BurglarOfTurts

As he’s wandering around, looking for his next meal, Atsushi spots a group of pirates loading supplies from a warehouse. One of the barrels contains fresh fruit, apples, and Atsushi’s mouth begins to water at the sight of it. It’s been so long since he’s had fresh fruit. And apples are one of his favorites. He’s only had them a few times, but he’ll never forget that delightfully crunchy sweetness.

Atsushi looks over to the warehouse, noticing a distinct lack of security. He might be about to make a very bad decision.

When the coast is clear, he makes his way towards the warehouse and slips inside. No one notices, or if they do, they don’t say anything. Either way, Atsushi knows he needs to be quick, he doesn’t know when someone will show up.

He flits around, checking the crates and barrels, searching for those apples. He just needs one, that’s it. He won’t ask for more.

Soon enough, he finds it. The lid of the barrel he lifts reveals it to be half full of that delectable fruit. Atsushi reaches in and grabs one, admiring its shiny red color and firm texture. It’s not even bruised. Atsushi takes a bite before he can stop himself. Flavor bursts on his tongue, a little tart but mostly sweet, and Atsushi has to hold back a noise of delight.

So distracted by the delicious fruit, he doesn’t notice the footsteps approaching until they’re almost upon him.

Panicking, Atsushi dives into the barrell of apples, sliding the lid back over the top when he’s inside. Atsushi has never been more grateful for his scrawniness. It’s a tight fit, but somehow it works. Hopefully, whoever it is will just walk past and then he can book it out of here.

Unfortunately, lady luck is not smiling down on him. The barrel he’s in is picked up and starts moving. Atsushi stays stock still, absolutely terrified. Should he make a break for it before they can take him somewhere else? But if he struggles, he’ll be dropped and he’d be caught before he could make his escape. It won’t exactly be easy to hop right out of the barrel with how wedged into it he is.

Though he doesn’t like it, he figures the best choice is to wait until the barrel is put down. The only problem is that this barrel is almost definitely being taken to a ship, most likely one full of pirates.

After a bit of walking, he’s carried down some stairs and then the barrel is set down with a grunt. The person who carried him leaves, footsteps heading back up the stairs.

Atsushi listens closely. He can hear muffled voices and footsteps coming from above him, but nothing that sounds like it’s in the same room as him. Holding his breath, he carefully raises the lid of the barrel the tiniest bit to see out. He’s met with curved wooden walls and his heart sinks. He’s really on a ship.

After double checking that no one is in sight, Atsushi heaves himself out of the barrel as quietly as he can. It’s a bit of a struggle, but he succeeds, only narrowly keeping himself from tipping it over. Once he’s free, he inspects his surroundings.

This is clearly some sort of storage area. There’s spools of rope and lots of other crates and barrels filled with who knows what, Atsushi has no plans to find out. He needs to get off this boat before it leaves. That would be easy if he didn’t have to worry about being seen.

As he’s thinking about what he can do, he hears a commotion above him.

“You didn’t check before bringing it on board?! Why can’t you ever do your job properly?!” a voice shouts, muffled by the deck between it and Atsushi. There must be some sort of reply too quiet for Atsushi to hear because the previous voice lets out a yell of frustration, “you’re insufferable! I’ll do it myself!”

Footsteps stomp around above Atsushi, heading towards the stairs. Atsushi jumps, realizing he needs somewhere to hide, and quickly. He searches the room frantically, but there’s nowhere that he wouldn’t immediately be found.

Before he can lose himself to panic, he catches sight of something that looks like a panel in the wall, just big enough to crawl into. With no other options, he starts messing with it, trying to see if he can open it, all too aware of the footsteps getting ever closer.

Finally, he hears a click and it swings open. Atsushi throws himself into the space, closing the door as quietly as he can. Just in time, as he can hear whoever was coming down enter the room. He’s grumbling to himself but Atsushi can’t make out the words. Atsushi holds his breath as he hears rustling and things shifting around, hoping that he’s not discovered.

After some more rummaging, the footsteps leave, going back up the stairs. Atsushi quietly releases his breath, grateful that he wasn’t noticed. He doesn’t have long to feel relief as that same voice shouts again.

“Raise the anchor, we’re setting off!”

Atsushi’s heart stops. No, no, no. He can’t be stuck here! On a ship! Full of pirates!

He was supposed to have time to get off before they left. He doesn’t want to be a stowaway! There’s no way he won’t be caught before they dock again!

This is how he dies. All because he wanted an apple.

Chapter 2

Surprisingly, Atsushi isn’t dead yet.

It’s been a few days since he accidentally stowed away. The little nook he hid himself in turned out to be part of a series of hidden passages that run all around the ship. They clearly still see some use considering they’re not completely full of dust and cobwebs, but he hasn’t seen anyone in them since he’s been here. He’s spent practically all his time hiding out in them, only leaving to relieve himself and to get fluids. He’s careful to only take what he needs and hasn’t dared touch the food, afraid that the pirates will notice.

Which leads him to his current predicament of his hunger battling his fear.

He thinks he would be able to get away with sneaking some food. Even if they do realize that food is missing, they’d probably think people were just eating more and not immediately jump to assuming that someone is hiding on the ship. But they could, and that would drastically raise his chances of being caught.

Atsushi doesn’t necessarily need the food just yet. He’s gone longer without food before. He’s used to the feeling of his stomach cramping, the hunger pains, the light-headedness. But he worries he’ll get sloppy if he goes much longer without any sort of sustenance. It’s hard enough staying hidden from a ship full of pirates. Trying to do it while he’s shaky and weak and nauseaus with hunger is asking for them to discover him.

He makes his move during the night, when most of them should be sleeping. He cracks open the small door and surveys the area. No one is in sight. He can hear some snoring from nearby, the sleeping area only separated by a thin wall and open doorway.

Atsushi moves swiftly and quietly across the room to where the food is kept. He opens the door and pauses, ears catching the sound of footsteps approaching. Very close footsteps approaching. How did he not hear someone getting up?

He throws himself into the pantry and closes the door before he can think better of it. Cramped into the small space, he begs for them to be going somewhere else. His pleas go unheard as the footsteps creep ever closer, until they stop right outside the door.

The door opens, dim light filling the cupboard. A man stands there, shorter than Atsushi, with short black hair and bright green eyes that briefly lock with Atsushi’s. Atsushi’s eyes are wide with fear and rimmed with tears as his heart thunders in his chest, adrenaline and fear coursing through him. He briefly debates making a run for it past him, but there’s nowhere to go even if he did. He’s been caught and he can kiss his life goodbye. Maybe he can at least beg for mercy, plead his case, something so that he won’t be killed.

Before he can start stammering out apologies and explanations and pleas, the pirate lets out a short laugh. He looks away from Atsushi and grabs something off a shelf. Then, he shuts the door and Atsushi hears him walking away.

Atsushi stays frozen, stunned. He’s not getting drug out of his hiding place and taken to the captain who will make him walk the plank, or stab him, or shoot him, or hang him?

He’s… safe?

No, that can’t be right. That pirate is probably going to get the captain now. Atsushi needs to hide again. He hurries out of the pantry and rushes back to the secret passage. Only realizing once he gets there that he forgot to bring the food he originally came out for. He doesn’t go back for it, the scare thoroughly killing his apetite.

Atsushi waits for the storm of pirates, knowing it’s only a matter of time until he’s caught and punished however they see fit.

He waits.

And waits.

And waits.

Eventually, dawn breaks without anything happening. The crew sets about their day without a whisper of someone hiding out. No one comes looking for him.

He’s been discovered. Shouldn’t he have been captured and thrown in a cell or murdered by now? Did the pirate who caught him not tell anyone? Is he actually safe? Atsushi can’t truly believe it. But, whatever the case, all he can do is keep hiding and hope he can make it through this without losing his life.

That night, as Atsushi is trying to settle himself down to sleep, still uneasy and painfully hungry thanks to his failed attempt of getting food yesterday and unwillingness to try again now that someone has discovered him, his fear is proven right. Someone approaches his hiding place, putting Atsushi on high alert.

He spends his nights in the passage next to the storage area, somewhere that the pirates don’t show up on a regular basis, and shouldn’t have any need to this late at night. Atsushi didn’t hear anyone calling for supplies because something broke. And whoever is here isn’t getting anything. Atsushi doesn’t hear any rummaging around, just an eerie silence once the footsteps stop.

“Hey. I know you’re there,” a voice calls out. Atsushi stops breathing as dread fills him. There’s nowhere to run and he can’t hide forever.

Maybe they’re just bluffing. Or maybe it’s the pirate that saw him earlier and he just wants to talk.

Atsushi knows that’s wishful thinking. The reality is that he’s about to get murdered.

Maybe he could steal a dinghy. Do they have a dinghy on this ship? He hasn’t explored past the passages he’s been hiding in, but with a ship this size, he’d think they would. Although, if he actually stole one, he’d likely die of starvation before he could get anywhere with it.

So, his options are die by the hand of pirates or slowly wither away alone at sea.

Except he definitely wouldn’t be able to successfully get away on a dinghy. He’d be caught immediately and then killed.

So, his options are die by the hand of pirates or die by the hand of pirates. He doesn’t like those options.

Begging for mercy is still on the table. Maybe these are kind pirates. After all, they waited this long to say anything. Atsushi can’t see any reason for that. Unless they were waiting for him to give himself up. Maybe they would have spared him if he admitted his transgressions and apologized.

Atsushi’s stomach chooses that moment to growl comically loud. Atsushi cringes at the noise. Now he’s really done for. He can’t pretend any more. He has to face them.

Atsushi takes a deep breath, suppressing the urge to throw up as he hesitantly opens the door. He slowly exits his hiding place and looks towards the person waiting for him. The lighting in the ship is dim, but it’s more than enough to make them out.

All thoughts of this being a merciful pirate crew fly out the window as he realizes who he’s looking at.

“There’s my little stowaway!” Dazai Osamu says with a grin as he throws his arms out, single eye glinting in the low light.

Dazai Osamu. The Black Wraith. One of the most notorious and feared pirates this side of the world. He quickly rose to infamy a few years ago, rumored to have murdered the previous captain and his entire crew singlehandedly. He takes no prisoners and shows no mercy. If you cross him, you won’t live long enough to regret it. He’s an evil, ruthless killer.

And maybe that’s not who Atsushi is staring at.

Studying him closer, Atsushi starts to doubt his initial assumption. His look, the long black coat, eyepatch, and dark hair, certainly matches what’s said of the legendary Dark Wraith. But his countenance is nothing like Atsushi imagined. He’s not very intimidating, sitting on the floor with a bright smile, looking at Atsushi like he’s a friend.

Though he’s not the most intimidating, Atsushi can tell that he’s the one in charge. No regular crew member would wear a coat like that, long and clearly high quality, decorated with shiny black buttons and lined with red.

“Come eat! You must be starving,” Dazai Osamu(?) says, gesturing to the plate across from him.

Now, Atsushi is aware that he shouldn’t put much stock in rumors, they’re hardly ever true, often exaggerated, and don’t always make sense. And it’s not even that he thinks all the rumors about Dazai Osamu are accurate, but shouldn’t a pirate captain, regardless of if he’s Dazai Osamu or not, be more intimidating?

“Are you Dazai Osamu?” Atsushi blurts. He resists the urge to slap his hands over his mouth or close his eyes and instead clenches his hands at his sides as fear pierces through him. He can’t believe that slipped out. He might be curious, but that’s not something he needs to ask. Whether he’s Dazai Osamu or not doesn’t matter, he’s still someone who could easily kill him. If Atsushi’s wrong, it won’t possibly end well. And if he’s right, it still won’t end well. Dazai Osamu isn’t known for his kindness.

“I am indeed! And who are you, little stowaway?” Dazai Osamu(!) replies breezily.

“Nakajima Atsushi,” Atsushi answers faintly. He feels a little lightheaded, and not just because of the hunger. It’s not possible that this is happening. There’s no way that he’s talking to Dazai Osamu. That Dazai Osamu is being friendly(?) with him. Someone who could very well be here for nefarious reasons.

Maybe he’s just treating Atsushi nice before interrogating and imprisoning him. Or killing him.

Or maybe Dazai Osamu is just nicer than the rumors. Atsushi should think positive. Especially if he really is about to be murdered. He should enjoy the last few minutes of his life as much as he can.

“Come, Atsushi-kun. Eat some food,” Dazai Osamu says, waving him over again. Atsushi obeys this time and gingerly settles himself on the floor across from Dazai Osamu.

“Shouldn’t you be locking me up or throwing me overboard?” Atsushi asks, unable to believe that there won’t be any repercussions for him stowing away. And if it’s going to happen, why not go ahead and get it over with? He doesn’t want to wait in suspense for his fate to be decided.  

“Why would I do that?” Dazai Osamu asks with a tilt of his head.

“Because I’m a stowaway?” Atsushi says. Is that not something to get in trouble for? He thought pirates wouldn’t take kindly to that.

“That’s hardly a punishable offense when it was an accident,” Dazai Osamu replies easily.

“How are you so sure it was an accident?” Atsushi thinks he shouldn’t be so flippant about this. What if Atsushi was here to kill him? Or wreck his ship? Or steal from him? Or do some other awful thing?

And why does Atsushi care? Dazai Osamu’s safety has nothing to do with him. If he doesn’t want to treat a possibly deadly situation seriously, it’s none of Atsushi’s business. Atsushi should be more concerned with his own problems, like the fact that he’s trapped on a pirate ship with Dazai Osamu with no way of knowing what’s going to happen to him.

“No offense, but no one would use you as a spy or assassin. You didn’t do a great job of hiding. And you don’t seem like you’re a strong fighter,” Dazai Osamu says with a smirk, giving Atsushi a once over. Atsushi blushes at the criticism, feeling indignation rise in him.

“I’ll have you know that I’m a perfectly capable fighter,” Atsushi says. It might be a bit of an exaggeration, but he’s been in more than his fair share of tussles and never comes out worse for wear than his opponents. Is he great at fighting? No. He was never taught, and he prefers to avoid fighting if he can, but he’s stronger than he looks and he can protect himself well enough.

“Be that as it may, you’re clearly not here to cause harm. You haven’t made any sort of move the whole time you’ve been here. There have been many opportunities that you could’ve used to attempt to kill me, but none were taken. You haven’t touched the supplies. You haven’t explored anywhere outside of the secret passages. You haven’t planted anything. You didn’t even realize whose ship you were on until you saw me,” Dazai Osamu coolly explains, eye narrowed at Atsushi as he lays out his analysis.

Atsushi is reminded just who he’s sitting in front of, pinned in place by that gaze, feeling exposed, like Dazai Osamu can see straight into his soul. His heart races, trying to beat out of his chest. The moment hangs, tension frozen in the air as they stare at each other.

Abruptly, Dazai Osamu’s expression returns to the jovial smile he had before and Atsushi feels like he can breathe again. He takes back everything he thought about Dazai Osamu not being intimidating or taking things seriously. He’s clearly very capable and knows how to be serious.

“Now, eat,” Dazai Osamu says, pushing the food closer to Atsushi.

“Thank you for the food,” Atsushi says, unsure if he’ll be able to eat after that.

His worries are unfounded, as he immediately starts scarfing it down as soon as the first bite hits his tongue, complety forgetting his current situation and earlier fear. This might be the best thing he’s ever eaten. Well, it’s really not. But after not eating anything for so long, he could eat sand and find it delectable.

Atsushi eats quickly, probably too quickly, and is jolted back to reality as he looks up from his empty plate to be met with one bright brown, almost red, eye watching him intently.

Right, notorious pirate captain that could easily kill him. Atsushi doubts that’s his plan. Atsushi isn’t seen as a threat, so Dazai Osamu feels no need to kill him or imprison him. Then, what will he do with Atsushi?

“From now on, make sure you eat everyday. I can’t have a member of my crew going hungry,” Dazai Osamu says with a smile.

What?

“What?”

“You can sleep in the passages like you’ve been doing, but tomorrow, you’ll be joining the crew in the communal sleeping area,” he continues over Atsushi as he stands up.

“What?” the word is barely audible even to Atsushi, but he can’t stop it from escaping.

“Be up bright and early, I’ll introduce you to everyone in the morning. Well then, good night! Sleep well!” Dazai Osamu finishes, leaving with a wave. Atsushi sits there dumbfounded.

What the fuck just happened?

Chapter 3

Atsushi barely sleeps a wink. He stays wide awake, mind racing with thoughts of what will happen to him in the morning. Dazai Osamu let him stay, but how will the rest of the crew feel about that? Atsushi doubts they’ll be so accepting. Though, he didn’t think Dazai Osamu would let him stay with a meal and a smile and look what happened. But even if he is accepted, he doesn’t know anything about ships or pirating. What if they throw him overboard because he’s incompetent?

Eventually, morning comes. The sun is barely peeking over the horizon when Atsushi decides to get up. He checks that he’s alone where he’s exiting and quickly slips out of the secret passage. He hesitantly makes his way to the deck, wondering what will come of this.

Nothing good, apparently. Someone is on him as soon as he emerges. His arms are twisted behind his back by someone much stronger than him. Atsushi winces at the rough treatment, but doesn’t fight them. He’s the intruder here and resisiting is only likely to make it worse.

“You’re coming with me,” the stranger says. Atsushi nods without saying a word. He’s led to the captain’s quarters in silence. Upon arriving, his captor starts banging on the door.

“Wake up, you lazy bum! We have a situation!” he yells. Atsushi realizes he recognizes the voice. It’s the same one who was yelling when Atsushi first arrived, who came to check the supplies where Atsushi was hiding.

Some shuffling comes from inside before the door opens, revealing a disheveled Dazai Osamu.

“What is it, Kunikida-kun?” he asks through a yawn, eye barely open and hair mussed.

“We have a rat. What should we do with him?” Atsushi’s captor, Kunikida, asks. The captain becomes wide awake at that, fully processing the situation.

“He’s not a rat! He’s our newest recruit: Atsushi-kun!” he says, grinning brightly. Kunikida lets out a long-suffering sigh and releases his grip on Atsushi. Atsushi steps away, rubbing his wrists that were held so tightly. He looks over to see his captor.

Kunikida is tall, with blond hair and a shiny pair of spectacles. He doesn’t look it at first glance, but Atsushi is now well aware of how strong he is.

“You can’t just get new recruits without letting me know, Dazai,” Kunikida scolds. Atsushi tenses, expecting the captain to retaliate at the disrespect.

“Yes, I can. I’m the captain!” Dazai Osamu chirps, seemingly unbothered by Kunikida’s words.

“For some reason,” Kunikida mutters.

“Kunikida-kun, go bring everyone to the deck so I can introduce Atsushi-kun to them,” Dazai Osamu says. Still, the fearsome pirate captain doesn’t acknowledge the disrespect. Atsushi wonders if this is a common occurrence. Maybe Kunikida is high ranking or something.

“Yes, captain,” Kunikida says with a roll of his eyes before leaving, muttering under his breath as he goes.

“We’ll go wait on the deck while he does that,” Dazai Osamu says, slinging an arm across Atsushi’s shoulders. Atsushi starts at the contact, but doesn’t try to shrug him off. Partially out of fear and partially because it feels nice. Atsushi doesn’t experience a lot of physical contact that’s not painful. It’s a nice change. Sure, it’s a little awkward and Atsushi doesn’t know what’s happening, but he appreciates the friendly gesture. At least, he’ll choose to see it as a friendly gesture.

“Um, thank you for letting me stay, Dazai Osamu-san,” Atsushi says. He’s still not sure how to feel about his situation. He’s grateful that he wasn’t instantly murdered, of course, but he doesn’t think he’ll make a very good pirate. And he doesn’t know if he wants to. Regardless, he should show his gratitude for being allowed to live.

“You’re welcome. And don’t use my whole name. Just call me Dazai. Or captain,” Dazai replies.

“Yes, Dazai-san,” Atsushi says hesitantly. It feels strange not referring to him by his full name, but it’s what he asked. Atsushi would feel stranger not doing it. It’s just something he’ll have to get used to. Since this is his life now, apparently.

Dazai takes Atsushi to the deck, where a few people are already waiting.

A woman with bright red hair in two braids who is eyeing Atsushi critically and a man with dark, shaggy hair covering his eyes who is fiddling with a journal in his hands. Atsushi waves uncertainly with a nervous smile. The woman’s eyes narrow and the man makes no acknoweldgement of him.

“Good morning!” Dazai says.

“This is the new recruit?” the woman asks.

“Yes! I’ll wait for introductions until everyone is here,” Dazai replies, ignoring her lack of greeting. Atsushi thought the disrespect would be limited to Kunikida, but maybe not. Does everyone treat Dazai like this? He thought the captain, especially a captain like Dazai, would be more feared than disrespected. Though he carries himself lightly and acts flippant, Atsushi saw last night that he’s perfectly competent and terrifying if he wants to be. Atsushi doubts that the crew isn’t aware of this and yet they don’t treat him like he is.

“Everyone! This is Atsushi-kun! Our newest recruit!” Dazai announces, moving Atsushi in front of himself, when Kunikida has gathered everyone. A few people give half-hearted greetings. Someone yawns. Atsushi tries not to cringe.

“Where’s your enthusiasm?!” Dazai asks.

“It’s too early for that,” someone says. Dazai sighs.

“Well, I’ll introduce everyone to you one by one, Atsushi-kun,” Dazai turns his attention to Atsushi instead. Atsushi nods, nervous for how he’ll be received.

“First, Kunikida-kun! The uptight one who can’t take a joke,” Dazai says, gesturing to Kunikida.

“Sorry about earlier. It’s nice to properly meet you,” Kunikida says with a nod to Atsushi, making no acknowledgement of Dazai’s words. Atsushi hurries to wave it off.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s nice to meet you, too,” Atsushi replies. He can tell that Kunikida is the stern type, but he doesn’t seem unkind.

“Next, Yosano-san! The doctor with a sadistic streak,” Dazai says, gesturing to a woman with medium length dark hair adorned with a butterfly pin.

“Don’t mind him, I’ll take good care of you if you get hurt,” she says with a smirk.

“Thank you,” Atsushi replies, gulping. He thinks he maybe he should mind Dazai. That smirk does not inspire confidence in her words. He’ll do his best to not get hurt, not eager to find out who’s telling the truth.

“Next, Ranpo-san! The one with a sweet tooth and no sense of direction,” Dazai says, moving Atsushi to the next person in line. Atsushi blanches, recognizing this as the man who caught him trying to take food. Ranpo smiles. Dazai looks back and forth between the two of them before landing on Ranpo with a questioning gaze. Ranpo laughs.

“Good luck,” he says to Atsushi.

“Thank you?” Atsushi replies. Good luck with what? Living on a ship? Being a pirate? Just, in general? He gets the feeling that there’s a hidden meaning to Ranpo’s words, but he has no idea what it could be.

“Next, Gin! The melee weapons master,” Dazai says. Gin has short black hair and a scarf wrapped around the lower half of her face. She gives him a nod, grey eyes piercing through him. Atsushi returns the nod. Dazai pulls him to the next person.

