A Ruined Mind

i have what i wanted. why am i not happy?

wishing for what i had. but wondering if it’s even worth it

why are hard conversations so gut wrenching

She’s so beautiful. She’s kind. She’s sweet. She’s funny. She’s perfect. She dresses so beautifully. She’s cute. She’s such a caring person. She’s one of the few truly nice people in the world. I want to give her so much. I have so much to give her. But J just don’t know if she wants it. If she wants me. If she likes me. I like her. I love her. I can’t go a minute without thinking about her. I can’t go an hour without finding something that reminds me of her. I can’t go a day without talking to her. I can’t go a week without seeing her beautiful smile and her sweet eyes. I love her. I miss her. And I want her. I just wish I could tell her already. 🕸️🍓🖤🥀

the mannequins in the dress store were so thin :( I didn’t want to overthink too much, but its very motivating considering i’ll be shopping for dresses nest year for prom

gotta lose at least 20lbs by the end of april. hoping i can be 145 by the end of march. 🤞 just gotta st.arve :)

Hit a new lw yesterday, but then i overate at night and today after dinner. Either way, i did a quick exercise and i’m doing omad until saturday. when i re weight saturday morning I WILL BE AT A NEW LW. like i’m not letting myself gain anymore

give me good workout routines. please. i feel so fat and gross. gosh