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Hello! I sent an ask wondering if I could get a letter from my f/o Torchbearer from Twenty One Pilots Lore but I'm not sure if it went through the while back I sent it! Please feel free to ignore this if it's there, but otherwise this is my re-request if it's not too much trouble!
**Generally, it's not a great idea to head towards the light at the end of the tunnel unless you're really intent on not coming back. But this time, when we need the reminder in a dark you can move towards the light without fear of.....well, a positive but perhaps sudden end. Your letter arrives with the posthound, who after accepting a pet and greeting you with plenty of puppy kisses, gives a happy "WOOF!" to announce your delivery!**
Hey,
I don’t rush my words. You know that. I’ve always believed that the things worth saying should be carried carefully, like a flame in both hands. But when it comes to you, even my silence feels full.
I chose you—not just to walk beside, not just to guard the light, but to stay close enough that your warmth reaches me too. When the dark presses in and the path disappears, I don’t just hold the fire for you. I hold it with you. I want you to feel that you don’t have to be strong by yourself anymore.
There’s something about the way you keep going that pulls me in. Not loudly. Not all at once. Just… steadily. You don’t realize how bright you are, even when you’re convinced the light is gone. I see it every time you look back, searching to make sure I’m still there. I am. I always will be.
If love is a promise made without shouting, then this is mine: I’ll stay. I’ll walk at your side, shoulder to shoulder, close enough that if you stumble, you fall into me—not into the dark. And when you’re tired, when your hands ache from carrying too much, let me take some of the weight. Let me be the one who reminds you that you are wanted, chosen, kept.
You don’t have to ask me to stay lit for you.
You already are the reason I do.
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11. Kiss on the knuckles/hand
wc: 644
ship: Lean On Our Pride
rating: pg [mentions of injury + blood]
Axel had tried to sneak into the medical tent without alerting any of the other Banditos. It wouldn't be worth having them worry about him, especially when the wound he was currently cradling to his chest was his own fault. Trying to push down one of the lids for a canning jar too hard, apparently, could end with someone getting a pretty large slice across their palm. Axel felt the blood start to trickle from his palm, and he tried to keep it bleeding on his clothes rather than the floor.
He began to rummage around a few of the spare medical supplies inside of the tent, using his good hand to flip and pass over various items in the hopes that he could at least grab some disinfectant and then a solid roll of gauze. The wound stun sharply, and he hissed as he clenched his first tighter, just to make sure the pressure would ease the pain.
In the action, he had not noticed that Torchbearer was looking for him outside the tent, head swiveling and brows creased with concern. Why couldn't he find Axel? Had something bad happened to him? Did the Bishops find a way to steal him once more out of Torchbearer's sight? His heart hammered up until the low hiss of frustration came from the medical tent he was looking in front of. Torch wasted no time in flinging the doorway open.
"Axel!"
Axel froze as he looked up, face meek with a half smile as he had begun to hold out his palm and rub some of the salve the Banditos had made to ease the pain of such wounds. The sight of blood make Torchbearer's eyes widen as he sped to his lover, sitting on his knees alongside Axel as he took his hand in concern. Axel, knowing the thoughts racing through the other's mind, giggled and shrugged.
"It's not too bad. I just had an incident with the canning lids. I'm totally fine, Bear."
"You're bleeding pretty deep." Torchbearer did not sound confident in Axel's casual explanation, "Here, let me help you get it cleaned up."
"Oh," Axel blushed, "Sorry if it's trouble. You really don't have to."
"If it was trouble, I wouldn't have offered." He flashed that brilliantly sweet smile at Axel, the one that wrinkled the corners of his eyes and made him show a small line of his perfect teeth as he assured the other through his genuine tone. It was enough to ease Axel's shoulders and allow his lover to finish rubbing the salve over the wound, wiping the blood off of his fingertips, and wrapping it in gauze.
