Things that I enjoy

hello i am so in love with this shot

“All that matters is that there's a hay mattress on the floor, wood for the fire, and each other. The honeymoon phase.”

It’s not me, it’s my hands… my hands are much older than the rest of me.

For this exquisite art by @chicalepidoptera that I stared at for some time before playing.

Oh my god, I just have to let go for this art don’t I? What will happen? I have no idea! Ahhhhhh!

What happened was… long!

Is this when I admit I knew about Nicolas chopping off his own hand before we saw it on TV, and in my head I had created an entire story along these lines:

Nicolas: “Did you ever really love me, Lestat? Or was it only ever my music you loved? Well, let us find out! Let us find out right this instant!”  

Lestat: “Nicki!  Nicki, no!”

Nicolas: *THWUNK!!! With the Lathing Hatchet*

Nicolas: “Well? Do you love me now? Do you still love me now I cannot play?  Now I shall never play violin again?  DO YOU LOVE ME NOW, LESTAT?”

Lestat: *Horrified* 

I am melodrama. 

On TV, I interpret it as the hands creating perfect music on and on into eternity, while Nicki's mind and soul are destroyed.  So all the talk of the issue being his hands, the letter opener… “My hands are much older than the rest of me” - they are his mortal hands - perfected, while the rest of him is his mortal self - corrupted.  But my interpretation takes just that - interpretation.

I just think, Nicolas is in mania, yes… but there is always reason behind it as I understand him, even when Lestat cannot see it. I also feel like,  did you ever love me, or was it only the music would be more disturbing to Lestat, more incomprehensible - as it places Lestat as the reason for the act in Nicki's mind, illogical as it is. And... I mean... doesn't it make more sense for Nicolas?

Psychologically, I can imagine Niclas chopping off his own hand, though.  That works for me. I can fully envision him doing that, however he gets there.  Although I guess we don’t know for certain it happened this way.   Oh my, I need some certainty!  Hold me!

I also knew about the poker… and I was so excited, because I literally wrote a teenaged Nicolas and terrible doings with a poker… and I was probably writing that while the last bits of S3 were being filmed… but then we didn’t see the poker. And I am even less certain if the poker happened…?

I don’t know.

One must imagine Nicolas happy

I wanted to make a post with all the things Nicolas I wish we had gotten this season so I figured I'd just wait till I had a new Nicki drawing to post. He may have done nothing for Lestat as a muse cause Lestat is a loser, but he sure has done wonders for me.

Anyway, in no particular order:

-Hallucination Nicki and Claudia tag teaming up to bully Lestat.

-Lestat actually interacting with hallucination Nicki.

-More Nicki playing the violin.

-Nicki writing plays.

-Nicki and Armand's relationship, their friendship during the years they run the theatre together.

-Armand in present day discussing his relationship with Nicolas.

-Lestat saying goodbye to Nicki's hallucination like Louis did with Lestat's in season 2.

-Nicki being depressed prior to his turning.

-Nicki being a cynical bitch.

-Nicki being sweet and supportive towards Lestat when he was struggling.

-Nicki's funeral party and Nicki being at peace for a moment.

-Nicki being angry and bitter disillusioned with the world.

-Nicki's outburst at Lestat after becoming a vampire.

Nicki should have been on the head of that soul Table as a creator of Lestat.

GabrieLLE got him his dogs, guns, and horses, sent him to the monastery when he was a kid... No-one thinks about those things when we picture Lestat. We think maybe theatre, we think blasphemous lover, we think drama queen, art, delirium, religion tragedy and so much love.

You know who made human Lestat bawl his eyes out with the beauty of music? Nicki, the first time he played in front of him.

You know who told him to go to Paris even if they meant he would play music on the streets?

You know who brought up the witches' burning to discuss religiousness and then took Lestat there and played music to HONOR THE BuRNed WoMen??

Who showed Lestat the conflict of someone who has recently stopped believing in god? Traumatized him in the process and made him found himself again?

Nicki was a rebel, he defied his father and cared very little that the whole town knew he was disobeying just to play music.

He wasn't his first love. HE WAS A GREAT LOVe and a maker!!!!!

Without Nicki and the love Lestat felt for him, he would have never encountered the Paris coven, he would have never woken Akasha playing the violin. Antoinette was supposed to be a violinist because when his relationship with Louis stopped working, his mind went back to NiCKi!!!!! Lestat became a musician a RocksTar BC of Nickii

Nicki, it should have been you, Nicki, the horrors should have been you. Magnus' trauma should have been replaced with the desperation of Lestat looking for you, fighting for you, being heartbroken for you. Stop loving you, seeing how the light went out of your eyes because of his actions. Loving who you were and couldn't stand who you've become.

