mikel ballart; twenty-seven, tennis player
ā You can walk away from your mistakes. You can turn your back on what you do. Just a little smile is all it takes. ā
alyssa let out a sigh. she didn't want to react to much to mikel right now. because there was a lot she could be saying to him right about now. there's a lot that she could yell out to him or curse. or get super angry. but what exactly would've been the point of all that, really? it wouldn't get either of them anywhere. despite the way she felt about him right now. his attempt to be honest and admit his shortcoming seemed genuine, but the hurt inside of her remained unchanged. " fine. " she said. her tone softer but still tinged with the slight bitterness of unsolved hurt at their situation. " i appreciate that you're tying to be honest now. but it doesn't erase the events or make what happened between us any easier because i cared for you at one point. " she closed her eyes and paused to be able to take a deep breath. " did that ever matter? " she questioned because she truly and deeply wanted to know.
" you're right. i am pissed and i have every right to be. it just --- this doesn't change how i feel. and i know it isn't going to. " she was trying to manage the way she was feeling now. " it's clear that you're not good at handling emotions and maybe that was part of the problem. you didn't know how to handle things with us back then, and now it feels like youāre only realizing that too late. i wish you had come to terms with this sooner, but here we are. "
mikel shifted uncomfortably, her words cutting deeper than he wanted to admit. he hated hearing her like thisācold, detached, even though he knew it was his fault. he ran a hand through his hair, trying to collect his thoughts, though his usual confidence felt distant. did it matter? her question echoed in his head, and for the first time, mikel wasnāt sure how to respond. "of course it mattered," he said quietly, his voice uncharacteristically subdued. "i know i didnāt show it like i shouldāve. i screwed up, i know that. but it mattered. you mattered."
he clenched his fists, his frustration with himself bubbling beneath the surface. how could he even begin to explain that he never meant to hurt her, that he wasnāt even fully aware of the damage heād done until now? everything always felt like a game to him, something to win or loseābut alyssa wasnāt just another match. she was different. he just hadnāt realized it until it was too late. "i didnāt know how to handle it," he admitted, swallowing hard, the words tasting bitter. "i wasnāt good at⦠any of this, back then. and maybe iām still not. but iām trying, alyssa. i really am. i get it if thatās not enough for you." his gaze dropped to the ground, hating the vulnerability that came with moments like this. he wasnāt used to admitting failure, especially not to someone like herāsomeone he actually cared about.
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starter type: o p e n. @palmviewstarters
where: elevator in location of your choice. (i'll adapt to whatever location works for your muse)
when: friday, time is up to you.
''I-...'' Hyun looks around him before focusing on the other person briefly, his gaze going back to the buttons panel, confused about what to do next but choosing to remain calm. ''... I guess we're stuck.''
mikel leaned against the wall of the elevator, arms crossed, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. "just what we needed," he muttered, his tone carrying a playful edge mixed with impatience. his eyes flicked from hyun to the panel, and with a casual shrug, he reached out to press the emergency button, though he wasnāt entirely sure it did anything.
"i guess someoneās gotta come for us eventually, yeah?" he said, attempting to sound more confident than he felt.
mikel glanced at hyun again. "youāre not claustrophobic, are you?" he added, his smirk growing slightly, teasing but not entirely unkind.
alyssa was watching mikel with a mixture of emotions running throughout her right now. the feelings of disbelief, frustration, and continued hurt was evident on her features right about now. though, the vulnerability that alyssa saw in his was almost enough to convince her. even if she talked herself into never believing a word mikel had ever spoken ever again. it wasn't enough to just erase the hurt that she still felt. the blonde folded her arms over her chest which had became a protective gesture over sometime. taking a deep breath before she started to speak. " really, mikel? so.. now you want to go and play the ' people change ' card with me? " there was still some bitterness there behind her tone of voice.
" after everything, you think a few words just makes it all better? you hurt me and it wasn't just a mistake; it was betrayal. plain and simple. no matter how much you can stand there and tell me that you've changed or tried to change it doesn't undo the fact that any trust or reliability i had with you is broken. and i'm not sure how that could ever be repaired. " shaking her head; while still struggling to keep her composure in front of her ex. " you had your change to show me you were changing. plenty of times, actually. when it mattered, you could've said something back then. but you didn't and now this just seems like an excuse and i'm not sure i want to hear it. i'm still trying to figure out how to move past this. "
mikel listens to her with a furrowed brow, his frustration building, not just at the situation but at himself. his instinct is to throw up his defenses, to be the cocky, unbothered version of himself that he's clung to for so long. but he knows thatās what got him into this mess in the first place. āalright, fine,ā he says, a bit defensively, though he tries to keep it in check. āi get it, youāre pissed, and you have every right to be. iām not saying a few words are gonna fix everything. i just⦠i didnāt know how to handle it back then. i know thatās not an excuse, but itās all iāve got right now.ā
he takes a breath, trying to push back the cynicism that always seems to linger at the edge of his words. āiām not good at this whole emotional thing, okay? i messed up, and i know itās not easy to just forget. i just⦠wanted to say iām sorry. even if itās too little, too late.ā his voice trails off, and he kicks a small rock with his foot, feeling the weight of his own inadequacy in the moment. āi donāt know what else to say.ā
mikel stepped into the elevator, sunglasses perched on his nose even though it was cloudy outside. he jabbed the button for his floor, leaning against the mirrored wall, arms crossed. as the doors slid shut, they paused, reopening to reveal her again. it was the fourthāno, fifth time in two weeks that he'd run into her in the elevator, and mikel couldnāt shake the growing suspicion that it wasnāt just coincidence.the elevator hummed as it began its ascent, and mikel shifted his weight, finally breaking the silence that had built up over the past few days of awkward encounters. his voice dripped with his usual blend of confidence and cynicism."you know, if you wanted an autograph, you could've just asked," he said, barely glancing her way. "no need to follow me around all the time."
