❛ ❪ ♡ : phantom pains.

gem hates this. every second of it. he’s here with wes. he’s safe. he hates that his brain plays these tricks on him, that the nightmares come just when he thinks he’s over them. all he wants is to feel normal again. of all the symptoms of his ptsd, the nightmares where one of the most severe ones. sometimes he came out of them with a pounding migraine that hurt so bad he got nauseous other times he woke up screaming or sobbing, fighting off invisible enemies. he didn’t know how he’d get through them if wes wasn’t there. it takes him a couple of minutes to get his breathing under control, although still a bit ragged. he had to stay calm. not panic. that was one of the harder parts. his eyes focus on wes as reality truly begins forming around him. he wasn’t in danger. he was at home, in bed, with his boyfriend. he was safe. there’s a sigh of relief from gem, albeit a shaky one. he lowers his head, one hand coming to rest against his forehead before he nods, raising his head, ‘i’m okay.’

unlike his boyfriend, seokmin was the baby of the family. by quite a few years too. his older sister was five years older than him and his brother was ten years older than him. thorn had spent much of his life being taken care of by his parents and older siblings. perhaps that’s why now as an adult he enjoys taking care of those around him. there were times where he would visit his family just to cook dinner for them. thorn and his family had always been close. they’d been by his side through all his rough patches. when he’d come out in high school, his sister and threatened the other students who had picked on thorn and his brother, never one to get violent, had even stepped in once or twice. thorn thought it was funny in a way. he was the baby of his family while seokmin was the oldest. maybe opposites really did attract. 

‘i made them just the way you like them.’ despite being a perfectionist when it came to cooking food for others, thorn didn’t really care much about what he ate. he had his favorites sure but he was easy to please. he loved trying new foods. that was the best part about traveling to thorn. getting to try food from all over the world. thorn fixes his own plate before slipping off his apron and joining seokmin at the table. this was his first serious relationship in three years. his last relationship hadn’t ended well and thorn had briefly sworn off ever dating again. ironic then that he would fall for seokmin, a regular at his resteraunt. thorn covers his pancakes in syrup before handing the bottle to seokmin, ‘do you have any appointments today?’

╰   ♡   luckily seokmin’s family, despite being pretty strict christians, were open to him when he came out as gay in high school. it’s thanks to the open communication in their household that he was comfortable enough to come out in the first place. while his family were a religious bunch, they weren’t hateful. seokmin is blessed to have them. he’s also blessed to have two little brothers who support him wholly; in fact, the two were in large part what picked him back up again after his sudden breakup a few years back. they’re good boys. 

Jisoo had decided to ride the bus that day as he didn’t really feel like driving. He was around cars around twenty four hours a day and he would often get tired of them. He just wanted to rest and enjoy the scenery for once. He didn’t mind that the bus was a bit crowded but, he could definitely tune them out. He could just look out the window or enjoy his music.

He looked up as the bus reached a stop and a few people had gotten off and more people were getting on. He saw a guy get out of the corner of his eye making sure to keep an eye on him incase he needed help. However, he wasn’t expecting the bus to start back up again. Before he knew it the guy he was looking at before had fallen into his lap. “Oh hello.” He gave the boy a smile showing him that he wasn’t angry with him at all. “It’s alright.” He tried his best to reassure him.

there was something about cooking that made thorn feel warm inside. it was a kind of inner peace that he didn’t feel anywhere else. his grandma and mother both used to tell him that food was magic and he was inclined to believe them. food made everything better. if someone was sad, food could cheer them up. if someone was happy, food could make them happier. it was beautiful to thorn. he’s always been an early riser, even when he was younger. it was around the time that he started high school that he’d begun cooking breakfast for his family and now that he lived with seokmin he continued on his ritual. there was no better way to start the day than with a heart breakfast. 

thorn is standing in front of the stove, working on the last of the pancakes. he’s still in his sweat pants and hadn’t bothered with a shirt, instead choosing to wear his cheesy ‘kiss the chef’ apron. it was cliche but it was cute nontheless, ‘that’s the point.’ thorn chuckled as he flipped the pancake, ensuring that it was the perfect golden brown color, ‘it’s all part of my master plan to lull you into a sense of security so that you stay with me forever and ever.’ he declared in a playfully dramatic turn, ‘don’t act like you don’t love it. my pancakes are heaven.’ he teased, putting the last pancake on a plate and turning of the stove, ‘good morning.’ he says handing the plate to seokmin before leaning in for a kiss, ‘come on. eat up.’

