integrative project two thousand twenty one

DECEMBER 5, 2021

NOVEMBER 28, 2021

As the end of the semester approaches, I’ve been continuing on with my material research. Comparing this object to the last experimentation I posted, I find that this is more representative of body horror, more specifically open wounds. 

NOVEMBER 21, 2021

As I prepare for my IP Review, I’m reminded of the progress I’ve made thus far and all of the making I have done for the sake of experimenting and preparing. On Wednesday, we had a critique in which I was told that my material experiments were more reflective of body horror instead of pregnancy. In order to resolve this, I plan on using more round, bulbous forms that will evoke feelings of bellies, breasts, or other reproductive imagery. I was also recommended to play with various liquids or fluids that could remind audience members of birth. I’m going to experiment with creating a substance that looks like breastmilk which can be dripped out of one of these forms. 

NOVEMBER 12, 2021

This week I’ve been preparing to make. I haven’t done a lot of material experiments thus far, but I went out to purchase supplies and bought various types of stretchy, flesh colored, materials. Today I met with Annica, one of the fibers professors at Stamps, and she provided me with a lot of encouragement and inspiration. There are two books that I’m looking to check out from the UMICH library, and this upcoming Monday I will be spending class experimenting with my materials. My goal is to make sagging, stretched out, sculptures that appear to be worn and grotesque. 

NOVEMBER 9, 2021

Similarly to last week, I don’t have a lot of visual images to show of my progress, since most of it has been research completed digitally. Over the past week I have:

-Completed the body portion of my small scale sculpture. I draped fabric over the form and added paint to give it depth and color. I focused on making the stomach the darkest, covering it in black, purple, and red paint to give it a bruised and bloody look. 

-As for interviews, I have interviewed 4 people thus far including myself. There have been my sister, me, my friend Nicole, and my mother. It’s been interesting to see how the answers to the questions have differed based on the age of the interviewee. My sister, who has been the youngest person I have interviewed, was very much against having children and made that clear in her interview. Where as my mother, who has been the oldest participant, was very much the opposite, citing that she has always wanted children. 

-I have also completed a Stamps grant application which means I have completed an itemized list of costs and supplies I will be needing for my project. 

-I completed the first part of the annotated bibliography, and have began working on the second which is due in November. I am one third of the way through. 

-I submitted the mid-semester review which laid out a timeline, project statement, documentation photos, research, and concerns about the project. 

This week I don’t have an physical work to show, as we had Fall Break on Monday and spent Wednesday working on grant proposals. Instead I’m going to layout what I want to work on moving forward. 

Small Scale Sculpture: As seen in one of my previous posts, I’m working on a small scale model to better illustrate what the final piece will look like. I’m going to work on a small quilt to add to the model and am planning on using paint to fill in the quilted squares to illustrate how it may look. 

Interviews: As of right now, I’m thinking of interviewing people on their experiences with pregnancy, asking them questions about larger societal impacts of pregnancy and motherhood. Then, I’ll take key quotes from the interviews and create scrolls which will be held in the sculptures stomach. Ideally this will encourage viewer interaction and prompt them to take a scroll, then make their own, further continuing the conversation about the pressures of pregnancy.

Lists of Costs: I am also going to be breaking down the cost of supplies to try and get a better idea of how much I’ll be spending. This will better inform me of the amount of money I’ll try and get from grants. 

OCTOBER 13 2021

Critique: On Monday 10/11 we had our first critique. After presenting my sketch and material exploration, I got a lot of feedback about the lens in which I’m working and got some recommendations for research.

-Artist Mary Kelly, a woman who focused on miscarriages and pregnancy, using installation.

-”Beloved” by Toni Morrison. I haven’t read it but a peer of mine said it focused a lot on maternal relationships which may be useful for my research. 

-”The Husband Stitch” is said to be a collection of short stories that tells the audience about body horror, which is really relevant to my research. 

Moving Forward: As of right now, I’m working on a small model of what my installation will look like. I’m also documenting different ways the audience can interact with the piece and like the idea of the viewer being required to reach inside the stomach and grabbing something. I think using engagement in such a tactile way will help get across the idea of the lack of autonomy women face during the 9 months when they’re pregnant. 

