she had a name

Audre: I don’t see that as the point. I’m not questioning anyone’s right to live. I’m saying we must observe the courses and implications of our lives. If we are talking about feminism then the personal is political and we can subject everything in our lives to scrutiny. We have been nurtured in a sick, abnormal society, and we should be in the process of reclaiming ourselves, not the terms of that society. This is complex. I speak not about condemnation but about recognizing what is happening and questioning what it means. I’m not willing to regiment anyone’s life. If we are to scrutinize our human relationships, we must be willing to scrutinize all aspects of those relationships. The subject of revolution is ourselves, is our lives.

Sadomasochism is an institutionalized celebration of dominant/subordinate relationships. And, it prepares us either to accept subordination or to enforce dominance. Even in play, to affirm that the exertion of power over powerlessness is erotic, is empowering, is to set the emotional and social stage for the continuation of that relationship, politically, socially and economically.

When it comes to believing trans women r biologically men and therefore should not be referred to as women etc, like… what about the instances in which these trans women experience violence we usually see against women? Theyre attacked for being queer, they’re attacked for presenting feminine, they’re attacked for simply calling themselves women. Attacked all in very awful ways. By many conservative cis men, most of all.

Of course womanhood should not be defined by violence and that’s not what I’m trying to say, but I mean… when we’re talking about the trans community at large, aren’t there bigger problems surrounding it? Like the horrific conduct they have suffer from others? Why must one, in many TERFs’ cases, focus so much on their personal beliefs on how these people should interpret gender? Why can’t we set that aside, see these people r suffering on account of their claimed womanhood, and try and support them as we would other women? All in all in the larger world they suffer very similar things to women suffering under patriarchy in terms of violence, rights being stripped away in legislation, etc.

That’s the thing that’s always gotten me about TERFs. I appreciate radfem content overall, but when they start talking about trans people, I’m just like… for one, the concept of gnc stuff has existed for as long as humans have, and two, all it really does is further what in my opinion is a rlly vapid culture war that takes away from larger more in-life concerns.

*I don’t really know what you call yourself stance-wise, I’ve only taken a cursory glance at your profile, so I don’t know if you’d take the “gender critical” moniker, it’s just from what my limited knowledge suits what you’ve seemed to be advocating for so I’m using it as shorthand. Apologies if jumped the gun on any assumptions. I just wanna understand the “TERF” ideology more from someone who seems willing to discuss it without resorting to like… name-calling. Thanks so much for reading.

I appreciate the sentiments in your first paragraph, but I do want to stand up for a lot of women on here. I think women who speak directly, and speak towards uncomfortable truths, are seen as "frothing at the mouth" when really, if taken the time to read their words in a reasonable tone, many will see that they're being completely reasonable. That being said, I do try to be diplomatic and even keel in good faith questions, so that you for recognizing that. I love questions! I love to chat with women and make good efforts at fostering well-meaning discourse.

I'm going to answer this from my perspective only and what I think. I'm not going to argue for what I think other people should think wrt feminist theory or anything of that nature.

"When it comes to believing trans women r biologically men and therefore should not be referred to as women etc" I don't think I've ever said this or agreed with this. My sticking point is that biological sex is immutable in humans. I must stand up for scientific facts. When people argue that trans women are female, I will always say no. No, they are not. This is not only obscuring basic scientific facts, it's also putting people at risk for all sort of medical mumbo jumbo and grifters and bad agents. Removing your breasts or penis does not change your sex. Your sex is in every chromosome in your body. This is significant because while male and female human bodies have most things in common, they have very significant differences that impact health. Woman is a word that functions both for its literal meaning, and it's social meaning. "Trans women are women" is divisive because it lacks clarity, and can be used to silence and harm female people dealing with female problems. Personally, I have no interest in arguing with an individual in their normal everyday life about how they personal identify. That's not my jam. If I meet a trans woman and they say "I'm a woman" I think in my mind that in some ways, yeah arguably that can be true. She's adopted the artifice of womanhood (or at least some of them have), and so she lives in a manufactured liminal space of sorts between man and woman, as a lot of regular people are going to perceive it. Here are a couple of asks I've gotten that might help you understand better how I approach this topic: "why can't there be room for trans women in feminism?" [x] "What influences you to use she/her for Jazz?" [x]

This is all to just inform the rest of my answer. Trans women experiencing violence because they're trans women is different than women experiencing violence because they're women, specifically because these two groups do not share the same sex. That doesn't mean the act of violence can't be the same. Beating someone up is beating someone up. Murdering someone is murdering someone. Sexual assault is sexual assault. "Cis" men can sexually assault other "cis" men, and do. This is wrong, and they should experience repercussions under the law. It doesn't make the victim a woman. The victim is a man who experienced sexual assault from a man.

