shane is such a “shaking a handful of trail mix in his hand and periodically popping some in his mouth” dad while ilya is a “eating an apple slice by slice with a knife” dad
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shane is such a “shaking a handful of trail mix in his hand and periodically popping some in his mouth” dad while ilya is a “eating an apple slice by slice with a knife” dad

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Someone talk to me about how crazy the foreplay at the cottage must go because they have TIME. Shane was genuinely under the impression that foreplay was ten minutes TOPS, just some making out and usually mouth stuff. It must have rearranged his entire atomic structure the first time Ilya pulled him between his thighs on the couch and ran his palms up and down the inside of Shane's thighs and sucked soft kisses onto his neck and just murmured, "Shh," when Shane tried to escalate.
Consider Shane just going soft and buzzy and pliant as Ilya moves a hand over the bulge in his jeans, a brief and tender touch, and then draws his fingers up to Shane's stomach, which jumps as he laughs and moans.
"Don't you wanna fuck me, baby?" Shane finally mumbles when this has gone on for a while.
"Always," Ilya replies, like he's making a vow, and Shane shivers. "Let me turn you on, sweetheart."
"I am," Shane whines.
Ilya doesn't quite know how to explain to Shane that there are levels of arousal that can come from long moments, hours even, of touch. Arousal that builds from wandering hands and curious lips and whispered secrets. Sex that feels like summiting a mountain together rather than a race to the top. He thinks that Shane, with his yoga and his careful self-discipline would find it absolutely enthralling to discover that they can build something like that inside his body together.
Ilya doesn't have the words to explain these things, because some of them are desires so deep inside himself that he's only just uncovering them. So he kisses under Shane's ear, and lets him wiggle and whine, and draws his hands over his thighs again, over his clothes, keeping him warm and happy and tingling and floaty.
And he shows him.
i know i am probably the most vocal objector to the OutrageouslyUnrealisticEpisodeFiveLookBackInjury, so this comes as no great shock to my hothockituents to say, bUT, i think it would have been so much more powerful to have the injury be a bad case of Being Boarded.
not just for the fact that noted hockey legend shane hollander has never 'gotten his bell rung' before in his entire life of playing hockey and he would Not be turning around in the neutral zone while in possession of the puck bc clearly, he knows how to skate. he's wicked fast with stickhandling and would be so used to avoiding targeted hits from his uhm, entire career of people targeting him.
but ALSO for the fact that we know from the fuck montage/rose game contrast that boarding is foreplay to shane and ilya. their preferred on ice bodily interaction actually. and the Lusty Implications of shane getting fucked up by ilya's bestie via hollanov's preferred on-ice foreplay AND shane potentially having to work through some post-injury somatic confusion of big hits against the boards, are sooooooooo juicy 🥭💦 like show me what happens their first game after that when ilya boards shane. and shane sorta makes this wrangled wrenched deep sound and ilya jerks his head over to look at shane bc ilya has Sexily Cataloged all the Hurt Shane Sounds that exist and this is new and shane is like. simultaneously having a lil somatic flashyback and exhaling through it, same as he's done w other injuries, and also shane is thinking. god, that kinda scared me what the fuck and i am so fucking horny what the fuck why was that so fucking hot 🥴🔥
yeah that's my emotional support sketching therapy
Tysm to @ilyasmole for comming these two with Pershanemon and Dillya! Look at em!
You can get your own Shanes, Ilyas, or anybody else through my vgen!

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Play This One Simple Song To Unlock Carter Vaughn’s Bicurious Secret
ilya rozanov voice (speeding in his faggy orange lamborghini aventador) im a bitch im a lover im a child im a mother im a sinner im a saint i do not feel ashamed im your hell im your dream there’s nothing in between you know you wouldn’t want it any other way
no, you suck my dick
shane and ilya are featured in an nhl q&a compilation video with other great hockey players. the question was “who’s the player that makes you the happiest?” and shane answers without hesitation, expressionless “ilya rozanov”. then ilya’s cut comes next and he answers “there’s a player who isn’t as good me, but sometimes he makes me happy, not as much as i make others happy, but he tries. it’s zane boodram”.
I'm just so excited to see them smile at eachother and the way they make eachother laugh honestly. Like the CCM photoshoot was really a sign for the rest of their lives. Like they see eachother and they start smiling and no one makes them laugh like the other one and I just wanna recenter that

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one of my favorite calvin and hobbes strips of all time. need to preserve it on my blog
hudson williams is a huge bug.....but shane hollander is a lil bug...........so it depends
they’re hanging out with their friends somewhere and someone brings up the topic of finding love again after losing a partner. most of them agreeing that they would wish their partner to find someone new. and a new oblivious wag notices that shane and ilya haven’t spoken and asks “what about you two?” and cassie cuts off and says to the girl “do not concern yourself with them, those two are crazy about each other, they’ll probably die together in their sleep at old age” and caitlin adds “the probability of them finding a way to immortality is bigger than them finding someone else”. and shane and ilya just having a silent conversation with their eyes “don’t you ever dare”
we all talk about how shane making space for ilya at the cottage and inviting him there and how significant it was for shanes safe space to become their safe space but sometimes thinking about shanes summers there before make me feel so sad. his only way of finding peace was total isolation, sure he probably saw his parents a lot, and his friends too if they were nearby, but just think of how much time he spent just completely Alone, only able to be himself in his fortress of solitude, there was probably peace in it, but it must have been so lonely, he wasnt out partying and distracting himself, he only had his off season routine and his thoughts to keep hin company, just shane alone in that giant cottage he custom built with no one to share it
this is insanely racist and I haven't even seen much about this online yet
after Bad Bunny won they added a Latin song category and after Rosé got three nominations the grammys added a k-pop/c-pop/j-pop category they have always been afraid of well-performing artists of color challenging white artists in mainstream categories
the grammys always had the "real grammys" where anglo artists performed and won and then the "latin grammys" for latinos which never got any real coverage like the main event did and most people don't even know exists. it's worse

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me trying to convince myself that the whole spectrum of human emotions is a good and necessary thing to feel even if its not comfortable while im actively experiencing emotions that make me feel like my bones are being dissolved in acid
thinking about ilya kissing shane's hand over and over during the drive to his parents' house. gomez addams ass romantic ass loverboy ass