OCTOBER 7, 2021

These are a couple of ‘mood boards’ thinking about colors and physical processes that have inspired some of the aesthetics of my sketches. The first highlights various stages of bruising, as well as photos of organs, followed by close up images of stretch marks. Although graphic and somewhat disgusting, these photos highlight natural aspects of the human form, which is something I’m interested in conveying in my sculpture.

Colors are something that I’m always thinking about and are a big part of my project. In the horror genre, aesthetics are hugely important, which is something I want to incorporate into my work. Since this project is so focused on natural bodily processes, I want the use colors that you see on the body. Throughout all my journaling and sketching I keep coming back to the word “grotesque”. I would love for my piece to look disturbing and gross while simultaneously intriguing.

OCTOBER 6, 2021

This week, I was focused on completing material experiments and flushing out my overall concept for our critique on Monday. I found that doing a larger, complete sketch helped me to better understand the space I want to utilize and the colors I want to explore.

Ideally, I want the colors I use to be somewhat ‘fleshy’, mimicking the human form and the ways it can be distorted- making it grotesque (i.e. bruises, stretch marks, organs, blood, etc.).

SEPTEMBER 23 2021

-Studio Inquiry Questions: This week has been full of asking questions about my project both to myself and others. Hearing what others had to say made me think a lot about the materials I’ll be using and how I want to be intentional with my message, making sure not to romanticize poor treatment of pregnant women. I also think that I should speak to some people around me about what it’s like to be pregnant. I don’t have any first hand experience so it’s important that I find someone who has a better understanding of childbirth. 

-Bibliography: I have found so many resources and academic papers written about this subject! I am so incredibly excited about that! I also have been looking into films to watch regarding the topic. I’m sure I will have much more than 20 references because there’s so much valuable information out there about pregnancy in the horror genre and what it means on a larger scale. 

-Sketches: As I have been journaling, I’m wondering if I can overlay a quilt on top of the human form rather than having them be two separate things. Could this quilt be a gradient that gets darker/more intense/sinister in comparison to the rest? Could the pregnant belly be an empty cavity for something? What could I put into it? 

SEPTEMBER 15 2021

Things that happened this week:

-Make-a-thon: For our process of creating 50 iterations I focused on making a small quilt from 50 different explorations of materials and stitches I could use to combine them. I utilized various materials such as silk, satin, cotton, and lace. Overall, I found it interesting the types of stitches I could make and how they could tie into some sort of ‘medical stitch’ used during pregnancy.

-Process Inquiry Questions: For my process inquiry questions I focused on finding how I could relate and explore pregnancy being that I have never been pregnant. I thought about how horror films act as a catalyst for the lack of bodily autonomy women have during pregnancy. I also thought about what pregnancy symbolizes in horror and what these meanings mean in a larger context (i.e. pregnancy and fear of childbirth in general). 

SEPTEMBER 8 2021

Feedback from my project proposals really helped me to further my ideas. I decided to follow advice from Holly and look into the common themes throughout the three of my proposals: horror and female autonomy. I was intrigued by the idea of looking into horror, more specifically within the ‘pregnancy sub-genre’. I would love to further explore and research ideas regarding the body and it’s transformation during pregnancy and its significance in horror.

I was told to research the ‘Monster Theory’, which says that the beasts, monsters, or demons within film are often “symbolic expression of cultural unease that pervade a society and shape its collective behavior.” (Cohen). What is one Monster that women are fearful of in our everyday lives? Interference in our reproductive rights. I would love to focus on the ways pregnancy is being controlled by others and how this is a threat to real people every day. Later on I’m hoping this could manifest itself in a mixed media/fiber sculpture that explores the “Monster” that is reproduction and pregnancy and how women are so often told what to do with their bodies under the guise of advice. I want to find more connections to pregnancy and horror, but this seems to be a good beginning.

For now, I will begin watching these films and trying to pick up on some common themes, hopefully I’ll begin with “Baby Blood”. Questions for future me:

- How does wanted vs. unwanted pregnancies interact with the ‘Monster’?

SEPTEMBER 1 2021

SUMMER ASSIGNMENT POSTER 3