Of The Ring

“Whoa, when did you get this?”

“Who did this to you?”

“Hold still— I need to clean it.”

“I’m supposed to believe this was an accident?”

“Damn— I’d hate to see the other guy.”

“Does this hurt when I touch it?”

“What the hell, ___? Another fight?”

“What the hell happened to your face?”

“Why are you so calm about this? You’re really hurt.”

“I think your arm is broken. It’s not supposed to bend like that.”

“Here, let me help you with that.”

“You’re bleeding a lot. Too much. Apply more pressure. I’m calling an ambulance.”

“Did you think I was gonna leave you like this?”

“Instead of helping you, they ran off? What an asshole.”

“You need to be more careful. You keep getting hurt like this and you’ll put yourself out of commission.”

“Let me grab the first-aid kit. Don’t move.”

“So, do you wanna explain to me what the hell happened?”

“You look really pale. Sit down. I don’t need you fainting before I get this stitched-up.”

“I’m not blaming you, I’m just saying this looks awfully suspicious.”

“How many of them were there? This doesn’t look like one man’s doing.”

“Sit still. I need to clean this before it gets infected.”

“Wiggle your fingers. I need to make sure it’s not broken.”

“This is gonna hurt. A lot. But it’ll be quick. I need to pop it back into place.”

“I told you not to act recklessly like that. You might think you’re protecting me, but you’re gonna get yourself killed if you keep jumping in like that.”

a shit ton of lines from different vines.

‘ look at all those chickens. ’ 

‘ i’ve always wanted to do this! ’

‘ i fell down the stairs. i hate when nobody shares. ’

‘ can you tell me a bedtime story? ’

‘ bro, you can’t tell anybody. ’  

‘ yeah, i’m good. i’m just happy for you.’ 

‘ dude, it’s like we kissed! ’

‘ TAKE THE PICTURE! ’ 

‘ oh, my god. we just locked eyes. ’

‘ yooo! ’ 

‘ you look upset. ’

‘ i got bit by a spider. it gave me superpowers! ’

‘ i’d be a unicorn. because no one believes in me. ’

‘ yeaaah, yeaaah. ’ 

‘ the only fitness here is me fitting this pizza in my mouth! ’

‘ well, i don’t have to do anything except pay taxes and die. ’

‘ girl, you look fierce today! WE LOVE IT. ’

‘ can i get a waffle? can i PLEASE get a waffle? ’

‘ I WON’T HESITATE, BITCH! ’ 

‘ i’ll beat your ass if that’s a ticket. ’ 

‘ you want some vodka? ’

‘ road work ahead? uh, yeah, i sure hope it does. ’

‘ i smell like beef. ’

‘ you better STOP YELLING. ’

‘ your secret’s safe with me. ’

‘ and we are two very supportive guys. ’

‘ MY BEST FRIEND POOPED HIS PANTS! ’

‘ honey, you’ve got a big storm comin’. ’  

‘ fuck you, that’s why! ’

‘ yeah, no shit, honey! ’ 

‘ today’s forecast. we can clearly see that somebody got me fucked up. fucked. up. ’

‘ is that a weed? i’m calling the police! ’

‘ just shut up and die slowly, okay? ’ 

‘ i sneezed! ’

‘ i got my hat on backwards and it’s time to fucking party. ’

‘ hey, how you doing? ’ 

‘ i’m doin’ just fine. i lied. i’m dying inside ’

‘ oh my god, why can’t you just take the fricken compliment! ’

‘ and they were roommates! ’

‘ i wanna fucking die. ’

‘ you remember one time i liked you? ’

‘ yo, drink this vodka down the hatch. c’mon. ’

‘ mother trucker, dude! that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick! ’

‘ he needs some milk! ’

‘ the yo-yo master did not answer. he just kept on yo-ing ’

‘ WHAT’S UP, FUCKERS? ’

‘ bored as sheeeet. ’

‘ do you ever shut the fuck up? ’

‘ welcome back to me screaming.   ’

‘ sorry, i’m on the toilet. ’

‘ babe, are you serious? ’

‘ i gotta go home cause i forgot to… vacuum my room.  ’

‘ NO WHAT’D YOU SAY? WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE! ’