“Next, Poe! The coward with a Ranpo obssession,” Dazai says. Poe is the man who was already on deck when Dazai and Atsushi first arrived. He’s still fidgeting with his journal, clearly nervous.

“Welcome,” he says quietly, inclining his head to Atsushi.

“Thank you,” Atsushi replies.

“Next, Lucy! The snarky one who loves to cook,” Dazai says. Lucy is the red head that was evaluating Atsushi earlier.

“I don’t love to cook. I just do it the most because no one else is any good at it,” Lucy clarifies. She looks Atsushi up and down. Searching for something, Atsushi supposes. Eventually, she stops and makes eye contact with Atsushi as she speaks.

“Try not to get yourself killed, Atsushi. This kind of life isn’t easy,” she says. Atsushi wonders if she thinks he’s not capable.

“I’ll do my best,” Atsushi replies. He’s well aware that piracy is dangerous. He never would have chosen it for himself, but it’s where he is now. So, he’ll learn and he’ll live.

“Next, Junichiro and Naomi! You’ll never find one without the other,” Dazai says, gesturing to a pair of people wrapped up in each other. Junichiro is a young man with short red-blond hair and Naomi is a young woman with long black hair. Naomi is hugging one of Junichiro’s arms, pressed right up against him.

“Welcome to the crew!”

“Welcome aboard!”

They both speak at the same time, giving him matching smiles before Naomi pouts.

“We were supposed to say the same thing,” she says.

“Sorry,” Junichiro replies, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I’m going to have to punish you for this,” she says with a smirk, completely ignoring Atsushi and Dazai. Junichiro’s face turns red as he starts stammering and Atsushi can feel his own face heating up at the implication.

“Next, Michizou! The former newest recruit who likes to act tough even though we all saw him baby talking a stray cat,” Dazai says, hurriedly pulling Atsushi along. Michizou has short red hair and a bandage across his nose. He gives Atsushi a crooked grin, unphased by Dazai’s words.

“I’m glad to not be the newest anymore. Welcome aboard,” he says.

“Thank you,” Atsushi replies.

“Last, but certainly not least, myself! Your wonderful, charming, charismatic captain, Dazai Osamu!” Dazai says, posing dramatically and giving Atsushi a wink.

“The slacker with a tacky outfit who has no depth perception,” Kunikida calls. Chuckles resound through the crowd and Atsushi doesn’t hold his breath for the reprimand that doesn’t come, realizing that they’re just joking around. The whole crew feels more like a group of friends than something more hierarchal like Atsushi expected.

 Dazai clutches a hand over his heart like he’s been dealt a massive blow.

“Kunikida-kun,” he calls weakly, falling down to a knee. Atsushi has to fight to keep from laughing, unsure if it’s welcome from him. Dazai falls all the way to the ground, making wounded noises as he goes, before going limp, pretending to be dead. Atsushi can’t hold it in at that and a laugh escapes him. One of Dazai’s eyes cracks open and he smiles at Atsushi, assuring Atsushi that it’s fine.

Dazai gets up and returns to Atsushi’s side.

“Now, it’s time for a tour!” he exclaims, throwing an arm around Atsushi’s shoulders again. Atsushi leans into it a little bit this time, suddenly feeling much better about his situation.

“Are you coming with us, Kunikida-san?” Atsushi asks, noticing him walking over.

“Yes. I know he won’t actually explain anything, so I’ll do it for him. There’s plenty you’ll need to learn now that you’re on the crew,” Kunikida says. Atsushi nods.

“Thank you. I’ll be in your care,” he says.

Atsushi is lead through the whole ship from the hold to the helm with Kunikida providing helpful information and Dazai providing not so helpful commentary. Not even five minutes in, Atsushi’s head is already spinning with everything he’s being told. He’s not sure he’ll be able to remember everything he needs to.

“That concludes the tour! Now, I have captain things to do. Kunikida-kun will show you the ropes,” Dazai says. He’s gone before Atsushi can get a word out. Kunikida sighs. Atsushi has already become familiar with the sound.

“Let’s get to work,” Kunikida says, the light glinting sinisterly off of his spectacles as he adjusts them. Atsushi gulps. A chill races down his spine as a terrible premonition comes over him; his life just got a lot harder.

Chapter 4

Atsushi’s premontion turns out to be correct. Life is harder.

A few days have passed since he officially joined the crew. And every one of those days has been filled with nonstop work and learning.

Even though he’s learned a lot in the short time he’s been officially on the crew, he hasn’t been taught everything he needs to. One thing that hasn’t come up yet that he’s nervous about is sword fighting.

The first day, Kunikida gave him a spare sword. He told Atsushi not to try anything with it unless it’s a life or death situation until someone shows him how to properly use it. In the meantime, if any fighting happens, he should just run and hide. Atsushi likes and hates that plan. He doesn’t enjoy the thought of hurting anyone, but it’s a skill he’ll need now that he’s a pirate. A decision he had no say in.

He thought he’d be more upset about it, but though life has been harder in some ways, it’s also been easier in others. He doesn’t have to worry about food and he has people that he can tentatively call friends. Or at least friendly acquaintances. Everyone has been kind to him. He’s enjoyed getting to be around people that don’t treat him horribly.

What he’s enjoyed the most, and what’s surprised him the most, is the fact that he’s gotten close with Dazai.

At first, Atsushi thought Dazai was just hanging around to monitor the new recruit. He was kind of worried that Dazai was looking for a reason to kick him off, despite knowing that wouldn’t make any sense considering Dazai didn’t give him a choice in becoming a crew member. He wouldn’t then immediately try to find a reason to get rid of him, but Atsushi was still uneasy.

Atsushi quickly learned that wasn’t the case at all as the most Dazai would do when he fucked up was laugh at him before helping him out. Atsushi doesn’t know why Dazai spends so much time with him, but he can say that he likes it.

It’s not a thought he could have ever imagined having. He enjoys the company of Dazai Osamu? The same Dazai Osamu who’s said to have killed hundreds and never shown remorse or mercy? Who is black as night and pure evil?

Though, Atsushi hasn’t seen any evidence of those rumors. Dazai isn’t evil and sinister. He’s carefree and complains about working. He plays pranks and loves to give Kunikida a hard time. He’s kind and fun to be around.

Atsushi knows he hasn’t seen Dazai in action yet. There hasn’t been any raiding or fighting since he’s been on the ship. Maybe Dazai is merciless and kills indiscriminately like people say. Maybe he’s done awful things and feels no remorse.

But Atsushi can’t make himself believe that. What he’s seen of Dazai is what he chooses to believe. And what he’s seen is good. Rumors and stories are irrelevant. Dazai is good to him and good to his crew and that’s what matters to Atsushi.

A yawn suddenly comes over Atsushi. He’s so tired. And yet, tonight, he couldn’t sleep. Instead, he’s up on the deck, admiring the midnight scenery as he thinks about his strange new life.

The moon is full and bright. It reflects off the waves that are beating tirelessly against the ship. They’re stronger than usual tonight, rocking the boat harshly. Atsushi hasn’t quite got used to walking around on a boat. The way the floor constantly moves under his feet still throws him off, especially when the waves are rougher like this.

Another yawn escapes Atsushi and he wonders if he should head back to bed. He’s been up here for a while. Maybe now he’ll be able to fall asleep.

Atsushi gets up from where he was sitting with his back against the railing. His eyes slip closed as he stretches and yawns once again.

“Lovely night, isn’t it?” Dazai’s voice comes from right in front of him and Atsushi jumps, eyes widening in surprise as he steps back, bumping into the railing. At the same time, a particularly strong wave hits, making the boat lurch. Atsushi, still off balance, falls backwards. He doesn’t have time to think as he goes tumbling over the edge and towards the ocean.

The air is knocked from his lungs as he hits the icy water and he barely keeps himself from inhaling it. He tries to push himself to the surface, arms and legs flailing frantically. Somehow, it works and his head meets air. Before he has time to take a breath, a wave crashes over him, sending him back under.

His lungs burn with the lack of oxygen as he starts to panic. He continues trying to breach the surface, moving even more frantically, but it doesn’t work. No matter how desperately he struggles, he can’t find air again.

Just as he’s starting to think that this is how he dies, something wraps around his middle and he’s pulled. He thrashes harder, trying to get it off of him, until he recognizes that it’s an arm pulling him. Someone is helping him. Atsushi stops fighting and instead kicks his legs to help propel them as he’s guided.

In moments, his head is above water and he’s able to take in sweet, sweet air. He coughs, expelling the water he inhaled.

“Grab on,” Dazai’s says. Atsushi opens his eyes, finding himself right in front of the ship’s ladder. He latches onto it and starts climbing. He scurries to the middle of the deck when he makes it up, unwilling to be anywhere near the edge after that. Dazai comes up right after him.

“You should be more careful. Drowning isn’t a great way to die,” Dazai says, walking over to Atsushi.

“I will. Thank you,” Atsushi says through heaving breaths. Atsushi knows how to swim, but he isn’t that good at it. He’s never been in the ocean when the waves are so tall and strong or when he’s panicking from having fallen. He surely would have drowned if Dazai didn’t help him.

A breeze blows and Atsushi shivers. Though the days are uncomfortably warm, the nights get chilly. It’s not a problem normally, but soaking wet like this, it feels much colder.

“Come with me,” Dazai takes Atsushi by the wrist and starts walking. Atsushi follows without resistance. He’s taken into the captain’s quarters. The one place on the ship he hasn’t been yet.

It’s spacious but not enormous, filled with shelves decorated in trinkets and prizes. There’s a desk covered in papers and a large bed next to a window looking out to sea. There’s drawers and trunks surely containing even more spoils. A curtain hangs, hiding a corner of the room.

Dazai drops Atsushi’s wrist when they enter and Atsushi waits awkwardly, watching Dazai open a drawer. He pulls out clothes and a rag and throws them at Atsushi. Atsushi barely catches them before they can hit the floor.

“Change,” Dazai says. He grabs more clothes and goes behind the curtain. Atsushi hurriedly sheds himself of his wet clothes, drying off as best he can, and puts on what Dazai gave him.

It’s a simple outfit, similar to what he was wearing before, but made of a softer fabric. Atsushi tries not to think about the fact that Dazai has almost definitely worn this before and instead focuses on how nice it is to not be in wet clothes anymore as he dries his hair.

Dazai reappears in a new outfit, scrubbing a rag over his head. He finishes and tosses the rag carelessly onto the floor, next to Atsushi’s wet clothes. Now that his face is uncovered, Atsushi can see that he doesn’t have an eyepatch on. Atsushi quickly averts his gaze, not wanting to bring attention to it.

“You can look. I wear the eyepatch to protect it, not hide it,” Dazai says easily. Atsushi debates with himself. Dazai gave him explicit permission, but it still feels like something Atsushi shouldn’t see. Too personal. But it would be rude to refuse when Dazai told him he could.

Atsushi looks back, finding Dazai much closer than he was before, standing right in front of him. Atsushi’s gaze turns upward and lands on Dazai’s right eye.

Right away, Atsushi can tell it’s different from his left. The warm brown turned milky and unfocused. The skin around it is red and irritated. A scar cuts through the top eyelid.

Before he knows it, Atsushi’s hands are on Dazai’s face, pulling it closer to him to see better.

“I’m sure you can tell, but I can’t see out of it,” Dazai says as Atsushi stares at his eye.

“Does it hurt?” Atsushi asks, inspecting it. He doesn’t know much about eye injuries so he’s not sure, but it certainly doesn’t look comfortable. Atsushi just hopes it isn’t unbearable.

“Sometimes. The sunlight makes it worse, that’s what the eyepatch is for. And it often hurts when I wake up, but it’s not constant,” Dazai replies.

“That’s good,” Atsushi says. He’s glad that the pain isn’t constant. Dazai doesn’t deserve that. It’s bad enough that he lost vision in it. If it hurt all the time as well, that would be absolutely awful.

Dazai smiles and tilts his head, bringing Atsushi’s attention to the fact that he’s practically cradling Dazai’s face. His cheeks heat up in embarrassment and he quickly pulls them away. They don’t get very far before Dazai catches his wrists and intertwines their fingers.

“Let’s go to bed,” Dazai says, gently tugging Atsushi over to the bed. Atsushi follows dumbly, stuck on the fact that Dazai’s hands are in his. They’re cold. Atsushi doesn’t know if it’s because of the impromptu dip into the ocean or if they normally are.

Dazai lets go to crawl under the covers and then pats the bed, beckoning Atsushi to join him.

“You want me to get in bed with you?” Atsushi asks. He knows that’s what’s happening. There’s no other explanation for it, but it doesn’t compute. Where did this come from? Why does Dazai want him to get in his bed?

“We’ll need to share body heat to warm up so neither of us gets hypothermia. So, we’re sleeping together,” Dazai says matter-of-factly, lifting the covers for Atsushi to get under. Atsushi knows it’s nowhere near cold enough for them to get hypothermia. He’s experienced hypothermia before and this is nothing compared to it. He’s barely cold anymore, just a little chilled.

Atsushi decides not to call him out on it. He’ll use the flimsy excuse if it means he gets to be closer to Dazai. It’s clearly what Dazai wants and Atsushi won’t lie to himself and say that he doesn’t.

Atsushi joins Dazai on the bed. As soon as he’s laying down, Dazai is completely wrapped around him. Arms and legs enveloping him like an octopus. Atsushi jolts at the suddenness as well as the temperature difference. Dazai is still quite cold. Maybe he actually is in danger of getting hypothermia. Atsushi returns the embrace, determined to warm Dazai up.

In a soft bed, covered in blankets and wrapped around each other, Atsushi feels comfortably warm in no time. He’s sure Dazai feels the same as he sighs contently, somehow snuggling even closer to Atsushi.

“Good night, Atsushi-kun,” Dazai says quietly.

“Good night, Dazai-san,” Atsushi replies, already half asleep. Before he makes it all the way there, he swears he hears Dazai whisper something that sounds like “thank you.”

Chapter 5

“We’re here for Ranpo-san’s treats, but feel free to get stuff for yourself if you want. We’ll be leaving before sundown, though. So, make it quick,” Dazai announces as they dock. The sun is already high in the sky, beating down harshly.

Ten days. Atsushi has been spending the night with Dazai for the past ten days. Every night since the first time, Dazai has found any and every excuse to drag Atsushi to bed with him. Atsushi never fights him. Though he felt awkward about it at first, he sleeps much better thanks to the actual bed and Dazai’s presence.

He’s learned that Dazai runs cold. Every time Atsushi cuddles up to him, he’s freezing. It makes Atsushi wonder if Dazai simply wants a personal heater and think Atsushi fills that role best, or if there’s more to it like there is for Atsushi.

Does Dazai want more? Does he like Atsushi the way Atsushi likes him?

These thoughts have plagued Atsushi since that first morning he woke up and realized he wanted to kiss Dazai. Atsushi thinks it’s possible. Dazai spends so much time with him and is always finding excuses to touch him. He doesn’t do that with everyone.

But Atsushi hasn’t been able to bring himself to say anything. What if he’s wrong? What if he ruins what they have? He’s happy enough just getting to spend his nights with Dazai. It’s more than he could ask for.

“We’re also here for actual supplies,” Kunikida interjects.

“Yes, but you’ve got a handle on that yourself, Kunikida-kun,” Dazai says.

“It’ll take too long if I do it all myself. You could get off your sorry ass and help, Dazai!”

“But I already have plans. Important plans,” Dazai protests.

“We’ll help you, Kunikida-san,” Junichiro volunteers himself and Naomi, who’s unsurprisingly wrapped around him, before Kunikida can really lay into Dazai. Atsushi breathes a sigh of relief. When Kunikida gets started, it’ll be a while until he stops.

“And I’ll get the medical supplies, so don’t worry about that,” Yosano adds. Atsushi wonders if he should offer his assistance as well.

“Thanks. That should be enough help,” Kunikida says. Atsushi goes to ask anyway, but the supply crew is gone before he can get a word out, leaving him to wonder what he should do. He doesn’t have long to think about it as someone grabs his arm and starts pulling him along.

“Let’s go!” Lucy says.

“Where are we going?” Atsushi asks, doing nothing to fight her. Lucy is the person he’s closest to after Dazai. She happened to catch him leaving the captain’s quarters that first morning, in the middle of his crisis. She teased him, clearly thinking they’d just had sex. Atsushi hurried to deny it and proceeded to dump the whole story along with his crisis onto her. She laughed at him, but comforted him, too. Since then, they started spending more time together and became good friends.

“I’ll show you around. I even brought money for you so you can get yourself something if you want. Or maybe something for someone special,” Lucy says with a wink. Atsushi’s cheeks warm at the implication. She loves to tease him about his crush on Dazai. Atsushi doesn’t mind, it’s in good faith, but it never fails to make him blush.

“Now, our first stop is food. You can’t go shopping without a snack first,” Lucy says, leading Atsushi to a food stall. His mouth starts watering immediately at the smell of cooking meat. Atsushi likes the food on the ship, it’s food, it keeps him alive, but it’s definitely lacking in the taste department. He’s excited to have something fresh and not preserved.

Lucy orders and pays, handing Atsushi his share. Atsushi takes a big bite, letting out a sound of delight at the flavor. It’s perfectly seasoned and juicy, tender meat.

“It’s good, right?” Lucy says.

“It’s delicious,” Atsushi replies through his full mouth

They finish their food and head out to explore. Lucy takes him to lots of places in a short time, barely letting him see everything before they’re moving onto the next stop. Despite how fast paced the venture is, Atsushi finds himself enjoying it.

He’s never been on a shopping spree before, or been able to just explore for fun, always looking for his next meal and shelter. Before he accidentally stowed away, he was always on the move, never letting himself stay in one place for too long. He didn’t want people to recognize him when he made a habit of stealing, though he only ever stole the scraps, things people were throwing out. Even then, he’d get chased and attacked for it.

So it’s nice to actually be able to check a town out without worrying about food or shelter or escape routes or who would be kindest if they caught him stealing.

“Thank you for showing me around, Lucy. I had fun,” Atsushi says as they’re heading back to the ship.

“You’re welcome. It’s too bad you didn’t find anything you wanted,” she replies.

“I don’t mind,” Atsushi says. He didn’t really look for things to buy, he just enjoyed getting to see everything. He’s glad Lucy decided to bring him along and let him experience something new.

They arrive on the ship and Atsushi is immediately swept away. Dazai grabs his arm and tugs him along. Atsushi wonders why everyone always has to pull him around. They could just ask him to come with them, he’d say yes. Though, he’s not upset about Dazai’s hands being on him.

“I have something for you, Atsushi-kun!” Dazai says, taking him to the captain’s quarters. Dazai goes to the desk and grabs something off of it. He turns around and presents Atsushi with a sword.

“I picked it out for you today! It’s about time I taught you how to use one, and I figured you should have your own instead of one of the spares. What do you think?” Dazai says, holding it out to Atsushi. Atsushi carefully takes it. The scabbard is decorated, made of leather and metal. The hand guard is a simple strip of metal, but the handle has detailing that looks like scales and the pommel is engraved with a seashell design.

“Do you like it?” Dazai asks.

“I do,” Atsushi says. The thought of using a sword still makes him somewhat nervous, but he can’t deny that it’s beautiful. He doesn’t want to think about how much it’s worth. And Dazai is giving it to him like it’s nothing.

“Thank you,” he adds.

“You’re most welcome! I’ll show you how to use it in the morning,” Dazai says.

“I look forward to it,” Atsushi replies and he mostly means it. Though he might not love the activity they’ll be doing, the fact that he’s with Dazai will make it more enjoyable.

Chapter 6

Atsushi is up before dawn, nervous about his lesson with Dazai. He slips out of bed, taking his new sword with him, and goes up to the deck. It’s quiet this early, the only sound coming from the waves hitting the hull and the ship creaking and sails blowing.

The weight of the sword on his belt is heavy and unignorable. Atsushi takes it off, holding the sword in both hands as he stares at it. He cautiously unsheathes it, the shing of the metal loud in the quiet morning. The blade is smooth and shiny and cold to the touch.

Atsushi isn’t scared of swords, but he’s very well aware of how much damage they can do, how easily they can hurt. He’s nervous about having that capability in his hands. Despite knowing that he’ll have to now that he’s a pirate, Atsushi still doesn’t want to hurt people.

But he does want to protect himself and the people he cares about. And being able to properly use a sword will make that possible. He’s determined to do well regardless of his anxiety, it’s something he needs to learn.

And he’ll be learning from the best. Dazai is well known for his skill with weapons in general. Atsushi is sure to get the hang of it with his help.

Atsushi returns his sword to his scabbard and puts it back on his waist. The sun is just starting to peek over the horizon, bathing everything in a golden glow. The others should be getting up soon.

__________

“Atsushi-kun! It’s time for your swordfighting lesson.”

True to his word, Dazai appears right after breakfast to get Atsushi. After earlier, Atsushi is less nervous about it, but his heart still skips a beat. He pushes down his nerves and follows Dazai up to the deck. Dazai takes him to a spot that’s at least mostly out of the way and open enough to actually move.

“Draw your sword,” Dazai says. Atsushi carefully pulls his sword out of its scabbard and holds it up.

“First things first, widen your stance,” Dazai says as he steps forward, delicately pushing Atsushi’s sword out of the way, and scoots Atsushi’s feet farther apart with one of his own. Atsushi resists the urge to step back, startled by his sudden closeness.

“Bend your knees. Your legs are too stiff,” Dazai steps around him and leans down to push the back of his knee with a hand. Atsushi tenses at the touch.

Now behind him, Dazai reaches around him to adjust his grip on the sword, loosely embracing Atsushi to do so. He’s saying something that Atsushi is sure is important. Unfortunately, the words go in one ear and out the other for Atsushi, too preoccupied with the feeling of Dazai pressed against him and practically holding his hand.

“There you go. Now, you’re ready to fight,” Dazai says, finally stepping away from Atsushi. Atsushi distantly takes note of how he’s positioned, trying to think properly now that Dazai isn’t invading his space.

“Come at me,” Dazai says, drawing his own sword. He settles into a proper stance with an ease and swiftness that comes from years of practice and Atsushi is in awe. It’s fascinating to see him go from loose and carefree to ready to fight in an instant.

Atsushi makes no move. Sure, he’s standing properly, but he still has no idea how to actually use this thing. What if he accidentally hurts Dazai? Or himself?

“Just take a swipe at me,” Dazai encourages. Atsushi hesitantly pulls his sword back and swings at Dazai with so little force that when Dazai blocks, it barely makes a sound.

“You can do better than that. Attack like you mean it. You won’t hurt me,” Dazai says. Atsushi readjusts his stance and swings again, trusting Dazai. Even if Atsushi fucks up, Dazai knows what he’s doing and won’t be hurt by it.

This time, a proper clang rings out as Dazai blocks.

“Better. Again,” Dazai says. Atsushi resets and strikes again. Dazai deflects instead of blocking and clearly telegraphs his return strike, giving Atsushi plenty of time to raise his own block. 

