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YOU ARE THE REASON
Xuebing Du
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@bravedstars
⸻ this is a slow activity + heavily plot based writing blog for YASMIN KHAN of bbc’s doctor who. private, selective, duplicate friendly. multiverse & multiship. as cherished by louise. 23. gmt. est january 2020.
memes. headcanons. development. promo. carrd. wishlist. interest tracker.
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thinking about yaz meeting 14 and 15 thanks
PROMPTS FOR THE RELUCTANT HERO * assorted dialogue, adjust as necessary
i'm sorry. you must be mistaken.
no one ever stopped and asked me if this was what i wanted.
i don't know what else to tell you. i'm not a hero. i can't do this.
go find someone else to do it.
i can't be what you need me to be.
if you care so much, why don't you do it?
there's been some sort of mix up. i'm no hero.
how can you believe in me when i don't even believe in myself?
there's no way i can fix this.
you picked the wrong person.
i was never cut out for a job like this.
i'm the least violent person you will ever meet.
you're setting an expectation for me that i just can't fulfill.
what, you think i'm the only one who can solve this?
stop treating me like some chosen one.
find someone else to solve this, because i can't!
you can't run from your destiny!
without you, all hope is lost.
i was never going to be what you wanted.
it's been you all along.
i never wanted this.
i'm not fighting anybody!
how many lives were lost because of me?
tell them to figure it out for themselves!
you have no idea how i'm feeling right now.
i'm not cut out for this!
i'm not who you think i am.
you're asking a lot from me.
i can't have them all relying on me like that.
there's too much pressure. i'm not ready for that.
too many lives are at stake.
i'm not a leader! i can't be trusted to lead anyone!
why can't you solve it? why does it have to be me?
i told you, i'm not a hero.
this is your destiny.
i'm quite content living my very normal life, thank you very much.
no one told me i was meant to do that.
you've got the wrong guy.
there must be some mistake. that's not me.
you want me to do what now?
whoa whoa whoa. i never said i would do that.
that wasn't part of the plan!
you're the only one who can fix this.
you can't turn me into someone i'm not.
what they said back there about me... was it true?
have you been keeping this from me all this time?
and you think i'm the one who can fix this. is that it?
i've never done anything like that before. what makes you think i can suddenly do it now?
they sent for you by name.
this has been written in the stars for longer than you've been born.
i feel the pressure on my shoulders, the weight of the world on my back.
you're the one we've been waiting for.
i don't know what you expect me to do.
that's not what we agreed on.
stop looking at me like that.
i don't want anyone to put me on a pedestal.
sorry to disappoint you, but that's not me.
i'm not sticking around to find out.
without you, we will fail. what part of that do you not understand?
you can't just give up now.
you are the chosen one.
without your help, people will die.
do you understand what you mean to these people?
they need a symbol of hope. you can be that symbol.
more random dialogue prompts ,
“why do you have that look on your face?”
“finish what you’re doing, we have to talk.”
“what have you done to yourself?”
“did you do something different with your hair?”
“it doesn’t do any good to get worked up.”
“when was the last time we had a real conversation.”
“are you in the witness protection program, or what?”
“there’s something wrong with me.”
“no, i don’t hate you.”
“hey stupid.”
“we’re aren’t them.”
“looks like i’ll live long enough to make you pay.”
“you know you’re wrong.”
“i don’t understand, why are you doing this?”
“now, before i say anything, promise me you’ll stay calm.”
“what makes me so special?”
“you have no idea what i’ve been through.”
“you really don’t have to do that, not for me.”
“did you really think you’d get a second chance?”
“how about we don’t do that.”
“i have a lot going for me, but humility is not one of them.”
“you’re the worst.”
“i don’t need you right now.”
“don’t just stand there, looking at me.”
“i thought you were supposed to call me.”
“take my hand.”
“i need you.”
“you’re allowed to need help sometimes.”
“for someone who doesn’t like to feel things, you sure feel a lot of it out loud.”
“when this is all over, i want it to be you and me.”
“why won’t you tell me what happened?”
“you don’t know what this means to me.
“i know it doesn’t make sense.”
