*⠀THE⠀PARISH,

land stretched for miles, divided by dirt roads and what used to be flourishing fields of people's livelihood. the world around them had been crumbling with every breath long enough to get used to the stun; weather and decay corroded places they'd never set foot. the difference on a not-so-sunny day in the middle of gorgia? ellis hadn't said a word. ring-decorated fingers curled thoughtful around worn leather wheel, blues drifting from the endless span of dust and to the back left seat.

" hey, ellis- " nick began, quiet and low in his throat to avoid rousing the stifled grief and partially snoozing passengers. hand reached to readjust the rearview mirror, almost forcing their eyes to meet through it's reflection. " this's ... probably pretty hard on ya. " recognized, before his gaze returned to the road. " you alright? ... wanna take the wheel? "

⠀⠀⠀⠀maybe he just wanted to see what became of it, maybe he hoped he'd come here and his mother would be waiting for him with the front door wide open, a figure in the mirror waving him to come inside. lost in the depths of his thoughts, this hasn't been home for a long time — but the grief threatens to strangle him 'til he's blue in the face all the same.

⠀⠀⠀⠀when nick says his name, ellis practically jumps out of his own body. it feels deafening in the small space of the cabin, feeling nick's heavy gaze on him in the rear - view mirror. it's too much, and ellis feels like there's bugs crawling beneath his skin. he can't meet nick's gaze in the mirror, and looking outside the window is too harrowing a sight : so he settles on staring down at his lap instead. ❝ i'm fine. ❞ it's quick, short. ellis' voice has never sounded so tight even to his own ears. ❝ we've all lost things, this ain't any different. ❞

attachment was a normal man's game; not the kind men like him grew to knew, all it tended to do was shackle and drag. it got in the way, proved useless in the games he played and most of the time: hurt more than anything else when severed. nick had a few hard lessons to learn, since the infection swallowed everything they knew. reliance, cooperation. survival was still survival, but not the kind one could face alone. none at all fitting for a conman, as much as he wanted it to be.

the hardest of all were reminders that they were in fact, still human. fragile against overpowered jaws and mutations beyond comprehension. a scratch or bite here and there had become a normalcy, routine, and a plan around it persisted. one of their own, ripped to shreds and barely hanging on was not. the gnawing ache in his chest, clawing out between his ribs, he remembered why he didn't get too close. though the break of dawn, crack of eyelids; he found he wouldn't trade it back for anything.

" hey- hey, yeah. " nick half shushed, suddenly roused from pathetic slump, his voice half covered by the screech of scooting chair. hands bore harsh on the armrests, sunken eyes kept locked onto ellis' face. " you look like shit, too. " scoffed in a relief he couldn't describe, slight shake in his hand as he reached to move hair away from damp forehead. " you're lucky you woke the fuck up, el. 'course ya feel like shit. "

⠀⠀⠀⠀ellis takes a moment to clear his throat, brain sitting in a thick mixture of fog inside of his skull. maybe it's the pain meds, or maybe it's the pinch of worry in nick's brows that has ellis feeling so sick to his stomach. he turns his head to look away, if only so the idea of somehow meaning so much to somebody doesn't feel so overwhelming.

⠀⠀⠀⠀ellis flinches at the screech of metal on linoleum, but the annoyance quickly subsides when he feels nick's hand on his forehead, pushing his hair back. ❝ y ' still think i look cute at least ? ❞ ellis muses, able to crack half a smile ( or at least a semblance of one ) towards nick at his bedside.

365 days of music

Day: 3

These friends, they don’t love you

They just love the hotel suites, now

lips  are  quick  to  press  together  with  lids  snapping  shut.  sometimes  she  wondered  how  he'd  lasted  so  long  and  what  he  had  done  before,  but  she  huffs  and  carries  on  in  humourous  camaraderie.  ❝  well,  everything  here's  pretty  damn  useless  if  you  ask  me  but  go  on-  ❞  feet shuffle  the  same  line  as  a  shadow,  up  and  over  @bullsh1fter  shoulder  in  case  he  missed  anything  through  the  few tinted windows.  not  that  jimmy  gib's  again.