Atsushi instinctively steps back as the sword comes towards him and blocks it. Dazai steps forward and swings again. Atsushi blocks again, forced to take another step back from the weight of it.

“Make an opening. You can’t be on the defensive the whole time,” Dazai says as he continues to strike at Atsushi.

And how am I supposed to do that? Atsushi wants to ask. He still has no idea what he’s doing. Dazai didn’t actually show him how to use the sword at all. He just jumped right into it.

Thankfully, Atsushi is used to figuring things out on his own.

The next time Dazai swings at him, Atsushi attempts to deflect it instead of blocking. He somehow successfully knocks Dazai’s blade away and is able to strike back. He steps forward as he swings.

Dazai easily catches Atsushi’s blade with his own and pushes it away with such force that Atsushi stumbles, arm thrown wide. Before he has time to recollect himself, Dazai’s sword is raised to his neck.

Atsushi gulps, heart racing. It would be so easy for Dazai to kill him like this, but that’s not what Atsushi’s focusing on. All he can think about is how attractive that expression is. That triumphant and mischievous gleam in his eye paired with that irresistible smirk.

“Not bad for a first try,” Dazai says, lowering his sword. Atsushi mentally shakes himself for his thoughts. He needs to focus on the swordfighting, not how attractive Dazai is.

“Are you actually going to teach me now?” Atsushi asks. He’s not upset about the demonstration, but he’d also like to learn for real.

“I already am. You learn best by doing. I’ll give you tips as we go. Now, get back into position,” Dazai replies. Atsushi resists the urge to sigh as he carefully readjusts his stance. This is going to be a long day.

By the end of it, Atsushi is sore all over and has a permanent blush across his cheeks. Dazai kept finding reasons to touch him; fixing his stance, changing his grip, inspecting him for injuries despite Atsushi assuring him he’s fine. Atsushi can’t handle such proximity. It’s like Dazai was trying to rile him up.

Atsushi is glad when Dazai lets him go for dinner. Some space should help him clear his head. He doesn’t need to be thinking about indecent things when Dazai inevitably drags him to his room tonight. Atsushi could refuse, he doubts Dazai would force him. But he doesn’t really want to. He enjoys spending his nights with Dazai and he doesn’t want this to get in the way of that. Atsushi will get over this and the night will be like the ones before it.

Despite his resolve, Atsushi feels awkward when Dazai comes to get him that night. All too aware of the fact that they’ll be pressed up against each other. Dazai is a cuddler. Normally, Atsushi likes that, but tonight he’s afraid it’ll be a problem. Still, he follows Dazai to his room, determined to not make a big deal out of it. Nothing’s going to happen. They’re just going to sleep and everything will be fine.

Like usual, Dazai crawls into bed first and beckons Atsushi in after him. Atsushi hesitates, heart beating fast. He doesn’t falter for long, not wanting Dazai to realize that something is wrong, and shortly gets in bed as well. Immediately, Dazai latches onto him. Atsushi jumps at the sudden temperature shock. He still hasn’t gotten used to it in the time they’ve been doing this.

Though it’s startling, Atsushi doesn’t let it stop him from returning Dazai’s embrace. Settling in together, Atsushi forces himself to calm down. His heart is beating way too fast and he doesn’t want Dazai to hear it.

Dazai presses even closer, sneaking a leg between Atsushi’s. Atsushi fights not to pull away. He knows Dazai is touchy.

Dazai trails a hand up Atsushi’s back, resting it against the base of his neck. A shiver runs through Atsushi. Atsushi didn’t think he was right earlier, but now he’s starting to think Dazai really is doing this on purpose.

“What’s wrong? Your heart is racing,” Dazai whispers. Atsushi isn’t fooled by his fake concern, catching the smirk on his lips. Unwilling to keep pretending to be unaffected, Atsushi leans in and kisses him. Dazai freezes and Atsushi immediately pulls away with an apology on his tongue, fearing he’s made an awful mistake. Before he can get it out, Dazai is on top of him. Literally. Atsushi is pushed onto his back as Dazai straddles him, capturing his lips in a fierce kiss.

Dazai kisses him like he’s starved, desperate and hungry. Atsushi struggles to match his pace, overwhelmed by the intensity of it. Dazai’s tongue presses against the seam of his lips and Atsushi easily grants him entry. Dazai licks into his mouth, tongue tangling with his. Atsushi is entirely unfamiliar with the sensation, but finds that he enjoys it as Dazai leads him.

Eventually, Dazai pulls away and Atsushi gasps for air, realizing that he had been holding his breath. As Atsushi is trying to catch his breath, a hand slips under his shirt. Atsushi starts at the freezing contact, momentarily distracted.

“Sorry,” Dazai says unapologetically as his other hand joins it on Atsushi’s bare skin. Before Atsushi can think of a way to retaliate, Dazai leans down again. He trails kisses down Atsushi’s neck. Atsushi squirms at the tickly feeling. The giggle that he starts to let out abruptly turns into something much closer to a moan as Dazai latches onto the top of his collarbone and sucks.

Atsushi slaps a hand over his mouth, embarrassed. Dazai reaches up and pulls Atsushi’s hand away from his mouth. Atsushi looks down at Dazai, meeting his heated gaze. Dazai slowly pulls away, maintaining eye contact.

“There’s no need to censor yourself,” he says. Atsushi would argue that there is. Anyone on the ship could hear him if he’s too loud. He doesn’t have long to worry about that as Dazai kisses him again.

It’s slower this time, Dazai’s tongue lazily finding its way back into Atsushi’s mouth. The hand Dazai has under his shirt trails up his ribs, leaving goosebumps in its wake. Atsushi jolts when a finger brushes over his nipplie, a gasp escaping him that Dazai swallows. Dazai doesn’t linger, ghosting his hand down Atsushi’s chest, pausing when he reaches the top of his pants. He breaks the kiss, giving Atsushi a questioning gaze as his fingers dance along Atsushi’s waistband.

Atsushi nods without hesitation. He knew as soon as Dazai kissed him that this is where it would lead and he’s more than ready. Dazai smirks and a shiver runs through Atsushi. Well, he sure hopes he’s ready.

__________

The first thing he notices as he wakes is how comfortable he is. He’s laying on something soft and hugging something warm. He cuddles closer to the warmth he’s holding. Something smooth and soft and moving.

Why is it moving?

Atsushi peels his sleep-heavy eyes open and is met with bare skin.

Memories of the previous night come rushing back to him and his face heats up as he pushes himself away. Tries to, that is. It doesn’t work as Dazai tightens his hold on him.

“It’s a little late to be embarrassed now,” Dazai says chipperly. How long has he been awake? Normally, Atsushi wakes up first and has to fight to get Dazai up.

“I don’t think it is,” Atsushi replies. He was caught up in the moment last night. Now that he’s thinking clearly, he’s mortified. Though he did greatly enjoy it and he doesn’t regret it.

“Oh, are you embarrassed because of–” Atsushi hurriedly covers Dazai’s mouth with a hand. He doesn’t need to hear about his inexperience out loud. He remembers it perfectly well. Dazai laughs and pulls Atsushi’s hand away.

“You don’t need to be. We both enjoyed ourselves, didn’t we?” Dazai says.

“We did,” Atsushi agrees quietly. To be honest, he wasn’t sure that Dazai did. He’d been a little too focused on how he was feeling and not Dazai. It makes him glad to know that it was good for both of them.

“I really like you, you know,” Atsushi says, needing to get it out. After what happened last night, he can’t not tell Dazai.

“I do know. I really like you, too,” Dazai replies, smiling softly. Atsushi returns the smile, feeling light.

The trip back to his place passes in the blink of an eye. He hurries to take a quick shower and get himself dressed presentably. Something casual, but still nice. Fortunately, he decided on an outfit before today, so doesn’t accidentally spend hours deliberating on what to wear. He did that part the day Chuuya told him what he had planned for the date.

They’re going to watch a movie and have dinner. Maybe a little cliché, but Atsushi has been looking forward to this movie. The Man and The Dog is the highly anticipated sequel to one of his favorite movies, The Boy and The Puppy, about life and loss and companionship. It’s been very well received and he can’t wait to see it for himself, especially when he gets to share the experience with a fellow fan.

Once he’s dressed and ready, Atsushi heads out. There’s still about half an hour until they’re supposed to meet. He’ll probably be early, the movie theater is only about a fifteen minute walk away, but he’s too nervous to spend time waiting around at home. He can always kill time on his phone when he gets there.

Apparently, he didn’t need to worry, as he spots Chuuya immediately upon entering the building. Maybe they were both nervous.

Chuuya waves him over with a smile. Atsushi returns it as he walks up to him.

“Hi, Atsushi. You look great,” Chuuya says, looking him up and down. Atsushi smiles, cheeks heating up the slightest bit at the compliment.

“Thanks. You do, too,” Atsushi returns, taking in Chuuya’s outfit. He’s wearing designer clothes again, but they’re clearly casual. Atsushi wonders if that’s all he owns, even the exercise clothes he was wearing at the park were designer.

“Thanks. Here’s your ticket. I hope you don’t mind that I picked our seats. I bought them ahead of time,” Chuuya says, handing Atsushi a ticket.

“That’s fine. As long as you didn’t put us in the front row,” Atsushi replies. The front row is not his favorite place to sit. It’s too close to the screen for Atsushi’s taste. He doesn’t want to have to move his head to see everything that’s happening.

“Nope. We’re right in the middle,” Chuuya says as they start towards the counter to get their tickets checked.

“Good,” Atsushi nods. They hand the attendant their tickets and are given directions to the room they’ll be in along with their ticket stubs. They take them both with thanks.

“Do you wanna get any snacks?” Chuuya asks.

“Maybe just a drink since we’ll be eating after this,” Atsushi says. He does like to snack while he watches, but he wouldn’t want to spoil his apetite. And though a drink isn’t exactly a snack, it’s the next best thing.

“Sounds good,” Chuuya says. They go to the counter and each pick a drink. Chuuya pulls out his wallet, but Atsushi quickly intercepts him.

“I can buy them! You already bought the tickets,” Atsushi says. Not that he doesn’t appreciate it. He’s not exactly rolling in cash. But, Chuuya shouldn’t have to pay for everything.

“Alright,” Chuuya concedes without a fight. Atsushi pays for the drinks and then they head to their theater. They find their seats easily and get settled to watch the movie, after twenty minutes of trailers and ads.

“That was great. I think it was even better than the first one,” Atsushi says as they step out of the darkened theater.

“I don’t think you can beat the first one, but it was really good. Especially the reunion scene,” Chuuya replies.

“I know! It was so sweet!”

They continue talking about the movie as they start the walk to the restaurant they’ll be eating at. Atsushi has no idea where they’re going, all Chuuya told him was that it’s in walking distance, so he follows his lead.

Soon enough, they arrive at a nice restaurant. Atsushi almost breathes a sigh of relief. Even from just the short time he’s known him, it’s obvious that Chuuya has expensive tastes, and Atsushi is glad that he decided on a more casual place than he might have normally.

They’re seated and given menus and Atsushi’s wallet doesn’t cry at the prices. This is the kind of restaurant he’d splurge on for himself. Food is ordered and delivered to their table in no time.

They talk as they eat, exchanging little stories and fun facts about themselves. Atsushi learns that Chuuya speaks multiple languages, and shares that he knows how to tap dance.

“Thank you for inviting me out today. I’ve had a lot of fun,” Atsushi says when they’ve paid. He hasn’t been on a date in a while and was a little nervous even though he already knew he liked Chuuya, but it went even better than he thought it could have.

“I’m glad, but there’s still one more thing,” Chuuya replies with a smile.

“There’s more?” Atsushi asks. Chuuya only told him that they’d watch a movie and get dinner. What else could there be?

“Of course. I haven’t given you your gift yet. I left it in my car so we’ll have to walk to get it,” Chuuya says. All at once, Atsushi remembers that it’s his birthday.

“Lead the way,” Atsushi says quickly, hoping his shock doesn’t show on his face. He can’t believe he forgot that it’s his birthday. All he could think about during the date was how much fun he was having. It being for his birthday completely slipped his mind.

They exit the restaurant and, after a short walk, arrive at Chuuya’s car. Chuuya opens the back door and grabs a gift bag.

“Happy Birthday. I hope you like it,” Chuuya says, handing Atsushi the gift bag. Atsushi takes it carefully.

“Thank you,” Atsushi says. He pulls out the tissue paper first, revealing what he instantly recognizes as art supplies. He grabs each item one at a time to inspect them. Two new sketchbooks, one specifically for the watercolor paints also included, paint brushes, oil pastels, and colored pencils. All from expensive, high quality brands.

“I know you like to draw, and you mentioned wanting to do more with colors since you normally don’t, so I got a few different ones,” Chuuya explains as Atsushi stares dumbfounded at what he’s holding.

It’s true. When they met up a couple of days ago, Atsushi said that he wanted to try drawing more with colors. Maybe even try painting.

Normally, he just draws with a plain old number two pencil. Sometimes he’ll use charcoal, if he’s feeling fancy. He doesn’t usually bother with trying to do more, he likes his trusty pencil and paper and he’s used to it, but seeing how much Chuuya liked his sketch of Zelda made him want to take his art a bit more seriously and do more with it.

When he was a kid, he loved making the most obnoxiously colorful, clashing pictures. Probably because he was rarely allowed to use the crayons and markers, so when he did, he always used as many as he could in each piece. Which made starting with lots of colors seem like the right choice.

“Thank you,” Atsushi attempts to say, but it comes out as a whisper that Chuuya clearly doesn’t hear.

“And not to be selfish, but I really wanted to be able to see what you can make with this stuff. I’ve only seen a little bit of your work, but you’re a really good artist,” Chuuya adds. Atsushi clears his throat.

“Thank you,” Atsushi says again, trying his hardest to pretend there aren’t tears in his eyes. It’s a losing battle as they slowly make their way down his face. Very few people have seen his art and even fewer have been kind about it. This is too much. He can’t take it.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t–” Chuuya starts, worry furrowing his brow as he reaches a hand out towards Atsushi.

“This might be the best birthday I’ve ever had. Thank you so much,” Atsushi cuts him off. Chuuya’s expression gentles into a smile and he places a comforting hand on Atsushi’s back. Atsushi leans into the contact and, overwhelmed with emotion, envelops Chuuya in a hug. Before he can fling himself away as he realizes what he’s done, Chuuya has already returned the gesture, his own arms wrapped around Atsushi’s middle.

For a long time, Atsushi’s birthday was something he celebrated alone. But over the last few years, he’s actually made friends who throw him a party and have gifts and wish him a happy birthday. And now he’s on a date for his birthday, with someone he might like too much considering the amount of time they’ve known each other, and he’s had an amazing time. He couldn’t be more grateful.

“You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed it,” Chuuya says warmly to match the warmth of his embrace. Atsushi needs to pull away before he has the urge to never leave.

“And I know it’s not my birthday, but I had a pretty great time. I’d love to take you out again,” Chuuya says. Atsushi nods as he extracts himself from Chuuya with great effort.

“I’d love to go out with you again,” Atsushi says, smiling brightly.

“I’ll text you the details?”

“Sounds good. And thank you again,” Atsushi replies.

“You’re welcome again,” Chuuya says with a chuckle, watching Atsushi with soft eyes. He leans in and gives him a quick peck on the cheek. Atsushi’s face heats up at the contact, lighting up with a blush.

“Good night,” Chuuya says as he pulls back. He gives Atsushi a wink before getting into his car.

“Good night,” Atsushi returns faintly, watching as he drives off. This feels familiar.

Normally, when he’s out with Zelda for their morning jog, he doesn’t see many people. He switches up which park they go to, and sometimes they just end up on the sidewalk instead of at a park, but he makes sure to take Zelda for a jog every morning. She’s very high energy and needs lots of exercise, so it’s usually a jog every morning and evening plus playing out in the yard with her whenever he can and taking her to the dog park at least on the weekends. He also has treat puzzles for mental stimulation and he trains some tricks with her.

The morning jogs are his favorite. They’re a nice way to wake up and Zelda always has a great time. This morning’s is no different. Zelda is lively, trotting along at a steady pace with him as they go. She stays right next to him practically the whole time, more interested in moving around than sniffing.

Eventually, they’ve jogged long enough. Zelda’s clearly lost some of her previous energy and Chuuya’s worked up a sweat.

“Good work, Zelda,” Chuuya says. She, of course, doesn’t respond with anything other than panting. Chuuya grabs her collapsable bowl and fills it up with water.

“Drink up,” Chuuya says as he sets it down for her. He drinks some of his own water while she licks the bowl dry. He can feel it all the way down to his stomach, helping cool him off as it quenches his thirst.

He finishes most of the bottle and catches sight of someone on a bench nearby as he lowers it. It only takes a moment for him to realize that he recognizes who it is. He met him only once a few days ago, but he has a very distinct look. White hair cut in an unconventional style, framing wide lavender and gold eyes. It’s Nakajima sitting there, drawing in a sketchbook.

Suddenly, a gust of wind sweeps through, making it rain petals from the tree above Nakajima. Nakajima pauses in his work and looks up. A smile graces his features as he holds a hand out as if to catch them.

The contentment on his face, the delicate pink petals swirling around him, the morning light making him glow. All together, it paints a picture that takes Chuuya’s breath away.

Distracted as he is with the enchanting sight before him, Chuuya gets caught staring when Nakajima turns his head and makes eye contact.

Chuuya hurries to wave. Nakajima returns it uncertainly, clearly trying to figure out who he’s waving at. Chuuya sees the moment Nakajima recognizes him, confusion turning to cheerfulness as his wave becomes more enthusiastic.

Chuuya hadn’t been sure if he should approach. They don’t know each other well, not having texted anymore past the first exchange Chuuya initiated. But with a reaction like that, Chuuya knows it’s more than fine, and he’s glad for that. He likes the little bit he’s seen of Nakajima and would like to get to know him better.

Chuuya picks up Zelda’s bowl and leads her over to Nakajima.

“Good morning. It’s nice to see you again,” he says with a smile.

“Good morning! It’s nice to see you. And I’m glad to see that Zelda’s doing well,” Nakajima replies, smiling brightly.

“Thanks to you,” Chuuya says. He’s eternally grateful to Nakajima for reuniting him with Zelda. She’s incredibly dear to him and nowhere near old enough for him to be saying goodbye to her anytime soon. He doesn’t know what he would have done if she hadn’t been found, “I think Zelda wants to express her gratitude as well,” he adds, noticing how happy she is to see Nakajima, practically vibrating in place as her tail wags rapidly.

“Can I?” Nakajima asks with barely restrained glee, gesturing to Zelda.

“Of course,” Chuuya says with a smile, not upset in the slightest that Nakajima is more excited to see Zelda than Chuuya. She has that effect on people.

Nakajima quickly slips off the bench, crouching down to pet Zelda face to face.

“She really likes you,” Chuuya says, watching Zelda soak up the affection Nakajima is giving her, tail wagging happily. Nakajima smiles as he continues to pet her.

“I really like her, too,” he says, avoiding the tongue that keeps trying to lick his face. His dodging does nothing to deter her attempts and Chuuya laughs a little. She doesn’t normally get so excited over people other than himself.

Nakajima leans forward and wraps his arms around her.

“You’re so cute,” he says to her, giving a light squeeze. She turns her attention to sniffing the side of his head and finally gets a lick in, right on his ear. Nakajima squeaks and pulls away quickly, unstable in his crouch as he’s wiping the spit off his ear while still fighting off her advances.

Chuuya laughs and decides to intervene before she can knock him over.

“Zelda, come,” he says. She listens immediately, leaving Nakajima and returning to Chuuya’s side.

“Thanks…,” Nakajima trails off as he stands up. Chuuya quickly realizes that he never told Nakajima his name.

“Sorry. I never introduced myself. I’m Nakahara Chuuya. Just call me Chuuya,” he says.

“Thanks, Chuuya-san. You can call me Atsushi, then,” Atsushi replies.

“You can drop the ‘-san’. I don’t care for it, and I doubt I’m much older than you, anyway,” Chuuya says.

“Well, how old are you?” Atsushi asks. Chuuya glances at his watch.

“As of about seven hours ago, I’m twenty eight,” he says. Atsushi’s eyes go wide.

“It’s your birthday?” he asks. Chuuya nods.

“Happy Birthday! Sorry I don’t have a gift,” Atsushi says.

“It’s fine. I wouldn’t expect you to. Getting to see you this morning is enough of a gift,” Chuuya says with a wink. Atsushi blushes bright red and averts his gaze.

“Ah! Actually, I do have something I can give you,” Atsushi grabs the sketchbook he left on the bench and flips through it. He finds what he’s looking for and carefully tears out the page before offering it to Chuuya, “it’s not really much of a present and you don’t have to take it if you don’t like it, of course. And now that I’m offering this to you, I’m realizing it might be kind of weird, but it would feel weirder to not give you anything on your birthday. I’ll be sure to give you something better next year. I mean– That is–” Atsushi cuts himself off, face still burning bright red as he holds out the sheet of paper and keeps his eyes down.

Chuuya takes the paper. On it is a lifelike portrait of Zelda posed regally in a patch of grass. It’s done in pencil, absent of color, but Chuuya still feels like he’s looking right at her. The attention to detail is clear. Her eyes are bright with life, her fur looks silky smooth and shiny, her patterns are exact. And she actually lays in that kind of pose fairly often. Atsushi captured her perfectly.

“Thank you. This is a wonderful gift,” Chuuya says in awe. He doesn’t think he’ll get a better birthday present today.

“I’m glad you like it. She inspired me and I just had to try drawing her,” Atsushi says, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand, cheeks still pink.

“Seriously, I really like it. Thank you,” Chuuya says.

“You’re welcome,” Atsushi says, dropping his hand as his face starts to lose its blush. He clears his throat lightly and turns to fidgeting with his sketchbook. Chuuya hurries to continue the conversation.

“So, when’s your birthday? I’ll need to return the favor,” he says.

“It’s May 5th! I’ll be turning twenty four,” Atsushi replies.

“I’ll make sure to get you something you’ll like. And for that, I’ll need to know more about you. So, would you like to join us for the rest of our walk?” Chuuya says with a smile and a tilt of his head towards Zelda.

“I would,” Atsushi agrees easily through a breathy giggle. Chuuya smiles wider at the sound and they set off side by side, ready to enjoy a little more of their morning together.

Atsushi studies the dog for a moment. He doesn’t know much about dogs and couldn’t say anything about what type it is, but it’s big and black with warm brown socks going about halfway up each of its legs. It has floppy ears and a slightly curled tail. It appears healthy; its ribs aren’t poking out and it doesn’t look dirty or hurt.

The dog doesn’t seem to have a destination in mind, simply sniffing around the sidewalk, occasionally pausing to look around. It’s probably lost. Atsushi would like to help, but he doesn’t know if it’s aggressive or skittish or how exactly to approach it. He’s never been in this kind of situation before. Maybe if he had some food to lure it with.

