Whatever I Feel Like

He was smiling…

A wide giddy grin.

Naked as the day he was born. All cuddled up in the arms of someone else.

You were peeking through something. A crack in the door or a parting in some curtains, but you weren't entirely sure.

Regardless, you could see enough.

You were witnessing someone you love…intimately involved with someone else.

Someone that's not you.

The heavy, sinking feeling that all your time together was a complete utter waste.

Evenings having tea parties and hat fittings. Nights curled up together either in a blissful afterglow or comforting respite after a grueling or exhausted day.

Nights when he cried in your arms…overwhelmed, confused, and unstable.

Nights spent reassuring him that you were his friend…his lover…someone he can rely on.

A waste.

A lie.

The most compelling delusion the Mad Hatter had ever conjured up and he didn't even need to use any of his skills to do it.

You could almost feel a tear inside your chest from your heart being torn in two.

It didn't take long for the tears to start flowing from your eyes. Maybe you would wind up like Alice…but you would actually just prefer to drown instead of participating in a caucus race.

"How…how could you…Jervis…Jervis…why?"

Suddenly, you felt a weird pressure on your shoulder. Almost like someone was urging you to move forward…

Your eyes jolted open. A warm hand was indeed on your shoulder.

A concerned voice called your name.

The heartbreaking scene was gone the instant your eyes opened.

You heard the voice call your name again with another gentle shove.

"Oh, oh, you're awake…finally awake!"

"J-Jervis?" You turned to face him.

After blinking away the blurriness in your vision and adjusting to the dark. You did indeed make out the image of Jervis by your side.

Somehow he was both the only person and the last person you wanted to see.

Even though you have swiftly come to the conclusion what you saw was indeed a gut wrenching nightmare. However the sinking depressing feeling lingered.

"Are you all right? I woke up when I heard you crying…crying my name into the night."

His hand beat your hand to feel your cheek which was damp from your tears that you actually did shed and not just in your dream.

"Oh dear, oh dear…what was the cause of your tears?"

"I just…it was just…a nightmare, Jervis." You explained as you grabbed a room temperature water bottle from your nightstand.

"A nightmare…an un-dream. To bring you to tears, perhaps, there's more than was it seems?"

Out of all the dreams and nightmares you have had in your life. The bits and pieces you can maybe recollection the following morning. You despised being able to recall this nightmare so vividly.

You wouldn't be able to shrug it off or claim you forgot.

"I…uh…" You put the water down on your side table. You were trying to buy yourself some time to think of what to say and how to say it.

"I don't know exactly where I was or how I got there. Or what I was doing or how it started I just…saw you…with someone else…intimately."

Somehow saying it out loud made you start choking up. You could almost feel pressure just under your eyelids as if the floodgates were going to open again.

Nevertheless, you continued. "You were…so happy. All cuddled up next to them in bed." You shook your head. Shaking the image out of your mind. "I-I know it's—it's just a nightmare…it just looked and felt so real…hence the tears."

Jervis' eyebrows furrowed in the middle. His mouth was slightly agape in shock.

Him? Cheat on you? Leave you for some random person? After everything you two have been through? How cruel of your mind

"I…I would never. I could never ever do that to you…"

You interjected. "I know, I know you wouldn't. It just…" You finally turned your body so you could face him again fully.

Jervis reached for your hands and pressed them to his chest. You could feel his heart begin beating rapidly.

"It felt so real…and I…sometimes I do wonder if…y'know…if you perhaps get bored of me or if I'm…enough."

That was the only logical explanation you could offer to why you had the nightmare. Your anxieties getting the better of you.

Jervis shook his head before offering you a small smile. "Darling, it's far too late in the night…or perhaps too early in the morning to think of six impossible things before breakfast…but that is indeed a good one."

He kissed your knuckles before scooting his body closer to yours. "You're more than enough…I-I can never get enough of you…especially the happiness and companionship you've given me all this time and continue to."

"I may be mad, my dear, but I am not a fool. I've tried many substances, drugs, elixirs, herbs, and concoctions…chasing just a sliver of what your affection gives me in excess. I can only hope that I return the affections onto you tenfold."

You giggled softly. A smile slowly growing on your face. "You have…and do return the affection tenfold. And you are indeed mad, but you're the smartest mad man I know."

You leaned closer and lowered your head so the tip of your nose rested against the tip of his nose.

"And I love you. So very, very much, Jervis. I…I'm sorry my nightmare upset you and woke you…"

Jervis shook his head. "No need to apologize, darling, I just hope it never happens again…and I love you too."

