Dancing White Shadows

Shelby felt her struggle only intensify, it would have been at this moment she’d have called her mother, maybe even Carrie, even if she could feel her older sister lingering in the doorway of the guestroom, sensing the younger demons struggle to keep it together- creatures that were most certainly victims of their emotions. “No you didn’t have to come back and I am glad you did, I am…I just…I’m in so much pain from this, from the fact you just so nonchalantly came here expecting me to jump on you” she tried through clenched teeth. When Cassandra then spoke again, the demons eyes widened at her choice of wording, even if spoke easily it was still a command and she couldn’t refuse it, her body fighting her on it and making her blurt out a random compliment “Credit? Well um…You have beautiful hair and eyes…” she then shook her head snarling “Oh for fuck sake!” she snapped.

  “I know you are...but I thought I could start to try and take that pain away...” Within, Cassandra was kicking herself. It was such a cliche, and emotional thing to say, something she had recently lacked since leaving. The spoken words almost made her want to vomit, but it was true. If Cassandra cared about anyone, it was first, Shelby. “Wait..---whoa there, did you just basically tell me I’m pretty?” A sly smirk curled at the woman’s lips. She was pleased, to say the least. The dance lifted herself from the couch and moved her dainty feet over to the brunette. “You’re off to a good start...” --as if Shelby was the one who needed to make up for something...”Oh, c’mon, don’t be shy now, tell me more.” Her blond lashes fluttered at her wife. 

Shelby felt her back giving a sharp crack as she became angrier, it only fueled that side to her that seemed to relish in it, Shelby felt her vision became spotty through her now blood red eyes, she supported herself against the mantel piece, her black nails now sharp and claw like that she pulled her sweater sleeves down over her hands to try and hide them. She gritted her teeth, fangs begging to just click themselves out right there and then “Figures they all ran off….” she stammered, turning away so she could hide her eyes and her fangs that eventually gave in and showed themselves. “Two weeks, TWO FUCKING WEEKS…” She snapped, lividly shouting to the wall now rather than the blonde. “Do you realise how that makes me feel? I knew I could fucking sense something…I could probably feel my world shifting when you stepped off that plane, like someone walking over a grave.”

  It was becoming a habit, rolling her eyes to every startled word that came out of Shelby’s mouth. She didn’t know what else to say, everything was upset to the other woman, and quite frankly Cass couldn’t handle this heavy weighted emotion. It was making her uncomfortable, and the taste for liquor only became a stronger craving. “I didn’t have to come back.” Lips dry, Cassandra spoke in a more subtle tone than the one Shelby was using. “I chose to, because I missed you. We’re fucking married, you know?” Blond brows scrunched tightly together as her hands waved within the air. “Should I have just stayed away forever?--I know it was....probably not a good decision, leaving, but wasn’t it the best decision for me to come back? Jesus, Shelby, I’m trying. Give me some credit, please, before you suck all of the air out of this place completely.”

She needed a drink, but her eyes were becoming too foggy with Shelby’s anger, that she chose to sit down instead. Sitting in the foreign chair, Cassandra didn’t dare lean back in it only knowing what had happened in the very spot she sat. Her imagination could guess. “Please, Dalton ran off with his sister.” Her eyes rolled as her hand waved in the air. “He’s good though.” She nodded. “Ellie? Jesus, I can’t keep up with these morons, seriously Shelby..I don’t know where she’s at. I thought Dalton said something about being with her mom, but I don’t know---and I could care less.” She sighed out nibbling at her lip. The biting slowed down as she cursed beneath her breath having let her time stamp slip. “Two weeks....” It was true. “I didn’t know how to tell you?? I don’t do this.. this confrontation over feelings...and whatnot ...it’s gross, and uncomfortable...I needed to breathe...knowing this wasn’t going to be a patch of roses.”

Shelby hissed when she heard Carrie yell something in the Verbis Diablo, the brunette slowly beginning to pick up on the forgotten language, her eyes then fixing on Cassandra again “Well I would have thought you’d know that since you were the one who took them with you” Shelby said bitterly, missing Alexis and Ryder greatly, even if it had been a hard time of seeing them as her own, much like it was still difficult with Rachel when she was actually her blood. Shelby sat herself down, her legs shaky and just begging to buckle beneath her “Oh sure…Just ditch the woman that loved you so you could go back to all night partying and sleeping with whoever you pleased. But you know…The funny thing about being married to a person is that those conversations should come easily, no matter how much ego is stuffed up your ass Cassandra….” Shelby growled, grasping a handful of her own hair, her sharpening nails digging into her scalp.

