sooo, what are we gonna binge tonight?

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ANONS

Phainon already changed into his baggy clothes, and had his glasses resting on his nose bridge. Gone were the smart casual fits and contacts he usually wore, but then again, he was still super hot. When he saw you from the couch, Phainon paused some movie he was watching. In real time, his mouth widened into a huge grin and he immediately ran towards you with arms opened.

“Honey, you’re here!”

You allowed yourself to be shadowed and crushed into a tight embrace by the enthusiastic man, who for sure was aware of how strong his grip was. You also allowed Phainon to yap your ears off, despite wishing all day for a semblance of peace. Though to be quite frank, Phainon’s voice was hella soothing to the ears and you were hella in love with him you really couldn’t quite bring yourself to zip his lips. 

Though, you did have a plan on how to do that, just not the rude way.

Pulling away from the hug, Phainon was still smiling—overjoyed to see you. He still had one arm curled around your waist, and then, oh, his large, warm hand cupping your cheek. You didn’t know why, but at that one touch, your eyes stung. Phainon did not seem to notice yet how you blinked once, then twice, and you weren’t sure of what he was saying next.

Your ears only picked up the: “I made some soup that you liked so much. Of course, I needed some assistance from Mydei, because well, you know. He’s a better cook than all of us, but, but, rest assured that I did all the work!” Yeah, you still weren’t sure why your eyes stung and your vision seemed to blur, but you blinked it again. Once. And twice. “After eating dinner, what would you like to do next, honey? It’s Friday, so that means we can stay up all night, if that’s what you wish. We could get started on watching that series you’ve been eyeing for a while—”

“H–hey, Phainon?” Oh. Fuck. Your voice cracked. Great.

And the thing was, Phainon was perceptive. This was one aspect that some folks missed. The elation in his face disappeared—and it was replaced by furrowed brows and lips curving downwards. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. “Is there something wrong, hon—”

And also, if there was one thing to distract him with, you could always use yourself. 

“Do you wanna make out?”

5 minutes later there are two lips smacking passionately on the couch. 

Right, so that’s what happened. Yes, you’re stressed. Super stressed. And very very tired, and you do not want to burden your boyfriend who’ll also get stressed over you once he learns that you haven’t been feeling so good. You don’t want to add ‘Reassure Phainon That There’s Nothing to Worry About’ on your list, so you pull Phainon closer to yourself. Letting yourself enveloped by none other than Phainon of Aedes Elysiae. 

The kiss deepens, and your tongue meets his. Phainon releases a groan, before melting right into you. Yes. This is it. At least distracting Phainon is going according to plan—

“—Hah, honey, you’re doing this again, mmph—” You yank him to prevent him from talking, and you wonder if he’s talking about you taking the lead in kissing, not until he pries himself from you again ( though he looks so pained from doing that ). “The-there’s something wrong, isn’t it? Hey—”

You tug him by the choker, and he elicits a sound that’s only reserved for your ears. You smooch him once more, and there’s no doubt that Phainon is delighted by this, with him kissing you back with a content moan, not until he whimpers, and shakily grabs your wrist. Again, he detaches himself—though it looked like he didn’t want to—so his face is still inches closer to yours. 

Breaths are intermingled, and you do everything in your power to seduce him by pecking him, but he whines, “Honey. . .”

You open your eyes, and there it is. The expression of concern plastered on his face. He’s still so hot, despite it all.

Yeah, this is not the time to admire your boyfriend.

A heavy sigh escapes you, “Can’t you just shove your tongue down my throat or vice versa until dawn?”  

Phainon suppresses a snort. He caresses your face. “Tempting, but no. Not now. Honey, you clearly have something on your mind.” 

You pout, “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“But you’re not feeling like yourself, and that breaks my heart,” he admits. His thumb slowly rubs your skin. “For the past few days or so, you haven’t acting like you usually do. I apologize that I only took action now in spite of me already realizing what was happening that early, but you were always gone and I assumed that these were just mere inconveniences that would easily go away, but clearly it did not. Now that we’re free, I can—”

Already aware of where he is heading to, you sigh again, “Don’t feel guilty. These are my issues, Phainon.”

He dips his head down. “I know.” He refuses to meet your gaze, and the organ in your chest sinks at the sight. “But I can’t really help it.”

Your boyfriend is wonderful. Yes, this is now the time to admire your boyfriend, because he’s just so kind, so wonderful, so thoughtful—and this may be an exaggeration, but he honestly deserves the world. He deserves all the good things from all the shit he has gone through. You’ve seen how he shattered and how he picked himself back up, and a part of you doesn’t really want him to bear the challenges you face, especially when he had been through so much that was perhaps a hundred times worse.

But he’s stubborn. Very much so. Huffing, he lifts his head and grumbles, “We’re not kissing again, not until you tell me what’s wrong.”

You stare at him, with wide eyes and parted lips. Did he just—oh. He’s dead serious. Determination emanates from him, and by the way, it’s still so hot, yet you can’t believe what you’ve just heard. “You’re kidding.”

“I’m not,” Phainon pules, and a bit of anguish reveals itself. “And this pains me more as much as it pains you because you look so beautiful underneath me I really want to ravish you until dawn. But taking care of you comes first, and I want to remind you that I’m your boyfriend, and you can tell me everything.”

“Phainon, you ravishing me until dawn is already taking care of me, to be honest.”

He gasps, “Not today, you deceiver! That won’t work on me! Now, open up!”

Your mouth quirks upward. Okay. You should have a little fun with this, then. “My mouth so I can suc—”

“No!! Honey, come on! Don’t do this!!”

As Phainon continues to whine from above you, you can’t help but snicker. Oh. Your stupid tears are welling up again, and sooner or later, you would break your own rule of not wanting to burden Phainon.

But is it really so bad?

He is your boyfriend, after all. And if he had problems of his own, you'd want to know, too.

His arms cage on both sides of your head, and man, he really is so hot. You definitely did not zoom in on his biceps.

Going back, what is happening now? Ah, yes. Phainon’s currently admonishing you about your strategy of sweeping him off by the feet ( metaphorically, because you physically cannot carry him or else you’d get squashed — though that seems like a fortunate way to ascend to the heavens honestly ), before claiming that it will be futile starting this second since he has caught on.

“Do you really not want to share it with me?” He asks, with his lips pursed. And with a small voice, he asks again, “Do. . . do you not trust me?”

You pinch the side of his eye glasses, before taking it off. “That’s not it.” He makes no sound, and merely waits for your next move. “That’s not it at all, Phainon.”

Phainon shortens the distance between the two of you—his chest pressing onto yours. “Then, help me understand?” His hold on you tightens, and you sense his anxiety. And this is really what you wanted to avoid all along. “Please?”

“Phainon.”

“. . .”

He does not say anything anymore, and you just know that he really is serious. Wanting to calm his nerves, you give him a soft smile. “Okay. Though you have to promise me that once I let it out, you’ll have to commit to what you just said earlier.”

Phainon tilts his head. “Which is?” “You ravishing me until dawn.”

He explodes in a darker red. The white-haired man on top of you sputters, “You’re still onto that!? Honey!”

“Are you not?” “Well, yes, I am–but—mmph!”

You just kiss him again.

Maybe it really is not so bad to share your troubles with Phainon. This is just how it works, doesn’t it? It’s better to be honest now instead of keeping it all in.

When you pull away, Phainon’s a bit dazed, and you chuckle.

“We have a deal, then.”

( You do make a mental note to not overshare everything though. You just hope Phainon won't delve too much into the inconsistencies and holes in your story.