Atsushi looks through the bag of things he just bought; bottle of water, container of ready-to-eat mixed fruit, instant noodles, and a few more packages of the snack he ate earlier. He’s pretty sure all of that would either fail at getting the dog’s attention or be unsafe for it to eat.

After a quick search online, he retrieves a piece of watermelon from the container. He breaks the chunk into smaller pieces, setting all but one back into the container. He has no idea if this will work, fruit doesn’t seem like it would be very enticing to most dogs, but it’s worth a shot.

The dog has gotten much closer while he was busy and is now coming straight for him. It keeps a slow pace, but its ears have perked up, likely at the sound of the crinkling bag.

Atsushi crouches down, holding the watermelon piece out towards it.

“C’mere.”

The dog’s tail starts wagging as soon as Atsushi speaks and it comes right up to him. It sniffs his hand before licking the watermelon out of it. It continues licking his hand after the watermelon is gone. When it finally stops, it looks up at Atsushi expectantly, tail still wagging and tongue sticking out as it pants.

“Are you thirsty?” Atsushi asks. He grabs the water bottle from his bag before realizing he doesn’t have a good way to let the dog drink. After a bit of thinking, he decides he can use the fruit container. He dumps the fruit into the tupperware he took his lunch in, setting the watermelon pieces from earlier on top, and rinses the fruit container out before filling it up halfway and setting it on the ground.

The dog starts drinking immediately. While it’s occupied, Atsushi tries to get a good look at its collar without touching it, not wanting to startle it. He can make out the name, Zelda, but it’s moving too much for him to read the phone number.

Zelda licks the bowl almost empty before stopping. She looks back up at Atsushi and he offers her an empty hand to investigate. She sniffs his fingers, tail wagging, and Atsushi slowly moves to pet her head. She lets him. Atsushi pets her head a few times before cautiously trailing his hand along her back, noting how smooth and soft her fur is. Her tail continues to wag and she steps closer to him, sniffing his face. Atsushi smiles and lets her sniff him.

Once she’s moved on from his face, he tentatively reaches for her collar. She doesn’t react at all and continues to sniff all over his torso. Atsushi pulls out his phone and dials the number on the tag. It barely gets through one ring before someone is picking up.

“Hello?” The masculine voice sounds harried from the one word alone.

“Hi. I found your dog. Zelda?” Atsushi replies.

“You did? Where are you?” Atsushi relays his location.

“I’ll be there in ten minutes, don’t move.”

The call ends before Atsushi can get another word in. He can’t find it in himself to be upset about the lack of manners. It’s a stressful situation. Atsushi can’t even imagine what it must be like, never having had a pet himself.

“Okay, you need to stick with me for a little while longer,” Atsushi says, returning his attention to Zelda. She’s moved on to nosing at his bags, searching for more food. Atsushi stands up, moving the bags out of her reach. He grabs the little pieces of watermelon out of the tupperware to keep her attention while they wait.

Zelda is already sitting down, brown eyes shining as she waits for the treat she knows he has. Atsushi can’t help but smile. He offers her a piece, keeping the others enclosed in the same hand. She gently takes it from him as Atsushi loosely grasps her collar with his other hand. He slowly feeds her the rest of the watermelon, letting her lick his hand clean when he runs out.

“You’re such a good dog,” Atsushi says, petting her head. She’s very well behaved and friendly. Atsushi probably doesn’t need to keep a hold on her collar, but he’s not taking any chances. He would never forgive himself if she ran away before her owner arrives.

Suddenly, Zelda perks up, staring past Atsushi. She stands up and her tail starts wagging the hardest Atsushi’s seen yet, making her whole body wiggle with the force of it. Atsushi turns behind him and sees a man rapidly approaching.

“Zelda!” the man calls once he’s a few feet away. Atsushi’s grateful that he didn’t have too tight of a grip on her collar as she takes off to meet her owner, easily slipping from his grip.

Dog and owner meet in a touching reunion. The man hugs Zelda tightly as she licks all over whatever parts of him she can reach. Atsushi can hear the man talking to her, but can’t make out any of the words.

Eventually, the two separate and the man checks over Zelda. He slips a harness onto her and attaches a leash before approaching Atsushi. Atsushi barely remembers to stand up before the man reaches him, too busy taking in his appearance. He has orange hair that’s falling out of a loose ponytail, framing a face that’s dotted with freckles. His eyes are a striking blue, as bright as a cloudless summer sky. It’s clear that he shed a few tears from the way his eyelashes are clumped together. He’s shorter than Atsushi and carries himself with an easy grace.

“Thank you so much. I can’t ever repay you, but take this,” the man holds out a wad of cash. Atsushi’s eyes bug out at the thickness of it.

“That’s way too much! I barely did anything,” Atsushi says. He won’t say no to a reward, and this man can clearly afford it based on the designer clothes he’s wearing, but it feels wrong to take that much for basically just petting a dog and giving it a few treats. It’s not like he had to chase it around or take care of it for hours.

“What’s your name?” the man asks.

“Nakajima Atsushi,” Atsushi says on auto-pilot, still processing the absurd amount of money being offered to him.

“Well, Nakajima-kun, you’ve done me a great service. One I’ll never be able to thank you enough for. This is the least I can do, so just take the money,” the man says seriously. Atsushi fights back a shiver. That last part sounded like a threat. Atsushi accepts the money when the man holds it out this time.

“Okay. Thank you. And it was really no trouble. It was kind of nice, actually. She’s a sweetheart,” Atsushi replies.

“Yeah, she is,” the man agrees, giving her an affectionate pat on the head. Her mouth opens in a smile as she presses into the touch. The man scratches behind her ears, his eyes soft with relief and his mouth curled in a gentle smile, and leans down to kiss her on the head. Atsushi has to hold back a rather embarrassing noise at the cuteness of it.

“How old is she?” Atsushi asks in an attempt to move his thoughts away from the pretty stranger being cute with his dog.

“Five. I’ve had her since she was a puppy,” the man answers.

“Well, you’ve raised her well. She’s very polite.”

“Thanks. She used to be a real menace. Chewing on shoes and tearing up pillows and breaking anything that was breakable. She still tries to climb into my lap like she’s a puppy whenever I sit down,” the man answers. Atsushi laughs, imagining such a big dog trying to fit on this guy’s lap. There’s no way it would work. Not comfortably, at least. For either of them.

“That just shows how much she loves you,” Atsushi says, smiling brightly. The man chuckles.

“I guess it does,” he agrees with an amused smile. Atsushi valiantly ignores the fluttering in his stomach at the sight of it. Before he can say anything to distract himself, the man continues, “I should get her home. We both need dinner.”

“Of course. I’m sorry to have kept you,” Atsushi says. He completely forget Zelda had been away from home for who knows how long, she’s bound to be hungry.

“Don’t worry about it. And thank you again.”

“You’re welcome. It was nice meeting you both. Maybe I’ll see you around?” Atsushi asks, trying not to get his hopes up.