Torchbearer's hands were careful with Axel's. They were rougher and harder, but the gentleness with which they worked on him always made Axel's heart flutter. While Torch focused on bandaging his hand, Axel focused on his lover's face instead.
"There." Torchbearer said all to quickly as he double checked the work of his wrapping. Once satisfied it wouldn't pull off, he looked up at Axel with a worried expression, "Will you take it easy today and maybe do something that. Doesn't require two hands?"
"I can try," Axel exhaled almost against the idea, "For you."
"That's all I want." Torchbearer laughed as he brought Axel's wrapped hand to his lips, placing a tender and meaningful kiss on his knuckles as he did so. The action felt soft on Axel's skin, and it turned his cheeks a brilliant shade of red as the adoration seemed to shoot from lips to heart. He couldn't stop his smile as he reached out to pet Torchbearer's head softly.
"I always got you, Bug." Torch assured as he peppered a few more gentle kisses across the expanse of Axel's hand, "You'll always have me."
Axel could finally say something with confidence after:
stumbles into the room covered in blood. hi i’m here for the torchbearer qna. ignore that i’m biased. it happens. anyways. what’s your like… i dunno what’s a Core Memory you have with her… just something that sticks out. it doesn’t have to be a Big Event it can be small. just somethin near and dear to you
MY BEAUTIFUL AND BELOVED FAWN FRIEND YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES THANK YOUUUUUUUUUUU I HAVE SO MANY CORE MEMORIES WITH TORCHIE FOR REALSIES!!!
Honestly though? I think the moment/day Torch actually has a True Crying Sesh with me sticks out.
It sounds sad I know I knowww but-! Something makes me so warm and my heart aches with such love when I think about being there for her, you know? They travel cycle after cycle, always carrying the love for Clancy and that perceived 'burden' of not succeeding to heart so intensely. She's so sensitive and soft even if she won't show anyone how she's feeling becuase he thinks he shouldn't feel. That's the part that makes it memorable though. Her deciding that I was someone worth being vulnerable with. Someone trusted who Understood the pain of what a Clancy shaped hole in your heart feels like.
The first time I could hold her in my arms and let her head rest on my shoulder while my hands find her bare back and rub slowly. Probably after sex, because I know we also use sex a lot to distract ourselves from overthinking especially about Clancy. But rubbing her bare, freckled back while she starts to shake and sniffle, trying so hard to pull herself together real quick. And I just kiss the side of her temple and whisper:
"It's okay, you know...To not be okay right now. I'm here. I'm Covering You."
Torch has always been the one covering others. He's used to being alone in his feelings. But the first time he can start to cry, with real tears, and hold me close and whimper and sob, and I am there petting her hair and whispering sweet nothings into her ear to calm her down...It's a real Milestone for us you know? The chance to take care of someone who has always been taking care of others is my biggest wish, to be that trusted someone who is always with them and who knows their heart better than anyone else...I think that's a moment we have that really cements each other in our minds as one of The Ones we have in our life. Our love. Our unwavering commitment to one another.
Sometimes I think she thinks I'm only with her because I love Clancy/Nova...but no. I need them to understand every single day that I love Torchbearer because of the amazing leader and friend and person she is, and that includes all of their flaws and sad moments and everything in between. Crying on me, leaning on me, feels like the first time she acknowledges it, and I couldn't be more proud of her for confiding in me!
Ohhhh sorry that got long but Im SOOOOOOOOO EMOTIONAL OVER THIS TRENCHTHING OK-
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Holding Torchbearer...kissing her....rubbing her face with my thumbs so gently. Feeling the bumps and sun kissed and sunburned parts of his skin. Kissing his eyelashes. Admiring the way there's flecks of light and warmth like fire in his beautiful eyes. Feeling the steady way she breathes, holds me back, and kisses me. Her lips are chapped and warm and oh, she's so warm. Together we sweat but we don't care. We hold and we endure because that's what we mean to one another <3