“i’m trying really hard to keep it together.”
“i know you’re new, but we do things a little differently here.”
“your voice is putting me to sleep.”
“did you find what you were looking for?”
“you knew and you didn’t even warn me?”
“well, i guess that’s broken.”
“i thought it was part of the act.”
“you think u don’t know you’re only here because they sent you?”
“you promised to call me if you didn’t know what to wear.”
“you can keep a secret, can’t you?”
“how could you do this to me?”
“put the gun down, dearest. i have news!”
“i know you don’t have any reason to trust me, but you need to know something.”
“if you’re here to tell me what happened last night, someone beat you to it.”
“people think i’m weird.”
“i think i’m losing myself again.”
“you can’t be here.”
“i wish you’d come to the funeral.”
“do you know what today is?”
“so, you broke my favourite mug… and you’re breaking up with me?”
“i need to get out.”
“it’s like i’m cursed or something.”
“you are remarkably well-behaved tonight, what have you been up to?”
“you gonna eat that?”
“sir, the pony rides are for children only.”
“i don’t want you to worry about that anymore.”
“we’ll never make it in time.”
“you’d be late for your own funeral.”
“you should have seen it coming.”
“oh, good, you’re here! hold this.”
“why can’t you just be happy for me?”
“on a scale of one to ten, how do you feel about nachos right now?”
“is this how you flirt with everyone?”
“how much longer till we’re there?”
“what have you done?”
“it’s time for you to repay that debt you owe me.”
“where did you get that? who gave it to you?”
“what kind of mother has thoughts like that?”
“i know I haven’t been what you needed, but i’m here, and i wanna help.”
“i never want to hear you say that again.”
“you’re all i have.”
“i know it’s not perfect, but i did follow the recipe this time.”
“i was doing so well until you showed up.”
“don’t eat that! i made it ‘specially for our guest.”
“it’s not that i don’t like my life, it’s that i don’t have the energy to enjoy it.”
“how can you stand this place?”
“don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t exactly blend in.”
“you need to stop.”
“i don’t like that look, what happened?”
“is that seriously your password?”
“what’s your problem?”
“you had no right to use it without asking.”
“oh, wow, you weren’t kidding.”
“i couldn’t trust my own parents to protect me.”
“i’m surprised you haven’t been arrested yet. wait, no, i’m not.”
“why do you want to help me?”
“ten bucks for that piece of crap?”
“we have to hurry, they’re coming!”
“hey, look what came in the mail!”
“do you want to get a drink or something?”
“please tell me you didn’t eat that.”
“the worst part is you didn’t even notice.”
“if i wanted help, i would have asked.”
“wanna tell me what’s going on with your grades?”
“you need to leave.”
“talk to me, okay? i need to know what’s going on.”
“i do blame you.”
“sometimes life deals you a bad hand, but you can still play your cards right and win.”
“you’re no longer useful to me.”
“i’m not good with sarcasm: if you don’t like me, just say it.”
❛ what are you doing out here by yourself? ❜
"me?" yasmin's brows furrow into a confused frown, hands raising to point towards herself in question before recognition dawned on soft features. "nothing really, you know, just taking in the scenery and all that. had reports of a few weird things going on in the area so thought i'd come out and take a look. never been out here before, actually. it's a decent area. you live here? must be nice." she's aware of how rambly she must appear but ever since her departure from the tardis, yasmin has been nothing short of bored and antsy --- praying for some sort of adventure to preoccupy herself with. nothing could ever beat the adrenaline of investigating something out of the ordinary.
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PROMPTS FOR THE RELUCTANT HERO * assorted dialogue, adjust as necessary
i'm sorry. you must be mistaken.
no one ever stopped and asked me if this was what i wanted.
i don't know what else to tell you. i'm not a hero. i can't do this.
go find someone else to do it.
i can't be what you need me to be.
if you care so much, why don't you do it?
there's been some sort of mix up. i'm no hero.
how can you believe in me when i don't even believe in myself?
there's no way i can fix this.
you picked the wrong person.
i was never cut out for a job like this.
i'm the least violent person you will ever meet.
you're setting an expectation for me that i just can't fulfill.
