I was pent against of the the wall biting down hard on my bottom lip as Chrisâ large manly hands pleased my body, one hand gripping on my thick yet firm ass and the other under my shirt pinching my hard nipples. My body was heating up, my breathing soon grew heavy and honestly, my pussy had been wet since he picked me up after our kiss. Although it felt good, I couldnât help but mentally remind myself that Iâm a happily married woman and Chris is not my husband.
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So, this is a new blog feature that will probably happen every other week. The Feedback Drive is a way to make sure fanfics donât go unnoticed. Itâs a way for fanfics to get discovered and get feedback
So hereâs how it works:
-If youâd like to participate, you will  send me your name/ fanfic through Ask
-Then, using a randomized decision, we will give each person a fanfic for the weekend.
-On Friday, you will read a few chapters of the fanfic you were assigned and then leave feedback ANONYMOUSLY and repeat the same thing Saturday, read chapters and repeat ANONYMOUSLY
-On Sunday, you will read a few chapters and leave feedback and then tell the writer who you were. Then you will reblog your favorite chapters from them.
Everyone who volunteers will have someone reading their fanfic and leaving feedback.
If you have any questions feel free to ask me on this blog or my other two blogs @timeless-ff @thelastcallousff
Itâs not a Chris ff but Iâm writing again. Shout out to my new muse, Keith Powers (and also Woody, full woody ff will be up this spring)
Tape You will be finished in the spring. I found some files from my old pc (the one that got stolen hellas ago and made me quit writing this) so yay!!!!!!! This blog is officially active again.
Love y'all and thanks for not unfollowing me during my writing hiatus. Even if you donât fw Chris anymore (my interests have totally waned but I canât abandon my characterization) I appreciate it soooo much for still fuckin w me.
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Cylia:
Thereâs are some some people youâve just got to love from distance.
We stood across from each other not saying a word but our eyes were telling a story by looking at each other. He looks good like he always does.  Tears already left my eyes while I tried wiping them so no more could fall.
He try so hard to not show his emotions, but we both knew how he really is. I put my bag on the bed while music was blasting from downstairs. Both of us decided to come to this get together since his mom plan on having it. I knew he didnât know I was coming, so I didnât want to be rude.
âAll this bullshit right now.â He spoke first while starring at me. Â "We had everything but shit changed a lot.â
My blood was boiling that I wanted to slap the shit out of him because what he saying was true between us. Both of us couldnât believe this was ever be REAL or NON-EXISTED.
"Chris you and I both fucking changed. We both wasnât with the shit we did to each other anymore.â I spat staring right back at him. âOur love for one another fucked up and never exist again.â
Chris shakes his head while his hand ball up into a fist like he wanted to punch something. âWhat you wanted me to do huh? You canât force this situation on me for the rest of your life!â I added, yelling at him. âWe both knew what the fuck we were doing and it didnât work anymore.â
âBullshit, our love didnât-â He paused, Â hearing the Kidd running into the room. âDaddy, Daddy.â We heard Ella and Gideon voice.
âHey babies.â Chris smile, picking them both up in his arms holding them. He kissed their cheeks. âDaddy, misses you.â
âWe mesw you too.â Gideon try to speak making us laugh a little. âMommy!â Ella face lightens up when she saw me.
I walk up to them kissing their cheeks while Chris looked at me. Smiling, I pinch their cheeks and said. âYou guys staying with daddy tonight.â
âYay.â They both yelled.
Chris and I laugh, shaking our heads. I was going to say something else, but we heard two people called our names.
âChris!â A girl voice said.
âCylia!â I heard my mom called me.
I sigh kissing their cheeks before walking away going out the door until Chris said something. âI love you always Cylia.â I sniffle headed straight to my mom since she needed my help while hearing the kids giggles.
Iâll always love Chris but sometimes things get too intense, crazy and aggressive between us that maybe it is better if we left the situation behind us, Â we could learn how to deal with each other from a distance but I guess thatâs not how life works.
I was pent against of the the wall biting down hard on my bottom lip as Chrisâ large manly hands pleased my body, one hand gripping on my thick yet firm ass and the other under my shirt pinching my hard nipples. My body was heating up, my breathing soon grew heavy and honestly, my pussy had been wet since he picked me up after our kiss. Although it felt good, I couldn't help but mentally remind myself that I'm a happily married woman and Chris is not my husband.
âChris, baby I'm married,â I moaned weakly not sounding the least bit convincing.
âBut didn't you tell me he gave you a pass to cheat?â He spoke as he hands continued their venture of anatomy. âDon't tell me you used it already?â
âNo baby i have not,â I admitted honestly, my eyes opening up to connected with his.