SAM: But also, there's a huge relationship –that we have not seen any of– which I just love! And I hope that we will see it... which is Armand and Lestat. There's a huuge relationship there! There's like a whole world– a whole world and a whole dynamic that has been an undercurrent, particularly in Lestat's life, that we have not fully examined for pretty specific reasons, for pretty needed reasons, um... and some practical reasons, which is locations, you know. So we have to be realistic about the locations that we can film in. So um, I've just been re-reading, you know, the books this past week and it just (Laughs) reiterates to me how much I love Armand as a character! And he's just such a crazy wonderful character, and there is a lot left to explore there.

AUTUMN: Also with talking about you rereading the books and everything, I mean do you have anything that would be on your personal wish list that you would like to see –scenes or things– reexamined, either specifically within Lestat and Armand, or just on a broader spectrum within the show?

SAM: May I turn that question around on you and ask you if there's anything that you would specifically like to see? (Laughs)

AUTUMN: I mean, so many things! So many things. I guess if we're going to Lestat and Armand... I just love the scene when Lestat goes to the ball and he's kind of–

SAM: Me too. Me too.

AUTUMN: –under the thrall and Armand attacks him and everything and they have that showdown, but then afterwards then Armand shows up at the tower, and begs Lestat and Gabrielle to take him along and they just say "No. Sorry, but..."

SAM: And we did– Look, we did have that scene in this season. It wasn't set in the tower, it was set somewhere else. But we did have that scene and um, for a variety of reasons it did have to go. And it was an amazing scene. So, I hope that there might be some iteration of that considering that it's already been written... um, yeah. But yeah no, I mean, I agree that there is a lot left there to unpack. Which I think is a good thing and I think the way that we look at the adaptation– it's... it's a very strong adaptation... I mean, if you l– And they're very good at transplanting certain things in different contexts.

AUTUMN: Yeah.

SAM: If you– The long table, for example, the first image that Akasha gives to Lestat of his past, is the physical long table of his father's home. So it's not like it's come straight out of nothing. It's come from a very specific place. And it should show you how they are adapting. If you're really wanting to get nerdy about it, it should show you how they are adapting the material because they are bleeding into several books at the same time. Particularly– and I love Anne Rice obviously, you know that I've dedicated a small portion of my life to it now, but she is prone to reiterating the same story over and over again. And she does say often, you know, the first prologue or chapter of each book will be like, "By the way, in case you didn't know, this was the plot." and then, "This is where we've been" and I think when you're doing television you have to be careful about not repeating overly or consciously the same beats again and again and again and again. So there is a way that they do look at, particularly now as we're going forward, I think they're pulling pretty strongly from the next books– In this, The Vampire Lestat, Queen of the Damned, and Tales of The Body Thief have really been pulled through, and they're adapting from all of them, and the Vampire Armand obviously, the revelation that Armand had severed Claudia's head and had tried to stitch her onto other bodies is obviously the um, inspiration for the butcher shop scene and feels very in-character (Laughs) for him even though it's very confronting. Um and his curiosity of how a body can survive... it's very reminiscent of the little kid pulling the legs off the insect and leaving them to slowly to die in that capacity. So yeah the way that they adapt these things, there's always room to go back and I think particularly when you start to look at The Queen of the Damned, there is a thread that existed from the Vampire Lestat that would not have made sense for them to have put it in that season. Particularly as they're examining him through a musical context and it was really a lot about the songs. It was really a lot about how this character has used his traumas and experiences of life to write music. But I, yeah. I mean look, don't hold your breath! Because I can't guarantee anything.

AUTUMN: No.

SAM: But yeah, the ball scene is a favorite of mine, and all the stuff around the tower is also a favorite of mine, yeah.

P.s: i literally cant wait to see your adaptation of Carrie, super excited!

"Tis a fearful thing to love what death can touch."

I mean, I would argue that Louis HAS seen himself as the victim/wronged (hence the whole punishibg-Lestat-with-Armand-actions for example), but Rolin‘s words are still…. what can I say.

“Not helping“ is definitely too kind.

The thing is, it’s not just about “lying twice“????

ARMAND KILLED LOUIS‘ (and Lestat‘s) FUCKING DAUGHTER

tried to kill him.

RJ is probably referring to what Armand is thinking

Because this is a gross misreading of Armand's character, Armand, who had a pretty good read on Louis in his own book, which shaped their later interactions.

Yes, Armand went and complained to Lestat about Louis, granted. But he also knew better than to demand an actually apology, because he knew what he did there.

Rolin Jones putting this up as a defense as to what Armand probably thought for the scene they wrote does not make it better, imho.

If anything, they should have kept the response then, namely Lestat laughing in his face and telling him to kill himself in the books - meaning in this re-applied context Louis should have told Armand to fuck off.

Because that "lie" was that Lestat (and the coven) was responsible for Claudia's death - and NOT Armand. THAT was that lie.