“Maybe,” he says, throwing a smirk over his shoulder. Atsushi’s heart skips a beat. He watches until the other is out of sight before resuming his trek home, wondering the whole way if he really will see him again.

~~~~~~~~~~

An hour later, his phone lights up with a text.

Look who’s grateful to be back home and in bed with a full stomach

The space beside him in bed is cold, as expected. Bokuto normally leaves to work out early and returns shortly after Kuroo wakes. Today, Kuroo has woken up much earlier than usual so it’ll be a while yet before Bokuto gets back.

Kuroo stands up and stretches, a yawn escaping his lips. He uses the bathroom and then heads to the kitchen. He starts the coffee machine and waits at the counter as it sputters out the sweet nectar that will let him start his day, filling the room with its rich scent. Kuroo fills up his mug as soon as it’s done and sweetens it just how he likes it before taking a sip. A sigh involuntarily leaves him at the perfect taste.

Now that he’s finally starting to wake up, he can figure out what he wants to do for breakfast. The thought of how many options there are has just barely crossed his mind when he notices the disturbance in his vision.

Blurry, erratic lines in the right corner of his eyesight, unmoving no matter where he shifts his focus, even when he closes his eyes.

Kuroo sighs. What a horrible way to start the weekend. Looks like he won’t be making breakfast. He sighs again. This hasn’t happened in so long. Why now?

Kuroo sets his mug down and goes to the medicine cabinet for his migraine medicine. He grabs the packet and gets a glass of water. He sets them both on the counter and snatches a snack from the pantry that he eats quickly to have something lining his stomach.

He opens the packet and pours the contents on his tongue before washing it down with the water, grimacing at the bitter taste. He throws the empty packet in the trash and sets his glass in the sink. Now comes the waiting. The medicine always helps, but never as much as he wishes it would.

Kuroo’s lamenting of the ineffectiveness of medicine against his affliction is interrupted by the front door opening.

“I’m home!” Bokuto calls into the apartment.

“Welcome home!” Kuroo replies. Bokuto rounds the corner into the kitchen, a smile lighting up his face, and Kuroo falls into his arms with a groan. Bokuto immediately catches him, stepping back to keep from falling over and arms wrapping securely around Kuroo’s back.

“What’s wrong?” Bokuto asks.

“Migraine,” Kuroo mumbles, basking in the comfort of Bokuto’s embrace. They fell asleep in each other’s arms, but he’s been awake and cognizant for a good half hour without getting to hold Bokuto.

Usually, Kuroo’s still half asleep and trying to remember how to function when Bokuto gets back and envelops him in a bear hug that has Kuroo forgetting they didn’t wake up together, and then Kuroo will complain about Bokuto covering him in sweat since he refuses to shower at the gym. They both know he never really minds. A little sweat is a small price to pay for Bokuto hugs.

Today, he’s not even going to pretend to be upset about the sweat. He doesn’t appreciate having fully woken up without his usual hug, and he’s going to stay here as long as Bokuto will let him.

“What was that, Tetsu?” Bokuto whispers as he rubs a hand across Kuroo’s back.

“Migraine,” Kuroo repeats louder, squeezing Bokuto closer.

“Ah, I’m sorry,” Bokuto says. Kuroo hums in response. They stay there for a bit longer before Bokuto pats him on the back and drops his arms.

“Let me go take a shower real quick and then I’ll take care of you,” Bokuto suggests. Kuroo lets his own arms drop with some reluctance as he nods. He’d really rather just stay like this the whole time, wrapped in Bokuto’s arms and unquestionably safe.

“Okay, I’ll be right back!” Bokuto calls as he rushes down the hall. Kuroo watches him go and then turns to the fridge. His vision is still being affected, but he can see well enough to heat up some leftovers for Bokuto. When he grabs the handle to open the fridge, he realizes his thumb and pointer finger have gone numb. He quickly brushes it off, this isn’t uncommon for his migraines and it’s not like it will stop him from his task.

He takes their dinner from last night and throws it in the microwave. As he’s waiting for it to warm, he stares at his hand. It doesn’t look any different with the numbness, but it’s traveling across his hand, feeling returning to his thumb as the numbness moves into his middle finger. It goes through all of his fingers before it fades completely.

The microwave beeps and Kuroo takes the dish out. He places it on the table along with utensils. Not two minutes later, Bokuto returns to the kitchen, hair still damp and wearing sweats and a t-shirt.

“I thought you’d be in bed,” Bokuto says. Kuroo shakes his head.

“I normally make breakfast, but I’m not gonna be cooking anything like this. But you still need to eat, especially after a workout. And I wasn’t about to go wait in there by myself while you made food, that would be a waste of valuable cuddle time, so I reheated some leftovers instead,” Kuroo says. Bokuto snorts a laugh.

“Of course, we can’t be wasting valuable cuddle time! I’ll eat this quickly, then. Thank you for the food!” Bokuto says before digging in. He pauses after a moment.

“Aren’t you going to eat, too?”

“No. I don’t know if I’ll be nauseous later and I don’t want to have a full stomach if I end up throwing up,” Kuroo says. He doesn’t always get nausea with a migraine, but it’s pretty common, and if he does get nauseous, he almost always vomits. He doesn’t want to eat a whole meal if he’s just going to throw it up in an hour when he can just wait until the worst of it’s over and then eat.

“Right, I forgot about that. You sure you don’t want to eat anything, though? It probably wouldn’t hurt to have at least a little something,” Bokuto says, eyes wide and shiny, concern evident in his tone. Kuroo can’t say no to that.

“I already had a snack with the medicine, but I guess I could have something else, too. I am pretty hungry,” Kuroo concedes. The pain hasn’t gotten bad yet, so he still has time to eat.

He returns to the fridge to grab the milk and then a cabinet for cereal. He pours himself a small bowl and eats it quickly, finishing at the same time as Bokuto. They both put their dishes in the sink before heading to the bedroom.

Kuroo immediately crawls under the covers onto his side of the bed. Bokuto joins him and Kuroo latches himself onto Bokuto, snaking an arm between Bokuto and the mattress and wrapping the other one around Bokuto’s middle as he presses his face into Bokuto’s chest and tangles their legs together. Kuroo can feel Bokuto’s chest rumble with a laugh.

“You always get so much clingier when you feel bad. It’s cute,” Bokuto murmurs into Kuroo’s hair as he wraps his own arms around Kuroo. Kuroo feels his cheeks warm slightly at the words, still caught off guard by blatant compliments even after all these years.

“You’re cute,” Kuroo says reflexively, voice muffled by Bokuto’s chest, before laughing at himself. It may have been a reflexive response, but it’s no less true. Bokuto is incredibly cute. And pretty. And sexy. And really every other word for attractive Kuroo knows, he’s not going to sit here and list them all, he’d be doing it all day.

Bokuto chuckles again as he buries a hand in Kuroo’s hair and begins playing with it. Kuroo relaxes into the touch as Bokuto gently scratches his scalp. Bokuto’s hands work like magic, instantly releasing Kuroo’s tension and helping distract him from the pain that’s steadily building.

Kuroo stays put in Bokuto’s arms, reveling in the attention and care being provided. He’s going to enjoy this as best he can before the pain becomes the only thing he can focus on.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t take long for the pain to reach what he hopes is its peak, bringing with it an uncomfortable swirling in his stomach. Kuroo can’t help the small whine of pain that leaves him at the spike in discomfort, and presses his face harder into Bokuto’s chest.

Bokuto runs a hand up and down his back as he whispers assurances. Kuroo takes a deep breath and tries to relax his body from the stiff board it had become in the face of his pain. His head still throbs, the ache coming in waves. His stomach feels queasy and his limbs feel weak. There’s a blanket feeling of wrongness, like everything’s shifted slightly out of where it’s supposed to be.

The uneasiness in his stomach increases suddenly and Kuroo quickly extricates himself from Bokuto’s embrace to rush to the bathroom, ignoring the way it makes his head hurt even worse. Bokuto lets him go easily and follows behind him. Kuroo goes to the toilet, fully expecting to vomit, but by the time he gets there, the nausea has already receded to a faint discomfort.

Without the distraction of thinking he’s going to vomit, the pain seems to return in full force all at once, shocking through his skull and stabbing against his eyes. Kuroo lets himself sit back on the bathroom floor, still in front of the toilet. The nausea hasn’t fully faded and he’s afraid it could come back with a vengeance any moment.

Kuroo groans and rubs his hands down his face. This is the worst he’s felt in a while. He startles when a hand lands on his back, firmly but kindly rubbing circles into it.

“Is there anything you need me to do?” Bokuto asks. Kuroo had almost forgotten Bokuto was here somehow. This must really be taking it out of him. Kuroo shakes his head.

“Just stay?” he requests, looking back to Bokuto. Bokuto smiles and Kuroo can feel all the care and love shining through it.

“Of course,” Boktuo replies.

Silence falls over the room as Kuroo sits there, waiting impatiently to spill the contents of his stomach. The nausea continues to come in waves, his guts churning unpleasantly every time, and his brain continues to feel like it’s in a fight with his skull and losing, and Bokuto continues to stay beside him and comfort him.

“Maybe we should go back to bed. I can get a bucket or something to bring so we don’t have to stay on the hard floor,” Bokuto suggests after Kuroo goes to lean over the toilet without anything coming out again.

“Sure,” Kuroo agrees easily. That sounds much better. Bokuto helps pull Kuroo to his feet and gently nudges him towards the bedroom. Kuroo shuffles back to the bed and lays down, pulling the covers over himself. As soon as he’s horizontal, his eyelids droop, suddenly heavy. He doesn’t bother to fight the exhaustion weighing him down and simply lets his eyes close, sleep already trying to claim him despite the pain still pulsing through his head.

His eyes briefly open as the bed moves and Bokuto joins him. An arm settles across his side as Bokuto settles behind him, pressing his chest to Kuroo’s back. Kuroo sighs, content at being back in Bokuto’s embrace.

Kuroo falls into a light doze, consciousness vaguely coming back to him every so often, his head still throbbing every time, as his brain forces him to rest.

Eventually, Kuroo wakes completely again. He has no idea how long he’s been laying here or what time it is, but all he can focus on is the fact that his head no longer feels like it wants to murder him. The intense pulsing ache has instead been replaced with a much lighter thrum of discomfort.

“You awake?” Bokuto whispers from behind him. Kuroo hums an affirmative as he turns around in Bokuto’s embrace. He presses his lips to Bokuto’s in a sweet kiss that Bokuto eagerly returns.

“Thank you for taking care of me,” Kuroo says when he pulls away. It doesn’t actually make a difference to the physical pain Kuroo experiences during his migraines, but having someone there with him always makes it easier to handle it. The physical affection is a good distraction from the pain and when that doesn’t work, Bokuto’s presence alone still provides a comfort that soothes Kuroo’s soul.

“I’ll always take care of you. I love you,” Bokuto replies with a soft smile. Kuroo feels his heart swell with so much love for the man in front of him that Kuroo doesn’t know what to do with it.

“I love you, too,” Kuroo says, returning Bokuto’s smile with one of his own and pressing another quick kiss to his lips.

Their sweet moment is interrupted by Kuroo’s hunger. That bowl of cereal earlier was nowhere near enough and his stomach is making that very well known now as it growls loudly. Kuroo looks down towards his stomach in betrayal for ruining the moment before breaking into laughter at the same time as Bokuto.

Once they catch their breath, they carefully disentangle themselves and head to the kitchen to get some food. Kuroo can’t wait to eat some real food now that the worst of it is over. No more nausea or vision problems or tingling, just a mild headache and still a vague sense of things being off that will stick around for the rest of the day and maybe tomorrow.

“Yes?”

“Get dressed. We’re going out,” Nobara demands. He glances at the time. It’s just after 6 pm. Shouldn’t she already be busy?

“Weren’t you going out with Maki?” Nobara is always very loud about when she has dates. She likes to rub it in his face that she’s not single, even though he’s perfectly happy not having a partner at the moment.

“She got caught up at work and won’t be able to make it, but I didn’t spend all this time getting ready to not go out.”

“And you can’t go by yourself?”

“I was supposed to be on a date, I’m not going by myself instead. I already texted you the address. Meet me there in twenty.”

She hangs up before Megumi has a chance to protest. He debates not going, he was looking forward to finishing this book tonight, but ultimately decides against it. Nobara will be insufferable and demand he do some other outrageous thing as compensation if he stands her up, never mind the fact that he never agreed to it.

He puts the address she texted him into his phone and it pulls up an ice rink ten minutes away. Megumi resists the urge to sigh again. He’s never been skating before, so he doubts this will go well for him.

Megumi gets changed into something more suitable for going out, making sure to put on a jacket, and reluctantly makes his way to the rink. He reaches his destination soon enough and spots Nobara as soon as he steps inside.

“Took you long enough. Come on, let’s go!” Nobara says as she grabs his arm and drags him to the counter to pay. They receive their skates and sit down to put them on. Megumi makes sure to lace them up tight, wanting to feel as secure as possible.

Once he’s sure there’s no way his feet will be shifting in his shoes, he stands up. He wobbles a little, not used to having to balance like this, but doesn’t lose his footing.

“You’re not gonna fall over are you? I kinda thought you’d be good at this,” Nobara comments, raising an eyebrow. She’s standing surely on her skates, not a wobble in sight.

“I’m not gonna fall over,” Megumi says with a roll of his eyes. He has good balance. Even though he’s never done this before, it’s not difficult for him to stand in the skates. Moving is a different matter entirely and he feels no confidence in that. Not like he’ll say that to her face, though.

Nobara turns and starts heading to the rink. Megumi follows her, only stumbling once on the first step, his blade catching on the carpet due to his unfamiliarity with them. After that one slip up, it’s easy enough for Megumi to get to the rink itself. He’s not even wobbling anymore. This fills him with the faintest sense of confidence that immediately becomes his downfall.

As soon as he steps onto the ice, Megumi realizes that he’s made a terrible mistake. His feet slip out from under him and he falls directly onto his ass. Being on the ice is very different from being on the carpet, apparently.

Nobara bursts into laughter at his blunder, clutching her stomach. She’s already in the rink, keeping her balance easily despite shaking with mirth. Thankfully, none of the other people skating by pay him any mind, too busy chatting with their friends or lost in their own world, so his embarrassment is subdued.

“I thought you weren’t gonna fall over!” Nobara calls mockingly through her laughter. Megumi doesn’t dignify that with a response and instead focuses on getting up. He braces himself with one hand and turns to place his feet flat on the ice, but they slip again and he’s back on his ass. Nobara continues to laugh.

“Why did I agree to this again?” Megumi asks, placing his head in his hands. He knew this wouldn’t end well. At least he didn’t break anything in his fall. Nobara would really never let him hear the end of it if he did.

“Because you’re a loser who cares about your friends,” Nobara says as she skates over to him. Megumi looks up and sees her offering him a hand, mirth still bright in her eyes. Megumi takes her hand and she pulls him up. His legs continue to tremble, but Nobara holds fast, keeping him from falling over again. She drags him over to the wall and Megumi immediately transfers his weight to it, releasing a sigh of relief.

“Alright, I’ll teach you. I didn’t come here to skate by myself, and that display was pathetic,” Nobara declares.

“Thanks,” Megumi mutters sarcastically.

“You just push. It’s easy,” Nobara demonstrates as she speaks. Skating forward and then turning around and skating back to him.

“See?” Nobara looks at him expectantly. Megumi gives her his best unimpressed stare. That doesn’t even count as teaching and he certainly didn’t learn anything. She didn’t even give any instruction other than “push.” How is that supposed to be helpful?

“You’re a horrible teacher. I think I’m just gonna go home,” Megumi says. He highly doubts he’ll actually be able to learn to move properly on these things and he’d rather not spend the rest of his night falling on his ass. Twice is more than enough.

“You haven’t even tried!” Nobara protests. Megumi sighs. Technically, he did. And it ended very poorly and he has no desire to try again if it’s going to go anything like the first time.

But, he did already agree to doing this and they’ve been here for a grand total of like ten minutes. He’ll just have to continue to embarrass himself until Nobara gets fed up and lets him leave.

Megumi stops leaning on the wall and attempts to stand upright on the skates. He’s able to stand there and keep his balance, but he feels shaky and instantly knows that trying to move is a no go unless he wants to reacquaint his ass with the ice.

“I’ll just pull you along,” Nobara says as she grabs his hands. Megumi barely has time to register her words before she’s skating backwards, looking over her shoulder to make sure she doesn’t run into anyone. Megumi holds her hands tight and looks down as his feet slowly spread apart.

“Turn your feet in if you don’t want to rip your pants doing a split,” Nobara says with barely concealed amusement. Megumi shoots her a dirty look. He looks back down at his feet as he turns them towards each other. They gradually come together again as Nobara keeps them moving. He turns them straight before they run into each other.

He’s still unsure on the skates, but the feel of moving on the ice is pleasant. He glides over it with ease thanks to Nobara’s skill and he finds himself enjoying it. The ice is smooth and Nobara keeps them at a steady pace as they make laps.

Just as Megumi is thinking that maybe this wasn’t actually an awful idea, he catches the look on Nobara’s face and his heart leaps into his throat.

“I think you’re ready,” she says, smiling sweetly. He is definitely not ready!

“Wait-” Megumi tries to hold her hands tighter, but she slips away, leaving Megumi to fend for himself. It takes all his concentration just to keep himself upright. Without Nobara’s help, he’s unable to stop or keep moving forward or turn or do anything other than accept his fate at the hands of his momentum. He’s fast approaching the corner and prepares himself to slam into it and catch himself.

Unfortunately, one of his skates catches a hole in the ice and he scrambles to keep his balance. He’s so distracted with trying not to fall over that he doesn’t notice the person he’s heading towards until he’s already fallen into them.

They both go down in a pile of limbs, Megumi landing on top of the other person instead of the ice. A groan comes from under him and Megumi hurries to move, rolling over to sit on the ice.

“Are you okay?” Megumi asks. The guy he crushed sits up. His pink hair is the first thing that Megumi notices. He’s wearing a yellow hoodie and black athletic leggings that seem much too thin for such a cold activity.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Are you okay?”

Megumi nods. This guy completely broke his fall. He wasn’t all that soft, but it was definitely better than falling directly onto the ice.

“Good. Sorry about that. I wasn’t paying attention.”

“It’s fine. I’m the one who should be sorry for crushing you,” Megumi says, ‘and for being on the ice without being able to skate. Thanks to someone!’ Megumi mentally adds, cursing Nobara for her betrayal.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ve taken worse falls. I doubt I’ll even bruise from that,” the guy says with a light laugh. Megumi finds his lips quirking into a smile at the sound and a spike of dread shoots through him. He does not need to start crushing on someone he just met. That’s not a thing he does.

The guy beside him stands up in one fluid motion and stays perfectly still on the slippery ice. Megumi attempts to follow his lead and succeeds in getting both blades on the ice before falling back over. He lays down to drown in his embarrassment, crossing his arms over his face. He can practically feel the heat from his cheeks burning through the sleeves of his jacket.

“Um, do you want help getting up?” Megumi peeks through the crack between his arms and is greeted with his falling buddy staring down at him, concern hiding in his eyes and sincerity on his face. Megumi closes his eyes and sighs. This is not helping in the not developing a crush department.

Megumi drops his arms from his face and sits up. A hand appears in front of him and he looks back up at the face it belongs to. He’s still looking at Megumi with a big smile, awaiting his response. Megumi takes the hand.

He’s pulled up with ease and stumbles into the other thanks to the force. His feet almost go out from under him again, but arms wrap around him and he’s able to right himself. His face burns from the fluster of almost falling yet again and from how deceptively strong this guy is. Megumi doesn’t let himself linger on the way that makes him feel.

“Sorry,” the guy quickly apologizes, removing his arms from around Megumi and moving back a little. Megumi latches onto the guy’s hands before he can get far.

“Don’t let go! Sorry. I’ve already fallen a lot today and if I don’t have something to hold onto it’s going to happen again,” Megumi goes to release his vice grip on the other’s hands, realizing how rude he was being, but the other simply catches them before he can let go.

“It’s okay, I’ll help you if you want,” he offers earnestly and Megumi has to stop himself from letting go to cover his face. This guy is ticking too many boxes, and Megumi is not eager to embarrass himself even more in front of him.

“If you’re sure, I’d appreciate it,” Megumi says anyway because he does actually want to skate without having to be dragged along by someone else. And he wouldn’t say no to spending more time with this guy, even if he does embarrass himself. Besides, he doesn’t have anywhere else to be now that Nobara is dead to him.

“Of course! Have you ever done this or anything similar before?”

Megumi shakes his head.

“Okay, we’ll start with the basics then. Oh! I haven’t introduced myself. I’m Itadori Yuji.”

“Fushiguro Megumi.”

“Nice to meet you, Fushiguro! Now, I’ll try and help you out, but I’ve never taught anybody before so I don’t know how well it’ll go,” Itadori says.

“I’ll take what I can get,” Megumi replies. It can’t be worse than Nobara’s “teaching” that got him into this. Itadori laughs.

“Alright. I’m gonna pull you over to the side so we’re not in everybody’s way, if that’s okay?” Itadori asks. Megumi nods and Itadori tightens his hold on Megumi’s hands before moving them out of the flow of traffic.

Itadori stops right by the edge of the rink, but Megumi has no way to stop himself. Before he can worry about running into Itadori again, Itadori places his hands on Megumi’s hips to halt his momentum. Megumi tenses at the contact, the light pressure searing into his skin. Maybe he shouldn’t have agreed to this, he doesn’t know if he’ll survive it.

“Sorry, I should’ve asked,” Itadori says as he quickly removes his hands from Megumi’s body. Thankfully, Megumi doesn’t lose his balance at the loss of support. His legs barely falter despite how weak his knees feel.

“It’s fine. It’s better than running into you again,” Megumi dismisses. His attempted nonchalance is undermined by how warm his ears are, but Itadori doesn’t say anything. He simply places a hand on his hip and looks Megumi up and down. Megumi tries not to feel exposed, ignoring how the warmth spreads from his ears to his entire face at the attention.

“You seem to have pretty good balance,” Itadori notes. Megumi shrugs, subtly taking a deep breath. Now is not the time for gay panic. Now is the time for learning to ice skate. The reason that Itadori is still with him.

“I just have no idea how to move. Or stop,” Megumi says, successfully returning his attention to the task at hand. Standing on the ice is easy, it’s trying to do anything else on it that presents a problem.

“Okay, we’ll start with moving. It’s kinda hard to stop if you can’t move,” Itadori says. He squints and rests a hand on his chin, looking deep in thought. After a moment, he seems to have an idea.

“You’re gonna march,” he declares.

“March?” Megumi asks.

“Yeah, it’s an easy way to start. It’ll help you get used to shifting your weight back on forth, which is the basis of movement on ice,” Itadori explains.

“I’ll take your word for it,” Megumi replies. He has no reason not to, especially when Itadori seems so at ease on the ice. He looks down at his feet and carefully lifts one up as high as he dares, surprising himself when he doesn’t immediately fall over. He places it back down and then lifts his other foot. Unfortunately, he overbalances on the foot on the ice and starts to fall. His arms don’t even have time to start windmilling before Itadori catches him and helps him regain his balance.

“Good try! Don’t worry about messing up, I’ll catch you if you do!” Itadori says with a thumbs up. Megumi can’t stop his smile at that, but thankfully doesn’t blush again.

“Thank you,” he says. Itadori rubs the back of his neck as he glances away, cheeks coloring just slightly.

“It’s no problem. Now, let’s try again!” he says, looking back at Megumi with a beaming smile.

Megumi takes a breath and tries again. This time goes much better. He’s actually able to take a step. He starts to lose his balance again when he actually starts moving, but is able to keep his feet under him without Itadori having to catch him again.

“You’re doing good, but you should keep your eyes forward. Don’t watch your feet,” Itadori says. Megumi stops stepping and turns his gaze straight ahead before carefully resuming his task. In front of him, Itadori slowly skates backwards, an encouraging smile on his face, as Megumi keeps moving. Megumi knows he’s not properly skating, but it almost feels like it would be easy to do with how well this is going.

His transition of his weight becomes smoother with each step. His balance doesn’t falter as he begins to push forward instinctively, picking up speed. The ice under his feet suddenly feels friendly and his steps become more sure.

Megumi stops pushing himself before he starts going too fast, letting his momentum continue to carry him forward.

“You catch on quick! You’re doing really good. Especially for your first time,” Itadori exclaims from where he’s skating backwards in front of Megumi, smiling. Megumi wills himself not to blush at the praise.

“Thanks. You’re doing pretty good for your first time teaching. But I still don’t know how to stop,” Megumi says.

“Oh my god, I completely forgot! Do you wanna try now?”

Megumi nods, chuckling a little at Itadori’s franticness. It’s cute. He’s cute. Megumi falters at the thought and attempts to banish it with little success. This is worse than he thought. He doesn’t know if he’ll be able to come back from this.

“Okay, it’s really simple. All you do is scrape the ice,” Itadori says. Megumi takes back what he said about him being pretty good at teaching. His thoughts must show on his face because Itadori hurries to continue, “you keep your weight centered over one foot and then use the other to push away from yourself. You don’t even really need to push, you just turn your foot in a little and that’ll slow you down.

“It might make more sense if I show you. Do you mind if I stop you?” Itadori asks when Megumi continues to stare at him uncomprehendingly. Megumi shakes his head. Itadori slows himself down and lets Megumi get closer to him. He places his hands on Megumi’s hips and slowly brings them to a stop at the edge of the rink.

Megumi can’t say he’s gotten used to the contact, but he can appreciate it more now that he’s no longer panicking. Instead of the searing heat he felt earlier, a chill seeps through his jacket from Itadori’s cold hands. It’s not surprising. The rink is cold and Itadori isn’t wearing gloves. Despite that, Megumi still feels unreasonably warm.

“Now I’ll show you. Watch my feet,” Itadori says as he drops his hands. Megumi tries not to think about how upset he is at the loss. Itadori skates ahead of Megumi a little before stopping, clearly telegraphing his movements. He turns his right foot so his toes are pointed to the left and pushes out, scraping the ice and coming to a stop, not a breath of hesitation in his movements.

Megumi’s not sure it will go as well for him, but he sees what he needs to do. He pushes himself forward tentatively before he shifts his weight to his left foot and pushes out with his right. However, his foot simply slides over the ice, barely doing anything to slow him. He recenters himself and tries again, putting more weight behind his right foot before moving it. This time, it scrapes along the ice, stopping him so abruptly he almost topples over, but Itadori catches him again, grabbing his arms and keeping him from eating ice.

“Thanks. I think I get it now. I’m gonna try again,” Megumi says as he regains his balance.

“Of course,” Itadori releases his hold on Megumi once Megumi’s stable, “you’ve got it! And I’ll still be here to catch you if you fall.”

Megumi is comforted by the reassurance. He starts to move, skating carefully across the ice, before attempting to stop again. His foot scrapes across the ice, bringing him to a gradual stop. His legs don’t tremble and he doesn’t fall on his face. It’s a true accomplishment.

“Good job!” Itadori calls from in front of him, clapping his hands together, “you wanna do a few more laps together?”

“Sure.” Megumi follows Itadori’s lead and they begin skating again. Now that Megumi doesn’t have to spend all his focus on staying on his feet, he allows himself to truly watch Itadori.

“Your teaching skills could use some work, but you’re really good at skating. I mean, I don’t know anything about it, but it’s obvious even to me,” Megumi says. From when Itadori first stood up after Megumi crashed into him, Megumi could tell that he knows what he’s doing more than the average person that can skate, and observing him now just makes Megumi more confident in that fact. There’s a grace and confidence to Itadori’s movements that can only be achieved with time and practice. He hasn’t done anything more complex than skating forwards and backwards, but Megumi has no doubt that he can pull off some impressive moves. He glides across the ice like he was made for it. Like there’s no place he’d rather be.

“I should hope so. I have been competing since I was eight. I’ve even got a few medals,” Itadori says with a wink.

“Huh?” Megumi must have misheard. Since he was eight? Competing? Medals? He’s been doing this for that long? It would certainly explain the ease of his movements and the way he holds himself on the ice, but it simply doesn’t compute. Megumi just so happened to meet a someone who’s most likely been skating as long as he could walk (has been in competitions since he was eight, has won medals) and he taught Megumi to skate? It just doesn’t sound real. It’s not the kind of thing that happens to Megumi.

“Yuji!” A voice yells from across the rink. Itadori startles.

“Oh, crap. I’ve gotta go. If you don’t believe me, just stop by practice tomorrow. It starts at seven,” Itadori says in a rush before he skates away, leaving Megumi reeling.

Megumi doesn’t even have a moment to process anything that just happened before an arm is thrown around his shoulders.

“Did you just score a date? After ditching me?” Nobara asks incredulously.

“No. Maybe. I don’t really know. He invited me to watch him practice tomorrow. And you ditched me first,” Megumi says, still dazed from the information he received.

“I didn’t ditch you, I was letting you go so you could spread your wings on your own and fly,” Nobara replies.

“You just wanted to watch me fall on my face.”

“That too,” Nobara agrees easily and Megumi rolls his eyes, “anyway, are you gonna go on that date?” Nobara pulls him closer with the arm she has around him.

Megumi would like to think Itadori was interested just as Megumi was, but he also doesn’t want to get his hopes up if that’s not what this is. But even if Itadori doesn’t have interest in anything romantic, Megumi would still like to be his friend.

“Yeah.”

“Damn. Bet you’re really glad you came with me now,” Nobara says, lips curled into a smug smile.

----------

Chuuya curses as the ability user runs. What a coward. His plan to chase them down is thwarted when he glances behind him to find Atsushi collapsed. He knew he took a hit earlier, but he seemed fine then.

Chuuya rushes to Atsushi’s side to check him over. There are no obvious wounds. His pulse is steady, and he’s still breathing.

“Atsushi! Are you okay?” Chuuya asks. Atsushi doesn’t move or reply. His breathing shortens as his eyes move frantically behind his eyelids. His limbs twitch and his expression twists, distress evident.

“Atsushi! Wake up!” Chuuya shakes Atsushi, but he remains unresponsive as he starts to scream. Chuuya curses under his breath and pulls out his phone. He’s not willing to wait and see how bad this can get. He has no idea what this ability is. All he knows is that the agency has a case on the user. He didn’t ask for details. It’s not any of his business. He’s regretting that now.

Abruptly, Atsushi stops screaming and goes completely still. Before Chuuya can panic, Atsushi is enveloped in a bright light and a tiger takes his place.

The phone clicks as someone picks up.

“To what do I owe-”

“I found your guy. He hit Atsushi with his ability,” Chuuya cuts Dazai off. He relays his location and the way the ability user went before hanging up, not giving Dazai time to get another word in. Chuuya has more important things to deal with right now. He puts his phone back in his pocket and gives Atsushi his full attention. Atsushi is snarling as he looks all around, wild and unfocused.

“Atsushi,” Chuuya calls. Atsushi’s gaze locks onto him, eyes unseeing. Chuuya barely has time to brace himself as Atsushi pounces.