âThen don't fight this feeling, we both know we've been wanting this since we met at your party and of course LA brought us together one more time,â he flashed me that almost blinding white smile as he allowed my feet to meet the ground. âHow about this, I got to do my interview while I'm doing that, you sit in here and do your boss lady thing, if you still want this when I am done, I'll take you on this little adventure, if not I'll respect it. Deal?â
âYes deal.â I nodded quickly appreciating his willingness to consider my readiness for this or lack thereof. Â
âOkay baby girl, give me a kiss,â He instructed to which I obeyed willfully. His lips melted into mine like perfection, my body grew warm all over again just from the tender kiss alone. Chris pulled his lips from mine with a satisfied smirk etched across his face. In that moment, I made my my decision..
Chris walked out like nothing had happened in my office with his cup of tea, completely normal. I got myself together as best as possible, I sat down on my desk in attempts to get some type of work done but it was no use. I ended up simply picking the top 5 DJâs qualified for the position and send them to HR to begin conducting interviews. I went through the final shots from what was left of my ivy park shoot and picked the shoot for the campaign as well as commercial. By the time I was finish making my choices I was getting a text from Chris.
Freckles: I'm outside in the car if you coming.
I quickly texted back letting him know I had a few more things to look over and to come to my office. I went back to looking over emails and images when my office door open once again. Chris picked up the chair sitting before my desk and sat it next to mine.
âSo assuming from the fact that you called me in here, that means weâre going on our little adventure once you're done?â
âThat is correct to assume,â I spoke with a smile.
âI hoped you'd come, I've been trying to get the opportunity to get to know you without all the extras but never really got the chance.â
âWell here you go,â I hummed sending off the final email and closing my laptop before putting it into its bag. âCome on, I want to see what you have in store for me.â I grabbed my purse and walked out of my office, Chris followed behind. I locked up my office and told everyone goodbye before we left the building. We got into the back seat of the car and Chris instructed the driver that we were leaving now.
âYou hungry baby girl?â
âYes.â
âCool, I know this place that makes bomb ass food we can have lunch there.â
When he said lunch I was quickly reminded that I was supposed to be meeting Odell for lunch today, âFuck, Odell, I was supposed to meet him for lunch.â
âWhy don't you text him and tell him we are having a business lunch?â
Damn this nigga is quick on his toes, âYouâre right I could do that.â I pulled out my phone from my purse to text Odell, just as I was typing the text about the âbusiness meetingâ, I decided it would be better to tell the truth.
Me: Raincheck? Saw Chris at the station, he wants to hang out & show me this burger place he swears by..
Deli Meat: Okay babe, that's fine we can hang out another time, we have to fly out to Hawaii for the pro bowl tomorrow
Me: okay baby, see you a little later
I put my phone back in my purse and then put my seatbelt on. âSo where will we be doing?â
âSomewhere special.â
âNow is that so?â
âYes it is.â
âAnd where is it.â
âJust sit back and ride,â he instructed before planting a single kiss on my shoulder.
âWhatever, boyâ I said as I playfully rolled my eyes.
âI'm far from a boy and you know that.â
âI don't know that, yet.â I leaned in closely him whispering in his ear.
âBut you shall find out.â He winked.
âOh, is that so Mr. Brown?â
âAs I recall you almost found out when I had you hemmed up in your office.â
âI do not recall,â I spoke softly acting completely clueless.
Chris slid closer to her and kissed on her neck. âOh really?â
âYes really,â I smirked.
âI guess I'll have to handle that then,â we pull up to a boating dock.
âI'm sure we would both love that.â the driver comes around and opens the door for me. Chris takes my hand and walks me down the short walk way to his boat. âWhy are we here?â
âThis is where we are having lunch.â He helps me onto the boat.
âOh alright,â I smile making my way into the boat.
âCan I get you anything to drink maâam?â The server asks.
âWhite wine please.â
âAnd for you Mr. Brown?â
âIâll have Hennessey on the rocks please.â The waiter turns to leave with our orders. I show you around the boat and take you to where we will be eating.
âThis is very nice Chris,â
âThank you I've had it for a while. I don't get to use it much so I bought it be nice to break it out today.â
âLook at you trying to impress me,â I giggled at the thought.
âMaybe.â He winks and pulls u close to him.
âYou are being real frisky today.â
âBut u like it.â
âI will admit, it is quite appealing,â
âWell let's go order some food so I can continue to be frisky.â
âI want seafood.â
âYou can order whatever you want my personal chef has almost everything.â The waiter comes to the table just as we sat down.
