to our eternity

i’ve lived a blissful life where i haven’t updated tumblr in many many years and this app still (basically) functioned, however a week ago i had to get a new phone and the dreaded thing finally happened: tumblr forcibly updated itself. and coming from someone who was used to 2020 app version of tumblr: what the fuck? there’s a for you page? there’s huge video ads every two posts when you’re reading the posts in the search feed? and after every ad there’s an ad for different communities which is basically an ad. i literally couldn’t even find the make of post button. why is there a whole communities tab? anyways this app feels borderline unusable to me now the experience of scrolling in a feed has been ruined. damn, yall have been living like this?

and i have more to say actually there’s a tab for “tumblr tv”? app developers, read the room, this is not the place for short form video content. and when i try to look at my activity, every time is gives me a little alert asking to turn notifications on? girl, no way in hell am i letting tumblr send me notifications on my phone where anyone could see them, again, read the room <3

Spiritually my spirit is always smoking a cigarette but physically i am.not because hashatg smoking kills

the best way i can think to describe the experience of reading moby dick is you’re in line at the dmv and this guy behind you very loudly says “well who HASN’T had a gay experience” and then proceeds to tell you every detail about his life in between anecdotes about how great sperm is and how ropes work and sometimes he’ll say the most poetic shit you’ve ever heard in your life and them jump RIGHT back into explaining how a whale is a fish because 1) it swims in water and you’re still only like halfway through the dmv line

Does anyone want to get matching tattoos and immediately have an unsalvageable falling out

proposing a new historical framework called “the very long nineteenth century: we’re still in it”

we have not left the early modern period and frankly i have my doubts that we ever will

[one single bloodcurdling agonized scream] ok time to lock in

my mind palace is not up to code

lord forgive me but I may have to make a nonessential purchase