----------

Atsushi can’t breathe.

The grip on his head is unyielding, keeping his face underwater no matter how much he struggles. He thrashes and thrashes, lungs burning, but nothing happens. He can’t do anything. Black spots float in his vision. His limbs start to lose their strength.  His lungs scream for air and he can no longer keep himself from inhaling. Just before he takes in a lungful of water, his head is raised.

Atsushi gasps for air, coughing as water cascades down his face. His hair is stuck to his forehead and his eyelashes are clumped together. His lungs still ache even with the relief of oxygen. He feels lightheaded, unable to catch his breath.

“Do you understand?” Atsushi’s head is yanked up by the hair and he cries out in pain. Tears spill from his eyes uncontrollably, mixing with the water running down his face. Before he can even try and respond to the question, his head is pushed back down.

Instead of hitting water, he’s pushed all the way to the ground and lands on all fours. His face is dry, but he’s still out of breath.

Atsushi hears the sound of switch a hitting a hand and freezes. He doesn’t have time to brace himself as the first hit comes, cracking against his back with a smack that’s muffled by the shirt on his back. Atsushi stifles a cry. It only makes it worse. The next hit comes quickly and Atsushi can’t stop the tears that spring to his eyes.

Another hit, harder than the last two, makes his skin feel like it’s been split open despite how dull the switch is. Atsushi is unable to hold back a noise of pain. He watches his tears splash against the concrete below him as he endures the punishment that simply doesn’t end. Hit after hit, each one somehow worse than the last. His arms shake. His vision whites out. He can feel blood trailing down his back. He can’t think of anything but the pain. He doesn’t know how much more he can take.

----------

Chuuya moves out of the way of Atsushi’s claws, narrowly avoiding a slash. Atsushi swipes again immediately, lunging at Chuuya. Chuuya jumps and flips over Atsushi with the help of his ability. He lands behind Atsushi, who whips around with a snarl, eyes still glazed over. Atsushi doesn’t hesitate, jumping at Chuuya again with reckless abandon, claws outstretched.

Chuuya dodges and gets a hand on Atsushi’s side. He activates his ability and pins Atsushi to the ground. Atsushi growls, teeth bared. He struggles against it, slowly shifting despite the weight. Chuuya increases the strength, trying to keep Atsushi down. It doesn’t hold for long as Atsushi forces himself up with a roar, knocking Chuuya off of him.

Chuuya gets back on his feet in an instant, prepared to fight. He didn’t think he would be overpowered so quickly, but Atsushi is clearly not holding anything back. Chuuya will face him head on. He’s always wanted to fight Atsushi in his tiger form, but he wishes it wasn’t happening like this.

----------

Atsushi gasps awake and immediately starts coughing. The air is filled with dust and debris. He tries to shift, finding himself trapped under something incredibly heavy. His entire body aches and his vision is blurred with red.

“Hello?” Atsushi calls. No one answers. It’s eerily quiet. He can’t hear cars or birds or people or anything. There’s no time to dwell on it. He’s alone, which means he’ll have to get himself out of this.

Atsushi wiggles his hands flat under his shoulders and starts to push. He feels something shift above him. He pauses for a moment, wondering if doing this will only end in him being trapped worse. But there’s nothing else he can do. Atsushi pushes as hard as he can and gets his feet under him. With the extra leverage, he’s able to move the weight off of him. It falls to the side with a crash and Atsushi winces, finding that it was a giant chunk of concrete pinning him down. A giant piece of concrete from the ruined building he’s in.

He looks around and his heart stops. Atsushi stands frozen, unable to comprehend what he’s seeing. The city is completely destroyed. There are barely any buildings left standing and not another soul is in sight. There’s a haze from all the dust and the air is uncomfortably still.

Atsushi forces himself to move. He has to check for people. He can’t be the only one who made it.

The first one he finds is Kyouka. She’s lying still, eyes closed. Atsushi would think she was sleeping if not for the blood soaking her kimono. He falls to his knees next to her, bringing a hand up to check for a pulse even though he already knows what he’ll find. Her skin is cold to the touch and her heart isn’t beating.

Atsushi screams, grief and anger hitting him full force. He sobs, anguish tearing at his heart. Before he can lose himself completely, a wet cough rings out. Atsushi’s head snaps up. He scrambles to the source.

Dazai is half buried under rubble, eyes barely open. His breathing is ragged and he coughs again, blood spilling from his mouth.

“Dazai-san!” Atsushi cries. He tries to move the debris crushing Dazai’s lower half but it doesn’t budge.

“Atsushi-kun,” Dazai’s voice is weak, but Atsushi can still hear the resignation in it. Atsushi refuses to give up, continuing to lift with all his might. Still, nothing happens. Tears fill Atsushi’s eyes anew.

“Ats-” Dazai coughs and spits up more blood. Atsushi hurries to his side. He puts his hand under Dazai’s head to try and give him any sort of comfort. It’s all he can do now. He knows it’s too late. Dazai’s eyes roll over to Atsushi, going in and out of focus.

“Atsushi-kun, remember,” Dazai says, “this was your fault.”

Atsushi’s blood turns to ice. Dazai disappears from his arms and all of a sudden, Atsushi is somewhere else.

“Worthless creatures like you don’t deserve to live!”

“You bring nothing but misfortune wherever you go!”

“Just go die in a ditch somewhere!”

The voices echo through Atsushi’s head, drowning out everything else. His fault. His fault. It’s always his fault. All he does is cause people to suffer. He should have let himself die a long time ago. Then none of this would have happened. Everyone would be safe. He wouldn’t have gotten anyone killed.

“Atsushi,” the voice is quiet, raspy. Atsushi recognizes it immediately despite how pained it is. A gloved hand touches Atsushi’s cheek and he flinches.

“No, no, no. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please,” Atsushi pleads. He didn’t think it could get worse. He starts to hyperventilate as tears pour down his face. He hiccups from the force of his crying. He already killed Dazai and Kyouka and now–

----------

Chuuya lands with a crash, leaving a crater in the floor as Atsushi jumps out of the way. Chuuya launches some of the debris at Atsushi. Atsushi dodges the volley with ease, but Chuuya was only using it as a smokescreen. He follows right behind and hits Atsushi with a heavy fist. Atsushi moves in time to take it to the shoulder instead of the face. He stumbles, but quickly rights himself.

Chuuya hops back, avoiding Atsushi’s claws as they swipe for him. Atsushi shifts his weight, preparing to lunge again. Chuuya braces himself, but Atsushi stops. He shakes his head and looks around, confused.

“Atsushi?” Chuuya asks. The tiger turns to Chuuya and his tail sticks straight up. He holds himself differently now that he’s not fighting like a cornered animal. He approaches Chuuya with sure steps, posture loose and ears perked. He sits down and presses his head into Chuuya’s chest with a soft chuff. Chuuya places a hand on his head.

“You’re okay?” Chuuya asks. Atsushi raises his head. He huffs and rubs his cheek along Chuuya’s side.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Chuuya says. A bright light shines as Atsushi transforms. Chuuya drops down and catches Atsushi’s upper half before he can faceplant.

“Chuuya!” Atsushi wakes with a yell, breathing heavily as he pushes away.

“I’m right here,” Chuuya says. Atsushi looks at him. His eyes flicker across Chuuya’s face before he relaxes, falling right back into Chuuya’s arms. His body is completely limp. Chuuya shakes him lightly.   “Atsushi?” Atsushi doesn’t respond. Chuuya carefully rolls him over and rests his head on Chuuya’s thighs. Atsushi doesn’t move at all. His breathing is deep and steady in sleep. Chuuya runs a hand along Atsushi’s cheek and sighs. It’s over now.

----------

“I don’t want to go with you any more than you want me to go with you, but I’m not leaving his side.”

“And why not? It’s not like you two know each other.”

“I don’t see how it’s any of your business.”

Awareness slowly comes back to Atsushi. He’s lying on something hard and uncomfortable, but his head is cushioned on something warm. He blinks his eyes open, seeing Chuuya above him. Oh, his head is on Chuuya’s lap. No wonder it’s so comfortable. Atsushi would love to ignore everything and go back to sleep, but Chuuya is arguing with Dazai and he doesn’t want to see how that will end. Not with him in the middle.

“What happened?” Atsushi asks, cutting through their bickering as he sits up.

“Atsushi-kun!”

“Atsushi!”

They both call out at the same time.

“How do you feel?” Chuuya asks, moving closer.

“Fine. Maybe a little sore,” Atsushi says. His back hurts from laying on the concrete, but everything else feels normal.

“Do you remember anything?” Dazai asks. Atsushi thinks back. Him and Chuuya were on a date when they stumbled across the ability user that the agency had been looking for. Atsushi wanted to follow him, not wanting to let him get away. Chuuya agreed to be back up and they gave chase. They ended up at an empty warehouse, as is entirely too common, and started fighting. Atsushi took a hit and then–

The nightmares all come rushing back to Atsushi, but it doesn’t hurt like he would have expected. It feels far away already. The fear and pain and grief dulled by the waking world. None of it was real.

“Yeah, I remember,” Atsushi says. Atsushi leans back against Chuuya, taking comfort in his warmth. Even though he knows everything is okay and no one is actually hurt, himself included, the physical contact is reassuring. He’s not alone. Chuuya wraps his arms around Atsushi’s middle and Atsushi sighs.

“Did you catch the guy?” Atsushi asks. He hopes so. No one else should have to go through what Atsushi did.

“He’s in custody. More importantly, what the fuck is going on here?” Dazai gestures at Atsushi, offended.

“Going on where?” Atsushi asks innocently, tilting his head. Chuuya hides a snicker in the back of Atsushi’s shoulder and Atsushi fights to keep a smile off his face.

“Don’t play dumb with me! Since when are you two all buddy-buddy?” Dazai replies heatedly. Atsushi laughs and doesn’t respond. Honestly, he’s kind of surprised that Dazai had no idea. Dazai always seems to know things that he shouldn’t.

“Chuuya, how long have you known Atsushi-kun?” Dazai turns his attention to Chuuya.

“I’m not telling you shit,” Chuuya says. Atsushi shifts and Chuuya gets the message, letting his arms unwind from around Atsushi. Atsushi stands up and offers a hand to Chuuya. He takes it and Atsushi pulls him up.

“We’re still on for next week?” Chuuya asks Atsushi, hiding his smirk from Dazai as his eyes shine with mirth. Atsushi smiles. He thinks he could mess with Dazai even more. Atsushi kisses Chuuya on the cheek.

“Of course,” he says. Chuuya’s smirk turns into a genuine smile and he pulls Atsushi in for a kiss on the lips. It’s hardly more than a peck, but it still makes Atsushi’s heart skip a beat. Out of the corner of his eye, Atsushi sees Dazai’s jaw drop.

“I’m seeing things, right?” he begs. Chuuya snickers before kissing Atsushi again. Atsushi meets him in the middle, content to leave Dazai to his crisis.

Besides, he’s the one who’s dating Atsushi. None of the others can say that.

“Your fur is so soft!” someone calls from the gaggle surrounding Atsushi. Dazai’s eye twitches.

Dazai is not a strong man. This is the third time this week that they’ve done this and he can’t keep lying to himself. He is maybe a worrying amount of jealous. Never before has he hated his ability as he does now. He wants to feel how soft Atsushi’s fur is with his own hands. He wants to be able to kiss his nose and poke his toe beans.

Dazai sighs dramatically to show his displeasure. Atsushi’s ears perk up and he looks Dazai’s way, tail flicking. Dazai smiles. At least he still gets the most attention.

Ranpo flops onto Atsushi’s back and sticks his tongue out at Dazai. Dazai turns away, silently seething, and entirely unaware of the plan forming in Atsushi’s mind.

----------

Atsushi is nervous.

He’s going to ask Dazai something that he’s never asked him before. He’s going to ask if he can come over. It’s not really that big of a deal, all things considered. But no matter how many times Atsushi tells himself that, he still feels nervous. He thinks it would be less nerve-wracking to invite Dazai to his place, but he lives with Kyouka. He doesn’t want to ask her to leave and this is definitely not something that there should be an audience for. So, asking to go to Dazai’s place it is.

Atsushi stares at the contact on his phone. He can do this. Atsushi takes a deep breath and hits the call button. It almost rings out before Dazai answers.

“Hello?” Dazai says, voice tinny through the speakers.

“Hi, Dazai-san. I wanted to ask if I can come over. I have something I wanted us to try,” Atsushi says quickly, heart pounding in his chest.

“Of course. The door’s unlocked,” Dazai replies casually. Atsushi breathes a silent sigh of relief.

“Thank you. See you in a bit,” Atsushi says, hanging up before Dazai can get another word in. Unfortunately, that was the easy part. Now he has to actually go over there. Atsushi slips his phone into his pocket and grabs what he needs to do this. He heads out and makes the quick walk to Dazai’s door. He stands there for a moment, psyching himself up, before he knocks.

The door opens to Dazai’s smiling face. Atsushi smiles back nervously. Dazai steps to the side and sweeps his arm to invite Atsushi in. Atsushi enters and slips his shoes off as Dazai closes the door. There’s no turning back now. Atsushi hopes this goes well.

“So, what did you want to do?” Dazai asks. Atsushi swallows. Here goes nothing. He holds out the pair of gloves he bought yesterday. They’re solid white, simple and thin cotton gloves.

“I know it’s not the same, and I’m not even sure if it’ll work, but I noticed that you seemed like you wanted to pet me while I’m a tiger. So, I got you gloves. They’re the thinnest ones I could find. Obviously, you still can’t actually feel my fur, but I thought it might be similar enough. And I felt bad that everyone else can and you can’t. I think you should get to as well, if you want. Everyone else seems to really enjoy it and-”

“Thank you, Atsushi-kun. That’s very kind of you,” Dazai cuts Atsushi off. Atsushi freezes, unable to read Dazai’s tone. Is he upset? Has Atsushi made a mistake?

“It’s okay if you don’t like it,” Atsushi starts.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m excited to try this. It’s just that I thought you were coming over because you wanted to have sex,” Dazai says. Atsushi’s jaw drops as his face floods with heat. Nothing could have prepared him for that response. He quickly realize just how easy it would be to make an assumption like that from his actions and embarrassment hits him full force. Atsushi covers his face with his hands. This is absolutely mortifying.

“I’m sorry,” Atsushi says through his hands.

“You don’t need to apologize. I think I might like your idea more, anyway,” Dazai replies, “having Atsushi-kun all to myself is a pleasure regardless of what we’re doing.”

Atsushi’s blush gets even darker and he slowly uncovers his face.

“We could, you know, if you want,” Atsushi says haltingly. Dazai laughs.

“It’s okay, Atsushi-kun. Don’t force yourself. I’m perfectly happy with this. We don’t have to do that ever, if you don’t want to,” he says lightly.

“I do! At some point,” Atsushi replies. He just wasn’t prepared for that right now, and he does really want to see if his idea will work and if Dazai will like it. Sex was the last thing on his mind.

“As long as it’s what you want. Now, follow me. Let’s give this a try,” Dazai says, turning and walking further inside. Dazai enters his bedroom, Atsushi right behind him. Atsushi doesn’t have the presence of mind to take in Dazai’s living space, too busy trying to not curl up into a ball and let his shame consume him. Atsushi shakes his head. It wasn’t even that bad of a misunderstanding and Dazai isn’t upset at all. Atsushi doesn’t need to be either.

Dazai slips the gloves on, testing how they feel. When he seems satisfied, he looks at Atsushi expectantly. Atsushi gets the message. He takes a deep breath as the transformation washes over him. He wonders just how different it will feel when Dazai’s the one touching him. It’s not something he thought he’d ever experience.

----------

Dazai is pleased.

Although it’s not what he was expecting, this outcome is equally satisfactory. Seeing how much Atsushi cares for him, how he went out of his way to offer Dazai this, an experience that no one else gets. It’s more than enough to completely dispel Dazai’s jealousy.

Atsushi’s tiger form is a thing of beauty. A majestic beast comprised of unbelievable strength hidden beneath sleek, striped fur. Fangs as long as Dazai’s fingers and paws as big as his head. Dazai can’t help but marvel at it every time he sees it. How easily this form could kill him if not for his ability.

Dazai approaches with soft footsteps. He carefully rests a gloved hand on Atsushi’s back. Nothing happens, like Dazai expected. The gloves are thin, but not that thin. They’re still enough of a barrier to keep Dazai’s skin from touching Atsushi.

Atsushi’s tail swishes and Dazai smiles. He can imagine how relieved Atsushi is that his idea worked. Dazai sets a hand on Atsushi’s back, awestruck by the sheer power Atsushi radiates like this. No one would think it, seeing him as a human.

Dazai’s hand moves from between Atsushi’s shoulder blades and traces a path down Atsushi’s spine. When Dazai reaches Atsushi’s tail, he gently grabs it. Atsushi flicks it out of Dazai’s hand. Dazai grabs it again and Atsushi removes it from his grasp again, letting out a soft growl this time as he turns to look at Dazai. Dazai raises his hands and smiles innocently. Atsushi snorts in a way that Dazai can only assume is equivalent to an eye roll.

Dazai circles behind Atsushi and walks up his other side. He stops at Atsushi’s shoulder and crouches down.

“Lift your paw,” Dazai requests, poking his shoulder. Atsushi side eyes him but obliges, shifting his weight to raise the leg that Dazai is next to. Dazai holds Atsushi’s paw with one hand and pokes his middle paw pad with the other. It’s just as squishy as he hoped it would be. He pokes each of the other pads, delighted beyond words at the soft feeling. Atsushi huffs in amusement.

Dazai lets go of Atsushi’s paw and Atsushi puts it back down, redistributing his weight evenly. Dazai stands back up and moves to face Atsushi head on.

He places a hand on Atsushi’s head. Atsushi presses into the touch, staring up at Dazai with half-closed eyes. Dazai scratches behind one of Atsushi’s ears and Atsushi pushes up even harder. Dazai trails his hand down and scratches Atsushi’s chin. Atsushi sighs, eyes closing all the way as he raises his head higher to give Dazai better access.

Dazai laughs silently. Atsushi really is just a big cat. Dazai brings his other hand up to lavish Atsushi in more attention. Dazai might not be able to feel Atsushi’s fur with his bare hands, but seeing his reactions is more than enough to make up for it.

Dazai moves his hands to cradle Atsushi’s face and kneels to be level with him. Atsushi opens his eyes and Dazai is mesmerized. He already thought Atsushi’s eyes were beautiful, and like this, they’re even more captivating. Bigger and rounder, practically glowing with power. The purple and gold even more striking against the black and white of his fur. It’s a sight Dazai could never get tired of, but he’d like to have human Atsushi back now.

Dazai leans forward and presses a kiss between Atsushi’s eyes. Dazai barely has time to register the transition from tiger to human before Atsushi is on him, clinging to him as he rubs his head all over Dazai’s chest. Dazai laughs and Atsushi raises his head.

“Did you like it?” Atsushi asks, cheeks flushed and hair mussed. Dazai pulls him in for a proper kiss, unable to resist. Atsushi reciprocates, lips moving against Dazai’s with practiced ease. Dazai smiles into it, breaking away after just a moment.

“I loved it,” Dazai says.

“I’m glad,” Atsushi replies with a smile so bright Dazai is tempted to shield his eyes. Instead, he slips his gloves off and ruffles Atsushi’s hair. After getting to pet tiger Atsushi, he can say that this is just as good.

He knows Dazai can take care of himself, in life or death situations, at least. Unfortunately, that knowledge isn’t enough to rid him of his concern. Atsushi has no way of knowing if anything bad happened, but he can at least see if Dazai’s home when he gets off. In about 5 hours. He definitely can’t wait that long.

Atsushi thinks he might just leave. He shouldn’t. It’s unprofessional and rude to leave work early when there isn’t even an emergency. But, he’s been so distracted by his worry that he’s barely gotten any work done today, anyway. Him being gone will hardly be different than him being here right now.

Mind made up, Atsushi quietly packs his things and leaves.

The walk back to the dorms is quick and Atsushi takes the, by now, familiar path to Dazai’s door. Atsushi knocks. There’s not a sound from behind the door. Atsushi waits for a moment before knocking again, louder.

“Please answer the door if you’re home, Dazai-san!” he calls. He still doesn’t hear anything from inside. All signs point to Dazai not being in, but Atsushi wants to know without a doubt before he begins panicking.

In a last ditch effort, Atsushi tests the door knob. It turns with no resistance. Atsushi pushes and the door opens easily. Atsushi is thankful, but also concerned. Does Dazai leave his door unlocked all the time?

“Pardon the intrusion,” Atsushi says into the quiet apartment as he hesitantly steps inside. Atsushi has never been to Dazai’s place. He’s not sure what he was expecting, but what he finds is nothing much. There’s a small living area to the left of the entryway with a low table and TV, and an open doorway leading to a kitchen to the right. And no Dazai.

“Dazai-san?” he calls loudly, “are you here?” he receives no response yet again. Atsushi slips his shoes off and heads down the short hallway to what he assumes is the door to Dazai’s bedroom. It feels rude to go so far into the apartment without Dazai there to invite him in, but he’s come this far and he’s determined to get confirmation. It’s certainly seeming like Dazai’s not here, though.

Atsushi knocks on the door. As expected, there’s no answer.

“I’m going to come in,” Atsushi warns anyway, before sliding the door open. To his surprise, Dazai’s actually there. He’s laying in bed, sound asleep.

Except Atsushi can hear the way his breath rasps through his lungs and see the way he’s trembling from where he’s standing in the doorway. Atsushi rushes over and gently touches the back of his hand to Dazai’s forehead. His skin is burning up. Atsushi gently shakes Dazai.

“Dazai-san, wake up!” he urges. Dazai groans softly as he blinks his eyes open. They’re glazed with fever.

“Atsushi-kun?” his voice is hoarse and he coughs immediately after, turning his head away from Atsushi. Atsushi releases a sigh, relieved that Dazai actually woke up.

“Yes, it’s me.”

“What are you doing here?” Dazai rasps quietly, brow furrowing in confusion.

“I was worried. And it seems I was right to be. You’re horribly sick,” Atsushi replies. He’s glad he decided to leave when he did.

“Atsushi-kun was worried about me?” Dazai asks as he smiles weakly, voice lacking the teasing edge that would normally accompany such a question due to his fatigue.

“I always worry about you. But that’s not important right now. Where do you keep your medical supplies? And have you taken any medicine or eaten or drank any water today?” Atsushi asks. He doubts that Dazai has had any of that. He looks like he hasn’t even gotten out of bed at all today.

“Bathroom. And no,” Dazai replies.

“Okay, I’ll be right back,” Atsushi goes to the bathroom to look for what he needs. Thankfully, Dazai has a thermometer and cold medicine. Atsushi grabs them both and returns to Dazai, who hasn’t moved.

“I’m going to take your temperature,” Atsushi tells him. Dazai hums in acknowledgement and Atsushi places the thermometer on his temple and presses the button. After a short time, it beeps to signify that it’s done. 38 it reads. Not as bad as Atsushi thought it would be, but Dazai should still take medicine for it.

“Okay. I’m gonna make you some tea to take the medicine with,” Atsushi goes to the kitchen and prepares some tea with ginger and honey, to help soothe his throat. When he returns with the freshly made tea, Dazai has sat up, the blanket wrapped tightly around his shoulders.

Atsushi kneels next to him and offers him the cup of tea along with the medicine. One of Dazai’s hands slithers out of the blanket and takes the pills. He sets them in his mouth before reaching back out for the cup. Atsushi’s hands hover near the cup as Dazai brings it to his lips and drinks. Dazai drains the whole cup before handing it back to Atsushi. Atsushi sets it on the floor to the side.

“Thank you,” Dazai’s voice doesn’t sound as rough, but he’s just as quiet.

“You’re welcome. I’m going to get you something to eat,” Atsushi replies. He gets up and heads to the kitchen before Dazai can say anything. He scours the kitchen for something suitable. There aren’t a lot of options, but Atsushi is able to whip up a simple soup in just a few minutes. He returns to Dazai’s side with a half full bowl. He doesn’t want to give him too much to start with.

“Here,” Atsushi says, holding out the bowl.

“I don’t need food. All I need is Atsushi-kun’s love and affection,” Dazai says, denying Atsushi’s offering. Atsushi sighs a laugh. Even sick, Dazai is still a menace. At least he seems to be feeling a little better. Maybe the tea helped more than Atsushi thought it would. Or maybe he’s just putting on a front since Atsushi’s here. It’s hard to tell with Dazai.

“I appreciate the sentiment, but you really do need to eat if you feel like you can,” Atsushi says. Dazai needs to keep his strength up so he can get better. Not having food will only make things worse.

“Maybe if Atsushi-kun feeds me,” Dazai replies mischievously. It’s somewhat diminished by the exhaustion that lines his body. Rather than being embarrassed or exasperated, Atsushi just wants to make sure he’s properly taken care of.

“Alright,” Atsushi agrees. Dazai needs to eat and Atsushi doesn’t mind doing it even if Dazai was just trying to get a reaction out of him or get out of having to eat. Dazai should know that it takes more than that to deter Atsushi.

Atsushi holds up a spoonful for Dazai. Dazai reluctantly leans forward and eats it. Atsushi can see the way Dazai immediately perks up and smiles to himself. Dazai finishes the whole serving quickly, taking every bite from Atsushi’s hand.

“Atsushi-kun must be magic,” Dazai says. Atsushi rolls his eyes lightly.

“You’re just hungry. You haven’t eaten anything today,” Atsushi points out. Dazai shakes his head.

“I think it’s because it came from Atsushi-kun’s hands,” Dazai says. Atsushi sighs, deciding not to respond to that.

“You should rest more now that you’ve had fluids and food. I’ll check your temperature again in a bit to make sure it doesn’t get too high, but I won’t need to wake you up for that,” Atsushi says. Rest is important when sick. And he’s sure Dazai still feels bad despite the way he’s acting.

“If Atsushi-kun says so. I am pretty tired,” Dazai yawns theatrically, stretching his arms above his head. He lays back down and Atsushi tucks him in, kind of surprised that Dazai accepted it so easily.

“Sleep well, Dazai-san,” Atsushi says.

“How am I supposed to sleep well without a kiss good night?” Dazai replies, watching Atsushi expectantly.

“You do it every night. And I’m not kissing you while you’re sick,” Atsushi says. He doesn’t know if he can actually catch what Dazai has, what with his enhanced healing and the fact that he’s never really gotten sick before, but it’s still gross. Dazai sticks his lower lip out in a pout. Atsushi runs a hand through Dazai’s hair and gives him an apologetic smile.

“I’ll give you as many kisses as you want when you’re better,” Atsushi promises in his moment of pity. The pleased smirk on Dazai’s face assures Atsushi that Dazai’s definitely going to abuse that promise. Atsushi can’t be too upset. There are worse things than being begged for kisses 24/7 by the person he’s in love with.

“I’ll hold you to that,” Dazai says through a yawn.

“I’m sure you will,” Atsushi sighs fondly. His hand is still in Dazai’s sweat damp hair and he uses it to gently scratch Dazai’s scalp. Dazai closes his eyes and, in moments, his breathing evens out as he falls asleep.

The ghost is young, probably around Atsushi’s age. He’s covered in bandages and is wearing a black suit. The ghost rustles the tablecloth, catching the attention of a few people in the group. He then takes turns passing a hand through each of the people who reacted, making them shiver. He picks the one who looks the most bothered and whispers in their ear. Atsushi wonders what he said to them. Though, it’s not like they would be able to hear anything other than indistinct whispers. Maybe a few intelligible words. It’s incredibly rare for a ghost to have the ability to hold a full conversation with a living person. The ghost would have to be exceptionally powerful, or the person would have to have some sort of paranormal affinity or abilities.

Whatever the person heard, whether it was intelligible or not, causes them to flinch and look around, clearly scared. The ghost’s smile widens and Atsushi can tell that he’s found his primary target.

Atsushi debates interfering, but decides against it. He’s ultimately harmless. The ghost shouldn’t be able to truly hurt them, and he’s having fun. Atsushi sees no reason to stop him at this point. He also doesn’t want to interrupt this group’s outing by going over to directly deal with the ghost. They look like they’re having a lot of fun, even the one being harassed by the ghost. Plus, Atsushi doesn’t like to interact with ghosts while there’s other people around if he can help it. He’s used to people looking at him like he’s crazy, but he still doesn’t enjoy it.

If the situation escalates, Atsushi will do what he needs to, but as it is, he’ll wait and see. He takes a seat far enough away to not seem like he’s spying on the group and keeps a close eye on them the whole time they’re there. The ghost doesn’t do anything more than blowing napkins off the table and causing shivers and uneasy glances.

As the group packs up and starts to leave, the ghost sticks his leg out and trips the person he’d been harassing the most. The ghost laughs as the person falls, shoulders shaking and mouth wide open.

Atsushi’s eyebrows raise. The person’s foot actually hit the ghost’s leg and was met with resistance instead of going straight through like Atsushi expected. This ghost is more powerful than Atsushi thought. It’s not common for ghosts to be able to physically interact with the living world to that degree. Not while still having so much control. Normally, stronger ghosts are much more volatile and unpredictable. They tend to lack as much reasoning as this ghost clearly has. Atsushi doesn’t know what to make of him.

The group finally leaves and Atsushi sighs, relieved that no one was hurt. Now he can do some investigating.

Atsushi has been dealing with ghosts since he was born, from pranksters to poltergeists. A lot of ghosts are just sad and confused. Or angry. Atsushi tries to help them however he can, but it doesn’t always work out. It’s no easy feat to help a ghost move on. There are plenty of times when they don’t have any idea what they need and Atsushi can’t always figure it out for them. It’s simple to exorcise them, but that’s reserved for the ones who can’t be reasoned with and are causing harm. It destroys them completely instead of allowing them to move on peacefully. Atsushi hates when he has to do it.

Something hits Atsushi in the arm, bringing him out of his thoughts. He looks down, seeing the pebble that was no doubt thrown by the ghost. He glances around, instinctively letting his gaze skate right over the culprit. He’s had plenty of experience pretending he can’t see them when other people are around. This time, he does it because he doesn’t want the ghost to know that Atsushi can see him yet. Atsushi is going to test him. He needs to know if the ghost is actually unstable at all.

Another pebble hits him and Atsushi makes no reaction, instead pretending to be engrossed in his phone. The ghost throws a few more and Atsushi continues to ignore him.

Atsushi feels a chill as the ghost approaches. He suppresses a shiver and keeps his attention on his phone. He hears the ghost huff behind him. Atsushi watches out of the corner of his eye as the ghost walks around to be in front of him. Atsushi can’t see his face to make out his expression, but he still hasn’t displayed a lack of control so far, which is a good sign.

“Boo!” the ghost yells in Atsushi’s ear. Atsushi fights to keep a straight face. What a cliché.

“How are you not freaked out yet?” the ghost mutters.

“Maybe you’re just doing a bad job,” Atsushi says, turning to face the ghost. They lock eyes and the ghost jolts away.

“You can see me? How?” the ghost asks, quickly regaining his composure. Atsushi shrugs.

“I don’t know. That’s just how it’s always been for me,” Atsushi says. He’s never figured out why he has this ability or how it even exists despite his attempts to. The ghost looks Atsushi up and down, studying him.

“So, are you here to exorcise me or something?” the ghost asks, suspicion in his voice. Atsushi shakes his head.

“No. I’ll try and help you move on if you want me to, but I have no plans to exorcise you unless you start hurting people,” he replies.

“How do you know I’m not already hurting people?”

“I don’t. But you had plenty of opportunities earlier and never did. You looked like you were having a lot of fun simply bothering them. I’m guessing you do it often?”

“What else am I supposed to do? I’m a ghost,” the ghost says with a shrug.

“Fair enough,” Atsushi replies. He was hoping to actually learn something about the ghost from that, but it seems like the ghost might not want to talk about himself.

“What about you? Is it your mission to help ghosts move on or something?” the ghost asks.

“Something like that,” Atsushi replies. He doesn’t have a mission. He just helps who he can however he can.

“Ah, forced responsibility. You know, just because you have that ability, it doesn’t mean that you have to do anything with it,” the ghost says conspirationally.

“Maybe. But I want to,” Atsushi replies. It’s a blessing and a curse. He didn’t ask for this ability. It’s given him more trouble than anything else. Sometimes he wishes that he wasn’t born with it. But he can never bring himself to hate it. It’s given him friends he never would have met otherwise and allowed him to help people that no one else can.