You tilted your head to the side so your lips could meet his.

Jervis' lips soon left yours to start a trail across your face to your cheek and down to your neck. Even leaving little bite marks along your jaw and the nape of skin between your neck and shoulder. Muttering about moving down for a clean cup.

He was just about to continue his trek of kisses down your body. When he looked up at you with a cheeky smile and a twinkle in his eyes.

- Jervis sends you many, many love letters while he's in Arkham. I wouldn't be surprised if Arkham Post Office had to cap his outgoing mail.

- You're not sure how, exactly, but he somehow even manages to send you flowers too…

- This man has a countless list of date ideas; picnics, strolls, cozy nights in, fun cute activities…You name it.

- Jervis' favorite date idea however has to be the picnic dates though. He loves rowing the boat to a secluded little area, basket of food in tow on one arm and your arm around his other arm…

- Definitely hears wedding bells after the first date and they only get louder as the days go by.

- Sometimes he will try to wake up before you do, so he can watch you sleep…you look so sweet and peaceful beside him--its hard to resist the opportunity.

- He will also try to wake you up by making your favorite hot beverage whether its tea or coffee (if you like neither of those things he will still try and think of something sweet and savory to give you)

- One of his favorite places to rest his head is in your lap…your gentle and caring touch caressing his blonde hair as you read to him or talk to him.

- This man lives for kisses. Kisses and kisses galore. Your temple, your forehead, the back of your hand, your cheeks, and of course your lips…he wants it all.

BTAS Riddler

You woke up to Edward shaking you. Tears spilling across your cheeks—unlike other nightmares you recalled this one clearly…

A nightmare based on an anxiety that haunts you night and day, that you try to keep at bay.

Edward almost feels guilty…even if he didn't actually commit the act of cheating…has he…not done enough to reassure your anxieties?

He's quick to put his hand on your shoulder and squeeze it reassuringly…reminding you that he's here, with you—there's nowhere else he'd rather be!

Edward Nygma, the Riddler, adores you and only you. Only you have solved the enigma that can be his heart…and no one else.

Him referring to his heart as a puzzle made you giggle a little, but it did make you feel special!

Edward wrapped his arms around you, and you rested your head on his chest…

You managed to fall back asleep to Edward kissing your head and his hands gently rubbing your back…

BTAS Mad Hatter

I don't know why but I feel like given what he's been through in Arkham, Jervis is a fairly light sleeper.

So, he jolts from bed when he hears what he can swear is weeping…his heart breaks when he sees your awake. Your back is toward him, but he can hear you sniffling, no doubt trying to wipe your tears…

Jervis' heart practically shatters when you tell him what your nightmare was about…Him? Ch-cheating on you?

His arms were around you in an instant, his head nestled in the crook of your neck and shoulder…

Jervis begins whispering reassurances in your ear. His arms tightening around your waist periodically.

He…he could never? Why would he ever? You know how much you mean to him…no one could even remotely compare…

Eventually, your nerves were able to calm down and your tears stopped…but his affections didn't stop.

He kissed your tear-stained cheeks, he caressed your face as you both settled back into bed. Jervis whispering how much he loves you—

BTAS Scarecrow

While Jonathan yearns to be the harbinger of nightmares to many…he never wants you to suffer from them or any fears in general.

He wakes up because he hears you, tearfully, crying out his name—yet your eyes were still closed…

When your eyes slowly blink open, Jonathan worriedly asked what's wrong…

Jonathan was in complete shock when you shakily explain you had a nightmare about him cheating on you…

He brought you into his arms, his hand caressing your back up and down.

Jonathan tells you how he could never leave you, no one could remotely hold a candle to you…to understand him and love him for all his faults as you do…He would be an absolute fool to ever cheat on you or leave you…

Hearing Jonathan be so…vulnerable and open with his feelings…not only was it…reassuring but it also just made you fall in love with him all over again…

BTAS Penguin

Oswald was stirred awake when his hand didn't meet your waist like it would many nights before.

Instead, it met your thigh, you were propped up in bed, breathing shakily and drinking some water.

When Oswald asked what was wrong…you were reluctant to answer…it was just a nightmare…but Oz thought it might make you feel better to talk about it.

He was shocked that your mind was so cruel as to conjure up such a scenario…

But he comforts you, takes your hand and clasps his hands around it.

Oswald couldn't imagine anyone else's laugh or smile he'd rather hear or see…he dreams about a life with you until he leaves this earth.

You've shown him such devoted and unconditional love…he wouldn't dare throw that away for anyone or anything.