it had been quite a while since her and mikel had spoken. the pain she had felt from his actions even if it was only just a year ago had effected her more than she thought it would. having to ever find forgiveness in her heart for him would be hard when the grudge festering deep inside her still had not completely healed. would she always care for him? of course. but the hurt she had felt was overridden by that. " you know.... it's been a year and even still i wasn't expecting to have to see you here. i was hoping i wouldn't have to run into you but i guess that's simply wishful thinking on my end. "
mikel shifts his weight in the sand, staring at the water for a moment before turning back to her. his usual cocky smirk flickers briefly, but it doesnāt stay. thereās something more vulnerable about him now, though itās clear heās still struggling to let it show. āyeah, well⦠i wasnāt exactly planning on seeing you either.ā he pauses, rubbing the back of his neck. ālook, i know you donāt wanna hear it, but i get it. what i did, it wasāā he stops, searching for the right words, but that old arrogance slips in. āāit was bad. real bad. but people change, yeah? or at least, they try.ā
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[ ⦠] ā youāre not from around here , are you? i figured because you totally just missedĀ { MIKEL BALLART }Ā walking by. donāt tell me you donāt know whoĀ { HE/HIM }Ā is/are ? they kind of look likeĀ { JACOB ELORDI }Ā and i could be wrong but i think that they might beĀ { 27 }Ā years old right now. theyāve been living in palmview for the lastĀ { YEAR }.Ā and i donāt know if anyone has ever told them this before but they kind of remind me ofĀ { JAMIE TARTT }Ā fromĀ { TED LASSO }. if you stick around the town long enough you might catch them in action working atĀ { - }Ā as aĀ { TENNIS PLAYER }. you see this town isnāt really that big of a place, some folks like to call them theĀ { REDEEMED BAD BOY }Ā of palmview! they took a liking to the name too after a while, go figure. oh crap, they must have heard me yapping. theyāre coming this way. i got to warn you though, rumor has it they can prettyĀ { SELF-CENTERED }Ā at times. i wouldnāt take it too seriously though, from the times iāve spoken to them they seemed prettyĀ { CHARISMATIC }Ā to me. we see each other all the time since they live in thatĀ { 6A }Ā apartment beside me over inĀ { CORAL COVE }. i better leave you to it. it was nice meeting you!Ā
āøŗ Ā Ā ONEĀ Ā Ā , Ā Ā Ā LINKSĀ .
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āøŗ Ā Ā TWOĀ Ā Ā , Ā Ā Ā STATSĀ .
ā¦Ā full name. mikel river ballart ⦠age.Ā twenty-seven ⦠date of birth.Ā august 15, 1997 ā¦Ā place of birth.Ā melbourne, australia ⦠gender.Ā cis-male ⦠pronouns.Ā he/him ⦠sexual orientation.Ā bisexual ā¦Ā occupation.Ā tennis player ā¦Ā faceclaim.Ā jacob elordi ā¦Ā zodiac.Ā leo sun, capricon moon and rising.
mikel was born in melbourne, australia, the youngest of three. his mother fought to keep the family afloat, scrimping and saving while his father let the unemployment benefits slip through his fingers.
as mikel came of age, the pattern of his fatherās self-destruction became all too clear. the police visits were a frequent occurrence, each one followed by his father's promises of reform. but those promises were as fleeting as the wind, and soon, everything would return to the same broken state.
despite this turmoil, mikel yearned for his father's approval, believing that making him happy could alleviate the familyās distress. their mutual love for tennis provided a fleeting escape, with cherished afternoons spent at the local court. in these moments, his fatherās aspirations weighed heavily, nurturing the belief that mikelās rise as a professional player could be their salvation from the clutches of poverty.
mikelās love for tennis became his refuge in school, where he struggled with undiagnosed adhd and dyslexia, and faced harsh bullying for his academic difficulties and reserved nature. his fortunes changed unexpectedly when a sports agent, noticing his talent at a local tournament, offered him a scholarship to a prestigious academy in brisbane.
mikelās life changed fast at the academy. he went from an outcast to a rising star, with everyone wanting his friendship. his tennis skills soared, and so did his ego. he was just eleven, but his pride was even bigger. yet, the cheers at the academy were a stark contrast to the silence at home, where bruises told stories he didnāt dare speak of. things had gotten worse since they left melbourne, and as mikel got older, he grew more afraid of his father. unable to challenge his father about the mistreatment of his mother and siblings.