what, you think i'm the only one who can solve this?
stop treating me like some chosen one.
find someone else to solve this, because i can't!
you can't run from your destiny!
without you, all hope is lost.
i was never going to be what you wanted.
it's been you all along.
i never wanted this.
i'm not fighting anybody!
how many lives were lost because of me?
tell them to figure it out for themselves!
you have no idea how i'm feeling right now.
i'm not cut out for this!
i'm not who you think i am.
you're asking a lot from me.
i can't have them all relying on me like that.
there's too much pressure. i'm not ready for that.
too many lives are at stake.
i'm not a leader! i can't be trusted to lead anyone!
why can't you solve it? why does it have to be me?
i told you, i'm not a hero.
this is your destiny.
i'm quite content living my very normal life, thank you very much.
no one told me i was meant to do that.
you've got the wrong guy.
there must be some mistake. that's not me.
you want me to do what now?
whoa whoa whoa. i never said i would do that.
that wasn't part of the plan!
you're the only one who can fix this.
you can't turn me into someone i'm not.
what they said back there about me... was it true?
have you been keeping this from me all this time?
and you think i'm the one who can fix this. is that it?
i've never done anything like that before. what makes you think i can suddenly do it now?
they sent for you by name.
this has been written in the stars for longer than you've been born.
i feel the pressure on my shoulders, the weight of the world on my back.
you're the one we've been waiting for.
i don't know what you expect me to do.
that's not what we agreed on.
stop looking at me like that.
i don't want anyone to put me on a pedestal.
sorry to disappoint you, but that's not me.
i'm not sticking around to find out.
without you, we will fail. what part of that do you not understand?
you can't just give up now.
you are the chosen one.
without your help, people will die.
do you understand what you mean to these people?
they need a symbol of hope. you can be that symbol.
* your desire originates in the SOUL of the universe , ( © )
&. 𝐯𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.
( a mix of angst, fluff, and plot focused dialogue prompts in the form of questions. feel free to change how you seem fit. )
❛ what are you listening to? ❜
❛ can’t sleep? ❜
❛ how did you get this scar? ❜
❛ are you sure this is a good idea? ❜
❛ do you mind if i sleep here tonight? ❜
❛ what are you doing out here by yourself? ❜
❛ are you wearing my shirt? ❜
❛ don’t you know what you mean to me? ❜
❛ will i see you again? ❜
❛ are you comfortable? ❜
❛ are you trying to get us in trouble? ❜
❛ do you enjoy playing with people’s hearts? ❜
❛ don’t we deserve to be happy? ❜
❛ why can’t i come with you? ❜
❛ are you here to kill me? ❜
❛ you think i’m jealous? ❜
❛ do you want to share this? ❜
❛ is that blood? is it yours? ❜
❛ how do you know my name? ❜
❛ you’re an asshole, you know that? ❜
❛ like what you see? ❜
❛ was that your first kiss? ❜
❛ are you happy here with me? ❜
❛ sorry, did you want to be alone? ❜
❛ do you want my jacket? ❜
❛ how are you still alive? ❜
❛ you’re beautiful, you know that? ❜
❛ what are you so afraid of? ❜
❛ today isn’t your day, is it? ❜
❛ how does it feel to be in love? ❜
❛ you’ve been crying, what’s wrong? ❜
❛ do you remember when we first met? ❜
❛ isn’t this amazing? ❜
❛ did you miss me? ❜
❛ alright, who am i beating up? ❜
❛ that was a close call, wasn’t it? ❜
❛ am i worth so little to you? ❜
❛ how is it you’re never scared? ❜
❛ do you ever think about the future? ❜
❛ can you look at me? please? ❜
❛ you got me flowers? ❜
❛ well, how do i look? ❜
❛ what aren’t you telling me? ❜
❛ how about a kiss before i go? ❜
❛ you don’t know who i am, do you? ❜
❛ may i have this dance? ❜
❛ who’s going to stop us, huh? ❜
❛ wait, you’re leaving already? ❜
❛ it’s my fault, isn’t it? ❜
❛ have you ever lost someone? ❜
❛ do you think i’m a good person? ❜
❛ what are you thinking about? ❜
❛ is it really you? ❜
❛ what if i hurt you? ❜
❛ if you won’t take care of yourself, then who will? ❜
❛ have you come to laugh at me? ❜
❛ will you still look at me like you do now? ❜
* 400 RANDOM DIALOGUE PROMPTS (READ MORE) ,
"i never noticed your eyes were this pretty."
