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@cigarettesmokeandroses

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Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk
“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”
Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?
Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby
Husband: RIVETING!
Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️
Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!
Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk
All of tumblr collectively at my husband:
Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream
Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!
Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued
Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.
THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND
yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this
Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays
Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.
????
Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave
Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!
FYI this is how you get a Deals Warlock if you were wondering
I have follow up questions:
1) Did you participate in baby talk to make up for your husband's deficit, or did you also opt to speak to the Deals Warlock like a very tiny adult from babyhood?
1a) If you participated in baby talk with Penny, did she ever do any code switching with you while she was learning to talk (I mean, babyish talk back to you but fully formed adult like you share with us to Lawyer Dad)?
I didn't baby talk with her very much either! I think I squealed at her more than my husband did.
Something funny that has happened is that while she formally calls me Mama when she's answering me in passing she does call me "My Darling Love" and I don't know for sure but I think it's because I call her and her father "my loves" and her father calls me and her "darlings" and she's created a mash up 😂
So I'll say "okay penny it's time for bed" and I'll just hear "okay my darling love!" 😂
Everyone is always so so kind on this post but I do want to warn you all that this did in fact lead to an insanely verbal child, and if you choose that life you have to commit to that life.
Penny Rose is now 5 years old and she
1. Starts talking the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she passes out at night
2. Asks, and I am not exaggerating I counted, an average of 892 questions a day
3. Does not accept "I don't know" as an answer to said questions, will usually have a follow up question as to why you don't know OR a suggestion on how we can find out together
I pay for limitless data and have 709 Google tabs open on my phone at all times
1) My dad was also like this with me. Best example - reading a manual for a washing machine to me as an infant. Didn't turn into a Deals Warlock, but I did become a writer, so make of that what you will.
2) If you are the type of person who counts how many questions your child asks you in a day, and didn't give up after like ten of 'em, *and* potentially did so more than once (you said she "averages" at 892, meaning you might have gotten your data from at least two days)... then I think she is Like That because of both sides of her family, actually
Me, to child: why are you Like That
Child: *is Like That*
Me: must be their other parent
Me: *is also Like That*
Im sorry but it is so funny how people outside of tumblr view us. Like why are the tiktokers treating tumblr like some professional ass website you need to do extensive prep before you begin posting on. And the follower farming advice is so fucking funny to me when this is the website where people actively hate getting new followers
Tumblr is the website where you ramble to yourself like a madman until someone decides they like you and put you into their pocket like a shiny rock. That's how you get followers
"have some idea of content you want to do", "have lots of drafts before posting" - no, silly, just post whatever comes to your mind at 2 AM. the best thing about tumblr is that you can start rambling about some obscure background character from a 3000 year old poem, and there'll always be someone equally invested
The anti-vax and anti-science propaganda is very real - and also, frankly I think doctors and nurses would've had an easier time getting people not to fall for it if they spent less time treating people like fucking shit
This post is about a lot of things but it is especially about racism, medical abuse, and eugenics
i want to do a painting of a tiger taking a bath to put in a bathroom (bathroom-themed bathroom) and to this end i made a little maquette out of clay and i suspect this will scope creep into having both a painting and sculpture of a tiger or perhaps only a sculpture of a tiger. if i do both should they be displayed together or separately
Tiger maquette by the way 🐅
Working on cutting out a large piece of wood to do the painting on, which is a constraint that will either be really fun or really annoying. Maybe both
Wood primed and underpainted and sketch transferred mostly by cutting it out in different chunks and tracing around them. Stripes to be determined. Nobody let me work on this again for at least two weeks
The finished Ms. Tigers

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once you notice half of all memes are just a picture of a black person with unrelated text over them you really cannot unsee it
this is actually horrific right? we can all agree about that?
I'd never thought I needed to be paranoid about the fact that photos I share on social media might be turned into memes in a discord run by JuicyBigNut but that's what existing in a public space as a black person is like! not to mention the fact that they don't even know who the man in the picture, yet we know who first spread it and no one has beaten that guy to death yet
this is a historical trend and i highly recommend reading “black meme: the history of images that make us” by legacy russell for those wanting to learn more (especially fellow white people!)
They post this like the “progressives” didn’t just field a candidate that literally said “put Jews in camps.”
She specified Zionists, who are no better than Nazis.
i feel strongly about this
This is… not a good idea.
(Also if anyone suggests a rapier they legally have to watch the video again until you understand why that wouldn’t work)

