death seems so peaceful
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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almost home
macklin celebrini has autism

oozey mess
h
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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@chub-bea
death seems so peaceful

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pathetic lil baby worm ewwww
i think im in love with bob belcher
this is what love sounds like

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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mmmmmm goat liquid dripping in my socks auahh
clay crafts i did months ago ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?
i never met my dad, my mum and nan raised me and i have a step dad since i was 13, overall yes but i have some grudges.
02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?
probably my pet snail poppy.
03: Do you regret anything?
most of my life, specifically, my shyness.
04: Are you insecure?
yes, very much so.
05: What is your relationship status?
single and very much numb from trauma due to my last relationship.
06: How do you want to die?
early.
07: What did you last eat?
skin from my fingers.
08: Played any sports?
i like to sit.
09: Do you bite your nails?
all day.
10: When was your last physical fight?
i like to sit but i did play fight with my sister when i was 10.
11: Do you like someone?
always.
12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?
probably.
13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?
always.
14: Do you miss someone?
painfully.
15: Have any pets?
ive had many, currently my giant african land snail.
16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?
anxious for sure.
17: Ever made out in the bathroom?
i have not had my first kiss yet, unless the kiss when i was 7 counts.
18: Are you scared of spiders?
not always, i want tarantulas but i don’t want to touch.
19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
no, i already know what happened it would be like rewatching a boring movie.
20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?
never, i have a phobia of spit, never will.
21: What are your plans for this weekend?
im staying with friends, drinking, cutting, crying.
22: Do you want to have kids? How many?
none or 10.
23: Do you have piercings? How many?
7. stretched ears, two second lobe, septum, both nostrils.
24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?
art.
25: Do you miss anyone from your past?
no.
26: What are you craving right now?
a hug.
27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
maybe, how would i know.
28: Have you ever been cheated on?
technically no.
29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?
maybe, we were LD so it would be easy to hide.
30: What’s irritating you right now?
my headache.
31: Does somebody love you?
probably.
32: What is your favourite color?
green.
33: Do you have trust issues?
slightly.
34: Who/what was your last dream about?
travelling with a friend from college around a city.
35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?
my mum.
36: Do you give out second chances too easily?
yes, im soft.
37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?
forgive, its hard to forget.
38: Is this year the best year of your life?
no.
39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?
still haven’t had it, unless the kiss when i was 7 counts.
40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?
no.
51: Favourite food?
bagel + cream cheese + salmon.
52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?
no.
53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?
took my glasses off.
54: Is cheating ever okay?
no, its weak.
55: Are you mean?
depends on the person.
56: How many people have you fist fought?
0.
57: Do you believe in true love?
no, love is made not found.
58: Favourite weather?
cold weather, hot wind, bright, light showers.
59: Do you like the snow?
no.
60: Do you wanna get married?
no, it feels very corporate rather than sacred.
61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?
no, its kinda cringe.
62: What makes you happy?
my friend.
63: Would you change your name?
no, out of respect for my great grandmother i was mamed after.
64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?
no, he is a dog.
65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
whatever they want.
66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?
yes.
67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?
my friend.
68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?
my friend.
69: Do you believe in soulmates?
no.
70: Is there anyone you would die for?
yes, my friend.
wow ive never self harmed this consistently because of emotion in years holy shit this sucks
fuck i want to die

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i drank half a bittle of sine so i feel much better, i love this feeling its so noce. it gave me he strength to watch a mkvie to make myself stip crying and i did some shopping on elf because i want to spend mkney on makeup because all my stuff right now is shit haha anyway ill correct the spelling tomorrow i need to sleep
*bottle *wine *nice *movie *stop *money
i don’t deserve to eat right now im fucking disgusting
i wish i could cut deeper, i wish i could have stitches so i could be taken seriously, apparently the 5 years of consistent self harm isn’t enough.
i want to stop breathing, not be strangled to death, choke on a grape or drown. i just want to stop, like when an old person takes their last breath and everything stops, thats all i want, but i can’t live that long..
seeing my friend is literally the only reason i am staying alive.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
im not outwardly mentally ill or disruptive so i guess im not as big as a priority but whenever they talk about suicide prevention they always bring up if a person is withdrawn to check up on them because they will be in the acceptance of death phase of suicide.
its so fucking hypercritical
i think ive gotten so good at pretending to be the “functioning mentally ill daughter” that ive forgotten that im not okay. i don’t want to be here. i can smile and joke and pretend im okay but i haven’t felt happiness in months, and when i do feel happy it feels like a sick perverse emotion i shouldn’t be having because its so unnatural to me. i don’t know what i can do because people might assume i have just gotten bad mentally and not believe me if i tell them how long i have actually been feeling this way.
ive been on a waiting list for nhs mental health services to get therapy for more weeks than i can remember, i can’t wait that much longer.