[unhinged barking]

"Seth is... Seth's a pro. He'll handle business even if he's banged up. It's the job. He knows it. He's the man for a reason." — Bron Breakker on Seth Rollins; footage from the night Seth had to be written off TV following his shoulder injury

for any that include "[insert wrestler/ship here]", include the wrestler or ship's name in your ask!

🩸 - if you could drink any wrestler's blood, whose would it be? why?

📚 - tell us your favorite wrestling fanfic!

🎶 - what song do you associate with [insert wrestler here]?

🦷 - biting your favorite wrestler. biting them biting them biting them biting them

🎬 - if you could put your favorite wrestler in a movie (if they're an actor, one that they aren't in), what would it be?

🪞 - do you see yourself in your favorite wrestler? what about them do you relate to?

🔬 - is there any wrestler you'd like to put in a big glass box to observe their behavior?

💼 - if [insert wrestler here] was NOT a wrestler, what job do you think they would have?

🛸 - what wrestler is most likely to be abducted by aliens? (other than cody rhodes)

👥️ - how would your two favorite wrestlers act in a storyline together?

🏠 - would you want to be roommates with your favorite wrestlers?

🫯 - what would [insert wrestler here] do if they were placed in a room with their clone?

🌀 - HOLY SHIT. [insert ship OR wrestler here] has been dropped into an alternate universe. where are they? what's going on???

the larger piece is entitled Samoa Joe Has Been Voted Sexiest Man Alive For The Twentieth Year In A Row and has this text on it in braille, which I wrote (by hand):

The champ is here – the 25 year old world champion rests in the corner of the barricade, glistening with sweat. The competitor in the two-toned trunks is billed at 6'2" 270 lbs. His wrist tape is white, for now.

His lips are parted and his thighs are spread in his squatting position, elbows resting on the barricade walls. His mid-thigh trunks ride up. the lights in the high school gymnasium bounce off the shiny fabric.

The wrestler shaves everything below his eyebrows, which are thick. The dark hair on his head is thick and full as well, cut respectably yet fashionably short. His eyelids are shiny with sweat, resembling the glitter of eyeshadow.

14 months, 19 men, and none of them get it done. CM Punk thinks he can take the belt tonight, but he is sadly mistaken. Samoa Joe is professional wrestling, and he cannot be beat.

the smaller piece is entitled That Fat Ass Samoa Joe and has this text on it in braille, quoting the Big Bad Booty Daddy Big Poppa Pump and Lauren Thompson in the Steiner Math promo:

See, but I'm gonna break it down for all you ladies: would you rather be with me? Or would you rather be with Joe?

"Well, I think Joe's kinda nice, I mean, y'know..."

YES im so glad you asked me this omg. lets go with 5

- the retroactive pieces fit to match all your embellishments

- the only reason im alive is waiting for the ai to do some tight shit and lemme suck its fucking dick

- look the other way, darkness in the shaaade

- Super Beefed Up

It's not every day you get to give your blorbo what he wants for his birthday! But I'm pretty broke rn, so on top of the small amount I can afford to give, I will be offering a 3+ sentence ficlet to anyone who donates a minimum of $5 USD to Sami For Syria!

For that length, I'm willing to try almost any WWE character, ship and prompt, except sexual content involving minors and direct sibling or parent incest. Yes, I'll even write Cody. Hell, I'll try reader insert

If you donate a larger amount of money ($18 USD or more), I'd be happy to answer 3+ prompts for you, or turn one of them into a full-sized ficlet if the inspiration strikes! I'm also down to write for other fandoms, but please contact me first to make sure it's something I'm familiar with

Donate to Sami for Syria here!

Ilja Dragunov vs Baron Corbin