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birthofcassiopeia

I feel they would be specifically bad at communication

Robert: he’s probably gonna get tired of me

sonar: I wonder what size ring he wears

I miss drawing themmmm

I keep sketching them but then not posting it…? happy vers under cut lol

#op u made him look so soft #also Dynamic of ALL Time #stupid (reciprocal)

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thestarlotus

big fan of malevonar being neither platonic or romantic but a secret third thing (hr violation)

#so mad I love the moistcritical bat so much

cameron-phillips

Ready or Not (2019)

Ready or Not 2: Here I Come (2026)

elodieunderglass

Package containing three reusable silicone lids for preserving supermarket hummus, which cost very little and which I honestly don’t give a fig about: we’ve posted your parcel. (we’ve posted your parcel.) your parcel is posted. Your parcel is posted. Your parcel is moving. Tracking number for your parcel. Your parcel is being hand-carried to the depot by a courier named GREG. Your parcel is nestled gently at the DEPOT. Your parcel has been fed and watered and given a comfort break. Your parcel’s overnight nurse is named DILYS. She has twelve years of experience and a qualification. She reports YOUR PARCEL is DOING WELL. YOUR PARCEL HAS LEFT THE BUILDING. YOUR PARCEL HAS LEFT THE BUILDING. Your courier is named MERVYN and he is an AQUARIUS. your parcel is due at 12:13. We apologise. Your parcel is due at 12:17. This is due to MERVYN encountering ROADWORKS. Your parcel is circling. MERVYN is on your street. MERVYN IS HERE. Here is a photo of your feet with the parcel. Your parcel ARRIVED. how did you like MERVYN. Was he okay. Would you use him again. Would you trust Dilys to safeguard the following: a glass case containing a crystal gem / a balloon / a bucket of water. Your parcel was four minutes late. We’ll email you forever now. Do you like this

Package containing fragile and valuable birthday present to myself, anxiously awaited: due date of FUCKOFF Posted NEVER 💅

tedspankoffski

gabe showing off his setup and dice collection in the starkid insta takeover is actually the purest thing in the world. i love you, gabe greenspan. never change.

#Gabe Greenspan my beloved

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the-quasar-hero

We all got that one mutual that be going through the most treacherous situations a person could endure and then posting a few minutes later about why such and such should get fucked through a concrete wall.

the-quasar-hero

Mutual: my situationship partner just got caught in a tornado at a broken glass factory where they were cheating on me with my landlord who just increased my rent by 6000% and my pet marmot has a disease so rare they’re naming it after him and all my bones are becoming apricot jelly which I’m allergic to.

Same mutual 16 minutes later: Do you think Ronald McDonald and the Burger King ever explored each other’s bodies?

cupcraft

You never know what color pallette someone's Tumblr is till ppl are screenshotting posts and tags

aropride

do u like mine

cupcraft

Oh wow.

cupcraft

Some people on tumblr are reading ancient scrolls and you'd never know

nwmo

NEW FISH JUST DROPPED

cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024

I KNOW that playing God is morally wrong, but holy HELL, it looks fun.

ninjakittenarmy

Why is it playing God? We aren’t violating any natural laws. God set the parameters of the universe to allow these things. There’s nothing wrong with it, there’s no hubris in learning more about how to manipulate the universe around us.

cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024

We made a whole-ass fish.

ospreyonthemoon

The reason this was accidental BTW is because they used paddlefish eggs as a negative control group for a breeding experiment on sturgeons because the scientists, quite naturally, assumed that they were SO unrelated it would be genetically impossible for them to mate. Like. I cannot stress enough to you how these creatures last related ancestors were

140 MILLION YEARS BACK.

If you don't know how far that is, that's basically the start of the cretaceous. Let me simplify that for you even further. Chimpanzees and humans seperated, what, 5 or 6 million years ago?

This is basically like if humans could hybridise with THESE THINGS.

This is the sort of thing that should be impossible. They used those eggs to be ABSOLUTELY 100% SURE NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN.

And then THEY GOT FISH OUT OF IT.

