clo

To love again, you must not discard what has happened to you. Take from it the strength you’ll need to carry on.

On average it takes me 7 days, 7 days of not speaking to you before my mind goes numb to the rest of the world and all I can think of is you.

My body  yearns for yours  like a  hungry stomach yearns for food. Perhaps there’s so little left of me, I’m searching for something new in you. I think of you in my bed, sensations so physical, so real. Is there a word, maybe  somewhere between love and lolita, to describe how I feel?  It’s wrong wrong wrong wrong. They’ll say it until saliva no longer drips from their tongues. But I am not in the business of denying myself the things  that I want. And what likely tempts you is the burning curiosity of how my part-rigid- part-soft-body looks at dawn,  when light gleams through the window and I roll into your arms, slow and steady for once, eyes sleepy with calm. I say, Let the sun rise.  I’ll give pleasure to your eyes,  and you can, god, yes yes you can try me on for size.

I’m sorry that I sometimes need to be reminded that I am good enough, that I am important to you. It’s just that I always grew up thinking that I wasn’t enough for anyone around me so when you came along and told me that I was what you wanted, it was just too hard for me to believe.