  “Come on, give me that lecture I haven’t heard from Jesus and all of his servants already. Seriously, bring it, but you should know through this skin of steal, I feel guilty, yeah, sure, I do.” The woman paced around the coffee table unable to watch her wife have a mental breakdown. She couldn’t stand settled with all the emotions she had caused within Shelby, but she too felt all of them- even if she didn’t show it. “Trust me, I shut everyone out. Dalton, little Schwimmer, even Holly.” Her eye lids closed momentarily..she was filled with guilt, but wouldn’t let it wear on her. “The kids are four now. Full of spunk. Ryder is incredible...like this little energized, strong kid with no fear...and Alexis loves to dance. I took them to my first class back at NYADA last week. They love it, but they ask about you. They’ve always asked about you, and maybe that’s a huge reason why I came back to this dump. If you want to be their mother, like you are, I want you to see them.”

“You’re already arrested into my arms- too cheesy?” Holly laughed, keeping her grip, almost curious to see if she could break her bestie, she then pulled back anyway and smirked at her “Well you could but I don’t think anything I did in return would be very PG-13 now would it?” she teased “So why the sudden return? I’m curious to interview the illustrious Cassandra July on her return from the big game” she smirked. 

  “Not cheesy enough,” Cassie laughed, though anyone else who made such comments would be loaded with isults resulting in them being a grade A moron. Holly was different, the blond brought out a more light, and playful side to the dancer. “God, now I want some damn wine.” She correlated with the cheese comment. “We only handle with Rated R, missy.” Cass loomed her eyes in Holly’s direction. “Jesus, it would be a failed interview as I seem to be the most hated person around here. What’s up with all these people with sticks up there asses. So I left..so what. It was just a vacation.” she shrugged. 

  “If I had a chicken leg, I would throw it at you right now, but it seems by the size of your ass, and god!- those thighs, you’ve eaten all of them...in the world.” She teased back slightly irritated by the girls comment, but all in all, it was something she had missed about Rachel. “Did you eat honey boo boo...I mean seriously, Berry...” She poked at the girl even more just to get her edge off. “I wasn’t ever one for love....people don’t change, all that jazz right?” She glazed over not wanting to talk about anything that related to her feelings. 

Shelby felt her claws pierce her palms, blood beginning to run and collect between her fingers, but she refused to give in, this was exactly what her newer side craved for- to overcome the normal sweetness and be taken over by dark. “You are selfish…You just stopped caring” she whispered, before audibly sighing as Carrie too puffed out her chest, Carrie stalked over seeing into the blondes mind and smirking at it “Not a lot in here is there?” Carrie mused and gave a cat like growl at her “You wish I was screwing your wife, at least that you’d be able to comprehend and understand in your tiny mind. ” she warned, before Shelby yanked her back, the brunette giving a squawk of surprise at her little sisters action. “Carrie leave it, I just cleaned this place up” she hissed to her, Having three sisters, Rachel, Evangeline and Mia there under one roof was too much, she was thankful that Jezebeth and Phoenix had wandered off causing trouble elsewhere, at least Carrie by herself could be controlled without having to display bravado in front of her other siblings. “Wow, a human with a bee in her bonnet, your kind are always the most fun to spill blood of” Carrie snarled when Cass sassed her, although oddly intrigued by it. “Carrie go! Get out, scat!” Shelby hissed pushing her sister out of the room, curses in another language from Carrie as she was pushed out the older demon trying to hold onto the door-frame like a petulant child. After a few moments Shelby came back over to Cass and folded her arms. “Maybe there isn’t anything to really carry on? Because I can’t understand your mind set Cassandra. how you would just return here after all this time thinking all is well, that I would run back into your arms…You know full well what it’s like for me to be abandoned and yet you did it anyway?