As a child, he wasn’t aware of his ability and openly talked about the people that only he could see. He experienced more than his fair share of bullying and abuse for that and quickly learned to keep his mouth shut.

His only saving grace was that the ghosts back then never hurt him. They were just as lonely as Atsushi and were the only people who would ever spend time with him. They didn’t think he was a freak.

“How righteous of you,” the ghost remarks.

“It’s not righteous. I just do what I can,” Atsushi says.

“And you don’t plan on trying to make me move on?” the ghost asks. Atsushi shakes his head.

“No. Why would I? Moving on is for the ghost’s sake, not mine. If you want help, then I’ll help. But there’s no point if you’re not willing,” Atsushi replies. He can’t force a ghost to move on, and he wouldn’t want to.

“In that case, it’s nice to meet you. I look forward to scaring you,” the ghost says. Atsushi laughs.

“Good luck,” he says. Atsushi hasn’t scared easily in a long time and he doubts this ghost will be able to do it. But maybe Atsushi will be surprised.

Atsushi sets his bag down and takes a seat at the table. He pulls out his materials and headphones and gets to work. This assignment is due tomorrow and he’s barely started on it. He hums as he works, ready and motivated to get this done today.

Atsushi makes quick work of it, finishing in record time. He sighs in relief as he turns it in. He gives himself a moment to enjoy the feeling and then moves on to the next. Now, it’s time to do practice problems for an upcoming math test. Right as he starts to refocus, something suddenly slams into the back of his head. Atsushi yelps, head jolting forward with the force. He brings a hand up to rub the back of his head, trying to soothe the pain.

“I’m so sorry! Are you okay?” Atsushi drops his hand and takes his headphones off as he turns towards the voice. A man with blond hair and glasses is standing next to him, looking apologetic.

“Look at what you’ve done Kunikida-kun! You’ve hurt a perfectly innocent bystander,” a different voice calls. Atsushi turns and sees another man. This one is brunet and has bandages wrapped around his neck.

“So you admit your guilt?” the blond (Kunikida?) says.

“I’m guilty of nothing except having fun.”

The blond sighs and shakes his head, “Is your head okay?” he addresses Atsushi. Atsushi nods.

“I’m fine. That was nothing. It barely hurt,” Atsushi replies. He’s betrayed by a wince as he touches the place where he got hit. It’s surprisingly tender, but he doubts it will leave him with anything worse than a bruise.

“I’ll get you some ice to help with the pain,” the blond says. He rushes off before Atsushi can protest. He definitely doesn’t need ice.

“You’re sure you don’t have a concussion or anything? He has a wicked throw,” the brunet says. Atsushi shakes his head.

“I don’t. It hurts a bit, but that was nowhere near hard enough to give me a concussion,” Atsushi says. He’s familiar with concussions. That definitely didn’t give him one. The pain has already lessened greatly.

“What even happened?” Atsushi asks. All Atsushi knows is that something hit him in the back of the head and it was presumably thrown by the man who went to get him ice.

“Kunikida-kun, the barbarian, threw a book at me, the valiant rogue. I dodged with unparalleled grace, to no one’s surprise. And then, tragedy struck. A beauty unlike any that the world has ever seen was injured in my place,” the brunet explains like he’s telling a gripping tale, complete with exaggerated expressions and dramatic movements. Atsushi wonders if he does improv or some sort of acting. Atsushi would believe it. That felt like a performance.

“So it was a book that hit me in the head?” Atsushi asks, deciding against questioning anything else.

“Yes. This book,” the brunet bends down and picks up a paperback journal, “it’s full of Kunikida-kun’s secrets. Wanna see them?”

“Not really,” Atsushi says. He’d prefer to respect Kunikida’s privacy. He doesn’t even know anything about Kunikida, and starting off with reading a book full of his secrets, assuming the brunet is to be believed, would be horribly rude. Atsushi would rather talk to him if he wanted to know more about him.

“Suit yourself,” the brunet shrugs and opens the journal. He squints at it and then huffs a laugh, “he got me good.” He turns the book around to show Atsushi. All that’s written is ‘Quit going through my stuff, Dazai!’ The aforementioned closes it and tosses it on the table behind him.

“You must really annoy him,” Atsushi says. He can only imagine that there have been many similar such situations before now for Kunikida to have a decoy like this.

“It’s one of my favorite pastimes,” Dazai agrees easily. Given the evidence Atsushi has just seen, he can’t say that he’s surprised by that response.

“Even when you get other people smacked in the back of the head with a book?” Atsushi asks.

“I do feel bad about that. A beauty such as yourself getting hurt is truly unfortunate. Thankfully, it wasn’t a fatal wound,” Dazai says, placing a hand on his cheek.

“Of course it wasn’t fatal. And my name is Nakajima Atsushi, so you don’t have to keep calling me ‘a beauty’,” Atsushi says, feeling embarrassed. He had thought that Dazai was just teasing earlier, that it was just a bit, but now he’s wondering if it was genuine.

“Well, Atsushi-kun, I’m sorry that you got caught in the crossfire. How ever can I make it up to you?” Dazai asks.

“You don’t need to make it up to me. I’m really not that hurt,” Atsushi replies. He wouldn’t expect anything from this other than the apology that he already got. It was an accident and he was barely hurt.

“How about I buy you a drink?” Dazai suggests with a wink. Atsushi feels his cheeks warm. He’s more certain that Dazai’s words were genuine, now. He’s a little skeptical of agreeing, purely because if he does, he’s not sure there would be any turning back. He thinks he’d be fine with that, though. Why not take a chance? It’s not like he’s hated what he’s seen of Dazai so far.

“Alright,” Atsushi says. Dazai opens his mouth to say something, but is interrupted by Kunikida’s reappearance. He arrives with an ice pack that he hands to Atsushi, who takes it with a smile.

“Thank you very much. You didn’t have to go to all the trouble,” Atsushi says. He holds the ice pack to the back of his head. At this point, his head barely hurts, but it’s not like he’s going to refuse the gesture. And it does feel nice.

“It’s the least I could do after causing you harm. I’m very sorry for that.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it. It was an accident,” Atsushi says. He doesn’t know why they’ve both made it seem like a big deal. Albeit, in very different ways, with Kunikida helping him and Dazai flirting with him. Atsushi feels awkward about both.

“I’ll make sure to not let something like this happen again,” Kunikida says. Atsushi nods. That’s good, but Atsushi wonders how well he’ll be able to stick to that with Dazai as part of the equation. It’s obvious that he’s a master at pushing Kunikida’s buttons.

“Are you sure you have the restraint for that, Kunikida-kun?” Dazai asks with a smug grin. Kunikida takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of his nose. He mutters something to himself before straightening up.

“I’m not dealing with this right now. Sorry again,” Kunikida directs the last bit to Atsushi. He gathers his things and leaves as quickly as he appeared. Atsushi can’t blame him. He does feel bad for him, but it’s also kind of amusing just how annoyed he gets.

“How about that drink?” Dazai asks. Atsushi laughs, startled by the abruptness. He wonders if Dazai purposefully ran Kunikida off.

“Sure. If you tell me your name,” Atsushi says as he starts packing up his stuff. He knows ‘Dazai’ from Kunikida’s note, but Dazai never actually introduced himself. And Atsushi would like to know the name of the person taking him out.

“Dazai Osamu,” Dazai says.

“Well, Dazai-san,” Atsushi says as he slings his bag over his shoulder, “let’s go.”

He can’t say he’s surprised, though. A part of him wondered if it would turn out this way from the moment he met Dazai. There’s just something about him that pulls Atsushi in. For a while, he was able to convince himself it was because Dazai saved him, but deep down he knew it wasn’t so simple.

Atsushi isn’t familiar with romantic love (or any love, for that matter), but he’s read stories, he’s seen it between other people. A fuzzy feeling, butterflies in your stomach, warmth and comfort; there are many ways people describe it. It’s a feeling that gives you strength, makes you happy. Atsushi didn’t think it was something he’d ever experience, but there’s no denying it now.

Not with the way his heart races at the smallest contact; the way Dazai’s smile fills him with warmth; the way his eyes always lock onto Dazai first; the way he always wants to spend time with Dazai; the way he feels safe with Dazai.

How could it be anything other than love?

With this revelation, however, Atsushi decides to do nothing. Some things are better left unsaid. He doubts his feelings will be reciprocated and he doesn’t need to know how terribly that rejection could go.

He enjoys the relationship they have now, he doesn’t need it to be different. Of course he’d love to be able to go on dates with Dazai and kiss him and have his love returned, but he’s still perfectly happy without that. He’s perfectly happy to be close to Dazai at all. So, he’ll keep quiet and live with it. That way, nothing has to change, whether it’s for better or worse. He’s not willing to take the risk when the worst option is infinitely more painful than the best option is wonderful.

It’s not like it’ll kill him to not tell Dazai how he feels. He’s been through man made horrors beyond comprehension and suffered more emotional damage than any person should ever go through, but he’s still up and kicking. Some unrequited, unspoken feelings aren’t going to be what takes him out.

----------

Atsushi wakes early, like always, and quietly slides open the closet door. He’s greeted with an empty room and the smell of cooking food. He gets out of bed and stretches before heading to the kitchen.

“Isn’t it my turn to make breakfast?” Atsushi asks upon spotting Kyouka at the stove.

“But you’re sick,” Kyouka says, not turning away from her task. Atsushi sighs.

“I’m not sick. It’s just a cough. Probably allergies or something,” he says. He’s been coughing for the past couple of days, but he hasn’t had a fever or any other symptoms. There’s just a tickle in his throat sometimes. He’s barely noticed it.

“Still, you should talk to Yosano-san if it doesn’t clear up soon,” Kyouka replies. She turns off the heat and pulls the pan off the stove, portioning the meal onto two plates.

“I will,” Atsushi says. He’s had similar things happen before and they always go away on their own. He’s hoping and assuming that the same will happen this time, but he’ll make sure to see Yosano by the end of the week if nothing has changed.

“Good,” Kyouka smiles as she sets the plates on the table. They both take their seats and eat their breakfast, exchanging idle conversation. Soon enough, they’ve finished the meal.

“Thank you, Kyouka-chan. It was delicious,” Atsushi says. He stands and grabs the used dishes to take to the sink.

“It’s not very difficult,” Kyouka replies, looking away.

“But you still did a great job. You’ve gotten a lot better from when you first started,” Atsushi says. The first time she tried to cook was a complete disaster. There was fire and the food was burnt in some places and raw in others. They lost a pan.

Now, she can handle simple dishes with ease, and even harder ones don’t seem to cause her much trouble when she tries. She’s probably better at cooking than Atsushi now, despite him being the one to teach her. Though, he really only showed her the basics, it’s not like he’s a master chef. The rest of it she did on her own.

“Thank you,” Kyouka replies, cheeks dusted with pink. Atsushi smiles. She’s gotten a lot better at accepting compliments, too.

Atsushi finishes cleaning up before getting dressed and ready for work. Kyouka is already waiting for him when he exits the bedroom.

“Alright, let’s head out,” Atsushi says as he slips on his shoes. Kyouka nods and follows him out the door. Atsushi pauses as Kyouka locks the door. A tickle builds in his throat and he clears his throat to try and relieve it. When that doesn’t work, he coughs until it goes away, throat burning. Maybe he will talk to Yosano today.

----------

Atsushi does not talk to Yosano that day. It’s a hectic, busy day and he forgets all about it.

But there’s no forgetting all about it the next day.

----------

Atsushi has just sat at his desk when he feels it. More than just a tickle, it’s a physical thing he can feel blocking his airway. He hurriedly goes to the bathroom, barely able to keep himself from coughing before he gets there.

It’s the most violent it’s been so far, he’s bent over the sink as he uncontrollably hacks, tears stinging his eyes and throat on fire. He coughs until the blockage makes its way into his mouth. He spits it into his hand and gasps for air, distantly noting the floral taste in his mouth. Atsushi tries to catch his breath, finding it harder than it should be. His breaths are slightly wheezy now. It almost seems like coughing this up dislodged something in his lungs and now a whole flood is going to come out. The feeling passes soon enough and Atsushi takes a deep breath, relief filling him when it feels normal.

Now that he can breathe easier, he looks at the object in his hand. It takes him a moment to realize that he’s holding a flower petal. It’s been crushed from him hacking it up and it’s covered in spit. He wipes it off and tries to straighten it out.

The petal is small and pink, easily fitting in the palm of his hand. He’s surprised something so little caused so much pain. Despite it’s size, it carries a strong floral scent tinged with citrus. He’s not well-versed in flowers, so he couldn’t say what kind of flower it’s from.

The kind of flower doesn’t really matter, though. The more important part is: why did he cough up a flower petal? How did he cough up a flower petal? Are there flowers inside of him? It certainly felt like there was something in his lungs earlier. Presumably, there still is. Is he going to have to cough all of it out?

Atsushi shakes his head. He doesn’t need to keep speculating. The first thing he should do is talk to Yosano like he should have done yesterday. Hopefully she’ll know what’s going on.

He carefully sets the petal in his pocket and then washes his hands. He leaves the bathroom and goes to Yosano’s office, knocking on the open door.

“Yes?” Yosano says, not looking away from the papers she’s writing on.

“Can I talk to you for a minute, Yosano-san?” Atsushi asks, voice hoarse from his coughing fit. Yosano pauses her writing and looks at Atsushi. She looks him up and down, undoubtedly noticing his discomfort and anxiety.

“Close the door,” she says, setting her pen down and standing up. Atsushi complies, shutting the door softly behind him. He walks forward.

“I just coughed this up,” Atsushi pulls the petal out of his pocket and holds it up for Yosano to see. She stares at it for a moment.

“I see. Do you have any other symptoms?” she asks while grabbing a stethoscope.

“I’ve been coughing for the past few days, but no fever or anything like that. After this one, though, it felt like there was something in my lungs,” Atsushi says.

“Okay, come sit,” Yosano gestures him over and Atsushi obliges. Yosano listens to his lungs, checks his blood pressure and temperature, and looks in his mouth.

“Hmm. Are you in love with anyone?” Yosano asks. Atsushi sputters at the non-sequitor, quickly devolving into a coughing fit. His chest tightens with each wracking cough as another petal climbs its way up his throat. He spits it into the tissue Yosano offers and wipes his mouth, panting from the effort.

“Sorry,” Yosano says, patting him on the back.

“It’s fine, but what does that have to do with anything?”

“Your symptoms and reaction just now are textbook for Hanahaki Disease. It causes flowers to grow in the lungs due to unrequited love.”

“There are actually flowers in my lungs?” Atsushi asks, ignoring the unrequited love part for now. That sounds really bad. Lungs are meant for breathing things, not growing things, “is there a way to get rid of them?”

Yosano sighs. Atsushi tenses. That’s not how he wants the response to a question like that to start. Don’t tell him feelings actually are going to kill him.

“There are two ways to get rid of them. One: if your love is returned, the flowers will naturally go away and you should have no lasting repercussions. Two: you can have the flowers surgically removed. This will permanently erase any and all feelings you have for the object of your affections. And, like with any surgery, things can go wrong. If you decide for neither of these, the flowers will eventually suffocate you,” Yosano explains.

Atsushi’s eyes widen. This cannot be real. If your feelings aren’t returned, you have to get rid of them completely or die. Obviously, living is better than dying, but the whole concept is so messed up. Surgery is an option now, but how long did this disease exist while people’s only option was to wither away, choking on feelings they couldn’t do anything about? Atsushi supposes it’s just another one of life’s cruelties. As if there aren’t enough of those already.

“If you would like to do the surgery, I have a specialist I can recommend you to,” Yosano offers, pulling Atsushi out of his thoughts. Right now isn’t the time to be lamenting the cruelties of life. He needs to focus on himself and what he’s going to do. There’s really only one option.

Atsushi shakes his head to answer Yosano. Before anything else, he needs to confess to Dazai. He won’t say he’s getting the surgery until he knows without a doubt that Dazai doesn’t love him. As much as it pains him to think about feeling nothing for Dazai, Atsushi isn’t going to let this love be what kills him.

“That’ll be plan B,” Atsushi says, standing up from his seat, “thank you, Yosano-san.”

“You’re welcome, Atsushi. I hope it works out for you,” Yosano replies. Atsushi inclines his head in gratitude. He heads to the door and grasps the handle. He takes a deep breath to steel himself. Atsushi flings the door open.

“Dazai-san! I have something to say to you!” Atsushi yells. Dazai jumps from where he was half asleep at his desk. Dazai’s eyes widen as Atsushi approaches him with determination, “but I’m not gonna say it here,” Atsushi says before pulling Dazai out of his seat and dragging him out of the office. Dazai goes willingly. Atsushi takes him away from the door and then lets go of Dazai. Atsushi squares his shoulders and meets Dazai’s flustered gaze.

“I’m in love with you,” Atsushi declares. Dazai goes still. Atsushi holds his breath, anticipation mounting. He’s on a precipice right now, and he’s either going to be pulled away to safety or shoved into the abyss. Whichever happens is fine because that’s simply how Dazai feels and Atsushi can’t change that. All Atsushi can do is hope for the best and prepare for the worst. He wonders how much the surgery will cost.

“You’re in love with me?” Dazai asks, voice and expression carefully blank.

“Yes,” Atsushi replies quietly but with conviction. He can’t let himself waver here, no matter what Dazai’s response is.

“You’re serious?” Dazai asks, confusion slipping through. Maybe Atsushi actually surprised Dazai. He didn’t think that was something he was capable of. Hardly anything seems to genuinely surprise Dazai.

“Of course I’m serious,” Atsushi says. There’s no reason for him to lie and he doubts Dazai doesn’t know that. Atsushi didn’t think Dazai would be so shocked. Although, he did spring this on him out of seemingly nowhere. It’s not like Dazai has the context of Atsushi’s diagnosis.

“We should go on a date, then,” Dazai replies with a nod.

“What?” Now it’s Atsushi’s turn to be surprised. Does this mean what Atsushi thinks it means?

“I’m saying that the feeling is mutual,” Dazai elaborates. Atsushi stares at Dazai. ‘The feeling is mutual.’ So, Dazai is in love with Atsushi. Dazai is in love with Atsushi. Dazai is in love with Atsushi. Atsushi’s heart flutters at the thought and he feels a smile stretch across his face.

“It is?” Atsushi asks, unable to keep the giddiness out of his voice.

“It is,” Dazai replies. He smiles at Atsushi, eyes sparkling with delight. Atsushi laughs, flooded with relief thanks to Dazai’s reciprocation. He was prepared to get the surgery if this ended poorly for him, but the thought of feeling nothing for Dazai terrified him. He’s unbelievably happy that he won’t have to know what that’s like.

Not too long ago, he realized that his feelings for Dazai weren’t strictly platonic. He’d planned to say something as soon as he realized that his feelings weren’t going to change, but there wasn’t a good moment that day, or the next, and so on. And the longer he went without saying anything, the harder it seemed to bring it up. He couldn’t help imagining worst case scenarios. But he needs to do it anyway, he can’t keep avoiding this.

He’s spent the day trying to figure out how he’ll do it, but he’s still not sure. He knows he doesn’t want to invite Dazai over. He doesn't want to ask Kyouka to go somewhere else and he's not willing to do it while she's there. The office isn’t a good idea because Atsushi shouldn’t do something like this during work hours and there’s still the issue of people being present. Dazai would never stay late enough for it to just be him and Atsushi. He should probably ask Dazai to go somewhere with him or meet him somewhere, but he can’t decide on where would be best.

Atsushi’s brought out of his thoughts by Dazai standing up and stretching next to him. Dazai’s jaw cracks in a yawn that he covers with his hand. Atsushi watches as he turns and walks to the door, exiting without a word. Atsushi is frozen for a moment before realizing this is the opportunity he was waiting for. It’s not time for him to clock out yet, but he’s not going to let that stop him. He’ll work overtime later or something.

He springs out of his chair and chases after Dazai, ignoring Kunikida’s reprimanding yell.

“Dazai-san!” he calls as he bursts into the hall, wincing as his voice cracks. That yell came out borderline desperate. He needs to get it together. Dazai turns to Atsushi, an inquisitive look on his face.

“Yes, Atsushi-kun?” Dazai asks.

“I wanted to talk to you real quick.”

“I’m listening.”

“Somewhere more private, please,” Atsushi mumbles, heart already racing. Dazai’s eyebrows raise briefly before he responds.

“Let’s walk and talk,” Dazai beckons Atsushi with a tilt of his head and slips his hands into his pockets as he begins walking away. Atsushi hurries to match his pace. Dazai takes the stairs down and Atsushi follows, taking deep breaths as quietly as he can to steady himself.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Dazai asks once they’ve made it to the sidewalk. The streets aren’t too crowded at the moment; it’s too early for rush hour traffic. Atsushi is grateful for that. Strangers overhearing this is a lot less stressful than people he knows overhearing it, but he still doesn’t particularly want an audience.

Atsushi goes to fidget with the strap of his bag across his chest before realizing he left it at the office and twists his fingers together instead. He keeps his eyes forward, unwilling to look at Dazai just yet. His stomach is a bundle of knots and he’s afraid he might throw up or pass out. This really is hard to do, but he has to do it. He won’t let himself back out. Not at this point. Atsushi turns to face Dazai.

“I like you, like, romantically,” Atsushi says, staring at Dazai’s tie, unable to make eye contact. His heartbeat thunders in his ears as he waits for a response. His eyes flicker up to see Dazai is already watching him, a smile on his face.

“I like you, too,” Dazai says.

“You do?” Atsushi blurts out, eyes wide. He wasn’t expecting that. It barely crossed his mind that Dazai could reciprocate, he was only thinking of how he’d take the rejection with grace and hopefully not cry.

“I do,” Dazai says, amusement evident in his voice. Atsushi can’t even be offended, he’s still too surprised.

“Does that mean we’re dating?” Atsushi asks unthinkingly. That’s usually how this goes, right? Dazai laughs before a mischievous smile appears on his face. Atsushi braces himself to be teased and/or embarrassed in some way. Dazai kneels and takes one of Atsushi’s hands.

“Atsushi-kun, will you do me the honor of going out with me?” Dazai asks, mirth dancing in his eyes. Atsushi‘s heart jumps and his face turns bright red. He hurries to pull Dazai back to his feet. Atsushi glances around to see if anyone is watching. Everyone out on the street is continuing on their way. No one is even looking at them. Atsushi breathes a sigh of relief. Dazai laughs and Atsushi’s head whips around to face him.

“Don’t laugh! This isn’t funny,” Atsushi says, worries completely forgotten and replaced entirely with annoyance as he shakes Dazai by the shoulders. If anyone saw that, they’d think he was proposing. Atsushi doesn’t need that kind of attention right now. Although, the gesture would be sweet if Dazai wasn’t doing it to cause a scene.

“It’s pretty funny. Your reaction was priceless,” Dazai says through his laughter. Atsushi sighs and drops his hands from Dazai’s shoulders. He has to concede, at least to himself, that it was kind of funny. He doesn’t think he’s moved so fast in his life, and he can only imagine what his expression looked like. If it had happened to someone else, he’d probably be laughing too. But that doesn’t make him less exasperated with Dazai for doing it.

“You didn’t answer my question, though,” Dazai says, taking Atsushi’s hands, “will you go out with me?”

Atsushi debates saying no just to mess with Dazai, but he’s sure it would backfire completely and Dazai would somehow find a way to tease Atsushi with it. He’d probably say something like ‘Atsushi-kun was the one who confessed to me in the first place. How could you not want to go out with me?’ while he gives his best kicked puppy expression. Atsushi shakes his head at his thoughts. No way does he want that to happen. Dazai gasps and Atsushi quickly realizes his mistake.

“Yes, I’ll go out with you. I’d love to go out with you,” Atsushi corrects immediately, unwilling to find out if his prediction was correct. Dazai smirks and, not for the first time, Atsushi wonders if Dazai can read minds. It feels like he knows exactly what Atsushi was thinking before.

“Why are you so nervous, Atsushi-kun?” Dazai asks innocently. Atsushi knows better. He sees that gleam in Dazai’s eyes. There’s no way he didn’t guess what Atsushi was thinking, and he’s still trying to tease him.

“Shut up,” Atsushi says. He can’t stand this man sometimes. Nevermind the fact that he genuinely likes him and said yes to dating him.

“Make me,” Dazai replies, a smug look on his face. Atsushi knows exactly what Dazai is doing. He’ll give him what he wants now, but Atsushi will have his revenge soon enough.

Atsushi leans forward and covers Dazai’s mouth with his own to keep him from saying anything else. Atsushi’s lips move with uncertainty despite his determination, not quite aligning with Dazai’s. Dazai meets Atsushi’s enthusiasm with experience as he steps closer and tilts Atsushi’s head up more, allowing their lips to fit together easier. Atsushi presses harder into Dazai and tangles a hand in his hair. Dazai wraps an arm around Atsushi in return. Their lips stay locked, sliding against each other, until Atsushi pulls away for air.

“Do-” Atsushi cuts Dazai off with another kiss despite his lack of oxygen. He just knows Dazai was going to tease him again. He still had that smirk on his face. Atsushi keeps this kiss shorter, a quick but passionate press of lips before Atsushi pulls away again.

“Don’t ruin the moment,” Atsushi says, still catching his breath. Dazai zips his lips and looks at Atsushi expectantly, clearly asking for another kiss. Atsushi huffs a laugh as he shakes his head. Dazai is going to be even more of a menace now, isn’t he?

Atsushi sighs and rests his head on his crossed arms over his knees, accidentally making eye contact with the stranger next to him who definitely wasn’t there earlier. Atsushi flinches at the stranger’s sudden appearance and the intensity with which the stranger is staring at him. It’s making Atsushi kind of nervous.

“Hello. Can I help you?” Atsushi asks apprehensively. Where did this guy even come from? Atsushi is on a very secluded part of the beach. He chose this spot because he didn’t think anyone else would come over here.

“You don’t remember me?” the stranger asks, crossing his arms with a pout. Atsushi doesn’t think he’s every seen this man in his life, but he takes a closer look at him to be sure. He’s tall and pale, with wavy brown hair and dark brown eyes. He’s not really dressed for the beach, wearing long sleeves and pants that would not be comfortable to get wet. Curiously, Atsushi can see bandages peeking out of his sleeves and at his collar, wrapping up his neck. He’s also not wearing any shoes.

“No, sorry,” Atsushi replies. He’s definitely never seen this guy before. Atsushi hopes he’s not looking for trouble or anything. Atsushi doesn’t think it’s likely given how he’s acting. He seems harmless, if a little strange.

“I know our meeting was brief, but I didn’t think I’d be this forgettable. Maybe this will help you remember,” he says as he starts to take his shirt off. Atsushi quickly looks away, heat rising to his cheeks.

“I really don’t think it will!” Atsushi says. The stranger laughs as Atsushi’s mind races. What is happening? Why is he taking his clothes off?! Does Atsushi need to run away?

Before Atsushi can make a decision, he hears a splash.

Atsushi looks back over to find a pile of clothes and ripples in empty water. He jumped into the water? Why? What is going on? Maybe Atsushi should leave, but he’s actually kind of curious.

A head of brown hair breaks the surface, and brown eyes that now seem to glow, speckled with gold, lock onto his. Atsushi is immediately thrown back in time, to his first and only time before now that he’d been on this same beach.

It was over a decade ago, on a school field trip.

----------

Atsushi was having a terrible time, as usual when it came to school (or most things in his life, really). No one wanted to be in a group with him and anyone who was either ignored him or bullied him. The only good thing about the trip was when they went to the beach.

Atsushi had left his group in search of a place where he could actually relax and maybe enjoy himself. His quest was successful when he spotted what looked to be a nice alcove that he’d only have to get a little wet to reach. He really thought it would be the perfect place to be alone, but he wasn’t alone when he got there.

A figure was lying on the rocks, frozen, and staring directly at Atsushi. Atsushi froze as well, captivated by their gaze, he’d never seen anything like it; slit pupils and brown irises that Atsushi would swear were glowing, flecked with gold. Their eyes glanced him over and Atsushi returned the favor. His attention was caught by the dark red tail glittering in the sunlight that made up their bottom half. Atsushi gasped. His eyes bounced between their equally mesmerizing tail and eyes as his mind tried to process that there was a mermaid right in front of him. In the flesh. He never thought mermaids actually existed.

The one in front of him didn’t look like what he imagined or saw pictures of from the stories. They didn’t have long flowing hair, their eyes were nothing like a human’s, their hands were webbed, and they had scales on their upper half. Although, their tail was very similar to a classic mermaid tail in shape. Atsushi thought they were beautiful.

Atsushi raised his hand and waved tentatively. The mermaid tilted their head, brown hair falling into their eyes, and copied his gesture with a webbed hand. Atsushi smiled. The mermaid smiled back.

“Hi,” Atsushi said. The mermaid stared at him for a moment before they made a noise Atsushi had never heard a human make, a kind of clicking sound. Atsushi tried not to be disappointed that they apparently didn’t speak the same language. There had to be some other way they could understand each other. Atsushi refused to let a language barrier stop him from making a friend.

Unfortunately, Atsushi’s attempts to forge a new friendship were stopped before they could even start as a voice called Atsushi’s name from close by.

Both Atsushi and the mermaid flinched. Atsushi turned towards the voice, surprised that someone was looking for him. He had quickly deduced that it was time to leave. There was no other reason for them to come find him. He turned back to the mermaid to apologize, regardless of the fact that they wouldn’t understand him. But when he looked, the mermaid was gone, not even a ripple left in the water.

----------

“You’re the mermaid!” Atsushi exclaims. He didn’t think they would ever see each other again. He was sure that mermaid would stay in his past as a cherished memory and a secret he would never share. But now that mermaid has appeared again, all grown up.

The mermaid laughs loudly, showing off those same sharp teeth.

“Yes, I’m the mermaid. Took you long enough,” the mermaid says.

“That’s not my fault. You looked completely different! And you didn’t speak a human language before,” Atsushi replies. How was he supposed to figure it out himself? There was nothing to give the mermaid away as being anything other than human.

“Well, I recognized you,” the mermaid refutes with a pout as he crosses his arms. Atsushi ignores the pang of guilt that makes him feel. He really couldn’t have known. Atsushi doesn’t have a good rebuttal, but it does make him wonder.

“How did you recognize me, anyway?” Atsushi asks. He didn’t think he was memorable enough for someone to recognize him a decade later after only seeing him once. It’s not like he’s anyone special.

“You have a very unique appearance,” the mermaid says. Atsushi feels a tinge of embarrassment. That’s true, but most of the time it doesn’t seem to matter. People still forget him, “but even if you didn’t, I’d still recognize you. You’re the first human I’d ever met. That makes you unforgettable to me.”

“Oh,” Atsushi says. He doesn’t know how to respond to that. He feels warm at the acknowledgement, but even more guilty for not recognizing the mermaid. There’s no need to beat himself up over it, though. Not being able to recognize him over a decade later while looking like a human and nothing like a mermaid doesn’t diminish the significance he holds in Atsushi’s life. He really shouldn’t feel bad about it. And he definitely won’t be forgetting what the mermaid looks like as a human. The mermaid laughs again.

“I can finally ask you now that we speak the same language. What’s your name?” the mermaid asks.

“Nakajima Atsushi. What’s yours?” Atsushi replies. The mermaid smiles.

“Atsushi,” he says slowly. Atsushi shivers at the way the mermaid’s voice caresses his name, “it’s a pleasure to properly meet you. My name is Dazai Osamu.”

Atsushi smiles. He’d always wondered what it could’ve been like, being friends with that mermaid. It seems that now he’ll get to find out.

