Demasia' noches de travesura

@carmenrcmero​ replied to your post “What would you do if you woke up naked next to Carmen?”

this is like dirty the notebook. if you’re naked i’m naked.

are we making movie refs now? cause i’d got with titanic first i think. you jump, i jump. you naked, i naked.

i mean personally if we’re gonna get a tragic ending i’d rather go old and senile than young and freezing, but tbh i get to be a hot redhead either way so i’m not too bothered, jack.

Fuck: @heavenlystjames bc she’s hot and also talented and i’m into that

Marry: @djjeffries bc i like her with and without clothes on and that’s what makes a happy marriage obv

Kill: @awildecard bc it was the option i had left

@theyearofthestar is the best roomie, eyebrow threats aside. She’s cool and she strokes my ego by gobbling down my arepas like they’re the best thing ever (which they are) so I’m a happy roommate. 

My mom’s chancla was the worst roommate ever.

It’s that time of year for Sabrina’s Thirteen Nights of Halloween. Not that I need to remind all of you about this event, because I know you’ve just had it all in your calendars since last year, but this is just a way of rubbing it in the faces of those who weren’t invited. If you’re lucky enough to be on the list for Manhattan’s most exclusive horror movie viewing party, then I’ll see you at my penthouse starting at 9pm. If I can tolerate you, consider yourself invited. If I can’t, then I might gain more respect for you if you crash, or you might find yourself face to face with my security. Toodles!

So like, zero interest in exclusive stuff, but is your security hot? Cause I may wanna find myself face to face with them. Js.

DJ: i like that totally the law

DJ: and i do! people don't get it. big body and metabolism. and like, i also work out too so. food is fuel.

DJ: maybe it's your subconscious trying to tell you something.

CARMEN: it's delicious fuel

CARMEN: like thinking about it as just fuel is kinda sad. that's how you end up eating shit like kale juice.

CARMEN: yeah, it's telling me I need to get laid pronto before I hump someone's leg

RACHEL: 😘😘😘

RACHEL: So if DJ's meeting you to help carry coffees, do you need me to third wheel? Or can I just meet you at the fields?

RACHEL: If the latter's okay, I'll do my regular shopping in the morning and swing by my mom's.

CARMEN: not a third wheel, we'd just both be her tiny training wheels

CARMEN: but we can meet there

CARMEN: say hi to shelby from me

DJ: i mean i gotta be careful to not praise you too hard bc i don't want my ma to stop making me food

DJ: so do you think that's why i always eat after midnight? cause i'm like 100 gizmos?

DJ: you're just like walking right into the innuendos today dude

CARMEN: I mean it's a given your ma's food is always the best food.

CARMEN: My arepas are the best after my ma's, too. It's the law.

CARMEN: I think you just need constant fuel.

CARMEN: There's a lot of you to move around.

RACHEL: It's a bogus deal.

RACHEL: But you do you.

RACHEL: Just curious about your philanthropy.

CARMEN: I mean if you wanna be rude about it go off I guess.

CARMEN: Idk I've never played hard to get with my food tbh.

DJ: i don't think i've ever turned down free food in my life so yeah i def want some

DJ: i can meet you somewhere to help carry coffees?

DJ: and i'm sort of big foot size so i think you'd look cute anyway bc i always wanna be cute

CARMEN: and especially not my arepas

CARMEN: pls indulge my ego I am the colombian gordon ramsey I need to hear how good I am

CARMEN: Yeah ok but I'm gremlin size so I guess don't feed me after midnight if you want me to stay cute and not spawn tiny demon Carmens

CARMEN: And don't get me wet

[...]

RACHEL: Much better than your Catholic system where you can make bribes on your dead bed.

RACHEL: Did you already promise her you'd bring her snacks?

CARMEN: I mean getting to go meet the big guy with a clean file just bc you remembered to call the priest on your last breath is a pretty sweet deal.

CARMEN: I plan on taking full advantage of it.

CARMEN: No.

CARMEN: I mean I just told her I'm bringing some so she offered to meet up to help me carry the coffees, but there was no promise.

DJ: she's the capt so she knows whats up

DJ: i jsut like cheering them on

DJ: and the hangouts after cause april's p liberal with free food and booze especially if they win

DJ: and i don't think it's supposed to rain at all this weekend

DJ: actually gonna be some perfect weather for soccer. sunny but not too hot.

DJ: and i think you're prob always pretty.

CARMEN: yeah ok if there's food and booze i'm 100% in

CARMEN: i'm bringing breakfast arepas too for the game

CARMEN: and coffee

CARMEN: if you want some

CARMEN: and thank you but even the prettiest girl looks like sasquatch under a big ole ball of frizz

RACHEL: I don't remember what book it's in but basically all the dead, regardless of good or evil, all end up in Sheol. It's bleak, but I think poignant in the idea that this life right now is the only what that matters.

RACHEL: You can't live for the unknown.

[ ... ]

RACHEL: You'd still bring DJ food?

CARMEN: I mean considering my score so far I'd be better off with that system.

CARMEN: I kinda like it. Keep this life and the next separate.

CARMEN: Yeah I'm not a monster.

CARMEN: I'm not gonna stay and mess up my hair but she still deserves a treat.

DJ: i could probably make a joke about ladies being wet but it's friday and i'm tired 2

DJ: but yeah, they do. i don't wear my face paint then bc it runs and stains and then i just look like a sad clown

DJ: but unless it's like thunderstorming and stuff they play bc it's hard to reschedule missed games and fiona once explained that their record is what helps them seed for new seasons and the indoor tournament and stuff

CARMEN: well the joker is in rn so you'd look on trend I guess?

CARMEN: I legit have no idea what any of that means but I trust your trust in Fiona.

CARMEN: I like this indoor concept tho.

CARMEN: I'm worried about my hair if it rains on Sunday.

RACHEL: Good thing my Jewish sensibilities of the afterlife differ from your Christian beliefs then.

RACHEL: Frizz is never attractive.

CARMEN: I mean I wouldn't say the good place as in the tv show is super christian what with Eleanor being a bicon and also good but you know.

CARMEN: Like the pope said there's no hell so really.

CARMEN: But I had no idea you guys don't have the whole loyalty points reward system after death, I thought all religions had one. Where do good Jews go?

CARMEN: Right? Thank you.

CARMEN: Do the showers play if it rains?

[...]

RACHEL: That is what I meant when I said the offer to accompany you (and DJ) to the game needed to come with iced coffee and food, yes 😉

RACHEL: I'm not sure, but I would think general rain would be fine. Just lightning would be an issue. At least that's my understanding based on people talking about Met games at the studio.

CARMEN: Sure, pick on the dumb one.

CARMEN: Let's see you get into the good place when you die.

CARMEN: Hmm. I'll ask DJ. Cause I don't think I agreed to do this if it rains.