╰   ♡   seokmin can share a similar sentiment when it comes to preparing food. to him, it’s very much a love language. when he spent countless mornings in high school preparing food for his three baby brothers, it was always another way to take care of them; to show them that even if their parents were busy with this or that, seokmin was here. it was never about simply preparing a meal. more than that, it was keeping them healthy. full. giving them energy. sitting down at the table with them after working over the stove to watch them eat, feeling so good and warm inside that it threatened to spill from his pores. to this day, he’ll text his siblings every morning to make sure they’ve gotten a good breakfast. ( one appreciates it more than the other, but he doesn’t plan to stop any time soon. ) now living with thorn, he very much sees it in the same frame; thorn prepares breakfast as a way to show his love. seokmin can only hope to show even a fourth of his appreciation for that.

@chapcl·

please read tws in tags before reading!

the nightmares where usually the same. rough hands holding him down, malicious laughter, feelings that he’d give anything to forget creeping back to the forefront of his mind. it’s been over a year since the worst night of his life. he’s come so far from then. there was a time where he was unable to even leave the apartment. some days he wouldn’t get out of bed. it came and went. he had good days and bad days but one thing was certain to gem, he wouldn’t be able to get through any of them without wesley. on gem’s darkest days, he was there. gem can feel himself shaking, his breath growing ragged as the whimpers push past his lip but he can’t wake himself up. he hates this. the helplessness. the fear. fighting people who aren’t there as he sleeps. he knows that his boyfriend must have taken a few flying elbows as gem squirmed, ‘no.’ the word squeaks out of his mouth as he tosses on the bed. hands trembling as arms come up to push at bodies that are only there in his head, ‘no.’

╰   ♡   it’s easier to sleep in these days. not that seokmin has a particularly difficult time sleeping, but he likes to stick to a bit of a schedule ---- likes to have that order in his life. this includes getting up very early in the day to carry out tasks. most importantly, preparing a hardy and nutritious breakfast. ( it’s the most important meal of the day. he’ll stand by that. ) however, his need to get up and cook first thing in the morning has been declining more and more considering his boyfriend is quite the culinary expert, and also quite fond of making him food. you won’t hear a peep of complaint from seokmin about this! it is still quite jarring regardless to wake up later than usual with the smell of something good filling the air, while all he did was lay peacefully in bed. 

it happens to be one of these exact mornings. 

muse: chul oh

plot: there aren’t any seats left on this bus and it’d really help me because i have a bum knee right now, but i’ll make do..... unless the bus has other plans for me ??? whoops how did this happen

╰   ♡   let it be known that chul doesn’t normally take the bus. most of the time, he’s prepared to simply walk anywhere he needs to go! he has two good legs, after all, and he loves to see the scenery. loves to feel the sun on his face, or the breeze in his hair. even if it takes a little longer, the journey is worth it to him. however ---- normally, chul also doesn’t have a bandaged knee. it happened while he was leading around one of the bigger dogs from work and they got a bit too excited, tugging him so hard on their leash that he toppled right over. a bruise formed almost instantly and he’s pretty sure he might’ve sprained something, as getting around has been more difficult ever since. until it heals, chul thinks that taking the bus where he needs to go would be the better option when he’s able. ( he’s already tried soldiering through the pain and it didn’t do him much good; possibly ending with some tears, definitely ending with defeat. ) 

the only problem is, well --- sometimes the seats are all used up. today happens to be one of those days, and he can already feel his leg wobbling from a hard day’s work as he clambers up the steps and takes in his surroundings, reaching out to grab one of the steadying pulleys from up top. 

or, well. he was going to.