"i'll stay in tonight, thanks."
"i can't even trust myself anymore."
"anything to eat around here?"
"i hope to repay your kindness someday."
"you're a terrible flirt you know."
"the only time you talk to me is when you need something."
"how did you find me?"
"how can i possibly trust you? after all you've done."
"i take orders from your father, not you."
"you're not a very convincing liar."
"i thought i'd never see you again."
"why can't i come with you?"
"it was my fault. it was all my fault."
"all this anger and hate, it's not good for you."
"this is the part where you apologize."
"is being drunk an excuse?"
"let me out of here! let me go!"
"aren't we in a good mood today?"
"i was making sure you weren't dead, since you never called."
"there's nothing left for me here."
"i know i lied to you. you can hate me and it's all right."
"i've been waiting for you for a long time."
"what happened? i heard a crash."
"was it you? did you do all this?"
"don't come any closer!"
"looking for something?"
"you're too scared to do it, aren't you?"
"i thought you'd like this."
"you came back!"
"i like seeing you smile."
"i must warn you, i won't go easy on you this time."
"it's better to expect disappointment."
"sorry to put you through that. i guess i owe you one now."
"no way, i'm not doing that."
"it's you! you came for me."
"could you be happy here with me?"
"let me buy you another drink."
"why should i trust you?"
"he's only mostly dead."
"knowledge is power."
"i screwed up. i know."
"we're going to have to stay here tonight."
"help me choose something to wear?"
"i do care."
"i'm sorry, i'm not what you think i am."
"how many more people need to die before you're satisfied?"
"you scared me."
"just try to hang on."
"i risked my life for you!"
"two years later and you haven't changed."
"we're not so different after all."
"i need you to trust me."
"why are you being so stubborn?"
"you don't scare me."
"i'm scared of what you're becoming."
"you look like you just saw a ghost."
"that's quite a scratch you've got there."
"i've always hated it."
"this is the part where you leave."
"don't treat me like a child."
"you were talking in your sleep."
"what are you doing out here by yourself?"
"wait. i've heard that sound before."
"would it be alright if i borrowed this?"
"i think i have a bit more experience with this thing than you do."
"it's not stealing if it was mine to begin with."
"it's nothing personal."
"you were going to leave without saying goodbye?"
"i'll still be here when you wake up."
"don't you fucking dare!"
"you're lucky you're cute."
"it's too dark, i can't see anything."
"i swear it wasn't me."
"that is not an appropriate question to ask a lady you've just met."
"i've got your back, okay?"
"how long have i been asleep?"
"just who do you think you are?"
"i think i might've broken something..."
"i wish you'd take better care of yourself."
"is this what you wanted?"
"what do you want in exchange for it?"
"did you miss me?"
"i'm trying my best and it's not good enough."
"it's not safe for people to see us together."
"don't lie to me."
"i see a lot of myself in you."
"take a seat, we're gonna be here a while."
"i won't hate you. i know you think that's what you deserve but it's not."
"who do you fight for?"
"it's rare to see your kind around here."
"walk with me?"
"i know you better than you think."
"why did you bring me here?"
"what did you want to tell me?"
"you don't even know my name."
"it's nothing, i'm just tired."
"of course i care. you're my family."
"i didn't tell you because i was afraid... of losing you."
"where is my candy, you son of a bitch?"
"you want me to punch him in the face?"
"please... say something."
"who the hell invited you?"
"we need to be careful."
"i just wanted to say i'm sorry."
"we're locked in!"
"don't be naked. i'm coming in."
"do you ever get afraid?"
"you wouldn't understand."
"promise you'll say something if you need help?"
"where have you been?"
"there was blood everywhere."
"i just need to step away for a bit, get some fresh air."
"we're safe, aren't we?"
"how about a little midnight snack?"