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you know those studies showing that cursing helps with pain tolerance or whatever. that’s how i feel about making my weird little noises to get through my basic daily activities. sometimes you just have to go hggblaaaah for a minute so you can find the strength within yourself to get up or wash the dishes or send an email. mmmnneh. urgh. the torments are unending but you can always make some little sounds about it.
Demons and monsters that torture people because they feed on human suffering are so dumb. People are suffering everywhere my guy go literally any place and take a deep whiff.
Monster that feeds on suffering becomes a professional caretaker for people with chronic pain and terminal illnesses. They can't change the fact that these people are suffering, but they help a bit and in the meantime they're fat and happy off that Sweet Sweet ambient pain in the air.
Two towns over there's a demon lord trying to get their cult to abduct people for torture, but they keep getting stopped by heroes and the like, so they're barely scraping by. Meanwhile Belogarth the Registered PCA is chowing down on back pain, medication side effects and looming mortality for eight hours a day and has become the most powerful demon on earth without realizing it.
"But don't their clients feel weird knowing that they're feeding off their suffering?" No they think it's hilarious and they're real shits about it.
Finally a medical professional who believes that they are in pain. Because the fucker is actively chowing down on your agony. Not only am I going to get treated by them I'm going to invite all of my chronically ill friends to come as well.
Turns out if you treat the pain then the humans will bring you more humans who are suffering. It's like a restaurant where the waiter is so impressed by your ability to eat food they're giving you more on the house
They say things like "well, it's a real feast day for Belogarth today!" and "if my meds are held up at customs again I'm gonna put Belogarth in a food coma" and Belogarth is the one feeling weird about it
Mammal in a Sunday Dress, by Georgina M. Cox, 2026
Mammal in a Sunday Dress explores the uneasy relationship between femininity, civilisation, and the animal body. At first glance, the figure appears modest and withdrawn. Her posture is composed, her gaze seemingly lowered towards her bare feet, recalling the conventions of nineteenth-century portraiture where women were often depicted as passive objects of observation. Yet as the viewer moves closer, the illusion collapses. Her eyes are not lowered at all. She is looking directly back. The delayed eye contact transforms the encounter. The viewer approaches believing they are safely observing a woman; instead, they realise they have been observed themselves. The work refuses the traditional power dynamic of portraiture, denying the comfort of anonymous spectatorship. Looking becomes a reciprocal act. For Cox, the painting considers humanity's persistent desire to separate itself from the rest of the animal kingdom. The title quietly undermines this distinction. A "mammal" is not another creature—it is us. The Sunday dress, rich with cultural associations of femininity, morality, and respectability, becomes an attempt to distinguish ourselves from nature. Yet clothing cannot alter biology. Beneath lace and ritual remains the same vulnerable animal body. The work also reflects on the historical relationship between women and nature. Across art, religion, and philosophy, women have repeatedly been positioned as closer to instinct, emotion, reproduction, and the body itself, while men have been aligned with reason, culture, and civilisation. Mammal in a Sunday Dress does not reject this comparison. Instead, it questions why proximity to nature has so often been treated as something lesser. Chiaroscuro isolates the figure within darkness, allowing the luminous dress to symbolise the performance of civilisation while the bare feet quietly return the body to the earth. Neither is presented as more truthful than the other. The painting exists in the tension between performance and instinct, refinement and biology. Mammal in a Sunday Dress ultimately asks a simple but unsettling question: if every layer of culture were stripped away, what would remain? Not a king. Not a saint. Not a gentleman or a lady. Only another mammal, looking back.
source
#current sexuality: scott mccall being a badass true alpha in season four
"Close Personal Friend Mr. Drugs" has had me roaring with laughter for the last few minutes.

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Size comparison of Y’gathok, the Ceaseless Hunger and Bjorn, our level 20 Goliath Barbarian.
Hey quick question: why the FUCK do you have that
Imagine, from out of nowhere, your dm casually slapping this thing down on the table like any other encounter.
“Yeah, the fight will start in a sec, uh…I’ll give inspiration to whomever helps me get this fucking box out of my car.”
https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/7asxci/oc_ygathok_the_ceaseless_hunger_final_boss_of_our/ This is the reveal of this ridiculousness during their game
Please watch this reveal video it’s kickass
FUCK ME the reveal video
“CHRIS??????”
“Um, I don’t think our plan is gonna work.”
Always reblog Y'gathok
always ALWAYS reblog Y'gathok!
ive only reeeeally seen this on reddit but in case it exists in other online spaces, i think the expectation that every artist should be recording themselves drawing so they can whip it out as evidence if they get accused of using gen ai is so fucking stupid, and not even reasonable either.
these people clearly dont know how much storage space keeping excess videos on your computer/in your drives takes up. if youre working on a shittier pc or tablet, itll lag if youre recording, which makes art an absolute nightmare.
maybe instead of trying to set a precedent that every artist Needs to have ammunition to fight ai claims, people who know absolutely nothing about art shouldnt be blindly accussing every artist they see!
and thats not even to say i dont think you should learn to recognize gen ai. of COURSE you should. but if youre not an expert on it, its not your place to just accuse random artists on twitter or whatever. just shut your trap maybe lol
I have bad news: it's gotten worse on reddit. There's a sub dedicated to picking apart videos too. People are up in here calling out coloring methods and more. All things I've seen disabled artists do, specifically.
This is a disabled artist I know that responded to this. They draw and color in specific ways to cope with the struggles of sight and physical disabilities.
If you're an artist, do not act like you're the perfect expert on how to draw.
this is actually a good point. even artists can be misled into thinking they know all regarding this.
everyone goes about their art differently, for different reasons. i merge my layers a LOT when i work. does that mean when i cant provide screenshots of separate layers, i Must have not drawn my art?
the idea that "you dont manage your layers how i would Expect an artist to, so you must be faking it" is just so ridiculous
I too know that disabled artist with sight issues, I love how they work in such unique ways. They're absolutely not AI and I feel insulted now. My parents have been artists since the 1960s. They understand layers!
If you are not an artist, yes, obviously don't fling accusations. But if you have never worked with AI image/text generators, even cursorily, your accusations will be shit for that reason, too, because you are flat-out uninformed about its capabilities and limitations and its quirks. What it's hard to get it to do. What it's not capable of YET. What it's good enough at that it can pass as something completely done by a person. How much human effort goes into getting given results (potentially way more than you think) vs doing it totally without AI. If you don't understand how it works, and most people who oppose it proudly do not, don't assume you can always spot it, or that when you think you have, you are correct.
So just don't harass anyone over it. It doesn't help and you are likely enough to be wrong that it does more harm than good.
If you think it's AI, don't interact. Rage rewards the algorithm. Block and walk away. This problem is not going to be solved by harassing individual artists. I don't like where we're at, either. I want things to change. This is not how that gets done. Walk away. Walk away. Walk away.