn or you like porn but don't want to watch objectifying shit, is record you and your partner! Take pictures! Write some sexy times down and read them later! There are numerous ways to both get turned on by media and not feel like you're supporting an industry that you really may not want to support. When it comes to media that involves sub/dom and bdsm, I feel unable to comment on it. This is because I don't know much about it, haven't participated in it, and know that there are a lot of stigmas/stereotypes/just innaccurate generalizations that pertain to it. Info on that? Send it over!Â
Ok, so I feel like that's a good tangent to kind of go off of and if you have a response for C.S. or myself, that would be super fabulous.Â
  I was watching an interview with Gloria Steinem. Fantastic, I know. And then the issue of pornography came up. Being sex-positive, I embrace exploring sexuality and learning about what you like but at the same time share anti-pornography views and completley understand that side of the story. I do support erotica over porn, as porn is identified as very objectifying and connected with all sorts of harassment and awful conditions for many of its workers, however, that even becomes as issue because erotica isn't a very common term for sex-positive or female-positive porn. It still simply identifies as porn. I feel like its a double standard if I say I support porn but just not yours. I am so confused on this issue and if any of you guys are as well please feel free to message us. Would love to hear from you.
Dear goodness, watching interviews with Gloria Steinem is making my day so much better after that shitty comment. I just want to be cuddled in a patchwork quilt full of Gloria Steinem pictures.
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I just watched All I Wanna Do and ohmigod I loved it
this is going on my Girl Power movie list
I'll probably write a full review later but I'm just going to make some quick points now
+Â even though the girls are 16ish they still talk about sex! and drugs! and drinking! and birth control! (because, shocker, real 16 year olds do that too!)
+ they talk a lot about expectations and how they are excited for their futures and they want careers and how they're going to strive despite societal pressures
+ they have a kickass female role model in their headmistress, who encourages them to challenge society
+ birth control gets its own point because, hot damn, I am happy with the ways they talked about it
+ they candidly spoke about bulimia and feeling of worthless, and changing yourself for guys
- class and race were completely ignored, and while I did love the movie, it's super easy to believe that rich white girls can achieve their dreams, you know?
and because the movie was made in the 90's everything is talked about more openly (dear god I love pre-2004 movies b/c of that)
anyway, check it out if you get a chance! It's on Canadian netflix (and probably American too, but I'm not positive on that)
a girl was raped and we're told to pity her attackers
it doesn't matter that they're 16/17
it doesn't matter that they're star athletes
it doesn't matter that they were drunk
these things don't change the fact that
they are rapists
and we will not let that be forgotten
Who gives a shit if the were star athletes. They are not the victims.. Does anyone care about the young girl who was drugged and raped REPEATEDLY and now is going to have to have years of counseling? No!! Fuck this stupid ass news reporters and those âStar Athletesâ I hope it tears them up inside when they sleep at night
Thereâs something about these comments that just donât seem right.
Perhaps itâs the caps lock.
Perhaps itâs the swearing and lack of sentence structure.
Or perhaps itâs the scary notion that, despite what your moral self righteousness tells you, everyone involved in this case is a human being. And theyâre all incredibly young.
I think that speaks out for a great deal more. The tragedy and the serious psychological trauma this poor young girl will endure is monstrous, I couldnât for one second attempt to understand it. But at the same time I canât help but mourn everything and everyone else alongside it.
Iâm not sure what says about me but Iâm sure someone will tell me because this is tumblr and we know everything.
Dean, I canât really speak to what it says about you that youâd mourn the potential of the people involved in the case. I donât think it says anything hugely negative, perhaps itâs even an example of empathy on a level that many people canât experience. Personally, I canât feel empathy for anyone at the party, convicted or not.
Itâs easy to see the rapistsâ age and see the rest of their lives stretched out and attach that label and see how difficult it would be, but 16/17 is not so young that they canât understand what constitutes rape. This wasnât a morally dubious case of flirting and high levels of alcohol. The girl was drugged to unconsciousness and then gang raped. It was meditated, it was debasing and it was definitely definitely rape.
For the media to focus almost EXCLUSIVELY on the futures of these two dangerous young people, who DESERVE to pay for their crime, to be labelled for what they are, in order to grow and change, is rape apology. And thatâs always unacceptable but it seems particularly insulting in such a clear case of sub-human behaviour.
People who rape other people DO NOT lead promising lives.
The tragedy here is not for the two criminals who are serving minimal time in a correctional facility. The tragedy is that their victim was seriously violated and injured, and she is receiving absolutely no support from the media.
Another thing that really bothered me: the first boy didnât apologise for the rape. He said he shouldnât have taken a picture of her lying naked on the ground after being raped. The second boy tearily pleaded âI didnât mean to do that.â What did you plan to do? I think itâs extremely obvious it wasnât consensual, so I donât think this appalling crime could have been committed more consciously.
Iâm tired of people telling me rape isnât a big issue. That itâs unlikely a girl will be raped as long as she wears enough clothing, walks in a large group, doesnât drink too much⌠it still happens. And when it does happen, the only lesson that is taken away from it is âyou should have been more careful, because now youâve ruined some peopleâs lives.â
THIS IS NOT THE SAD STORY OF TWO TEENS WHO WERE UNJUSTLY TREATED BY THE JUDICIAL SYSTEM
this is the story of two rapists who were brought to justice (with arguably small sentences) for the repeated rape of a 16 year old girl
stop treating the rapists like the victims
stop talking about their lost futures
stop talking about their grades and athletic ability
stop implying their jailing is a loss to society
rapists are not a loss to society
stop telling us it was because of the alcohol
stop telling us they didnât understand what was going on
teenage boys know what sex is and they know what consent is
they know what they did and maybe theyâre sorry they did it
(or maybe theyâre only sorry they got caught)
regardless
they committed a crime and are being punished for it
Rape does not suddenly become pardonable when the rapists have good credentials.
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You know when you feel down about the world and the patriarchy always seems to win...then a radically cool chick will come out of nowhere, sit down with you, talk for awhile, and make you feel so much better.