âFor you maâam?â
âIâd like lobster and shrimp.â The waiter took both our orders and went to give them to the chef. While we waited we enjoyed our drinks and had intimate conversation updating one another on our lives, getting to know each other really. It was definitely a change from my current situation, just good food and conversations, no worries or expectations to be perfect or seemingly so. Not that I didnât love what she had with Odell, itâs just that our relationship has had quite a lot going on since the very beginning so I always had to be on my toes wondering what surprise or new problem was waiting for me around the corner but this was nothing like that. It was relieving to have adult conversation where no one was judging me or relying on me to fix or mend anything. Once we were done eating, we went to the cabin on the boat and cuddled for what felt like hours until I drifted off to sleep. The sleep was peaceful, the type of sleep you get every once in a while.
âSo what are we exactly?â Arthur spoke softly being awaken from  sleep to the sound of her frantically moving around his room in search of her clothes which were scattered around his bedroom from last nightâs adventure. She had accidentally stayed the night, it was about four am so he assumed she woke up to text messages from her. He and Tanya had been doing this every single friday and saturday for the last six months, going out to dinner then proceeding to Arthurâs place but this time they had gotten swept with the intimacy of it all, falling asleep with her in his arms. Although this relationship was supposed to be a bit more contractual, the two had started developing feelings for one another. He was a married man with children a few years younger than her, which she did not know so he knew she could not be his one and only, he just want to hear it from her. They talked every single day, went on dates at least twice a week, he spoiled her like no other giving her anything she desired or needed, even paying her bills but a relationship status had yet to be stated. Normally he  wouldnât even bother to ask but these feelings had clouded his judgement.
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YepâŠ. she legit said âif you go to church you wonât be depressed, I wasnât depressed when my daddy died, I wasnât depressed when my friends died⊠you have no reason to be depressed or unhappyâ
My response: âoh. k.â
At that point I wanted to be left alone and didnât want her to say anything to me. Still donât. Yet she always say, âthat hurt meâ GIRL BYE đđđthis is why I donât tell you ANYTHING. Whether itâs my love life or my personal life period. I donât bring friends by to meet her or nothing look wtf she saying to me? Nope
Sounds like my mom like I was literally 19 smack dab in the middle of a nervous breakdown/quarter life crisis and told her how much I hated school and how depressed I was and she told me âeveryone hates schoolâ repeatedly and sat silent! So tried to talk to dad got a similar reaction saying âitâs
Not about youâ Now that Iâm older her and my father wonder why I donât talk to them about shit and Iâm like y'all set the standard for that because I tried to come to you guys SEVERAL TIMES and it was nothing but hell for me
Yep. Several things are wrong with me I can acknowledge it. Some things far as things in my child hood, certain predators and other things - my father knew and suspicion. My dad knew depression because he endured it, he dealt with so much as a child that he wanted to shield from us so even though he was a tough man. He wouldnât have treated mental illness the way my mom does. One reason I miss him as badly as I do, I love my mom donât get my wrong but I canât go any further in my adulthood speaking to her. The day she becomes a grandmother she will be around but not as around as my grandmother. My grandmother is actually more understanding than she is. She legit has asked me, âare you depressed? Whatâs going on?â
âAsk your daughter.â Is all I can give for response I swear Iâm not gonna be like this as a parent. Not to mention my little cousins are unhappy and being mistreated/dealing with my controlling auntâŠ. everyone else thinks they arenât depressed but the youngest cousin she was self harming a few years agoâŠ.(about 2-3 years) so when they were all confused Iâm like y'all are really fucking blindâŠ.
Sounds like my family like my dad says âyou put too much pressure on yourself, what are you depressed for?â And itâs like when you say shit like that of course I donât want to talk about it. I havenât been myself for months and my parents never noticed! And itâs hard not to take it personally cause itâs like my sister could be having a bad day and everyone in the house is catering to her but Iâm having an episode for MONTHS, practically losing my mind, crying in my car cause I have no at home support and they wonder why I donât really fuck with them and why Iâm so eager to move out! Like Jesus Iâm just trying to save myself from my clearly untreated mental illness and passive aggressive family life
Why is this pattern though? Like itâs the same for me tbh. I donât really talk to much of anybody because my mom has set this standard of no one cares you just gotta suck it up. Iâve always been intimated to speak about how I feel or if I was feeling depressed because people would either cut me off or say you donât really feel that way itâs just a phase. But lord if itâs about them the whole world comes crashing down -.-. Thatâs why I donât call any family members really for anything cause theyâll repeat what I said it just too much man.