  Cassandra broke out a small laugh as the spitfire of a woman tried to intimidate her. It didn’t pinch the blonds ego in the slightest, but only left a smirk at her lips, and an exaggerated roll of her eyes. “Carry on?” The dancer wasn’t one for expressing her emotions. Though there was a time when she had opened up completely to Shelby and let them pour to the woman, but Shelby was right--things were different now. “Don’t we have...children?” She asked with a quirk of her brow thinking it would be the obvious reason to come back, even if Cass hadn’t carried the responsibility when she abruptly left. “You know me.” She shrugged with a heavy sigh feeling uncomfortable by the entire situation. “I couldn’t breathe, I had to go. I had to. I needed to get a taste of what everything was like again when I had aspirations, and dreams...not tying myself to help some wacko’s at an insane asylum. I might as well have taught to the senior living...and teaching...I needed to get out there again, Shelby.--and did you ever think for a second that maybe it was too hard for me to have that conversation with you? To say goodbye to you? To leave and what....have a skype marriage?”

  Emotionally stunted, Cassandra’s lips tugged upwards in a smirk as Shelby’s voice raged. Surely she hurt for the woman she loved, but Cassandra had built her attitude back up and didn’t quite know how to handle the situation appropriately. The last thing she wanted to do was open up. The thought of letting her feelings show made her want to gag herself. “A red carpet would do, yes.” Stubbornly she pursed her lips. “I’m selfish,” the dancer shrugged, “what’s new.” the eyes were becoming a nature to rolling. “Where are my--” Her voice was cut off by an intruding company. Hazel eyes shifted to the woman in the door way. Cass was pleased when she heard the comment about her legs, causing her shoulders to straighten, and her chest to puff out in an egotistical manner--she wasn’t afraid. “I’m sorry, who the hell are you? Last I took notice too I was having a conversation with Shelby, and you decided to stick your nose into a place where it didn’t belong---tell me you’re not screwing this idiot?” The blond shifted her eyes back to Shelby not having a clue that this woman was in fact her sister. “Are you screwing my wife?” Cassandra’s voice was now more firm as she pierced her eyes back to Carrie. “Quite frankly, I don’t give a damn in your label. I am more interested in the fact that you don’t have a role in this conversation. No guest starring Big Mouth. So please go crawl back to wherever irrelevant space you came from and let us carry on our conversation. It would be appreciated.”

   “I know, I know, I’m a selfish bitch. Arrest me.” She rolled her eyes before a wide smile broke her tight lipped expression. She was happy to see Holly, and her tightened arms around the woman proved just that. “Jesus, pull yourself together. I’m here, what do you want me to do, pinch you?”

       “I couldn’t let such a sweet Berry rot away.--Did your schnoz get bigger? Must be caught in a habit of lying..this is my way of saying it’s good to see your face. Take it or leave it...Hell, at least I got a damn smile out of you, your mother...not so much.--it could have something to do with me leaving her with our kids, but we won’t get into that.”

“You can’t be here. No, why are you here…Why now?” Shelby stammered as she stared at the blonde before her, unable to believe she would ever have actually laid eyes on her again. “You should have called-…” she whispered “Or just stayed away, it seems what you’ve been doing best lately, you made your intentions perfectly clear” She choked out, clenching her fists as her raised emotions made her nails that little bit more claw like.

  Confrontation wasn’t something Cassandra had ever been afraid of, but Shelby had found a way to break through that wall and make her slightly uneased beneath her skin. She knew it was only because she left so horribly. “It’s such a pleasure to see you too.” The blond rolled her eyes with a huff. She knew it wasn’t going to be the best face to face interaction. “Seriously, I thought there was going to be a big parade and flashing lights for Cassandra July coming back to town.--but C’mon, you love me.” She brushed past any deep emotion she had for the woman just to help clear the emotions Shelby was shooting at her. 

I really have not slept in two days. I feel like im the age of a much younger person. If you find me drooling on the floor of a hallway, just push my body to the side.

I am so glad I don't work at that clinic anymore because your unsanitary drooling would max out my gross level. I'd be more than afraid to push you to the side as if you had some zombified disease. Seriously, are you foaming at the mouth? I have a sense of humor of course, I understand after having two little tikes keeping me up all the time. I barely sleep. So if you're not sleeping now, don't bother ever having kids. You'd definitely become a zombie then.