just a working dog in a ruff world

Hi! Are you cis in the UK and you'd like to support trans rights? Great!

How: buy a trans flag pin and wear it in public.

Why: chaff is an overwhelming amount of false positives so that when a missile gets close to the plane, it hits the chaff and not the plane.

In practice: the goal is to make it DIFFICULT to identify trans people to target with bathroom bans, and to create many FALSE POSITIVES for businesses.

Basically, you might get accused of being trans and kicked out, because of the badge. You say: I wear the badge because trans rights matter.

You follow up with a letter to the business saying you're fucking furious because some nosy dipshit just tried to play fucking genital police with you in the loos. You know lots of trans people (don't name any, if you do) and you wear the pin in support and you're disgusted at them for allowing this.

Blame the business for allowing the behaviour.

Businesses see that their cis customers are getting bothered over a badge and may clarify trans-inclusive policies, so they can kick out the bathroom botherers instead of nice cis allies.

You only need to buy and wear the badge, and you are protecting trans people. You can be genuinely heroic. Even one cis person doing this helps, and everyone you get to join in helps even more.

Non-affiliated badge link:

https://rainbowandco.uk/collections/trans-pride/products/transgender-pride-flag-badge

Hi! Are you cis in the UK and you'd like to support trans rights? Great!

How: buy a trans flag pin and wear it in public.

Why: chaff is an overwhelming amount of false positives so that when a missile gets close to the plane, it hits the chaff and not the plane.

In practice: the goal is to make it DIFFICULT to identify trans people to target with bathroom bans, and to create many FALSE POSITIVES for businesses.

Basically, you might get accused of being trans and kicked out, because of the badge. You say: I wear the badge because trans rights matter.

You follow up with a letter to the business saying you're fucking furious because some nosy dipshit just tried to play fucking genital police with you in the loos. You know lots of trans people (don't name any, if you do) and you wear the pin in support and you're disgusted at them for allowing this.

Blame the business for allowing the behaviour.

Businesses see that their cis customers are getting bothered over a badge and may clarify trans-inclusive policies, so they can kick out the bathroom botherers instead of nice cis allies.

You only need to buy and wear the badge, and you are protecting trans people. You can be genuinely heroic. Even one cis person doing this helps, and everyone you get to join in helps even more.

Non-affiliated badge link:

https://rainbowandco.uk/collections/trans-pride/products/transgender-pride-flag-badge

It's a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.

Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.

Let's say you're a parent and your kid is having issues.

Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)

Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that's what shame does!

You can't guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!

If you want it in a simple phrase:

Guilt and shame are NOT the same emotion!

Theyre very similar, but theres a key difference. Guilt comes from an internal source and shame external.

What do I mean? Well, when you feel guilt, its because you've betrayed your own morals. Youve done something you view as bad, and you feel guilty for defying your own moral code.

Shame, however, is external and comes from our individual societies, and has nothing to do with moral codes (in the way guilt does). Shame comes from how OTHERS perceive you. You go to school, and wet yourself, you feel shame because the other kids point and laugh, they think less of you now. You may know it was an accident, and accidents happen, and thats okay! But because other people now think less of you for it, you feel bad.

worth that I learned from my

time in DBT.

can land you in another

kink entirely.

It's a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.

Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.

Let's say you're a parent and your kid is having issues.

Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)

Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that's what shame does!

You can't guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!

If you want it in a simple phrase:

Guilt and shame are NOT the same emotion!

Theyre very similar, but theres a key difference. Guilt comes from an internal source and shame external.

What do I mean? Well, when you feel guilt, its because you've betrayed your own morals. Youve done something you view as bad, and you feel guilty for defying your own moral code.

Shame, however, is external and comes from our individual societies, and has nothing to do with moral codes (in the way guilt does). Shame comes from how OTHERS perceive you. You go to school, and wet yourself, you feel shame because the other kids point and laugh, they think less of you now. You may know it was an accident, and accidents happen, and thats okay! But because other people now think less of you for it, you feel bad.

worth that I learned from my

time in DBT.

I want to work in adaptive tech, tech that would be made to help with disability stuff, like prosthetic, wheelchair, along with adapting video games to be more epileptic friendly, it's crazy how many of them lack flash warning and the ability to switch off moving images.

It's not a crazy big dream, but it's something I want to do, bring a little nicety into the world, even when I'm not the nicest person around, which is often.

I want to make adaptive tech more accessible, and I want it to feel less humiliating for the younger folk that need them and everyone who needs them in general.

I think I've been compared so much to a demon in my life, especially when I was younger, that I want to do something that'll make people think I'm good, despite not really being a big fan of the good and bad people things.

It selfish in a way, but selfishness and selfishness are two sides of the same coin if you ask me, they can create great things, just like they can create horrible things, and they're not always easy to differentiate, as people don't often realise how their actions might be feed by a selfish desire.

But honestly who cares about that, the reason between any action doesn't matter as long as it's not hurting anyone if you ask me.

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I want to work in adaptive tech, tech that would be made to help with disability stuff, like prosthetic, wheelchair, along with adapting video games to be more epileptic friendly, it's crazy how many of them lack flash warning and the ability to switch off moving images.

It's not a crazy big dream, but it's something I want to do, bring a little nicety into the world, even when I'm not the nicest person around, which is often.

I want to make adaptive tech more accessible, and I want it to feel less humiliating for the younger folk that need them and everyone who needs them in general.

I think I've been compared so much to a demon in my life, especially when I was younger, that I want to do something that'll make people think I'm good, despite not really being a big fan of the good and bad people things.

It selfish in a way, but selfishness and selfishness are two sides of the same coin if you ask me, they can create great things, just like they can create horrible things, and they're not always easy to differentiate, as people don't often realise how their actions might be feed by a selfish desire.

But honestly who cares about that, the reason between any action doesn't matter as long as it's not hurting anyone if you ask me.

--