Iâve noticed in the black community mental illness isnât really taken as seriously which is sad. And I have a lot of that happening where I canât tell my mom something cause then it will be the butt of someoneâs joke later or the topic of discussion
Itâs like they donât think it can happen to us when it can and it does. Black peoples donât want to acknowledge it maybe because they donât know how, or they just donât want to Iâm not sure which one it is.
YepâŠ. she legit said âif you go to church you wonât be depressed, I wasnât depressed when my daddy died, I wasnât depressed when my friends died⊠you have no reason to be depressed or unhappyâ
My response: âoh. k.â
At that point I wanted to be left alone and didnât want her to say anything to me. Still donât. Yet she always say, âthat hurt meâ GIRL BYE đđđthis is why I donât tell you ANYTHING. Whether itâs my love life or my personal life period. I donât bring friends by to meet her or nothing look wtf she saying to me? Nope
Sounds like my mom like I was literally 19 smack dab in the middle of a nervous breakdown/quarter life crisis and told her how much I hated school and how depressed I was and she told me âeveryone hates schoolâ repeatedly and sat silent! So tried to talk to dad got a similar reaction saying âitâs
Not about youâ Now that Iâm older her and my father wonder why I donât talk to them about shit and Iâm like y'all set the standard for that because I tried to come to you guys SEVERAL TIMES and it was nothing but hell for me
Yep. Several things are wrong with me I can acknowledge it. Some things far as things in my child hood, certain predators and other things - my father knew and suspicion. My dad knew depression because he endured it, he dealt with so much as a child that he wanted to shield from us so even though he was a tough man. He wouldnât have treated mental illness the way my mom does. One reason I miss him as badly as I do, I love my mom donât get my wrong but I canât go any further in my adulthood speaking to her. The day she becomes a grandmother she will be around but not as around as my grandmother. My grandmother is actually more understanding than she is. She legit has asked me, âare you depressed? Whatâs going on?â
âAsk your daughter.â Is all I can give for response I swear Iâm not gonna be like this as a parent. Not to mention my little cousins are unhappy and being mistreated/dealing with my controlling auntâŠ. everyone else thinks they arenât depressed but the youngest cousin she was self harming a few years agoâŠ.(about 2-3 years) so when they were all confused Iâm like y'all are really fucking blindâŠ.
Sounds like my family like my dad says âyou put too much pressure on yourself, what are you depressed for?â And itâs like when you say shit like that of course I donât want to talk about it. I havenât been myself for months and my parents never noticed! And itâs hard not to take it personally cause itâs like my sister could be having a bad day and everyone in the house is catering to her but Iâm having an episode for MONTHS, practically losing my mind, crying in my car cause I have no at home support and they wonder why I donât really fuck with them and why Iâm so eager to move out! Like Jesus Iâm just trying to save myself from my clearly untreated mental illness and passive aggressive family life
Why is this pattern though? Like itâs the same for me tbh. I donât really talk to much of anybody because my mom has set this standard of no one cares you just gotta suck it up. Iâve always been intimated to speak about how I feel or if I was feeling depressed because people would either cut me off or say you donât really feel that way itâs just a phase. But lord if itâs about them the whole world comes crashing down -.-. Thatâs why I donât call any family members really for anything cause theyâll repeat what I said it just too much man.
Iâve noticed in the black community mental illness isnât really taken as seriously which is sad. And I have a lot of that happening where I can't tell my mom something cause then it will be the butt of someoneâs joke later or the topic of discussion
Whatâs worse Iâm not even depressed about not being out about my sexuality. I am content with keeping that away from my family honestly because theyâre all shit starters and they talk too much, they always fighting then let all this tension build up yet when Iâm honest and say who wrong or what is wrong about shit they all get mad. My family thinks itâs okay fornother family members to use and enable manipulation, enable mistreatment. Fuck that boy⊠my kids ainât gonna be apart of this. My daddyâs family who is full of inner turmoil among his siblings long before his death are less FUCKED up than my momâs side.
Iâm the only one who sees my 16/17 year old cousins are suffering from depression and anxiety⊠Iâve been hard on them but never ever down playing what could be wrongâŠ. Iâm a praying person but this family just⊠it irritates me. I wanna move FAR AWAY
Like if I wasnât in the middle of finishing school with just a few classes left I would legit be in the military by now. Thatâs my only escape as far as I can see
It is and their opinion wonât change. I hate to sound like Iâm whining because I know most people feel like I am but nobody can live in a situation like this. My kids canât be apart of this and itâs sad that teenagers are plotting to leave after high schoolâŠ. with no savings just wanting to leave but I support their decision, I told my cousins if they get a job, to not allow their mother to drain their finances. They have to put as much aside as possible. But itâs like I donât wanna make a mistake get in a dire financial situation I canât get out of before I move
I can completely relate to that and itâs not whining, you are being honestly about your situation. yes some will say âoh some have it worseâ which is true but it is still just as damaging. Not wanting to put myself more in the hole financial is the only reason I still live here cause when I move out I dont want to have to come back, you know?