"how many people have you killed? how many?"
"whatever you're going to ask, the answer is no."
"you look... amazing."
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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* your desire originates in the SOUL of the universe , ( © )
seriouslyaliens.
“I’ve been alive a long time, Yaz. Too long, I sometimes think. A lot can happen in a year. Now imagine thousands.” The Doctor pauses, letting out a breath. It’s true they often doubt if humans can fully understand them. “That’s a lot of time, and I’ve not always done good with it.”
“ so what you’re saying is that there’s lots of unresolved things playing on your mind? ” yasmin didn’t know what it was like to live for centuries, that much was obvious : but she desperately wanted to help them for whatever it was worth. “ nobody’s perfect, doctor. we all do things that we end up regretting, but that’s the whole point. we’re supposed to make mistakes so we can learn and do better. i know you’ve not always done good, i don’t think anyone really has. it’s what you decide to do now that’s most important. ”
reflecting back on what thirteen said to the fam: “ you’re not gonna come back as the same people that left here. ” yasmin didn’t fully understand the weight of that sentence at the time. obviously she knew that travelling with the doctor comes at a price at the best of times, especially after what happened to grace sinclair; but she truly did not comprehend what that could mean for her. it’s only years later, particularly during and after flux, that it finally holds it significance to her. yaz had no idea what she was getting herself into, only that she was excited for something brand new in her life as she was fed up of the normal 9-5. she proved her worth time and time again : and ended up craving the adventure that the doctor and their tardis provided. it wasn’t an easy road to take, with all the obstacles that stood in her path, but she wouldn’t have traded it for anything.
yaz still owns the tardis key that the doctor gave her. ever since they left to go and regenerate, a part of yasmin has felt empty. travelling gave her a sense of purpose, a usefulness, that she never truly had at home. she wants to do good and help people. returning to normal life was painstaking and extremely hard : the only ones keeping her sane were those who had also journeyed with the doctor, those with shared experiences. yaz definitely leaned on the remainder of the fam, but especially dan who she spent three years with during the flux. her tardis key is something she holds dearly, it’s a reminder of the past few years she spent with them, and it’s a symbol of hope that one day the doctor will return for her. her heart is still broken, she loves the doctor fiercely but quietly, and it’s proving hard to let them go.
magistraes.
“Magistra, now, bestie. Turning a new leaf, smelling the roses, you get it.” A step forward, arms behind her back, smile on her face. “Do you like what I’ve done with myself? Took a page out of The Doctor’s book. After taking something else of hers, but you know that.”
yasmin’s face holds an incredulous expression, nails slightly digging in to her arm with how tightly she’s holding herself. “ magistra, seriously? ” brows raise with surprise. “ do you really think that after all you’ve done that you get to just walk away and pretend that it’s all finished and behind us? you tried to kill me and my friends multiple times, why should i believe a word that comes out of your mouth? ” the anger feels hard to contain, especially after she mentions what happened to the doctor.
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@wasme.
it had been three months since the doctor had dropped her off to embark on one last trip before her untimely regeneration. yasmin was devastated, and that was only the beginning of whatever emotion bubbled under her skin : begging to be freed from the constraints of her flesh. it wasn’t meant to end this way. now she was out there somewhere with a new face, going through it all alone. yaz didn’t want it to be like that. worse still, adjusting to normal everyday life had become vastly more difficult than she anticipated. it wasn’t as if she hadn’t done it for years before knowing the doctor even existed. it felt cruel to go back to mundane life knowing what was out there.
whatever train of thought yasmin had as she walked through her local park was cut short when the all too familiar hum of the tardis’ engine rang in her ears. a sudden hit of adrenaline coursed through her body as she sprinted to find the blue box, looking just the way it had, parked on a street corner. yaz nervously stepped forward, taking a breath before knocking a few times. “ doctor, you in there? ”
seriouslyaliens.
“There’s a lot I should’ve done and even more I shouldn’t have done.”
@bravedstars — call.
“ don’t think like that, doctor. there’s so much i still don’t understand, but i need you to be willing to talk to me about the things that are on your mind : i can’t help if you won’t let me. ”
