Her eyes. The world. I couldn’t look away. They were dreams and sorrow. Laughing and fire. They pulled me down, down, and I forgot to breathe. As if this is some kind of trap. A trap that I never want to escape. Mesmerizing.

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Her eyes. The world. I couldn’t look away. They were dreams and sorrow. Laughing and fire. They pulled me down, down, and I forgot to breathe. As if this is some kind of trap. A trap that I never want to escape. Mesmerizing.

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When she switches to her fingertips. Slowly tracing, carefully. Recklessly. That’ll drive you mad. Making you want more. For it to be all over you. Suffocating you. The perfect misery.
When I dance, I wonder if they see it? Can they see it on my face? Don’t want them to know the real reason I sway.
The head. The heart. The shoulders. Heavy do they play.
This is my aesthetic. I've found it at last. mountain road signs bearing sexual puns.

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To be here.
In between your words…
who are you fucking
im fucking tired bitch that’s who
People are so unaware how observant other people are. I’m not even trying to see all that.

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"you talk to yourself?" yeah, that's my homie
Empathy is how we move forward.
What the Fuck Do I Write?
How?
Writing used to come so easy.
It rolled like words off of my tongue
but more precise and with an intent.
Man do I miss…
The way I talked between the lines.
So much to say.
On that don’t-have-anywhere-to-be-time.
I was full of thoughts, questions, desires.
Patiently waiting for the paper to talk back.
Laugh back?
Perhaps one day reveal all that I sought.
Haha. Wishful thinking.
The connection was needed.
The led, the sheet was meaning. Was me.
My mess.
Mess that stretched from nothing to my stars.
It cried to the moon.
Now, how is it so hard to find the words.
*Scoff* As I sit here questioning myself and this world….
Damn, I just wanna write.
But no sentence is right.
Indecisive letters erased and retraced.
I’m frustrated.
This paper is frustrated, smudged, overworked.
Fuck.
Lacking confidence and trust in this.
Once my process, my release, my bliss.
Whew! Fuck.
It’s just me here and still I hide.
Behind scrambled thoughts and
what the fuck do I write.
Feeling lost but it’s pushing me towards something, I feel it.
5/07/22 | Krewella | NOLA

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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