Trans women are at risk for reasons that are similar and different than "cis" women. Trans women, and other gender non-compliant people, are seen as a danger to the status quo, and threaten the identities of heterosexual men who depend on their homophobia to embolden their self-perceived position of power in the world. This goes for both actual straight men, and men who are determined to present straight when they might not be (the reasons which are incredibly varied). This comes into play when trans women experience violence. They are experiencing homophobic violence. I will agree, it is intersected with misogyny, but it is indirect misogyny. Homophobia and misogyny are symbiotic systems, because they exist (in large part) to uphold Heterosexism, which is a necessary component of Patriarchy. Gayness is a threat to the patriarchal rule, because Patriarchy demands that women are essentially sexless, exist to breed for men's purposes, and that men must continue their lineage by having children. If gay men exist, that's a big threat to the entire idea, and if gay women exist, that a really really big threat to the entire idea. These things intersect and relate to each other, but it doesn't mean they're equivocal. It's important to define what's the same, what's different, and why they're different. Again, this is my personal perception, and while informed by things I've read over the years, I do not have specific sources to quote right now.

"Of course womanhood should not be defined by violence" this is always interesting to me because I've heard this exact phrase before in other anons. I think this is a talking point in gender circles, because frankly I don't think anything defines womanhood except being a woman and I have no anxiety over defining womanhood by violence or not. Everything women do, think, and experience is part of womanhood, and it includes everything humans are capable of. The only commonality between women is that they are women, and specifically female. That's womanhood: you are specifically female and you experience misogyny. I just find this a thought ending cliche because...I don't know, if women experience violence because they're women, then yeah womanhood is defined by violence in some part. But who's fault is that? Men. Okay, so I'll be angry at men. That is the oppression, isn't it? How dare they make violence a part of our existence. I won't feel shame, I'll feel anger...and righteously so! So, I agree it shouldn't, but I also think it is because men make it so.

an excerpt | read the full thread by eliza mondegreen

Phobia indoctrination instills irrational fears in members of a high-control group and uses those fears to manipulate members so they won’t question the group’s beliefs or try to leave. Here’s what phobia indoctrination looks like in the trans community:

Telling community members that anyone who questions gender identity or transition (even if from a place of genuine care and concern) hates them, ‘denies their existence,’ or even wants them dead. 

Pushing community members, especially naive children/young people, to cut themselves off from friends & loved ones who may question or contradict the trans community, or may simply fail to follow elaborate and bizarre protocols trans communities lead young members to expect. 

Creating the false impression of a trans murder epidemic, which binds members to the trans community & increases their fear of the outside world out of all proportion to actual risk.

Inflating suicide risk & presenting transition as the only alternative to suicide when it comes to dealing with gender dysphoria. This increases desperation to transition, suppresses questions or doubts a person may have, & pushes patients to conceal other issues from doctors.

Vilifying and attacking detransitioners as traitors and existential threats to the community, thus demonstrating to current members of the trans community *exactly what will happen to them* if they step out of line or—god forbid—leave.

Teaching community members to bury their own questions and doubts by labeling any uncertainty about gender identity, transition, or community dynamics as manifestations of “internalized transphobia” that cause harm not just to the individual but to ALL TRANS PEOPLE.

This was probably my favorite thing I read yesterday thanks to the serendipity of what my friends share.

It is infuriating in so many ways, showing the misogyny in medicine, but it's also written in a delightful, funny way. Plus, it was truly educational, which I love. And I've studied these things pretty deeply.

Renee Stonebraker

Jul 02, 2026

"Adult women should not still be debating on what orgasms do or do not exist in the year 2026. In a time where science is trying to create artificial wombs, the fact that the bodies of over half the population are still considered medical mysteries has continued to disappoint me.

Unfortunately, I have to start with a horrific fact I stumbled upon.

If You’ve Had an Episiotomy, I Regret to Inform You

They’ve been cutting blind. I hate to go in dry, but there is no other way to break this news. The first complete 3D map of the nerves inside the clitoral glans, which, yes, extends down and around to where they like to slice women open during childbirth, was not completed until March of 2026. As in, about four months ago at the time of this publication. Yeah.

In March 2026, a team of researchers at Amsterdam University Medical Center published the first complete 3D map of the nerves inside the clitoral glans.[1] They used a synchrotron, a machine that generates X-rays ten trillion times stronger than a conventional CT scanner, to image donated female pelvises at a resolution of 0.001 millimeters.[2] The map corrected multiple errors in existing medical literature. It revealed that the main sensory nerve of the clitoris doesn’t taper as it reaches the glans as previously believed. Instead it branches like a tree throughout the glans and extends further into the clitoral hood than anyone had documented.[3] It confirmed that the clitoris contains over 10,000 nerve fibers, with a nerve density up to 15 times greater than the penis.[4]

That last figure had previously been estimated using data from a cow. From 1976.[4]