in 2009, sitting in a hospital waiting for her sonās broken arm to be set, mila made up her mind to leave her abusive husband. mikel had been hurt in a fit of rage after losing a set. mila packed their bags and bought tickets to her parents' hometown in spain. at first, mikel thought it was a short stay, but as his arm healed and no talk of going back came up, he grew angry and silent. for months, he didnāt speak to his mother. finally, mila enrolled him in a local school and academy, trying to help him settle and find some peace.
the academy he attended was small and lacked the resources to nurture his talent. it wasnāt long before one of his coaches, seeing his potential, arranged a scholarship for him to attend a prestigious academy in spain. at just thirteen, mikel left home once more, this time moving to alicante on his own. there, he found himself among other young tennis hopefuls, training hard and competing on the junior circuit.
his junior career was fairly successful; he reached a junior grand slam final and climbed to a ranking of fifth in the world. but it was when he stepped onto the professional tour at sixteen that his talent truly began to shine.
mikelās journey was shaped by a partnership with a coach who became a father figure to him, guiding him to his first professional title. his breakthrough year was filled with remarkable triumphs, including his first grand slam victory and a swift rise in the rankings. yet, off the court, he battled his own demons. the specter of his estranged father still loomed over him, affecting his personal life and gnawing at his mental well-being.
mikelās talent was undeniable, yet his reputation both on and off the court told a different story. he was the rebel, the bad boy of tennis, known for shouting at umpires and refusing to shake hands with his opponent after a loss. his tumultuous relationship with the press always grabbed the headlines, while his striking looks brought him fans and sponsors. he was the kind of player people loved to hate, his name always on their lips.
though mikel had found success, his career was thrown off course by a serious injury that led to a dependency on painkillers, which resulted in a suspension from the sport. his battle with addiction and the relentless pressure to maintain his public image and keep his sponsorships forced him into rehab. he released a statement to the press, explaining heād miss the rest of the season due to a lingering foot injury. he spent two months at a rehab center in florida before moving to palmview grove for the remainder of his suspension.
it has been four months since the suspension was lifted, yet he still grapples with the fear of slipping back into his old habits. this fear has kept him from returning to the court, even as his coach insists he is ready. mikelās sights are set on being prepared for the next season in january.
over the past year, mikel has learned that being a star isnāt as satisfying as heād once thought. fame and fortune looked good from the outside, but underneath, he struggled with many demons. for the past year, heās been working on those personal battles, focusing less on being a great player and more on becoming a better person.
āøŗ Ā Ā FOURĀ Ā , Ā Ā Ā PERSONALITY
at his core, he's a people pleaser, shy, and compliant, reminiscent of his childhood self.
he struggles with expressing his true emotions and uses a fake confident persona to hide his insecurities.
he's perceived as egotistical and rude, but few realize his vulnerability and fear of being broken.
mikel craves attention and sometimes struggles with sharing the spotlight.
in relationships, he commits sincerely but moves on quickly if it ends.
eager to learn and strives to be the best, even if it doesn't always succeed.
currently, he is trying to acknowledge his past mistakes, make amends, and improve himself as a person.
āøŗ Ā FIVEĀ Ā , Ā Ā Ā HEADCANONS
he goes to therapy twice a week, although he mostly treats it as a interview and struggles to really talk about his issues.
has a four-year-old mix golden retriever/labrador named sadie
claims his favourite book is "to kill a mockingbird" because he sort of watched the film at school
hates when people call him mike
he took on his mother's surname when he became a pro player and legally changed it when he was 18. his last name surname was bancroft
heās not very into fashion, he likes comfort so something he likes about being an athlete is that he gets to dress comfortably most of the time.
often wakes up before 7 am, but since he hasn't been an active player he's been trying to sleep past 8 am and stay up longer.
while he's not the best cook in the world, he can cook different types of pasta and sauces. mostly, because it's what he normally ate when he was training and playing.
he can speak fluent Spanish. his mother was born in australia but her parents come from the basque country. he can speak some basque but not a lot.
even if he has double citizenship (spanish and australian), he represents australia.
if he had gone to university (which he wouldn't lol) he would have studied something related to cinema. he loves movies and it's pretty much the only form of entertainment that can have his attention.
for the previous reason, he rarely watches tv shows because his attention span is too short and binging a tv show makes him feel uneasy.
a year ago, he was offered to participate in the latest love island australia but he turned it down when he learned he would have to share bedroom with other people.
it might come as a surprise but he's only been drunk twice in his life.
while he can be a dickhead to most people, heās usually one of those players that try to give autographs to every fan who asks for one.
his best ranking has been #1 in the world which he achieved when he was 21. his first grand slam was the us open at 20. in total he has 6 grand slams and 35 titles.
his proudest moments in his career was when he won the australian open at 24 and again at 26.
he's sponsored by: adidas, head, tag heuer, calvin klein, evian, porsche, BBVA, hugo boss.