Like. You can quite clearly understand why they didn't think anything would happen. WE ARE MORE RELATED TO BLUE WHALES THAN THESE THINGS.

THE AMERICAN PADDLEFISH AND THE STURGEON ARE SO COMPLETELY UNRELATED THAT THIS IS NOT PLAYING GOD. IF ANYTHING THIS IS AN ACT OF GOD.

THE SCIENTISTS HAD NO BLAME IN THIS BECAUSE NOTHING LIKE THIS HAD EVER HAPPENED BEFORE

It sort of goes against the rules of genetics a bit.

ospreyonthemoon

Oh i forgot to add

THESE THINGS, FOR HYBRIDS, HAD A REALLY HIGH SURVIVAL RATING. LIKE 70% OF THEM SURVIVED.

To put that into perspective, getting a blue whale and a squirrel and trying to hybridise them is more sensible, and that wouldn't produce anything but getting you banned from science. Most animals that aren't plants can barely hybridise two degrees away from each other.

BUT THESE TWO ENTIRELY UNRELATED FISH create PERFECTLY HEALTHY HYBRIDS.

the scientists literally had to do the tests AGAIN just to be like "okay this is real right. This is actually like, not a fluke, this works right" and it worked again. They just Can!

jackofacetrades

So for those who don't know what the original fishes look like, this is an American Paddlefish:

And this is a Russian Sturgeon:

So honestly, saying the hybrid is "weird looking" is a bit fort de café when you see its parents. I think the sturddlefish looks cute.

marlinspirkhall

"these creatures last related ancestors were 140 million years back"

(glances at fish)

Yeah that's exactly what I thought you'd look like, you Mesozoic fuck

thriceandonce

#Holding a red squirrel in my left hand and a blue whale in my right desperately hoping to make a purple squale (via @dykepuffs)

kedreeva

placental mammals (eutheria) diverged from marsupials around 100 million years ago. whales and squirrels (rodents at least), being both placental animals, would have diverged at or after that time, meaning sturgeon and paddlefish still have 40 million years more separation.

before the sturddlefish, a purple squale would have seemed more likely- and since that's ridiculous and obviously no one would think that's possible except as a joke, that should speak to HOW impossible this situation seemed, and why they thought obviously this will be perfectly fine. If you took squirrel eggs (the gamete) and tried to use whale sperm to fertilize them, you could reasonably expect that to not work. That should be a good control. The eggs would definitely not actually be fertilized, and even if sperm somehow made it into the egg and some kind of development started, you would expect them to not make it to term and definitely not make a whole ass new animal that's perfectly fine actually.

And yet there is a purple squale in your fish tank, in fact there's like 100 of them and everyone is saying you played god but this was not what should have gone down, this was never the plan. This isn't you playing god, you think, this is god having a laugh at your expense.

itznarcotic

there's nothing more isolating than knowing that others are having fun without you and you're unable to join because of a lack of one unifying thing that seemingly everybody else but you has access to

itznarcotic

this shit is the real cuck chair

mausspacearchive

it’s 2014 can taylor swift stop

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ohcaptains

allthingswhumpyandangsty

finding that one fandom friend that GETS you and your blorbos the way no one else does is a privilege and it will literally change your life

#kate tag.#quin tag.#apothreeosis.

strwbrrysdpop

I'll be so honest it's almost 1am for me I have no idea if this came out good but here have some crossnamara angst I was feeling in the mood for it :,)

#oh #that's fine

loreleywrites

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

mayahart

THE GOOD PLACE (2016—2020) cr. Michael Schur

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dsmsix

ablaske

they're on a video conference

dsmsix

starcanwrecked-confessions

if you genuinely think that people who enjoy melissa saying “omg my queen she did no wrong” means need you to tell them that murder is bad then you cannot be helped. you are not saving anyone from dark evil thoughts because they clearly think murder and torture is okay you are being condescending while simultaneously looking like someone who cannot distinguish “fans of fictional character” from “fans of murderers.”

this is not true crime and you are not a hero protecting victims you are. annoying. you don’t have to point anything out. everyone already knows. you have brought no new information to the table.

~~~

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