Whatâs worse Iâm not even depressed about not being out about my sexuality. I am content with keeping that away from my family honestly because theyâre all shit starters and they talk too much, they always fighting then let all this tension build up yet when Iâm honest and say who wrong or what is wrong about shit they all get mad. My family thinks itâs okay fornother family members to use and enable manipulation, enable mistreatment. Fuck that boy⊠my kids ainât gonna be apart of this. My daddyâs family who is full of inner turmoil among his siblings long before his death are less FUCKED up than my momâs side.
Iâm the only one who sees my 16/17 year old cousins are suffering from depression and anxiety⊠Iâve been hard on them but never ever down playing what could be wrongâŠ. Iâm a praying person but this family just⊠it irritates me. I wanna move FAR AWAY
Like if I wasnât in the middle of finishing school with just a few classes left I would legit be in the military by now. Thatâs my only escape as far as I can see
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YepâŠ. she legit said âif you go to church you wonât be depressed, I wasnât depressed when my daddy died, I wasnât depressed when my friends died⊠you have no reason to be depressed or unhappyâ
My response: âoh. k.â
At that point I wanted to be left alone and didnât want her to say anything to me. Still donât. Yet she always say, âthat hurt meâ GIRL BYE đđđthis is why I donât tell you ANYTHING. Whether itâs my love life or my personal life period. I donât bring friends by to meet her or nothing look wtf she saying to me? Nope
Sounds like my mom like I was literally 19 smack dab in the middle of a nervous breakdown/quarter life crisis and told her how much I hated school and how depressed I was and she told me âeveryone hates schoolâ repeatedly and sat silent! So tried to talk to dad got a similar reaction saying âitâs
Not about youâ Now that Iâm older her and my father wonder why I donât talk to them about shit and Iâm like y'all set the standard for that because I tried to come to you guys SEVERAL TIMES and it was nothing but hell for me
Yep. Several things are wrong with me I can acknowledge it. Some things far as things in my child hood, certain predators and other things - my father knew and suspicion. My dad knew depression because he endured it, he dealt with so much as a child that he wanted to shield from us so even though he was a tough man. He wouldnât have treated mental illness the way my mom does. One reason I miss him as badly as I do, I love my mom donât get my wrong but I canât go any further in my adulthood speaking to her. The day she becomes a grandmother she will be around but not as around as my grandmother. My grandmother is actually more understanding than she is. She legit has asked me, âare you depressed? Whatâs going on?â
âAsk your daughter.â Is all I can give for response I swear Iâm not gonna be like this as a parent. Not to mention my little cousins are unhappy and being mistreated/dealing with my controlling auntâŠ. everyone else thinks they arenât depressed but the youngest cousin she was self harming a few years agoâŠ.(about 2-3 years) so when they were all confused Iâm like y'all are really fucking blindâŠ.
Sounds like my family like my dad says "you put too much pressure on yourself, what are you depressed for?" And it's like when you say shit like that of course I don't want to talk about it. I haven't been myself for months and my parents never noticed! And it's hard not to take it personally cause it's like my sister could be having a bad day and everyone in the house is catering to her but I'm having an episode for MONTHS, practically losing my mind, crying in my car cause I have no at home support and they wonder why I don't really fuck with them and why I'm so eager to move out! Like Jesus I'm just trying to save myself from my clearly untreated mental illness and passive aggressive family life
Whatâs worse Iâm not even depressed about not being out about my sexuality. I am content with keeping that away from my family honestly because theyâre all shit starters and they talk too much, they always fighting then let all this tension build up yet when Iâm honest and say who wrong or what is wrong about shit they all get mad. My family thinks itâs okay fornother family members to use and enable manipulation, enable mistreatment. Fuck that boy⊠my kids ainât gonna be apart of this. My daddyâs family who is full of inner turmoil among his siblings long before his death are less FUCKED up than my momâs side.
Iâm the only one who sees my 16/17 year old cousins are suffering from depression and anxiety⊠Iâve been hard on them but never ever down playing what could be wrongâŠ. Iâm a praying person but this family just⊠it irritates me. I wanna move FAR AWAY
