Array of Cosmic Dust

webcomic blog- i made my own webcomic! it's complete now, link here if u want to take a look!

project list- here's a list of all of my projects, completed, ongoing, and future! comes with links and summaries and character profiles

aa tysm kat! ^^

Where was your OC born, and where did they grow up?

jaden was born on dantooine! he was taken around age 3 to the jedi temple on courscant, a little later than the council had intended, and was then raised there!

9. Describe a mundane day in your OC's life.

god im not sure jaden has many mundane days during the war JKFSENJGKJSGD, i guess maybe one of the days theyre in hyperspace travelling between planets? lets go with that

so i guess he would wake up, clean teeth, stretch, training session with obi wan (maaaybe, depending on how their relationship is doing at any given time), eat, train by himself (may or may not have the radio going here for some entertainment), get dragged to lunch by the clones, hang out with them for several hours and help them with anything he can, work on any padawan studies if he has any, get dragged to dinner, cooldown training and bed

boil will also prod him into the shower if its been long enough and hes forgotten lol

40. What is your OC afraid of?

Ellor: 12, 17, 26.

Jaden: 2, 36, 44

Write me that essay 😎 😂

ohohhoho tysm! ^^

[tents my fingers like a supervillain and chuckles]

lets do ellor first >:3

12: What is the worst thing that has happened to your OC? How has it affected their behavior, their health, and their life in general?

losing his first master, master di, by a landslide lol. whilst master di had ofc, a few similar hangups to the rest of the council, i've characterised him a little differently, where he has reverence for the code and more or less agrees that romantic attachments should be avoided, his philosophy is much closer to 'as servants of the galaxy, we must take care of ourselves so that we can continue to do that job well' and as such, was a very caring and attentive master who would try to talk through emotions to get to the root of the problem

unfortunately ellor never quite got there, time growing up amongst the initiates and other jedi around the temple kind of cementing the more standard view of 'nope no, casting those emotions away thank u! hold urself to a high standard'

but all this rabble to say that even if ellor never quite understood the approach himself, it WAS one that helped him, and meant he had a very kind, gentle, and supportive master who has only ever wanted to nurture and help him. losing him was devastating.

specifically i'd say if affected him by making him dig into that mindset more, burying down the pain and emotions and grief as far as he could, and simply Focusing On The War. its only being under anakin and making connections with him, rex, ahsoka, hardcase etc that the wall hes built around himself begins to chip. and ofc it affected his life but completely upending him and putting him with the 501st in the first place which...yeah lbr, drastically changes the course of his life, simply through meeting these people that he comes to love so dearly.

he'll always miss him

17: What are some of your OC's coping mechanisms during stressful or overwhelming periods in their life?

ellor is a very much 'lets not think about that!!!! :)' kind of guy. its how he dealt with his masters passing, and its how he tries to deal with it whenever things get bad with the 501st. it starts to be less effective, depending on both the timeline and severity of events (for example in the umbara chapter ive just written, coping sort of goes out of the window altogether because he cant ignore it and none of his smaller coping mechanisms can work in the face of what krell did)

but in terms of smaller ones, ellor enjoys a quiet space and some hot chocolate, and he does actually get something out of meditation most of the time, so he can do those. holochess with rex can also help, but thats a little higher energy in terms of thought and strategy, so thats better if he needs a distraction rather than a place to decompress

26: How quickly does your OC reach their breaking point? What are they like when this point has been reached?

oh very slowly, partly because of the above, the repression. failing ti process traumatic events leaves them lurking at the back of his mind in dark little boxes, and whilst it takes a long, long time to get there, when those spill over hes kind helpless in it, stuck to the whims of unprocessed grief and emotions. he generally needs a lot of support and to be held because the intensity of those feelings is something hes just not been allowing himself.

and if we're talking on a far smaller level, like a breaking point of patience, then he still has a fairly high tolerance, but he will get authoritative and curt once thats been reached. shutting down the conversation, so to speak

jaden time!!!!

2. How does your OC remember their childhood? Is this an accurate reflection of what their childhood was actually like?

jaden remembers verrrrryyy little about dantooine, he has a strong memory of two, and a distinct sense of nostalgia and knowing when he visits it once during the first year of the war, but otherwise all of that is more like a hazy dream

childhood at the jedi temple however??? he remembers trying very hard all of the timer and fucking up and getting sent out because of his loud emotions and everyone hating him besides barriss even though he really wanted to connect with people and disappointing his teachers lol

is this accurate??? mostly, but also his strong emotions has kind of like....enhanced the intensity of it. if he was sent out maybe once in a week because peoples emotions were making him fumble and project those, then it feels it happened multiple times that week yknow? he feels like the other initiates hated him, but it was more that they liked him enough, but his emotion projection was just a bit much for them and it made them kinda of avoid him unless they needed to spend time with him. which is naturally still very painful as a kid lol

and like yeah he disappointed his teachers. but he impressed others, and they pitied him more than they were like, annoyed with him i think??exasperation was like, the limit.

and like, you'd think with this force empathy he'd pick that up, but i think its that hes picking up their emotions, feeling the worst little bit of it, and kind of expanding that.

tldr like hes right but its not Quite as bad. quite being the operative word. the disappointment and exasperation was real and it affected him deeply

36. Does your OC believe they deserve it when bad things happen to them?

oh this is an interesting one. i dont think so, but i think its more that like...he doesn’t really think about it in terms of deserve? like a bad thing happens and hes too busy floundering against the bad thing itself to really reflect it on himself. hes very...other people focused, and doesnt really turn thoughts inward, bc he doesnt really...count himself as a person??? not in a self loathing sense, but a discomfort with also being a person who needs things and support and exists in a physical sense. its the same attitude that makes him be astounded when vatara starts showing romantic interest in him because its like 'ME????????????? ME???????'

its...hard to think about deserving when you see yourself as a weapon, bad things happen and if its to him then like whatever. this is how it is. [suffers the emotional and physical consequences anyway], bad things happen to others and 'i need to be better'

44. Do others consider your OC to be scary or intimidating?

oh absolutely not lol JKFDSJKGSDNGDNGJKSD, jaden is a lanky stringbean of a teenager with the biggest doe eyes and the trauma to match. whilst hes very capable and does force himself to adapt to war and get better at lightsaber combat and becomes VERY adept at deflection, its more like...

clones: feel very bad for him, big protective instinct. its obvious this is a kid who probably should be here, not bc of a lack of capability, but the emotional and mental harm its doing to him

ahsoka: stinky boy (not like personality wise hes just a teenager in a war. stinky.). but theyre still friends and she wants to help him. shes better at lightsaber combat than him so shes esp not scared lol

barriss: a mix of pity and genuine connection. shes always been a little worried for him, but she was like the only person that reached out as initiates and that helped them both a lot. debate nerds lol

council as a whole: time bomb. they’re not scared or intimidated by him, its very hard to be with his demeanour., more that they’re wary of what they think he could become.

obi wan: he loves him and is endlessly frustrated by him and how he "doesnt seem to listen". the feeling is mutual