To reduce this to the "lie" in and by itself only, to say that Armand sees he deserves an apology for a relationship that was living hell for them both and in which Armand tried to break Louis' mind again and again because he "lied twice"???

Because yes, Armand in the book did have a pretty good read of Louis about it all.

But Armand and Louis in the show actually had a different during-and-post-Paris setup to their relationship than their book counterparts did.

Not only that, but their post-Paris time lasted longer, came about under different reasons than it did in the book, and Armand's role in the trial apparently went differently as well, with him actually planning on killing Louis along with Claudia.

In the book, Armand was always planning to save Louis and kill Claudia. In the book is was Armand who saved Louis, not Lestat.

The minute the show changed that, as well as changed it to Armand planning to have Louis die along with Claudia, is the moment they changed Armand and Louis' post-Paris dynamic and how Armand saw Louis after it.

Which, honestly, is something I kept trying to warn about if the show really was going to do this and have Armand really planning to have Louis die during the trial and not planning to save him in any way.

Because that would mean Armand spent decades with someone he never loved enough to want to protect in any way, which was always a key thing regarding Armand in the book. Which is, if he loves you, you are relatively safe from him.

Well, Armand in the show clearly never loved Louis enough for that. He was going to kill him.

And that created a ripple effect of what and how Armand viewed and saw Louis post-Paris. Along with Louis choosing to be with him over Lestat in the tower scene.

Because, in Armand's eyes, it all just looked to him like "Well, I was going to kill Louis, but Lestat saved him, and he's still here. And he's choosing to be with me over Lestat. Okay, I can put the conflicting feelings I had to the side and love him and be with him."

Especially if it really does turn out that the coven was twisting Armand's arm about the whole thing!? Like, that is a massive change that was, of course, going to have a ripple effect that bled into Louis and Armand's relationship post-Paris and Armand's outlook towards Louis!

Because again, in the book, Armand orchestrated the whole thing, including the saving of Louis. Lestat had nothing to do with it, meaning there was never some secret Armand in the book was holding back about how and why Louis was saved, nor about his full role in the trial and how he saved Louis from death. It was all openly known between both Louis and himself.

None of that was going on here between them in the show.

Changing Armand's role in the trial like this pretty much changed how Armand viewed Louis post-Paris.

Not to even mention the fact that Armand, in the show, is very much committed to the Great Laws, whereas in the book, he very much was not.

And also, another big change was to have Louis openly choose to be with Armand and say so to Lestat, in the tower scene, which also appears to have happened. And which now seems to have taken the place of the New Orleans scene when Armand went to Lestat complaining about Louis leaving him.

Only, you know, now being the opposite thing. With Louis choosing to be with Armand (over Lestat) instead of about to leave Armand.

(And boy, does Rolin Jones love starting things in an opposite place from what people expect.)

So yeah, with all of that being different regarding Armand's character on the show, which led to how differently things apparently went down on Armand's end regarding the trial in the books vs how it went down in the show? And how different the aftermath of it all was, with Louis openly choosing to go with Armand and telling Lestat so to his face, with Armand right there?

Then yes, this all makes 100% sense to me about this being how Armand viewed his relationship with Louis and it being his mindset and motivations regarding everything.

It is basically a ripple effect stemming from having Armand actually hold up and defend the Great Laws, instead of not really caring about them and only using them conveniently in the book to get rid of Claudia ... and Claudia alone.

And Assad's view of it 100% matches my own and what I said just a day or so ago of seeing that scene as Armand wanting Louis to confess to his side of the toxicity between them and not really wanting an apology about it.

So yeah. I always said that having Armand wanting to kill Louis during the trial would always be a significant change to Armand's character if that is really how it went down, and, well, it was.

And it also went along with changing him to actually hold to the Five Great Laws.

So you do all of that to Armand's character in the show, plus have Louis openly choosing to be with Armand over Lestat in that tower scene, which also seems to have taken place?

Well then, you have basically completely changed Armand and Louis' post-Paris dynamic and Armand's outlook about his relationship with Louis during that time, vs his book counterpart's view. It was absolutely unavoidable that it would be changed when doing it all this way.

Was Armand owed any sort of apology from Louis about it all? Hell. No. Because Armand did try to kill him during the trial and did kill Claudia.

But Armand thinking that Louis would "play the victim" and not confess to his own side in their toxic relationship unless he tortured a confession out of him? I think it's 100% something Armand would think about it all, given everything that has played out differently between them vs the book, starting with Paris and afterwards.

I mean, I would argue that Louis HAS seen himself as the victim/wronged (hence the whole punishibg-Lestat-with-Armand-actions for example), but Rolin‘s words are still…. what can I say.

“Not helping“ is definitely too kind.

The thing is, it’s not just about “lying twice“????

ARMAND KILLED LOUIS‘ (and Lestat‘s) FUCKING DAUGHTER

tried to kill him.

RJ is probably referring to what Armand is thinking