CloudyDreamForecast

Moving in with my new partner in six weeks and just trying to get everything ready for us to move in since it’s our first time building a household together.

Work is also batshit insane right now. The restaurant gets busier and busier as the weather gets nicer and we’re still short on cooks and short on managers. I love the hell out of this job and they pay me well, but man I don’t really wanna work overtime.

I’m also trying to continue my hobbies and creative pursuits. I don’t know if my brain can really handle it. After talking to a friend and my mom, I think it’s a good idea if I find out what mental health services I have access to. Therapy and potentially medication could honestly do wonders for my life.

Patterns within patterns

Fractals within fractals

Choices made years ago

Can come full circle

And change the now

All these branching paths

Like veins in a leaf

Or the lines in the palm of your hand

Waves of chaos

Crashing onto the sand

Of daily decisions

We are all in these hyperreal

Choose your own adventure books

But the pages intersect

Between you and I and all

We try to maintain

Our inner illusion of control

Yet this idea is bullshit

We are slaves to our neurons

And genes and diet and time

It may not be your experience

But this is mine

The inspiration here is a woman

She came out of nowhere

As if from thin air from across the pass

She smiled beneath her mask

And elicits memories of mountain town cafes

Glances shared and words spoken

Why is it so hard to be content?

I always want more

Different

New

It's a moment of fear and of change

So I'm grasping on to those things

That keep me feeling present

And thats ok

Just be prudent

Be kind

Be honest