~~~~~~~~~~

He decides to go to a store that’s farther away than his normal one, wanting to stretch his legs after all the sitting he’s been doing today. He’s grateful for this decision when he spots a dog along the way.

It’s got smooth-looking warm brown fur, floppy ears, and bright brown eyes. It’s laying on the sidewalk, panting hard like it couldn’t go any farther, and its tail begins to wag when it spots him. Kuroo’s lips instinctively pull into a smile. He looks around, but no one is waiting near the dog and no one on the street pays it any mind. It’s wearing a collar, he notices as he approaches.

The dog gets up once he nears it, its tail wagging even harder. Kuroo coos and crouches down to pet it. It’s much bigger up close. They’re basically at eye level like this. Its fur is just as smooth and silky as it looks. It’s clearly well taken care of, but there’s no one around who’s looking after it.

“You’re such a cute doggy,” he tells it as he lavishes it in attention. The dog responds by getting even more in his personal space and trying to lick his face. Kuroo laughs, almost getting knocked over by its insistent affection. He dodges most of the licks and shifts to check its collar.

It's a simple thick light-blue collar with two tags on it. Kuroo goes to check them, before noticing that they’re unreadable. They’re both covered in little marks that almost look like they were made by teeth. Despite them being deformed beyond readability, he can tell that one is a rabies tag and the other probably had a name and phone number before it was ruined.

Kuroo sighs, disappointed that he didn’t get to learn its name or the number of its owner. The dog, seeming to sense his change in mood, noses at his face again.

“You’re so sweet. I sure hope no one dumped you,” Kuroo smiles sadly. It’s unlikely considering it’s still wearing a collar, but not impossible. It does seem impossible for anyone to get rid of this sweetheart, though. Kuroo stands up and looks around again, hoping someone will appear and claim this absolute angel of a dog. No one does, but his gaze catches on a poster.

Lost Dog: Peanut - She loves people and isn’t aggressive at all! Please call xxx-xxx-xxxx if you see her!

Kuroo laughs a little at the name when he sees the picture of such a big dog. A dog that looks startlingly similar to the one at Kuroo’s feet. He looks down at the dog he’s with and then back at the poster. Yeah, that definitely looks like the same dog.

“Peanut,” he says. The dog looks up at him immediately, ears at attention. Kuroo nods to himself, definitely the right dog. He pulls out his phone and punches the number on the poster in. It rings a few times before someone picks up.

“Hello?” a voice answers hesitantly.

“Hi. I think I found your dog,” Kuroo replies.

“Where are you?” the voice asks hurriedly. Kuroo can hear them rushing around, presumably getting ready to get here as fast as possible. Kuroo responds with his location.

“I’ll be right there!” they exclaim before the line abruptly goes dead. Kuroo is pleased by that response. This is clearly someone who cares deeply for their dog. He puts his phone away and returns his attention to the dog still sitting patiently and staring up at him.

“I don’t have any treats for you, stop looking at me like that,” Kuroo says as he looks away, unable to bear the cuteness of such big brown eyes watching him so expectantly. He looks back seconds later, realizing he probably shouldn’t take his eyes off her before she’s back with her owner. He crouches down again to pet her more in hopes of keeping her attention. She leans into it, just as enthusiastic as before, and Kuroo smiles.

“You’re so cute, and I bet you know it,” he tells her. She simply wags her tail, clearly enjoying the attention she’s receiving. Suddenly, she stills and her ears perk up as she turns to look down the street, seconds before Kuroo hears rushing footsteps. He follows her gaze and sees a broad-shouldered man running full speed towards them.

“Peanut!” he yells out. And she takes off like a bullet to meet him, jumping into his arms immediately. The force takes them both to the ground. The man landing on his butt as Peanut covers his face in dog kisses, tail wagging so hard Kuroo’s surprised it doesn’t fall off.

The man endures the dog slobber with a wide grin on his face as he laughs before hugging her close and burying his face in her fur. Kuroo watches from afar, unwilling to interrupt such a sweet reunion.

Soon enough, the man pulls away and reaches into the bag he has with him. He quickly and efficiently slips a harness onto her and attaches a leash. He stands up and wags a finger, seemingly scolding her, and Kuroo can’t help the laugh that escapes his lips.

The man’s gaze snaps to Kuroo and he jogs over. Kuroo feels like he’s going to be blinded when that thousand-watt smile is turned on him and quickly looks away, turning his attention instead to the other parts of the man in front of him.

The first thing he notices is that this guy definitely works out. You don’t get that big of biceps from not. His legs fill out the leggings he’s wearing beautifully. Kuroo bets his ass looks great in them, too. He could definitely pick Kuroo up with ease.

Kuroo quickly pulls his focus back to the present moment, realizing he was just blatantly checking this stranger out.

“-only moved here recently and I don’t think she could find her way back. Ah, sorry for rambling. Thank you so much again. Is there anything I can do to repay you?” the guy finishes. Kuroo smiles and tries not to make it obvious that he didn’t hear the first half of whatever he said.

“It’s fine. You don’t need to repay me. I’m just glad she’s got a good owner to go home to,” Kuroo says. The only thing that matters to him in this situation is that she’s being treated well, and she definitely is. Being able to see such a touching reunion and meet a hot stranger is repayment enough, anyway.

“I insist! You have no idea how much this means to me,” the other replies earnestly. Kuroo holds back the smirk that’s wanting to stretch across his face. This is a perfect opportunity to take a chance.

“I really don’t need you to repay me, but if you insist, then you can buy me a drink,” Kuroo says. The other blinks owlishly, his smile frozen on his face, and Kuroo quickly backtracks.

“You don’t have to, obviously! Just figured I’d shoot my shot.”

“Sure. It’s a date.”

“Oh. Really?”

“Yeah, why not? You’ve got a nice smile and you clearly like dogs,” the other says simply.

“Two very important qualities to have,” Kuroo nods, easily hiding his amusement with a straight face.

“Exactly! You get it,” the other nods in agreement with a smile. There’s a brief moment of silence before they both laugh. Kuroo likes this guy’s laugh, it’s loud and unapologetic and suits him well.

“I guess I should introduce myself. I’m Kuroo Tetsurou,” Kuroo says once their laughter has subsided.

“Bokuto Koutarou,” his companion returns with a smile showing off his teeth. Kuroo still feels like he should look away, lest he be blinded. This time his gaze travels to Bokuto’s eyes.

Kuroo can’t believe he didn’t notice them earlier. They’re almost golden, like honey shining in the sun. Kuroo’s never seen anything like it, he didn’t know it was possible to have eyes that color. He could stare at them for hours and never get tired of it.

A bark pulls Kuroo’s attention down to Peanut, who’s wiggling impatiently as she stares up at both of them.

“Well, I should get this little escape artist home. You already have my number, so text me whenever you wanna meet up.”

“Okay,” Kuroo agrees easily.

“See ya,” Bokuto says with a wave, turning away with Peanut in tow. Kuroo watches him go with a smile on his face. He’s really glad he decided to come this way today.

Atsushi’s been here since before it even rose and he’ll be here until it sets, just like he has for the past week.

The water moves languidly, spilling onto the shore behind Atsushi in hushed waves, and seagulls cry overhead as they search for food.

A breeze ruffles Atsushi’s hair and fills his lungs with salty sea air. He sighs deeply. It’s barely into the morning, but he gets the feeling today won’t be the day either. Every time his day ends in disappointment, he wonders if he's too early or if something happened.

Atsushi closes his eyes and tries to bask in the peaceful atmosphere of the beach, pushing his worry and despondency to the back of his mind. He doesn’t want to waste time being upset over things he has no control over. All he can do is wait and see.

Atsushi lays back on the dock, placing his arms behind his head. The cold wood against his back is just shy of uncomfortable and he has to suppress a shiver. The air isn’t quite nippy anymore with the beginnings of spring, but it’s still cool outside without the sun having had time to warm things up.

Atsushi stays there, forcing his thoughts to focus on the feel of his feet dangling in the air, the sound of the waves hitting the shore and the trees rustling in the wind, the smell of the sea and wet wood, and not the fear that’s been persistently in the back of his mind for weeks. It always gets so much worse the closer it is to when his beloved is supposed to return.

Atsushi’s brooding is interrupted and his heart jumps into his throat when hands wrap around his ankles. His eyes snap open in alarm and a yelp escapes his lips as he jolts up.

“Did you miss me?” A voice asks. Atsushi recognizes it instantaneously.

“Don’t do that! You scared me!” Atsushi reprimands, breathing heavily from his burst of adrenaline. Dazai loves to surprise him, but he really needs to stop startling him like this. It’s going to take years off Atsushi’s life.

“But did you miss me?” Dazai repeats, eyes wide and pleading. Atsushi almost rolls his eyes. Almost.

“Of course I missed you,” Atsushi assures as he steadies his breathing to help return his heart rate to a less frantic pace.

When his heart no longer feels like it's going to escape his chest, Atsushi wiggles his legs to get Dazai to let go and slips into the water. He instinctively tenses at how cold it is, but the temperature doesn’t deter him from his goal. Now that he’s over his shock, he can’t go a second longer without Dazai in his arms.

Atsushi is immediately engulfed by Dazai’s embrace. Atsushi squeezes him tight, desperate to be as close as possible. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder and Atsushi’s inclined to agree every time Dazai returns to him.

“I missed you so much. I’m so glad you made it back safe,” Atsushi whispers. Dazai trills softly in response and Atsushi smiles.

In unison, they shift to share a kiss. Atsushi’s eyes fall closed as their lips meet and his mind empties, worries evaporating into nothing.

Their lips slide against each other, wet and salty from the seawater. Atsushi finally feels sated having Dazai’s lips locked with his own. The kiss remains unheated, a simple expression of joy and relief as they move together.

They break away eventually, lips reluctant to part. Atsushi’s eyes stay closed as he rests his forehead against Dazai’s, taking a moment to savor being able to hold Dazai again. He hasn’t seen him in three months and he refuses to be separated even an inch.

Atsushi has no way to keep in contact with Dazai while he’s gone, which means he has no way to know if he’s still alive until he shows up. Atsushi just keeps himself busy during the winter months when Dazai is gone, so he doesn’t drive himself to an early grave with his stress. It works well enough, but nothing works better than when he finally has Dazai back in his arms.

Hands caress his cheeks and Atsushi’s eyes open as he leans into the touch. Dazai's thumbs sweep under his eyes, careful not to cut him with his claws, and that’s when Atsushi realizes he’s been crying.

It doesn’t cross his mind to be embarrassed or hide his tears. He knows Dazai would never judge him for this.

“I’ll always come back to you,” Dazai replies easily, a soft smile on his lips. Atsushi’s heart swells with affection as more tears that Dazai gently wipes away spill from his eyes. He knows how important it is for Dazai to make this trip every year and it fills him with gratitude and contentment to know that he’s just as important to Dazai.

Atsushi smiles brightly, unbelievably happy that Dazai is in his life. He's the best thing to have ever happened to Atsushi.

A shiver suddenly wracks Atsushi’s body, and Dazai frowns at him.

“Let’s get out of the water. It’s much too cold for your fragile human constitution,” Dazai says, completely serious. Atsushi would scoff at that, but his shivering speaks for itself.

He had been too distracted with his elation and Dazai's mouth on his to fully process the freezing temperature of the water past his initial shock of it.

“I’m offended by that, but you’re not wrong,” Atsushi says anyway as he shudders again, letting Dazai drag him back onto the dock.

Atsushi grabs one of the towels he brought and wraps it tightly around himself before the wind can chill him even more. The sun has barely moved higher into the sky and does nothing to warm him.

Dazai pulls himself up after Atsushi, his beautiful dark red tail splitting effortlessly into legs. Atsushi marvels at the transformation every time he gets to see it. He knows it actually takes a lot out of Dazai, but Dazai never gives any indication that it does.

Dazai grabs the other towel and dries himself off before tying it around his waist.

“Come on. We need to get you somewhere warm,” Dazai says as he takes Atsushi’s hand and tugs him along. Atsushi goes willingly, endeared by Dazai’s concern. It’s much harder for mers to get sick than humans, and Dazai always panics and thinks Atsushi’s going to die whenever he gets sick, so Dazai takes every precaution he can to keep Atsushi from catching anything.

Atsushi’s not worried about getting sick. It’s barely a minute’s walk to get back home and he’s been cold for less than half an hour, and he has a very healthy immune system. But he would definitely prefer to be in the warmth of his house.

Atsushi’s sure Dazai will spend the next few days fretting over him and asking if he’s feeling unwell every hour. Atsushi’s kind of looking forward to it.

Although that’s probably just because he’ll be spending time with Dazai. Whatever they’re doing is unimportant, as long as they’re together.