THIS JUST IN: BIG BEE

i love entomology related articles tbh, i feel like a good number of them have funny jokes or poke fun at themselves in the headers. My personal favorite was the namib dune spider article i read:

They aren’t so much a nightmare as they are a dissheveled and kind of sleepy-looking insectoid college student, down to the oversized and kind of dingy Mothra shirt and messy bun. They are VERY LARGE, and their tail wraps around the corner. The short one doesn’t seem so pleased to see them, and they shrug it off. Eh, whatever, he’s probably scared of bugs or something. The big one doesn’t seem half as bothered, though, and they’re almost shocked over the fact that he seems to have three arms, but, well, they’ve seen worse, and a New Friend is never a bad thing. They smile at him, and look back over his shoulder, smiling at the small one also, but, y’know, no hands.

Brenton squints with his one visible eye at Shi’s… lower half, seeming to be in a mixed state of confusion, distress, and mild revulsion. Admittedly, it’s not too surprising coming from someone who both smells like a candle obsessed old lady and looks like one hell of a dandy. They’re probably grossed out by the sheer concept of insects. Either way, he makes no motion to get from behind his larger ‘friend’.

They give Squilliam Fancyson over here quite the same look. If he wants to come into their house, break their (admittedly quite shitty) pottery, and then look at them like they’re some sort of gross bug and nothing else, he is absolutely getting the stink eye. All eight of them. With a loud TKTKTKTKTKKT noise, they scutter the rest of their huge ass into the hallway, wrapping themself up like a massive, armor-plated snake. They make it a point to yawn exaggeratedly, mouth splitting all the way down their neck, huge, sharp jaws very clearly twitching in their throat. Wanna get gross, bub? They’ll show ya gross. They mumble an only half-serious “oh, excuse me” after their face returns to normal. They turn back to the Large One, a friendly smile on their face.

Huh. Two people, maybe? Weird. How’d they even get in? Shi walks down the hallway, a box of pins still in their hand. Their legs make a lot of tick-tick-tick noises on the tile, sounding like someone drumming their fingers, if that person had about forty fingers and very long nails. 

Brenton freezes, snapping his head towards the approaching sounds, feeling oddly threatened by whatever it is. The thing approaching honestly sounds like some sort of nightmare, and he makes quick work to move behind Clarence; who of course, doesn’t even notice the noise.

They aren’t so much a nightmare as they are a dissheveled and kind of sleepy-looking insectoid college student, down to the oversized and kind of dingy Mothra shirt and messy bun. They are VERY LARGE, and their tail wraps around the corner. The short one doesn’t seem so pleased to see them, and they shrug it off. Eh, whatever, he’s probably scared of bugs or something. The big one doesn’t seem half as bothered, though, and they’re almost shocked over the fact that he seems to have three arms, but, well, they’ve seen worse, and a New Friend is never a bad thing. They smile at him, and look back over his shoulder, smiling at the small one also, but, y’know, no hands.

They were in the middle of pinning some of their extensive backlog of dead bugs, when they hear a loud noise from outside. Huh? Shep might have knocked something with his tail. Hm…there was a yell, too, but that doesn’t sound like Shep. They put down the big blue weevil they were working on, and skitter out into the hallway. They are in their pajamas and they look an absolute mess.

This happened very rarely, these days. Clarence used to be prone to randomly teleporting, but he was pretty good at going back to where he was as soon as he got somewhere weird. Sometimes it led to uncomfortable situations. These days, though, he’s had it under wraps. Today, though. He didn’t know where he was, not even in the slightest, and of course, this time, he brought someone with him.

Huh. Two people, maybe? Weird. How’d they even get in? Shi walks down the hallway, a box of pins still in their hand. Their legs make a lot of tick-tick-tick noises on the tile, sounding like someone drumming their fingers, if that person had about forty fingers and very long nails. 

chaetae

They were in the middle of pinning some of their extensive backlog of dead bugs, when they hear a loud noise from outside. Huh? Shep might have knocked something with his tail. Hm...there was a yell, too, but that doesn’t sound like Shep. They put down the big blue weevil they were working on, and skitter out into the hallway. They are in their pajamas and they look an absolute mess.