The smallest things.

Okay, the Miley Cyrus comparisons are really starting to piss me off now.

If someone needs to be injured, I'll get Alex to do that for you.

That I’m the worst at being the best?

That you're better than the majority of this Earth's inhabitants and can only get better.

I don’t want to be to be like most people, I want to be extraordinary!

Well you're clearly better than most people. I've never known anyone that was on Broadway in any way, shape, or form. So that right there tells you something.

Let me spell it out for you; my moms tried for years to have a daughter. Years. And when they finally had me, I was their miracle, their star, the light of their lives. And when they saw how talented I was, they were sure I’d be the next hit on the radio, or in my case, the next Broadway star. But I’m twenty-three and still nowhere close to my dreams. After years of putting me on a pedestal, I don’t want to be knocked down.

... Hey... If you're at least on Broadway, I'd say that's pretty damn close. You're closer than a lot of people will ever get. Turn on the light. There's always happiness. Just turn on the light.

Maybe not, but I mind. I don’t want them to see me like that

What's the worst that could happen?

No, not exactly. I love my mothers, they are my best friends. I talk to them an hour everyday. That’s not the point. The point is that my life’s in ruins; I’m still a chorus line singer with no prospects, still a part-time server at a bakery, and now currently suffering from feelings for the least appropriate person on the planet.

... If they love you, they won't mind, right? The ones that mind don't matter and the ones that matter don't mind?

My mom and mama called...

Well, you shouldn't have to anything different for your parents, right? Just be presentable, don't do anything you wouldn't normally do. That's what you're supposed to do when parents visit, right?

Can you imagine the amount of confused Halloween store workers there must have been when hundreds of teens started buying out wizard cloaks to wear in June?

Hey, I'm 23 and I still dress up in my Hogwarts attire.

I solemnly swear that we are up to no good.

Jo sure turned on the light.

I must have watched Order of the Phoenix a hundred times in the month I first moved here. I thought my partner was going to shoot me.

This is just an exciting time for Harry Potter fans.

They don’t like Harry Potter? Just close the door on them if they try to come in. “No muggles allowed” should work.

She likes Harry Potter. I just think that she's about to get sick of me blasting Ministry of Magic in the apartment all the time.

I’d probably end up face-down on the ground, anyhow.

I'm pretty sure my roommate is going to hate me before Monday rolls around.

Wouldn’t we have classes together, or Quidditch matches at the least?

Possibly. But I'm not a Quidditch player. I wish I was, but I get motion sickness. And heights aren't one of my favorite things in the world.

Ravenclaw, if I remember correctly. Yours?

Could be worse. I'm a Hufflepuff.

Very much so, and clearly lying to themselves.

Mind if I ask what your House is? Gotta make sure we can be friends.

I don’t think I want to meet anyone who wouldn’t be.

Anyone who isn't excited is wrong.