survivor.

no, i don't think it changes my feelings for him, i guess. it's hard to say. I'm really happy he has a partner that loves him, and seems to be good to him. so i think I'm happy for him.

I'm, at least, glad he is my friend and he approached me, and somehow trying to get closer right now. i didn't expect it. but i also didn't know he never hated me like i thought he did.

I'm really glad for all of it.

anyways i can't tell him anything about how i am feeling because i am certain I'll come off as pushy and needy even if I'm not really asking anything from him i Know he will feel the pressure from me and i don't want it. i don't even know what i want to be for him anymore? i guess i just gave up on my own happiness so whether i am happy or not, i don't really care anymore.

it's not that i don't want to be his girlfriend anymore, i just feel like by playing my own rule i am being a burden, so im just shutting down my own feelings. is that right? absolutely not.

but i don't wanna be the toxic manipulatice one again.

does it mean I'm almost killing myself? yeah

si me abriste pero no te reconocí

de tu vida ya me sacaste