𝐦𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝓱𝓪𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻

‘  AMERICAN FRIES BREED AMERICAN THIGHS,  ’  he sings out just loud enough for his companion to hear among the hustle and bustle of valdez’s finest. it seemed a bit ridiculous to him, he’d been doing this job for as long as he could remember and still they’d saddled him with a babysitter; it spoke volumes to the paranoia of a leader he’d only spoken to in passing. seemed like a  s k e t c h y  way to run things but he got paid at the end of the day whether it all crashed and burned or not.  ‘  doc said my iron was a little low at my last physical.  ’  he shrugs.  ‘  let’s call it  ──  conditioning for if i ever fall into enemy hands. i’m just saving you the torture.  ’

HE’D ALWAYS FANCIED HIMSELF A KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR, well, when he was five or six maybe, a notion he’d grown out of as he added inch after inch to intimidating stature. blending in as best he could in a town full of criminals, the offer to help carry a dish or two had  s p i l l e d  from his lips along with the brew that had topped off his glass a few days prior and he’s regretting it the second his knock is answered.  ‘  don’t mention it,  ’  he breathes out on lilted tongue, slipping inside the door without waiting for invite and scrubbing his boots against the rug.  ‘  i’m just here for this, really.  ’  he snatches the jar of ale off the counter, twisting off the lid and taking a sip just to make sure it isn’t POISONED before his eyes widen at the spread laid out.  ‘  fucking hell, rachel ray, do you have an army coming to help you carry this shit or do you plan on turning me into a pack mule.  ’

THERE’S ONLY SO MUCH MINGLING SHE CAN HANDLE without something altering her perception to soldier on through and the last time she struck a match in the middle of town hall she hadn’t heard the end of it for days. too high to remember who had done the yelling but with NO DESIRE to have a repeat performance, iris slips away from yet another thrilling conversation to that red sign that screams her  s a l v a t i o n ; it was rapidly nearing that time when she dipped without so much as a goodbye as it was. no apology spills from her lips as she INVADES the camp so clearly set up by another and she only just manages not to smash the corner of the door into her one remaining heel, a miracle in itself.  ‘  i don’t,  ’  she pulls a sympathetic face out of her bag of tricks along with a lighter,  ‘  but i do have some weed, if that’s what you’re into. always helps drop it down to a lull for me.  ’

HER APPEARANCE HERE IS FLEETING, town gatherings had never really been her thing growing up, something about getting together and rubbing elbows with everyone she saw on a daily basis as it was seemed TEDIOUS. but as of late things had started to heat up again and it’s only a matter of time before someone else ends up with a mouth full of metal instead lasagna; not her, though, she’s far too  s l i p p e r y  a cockroach to catch a bullet. a valdez high beanie pulled from the very depths of her closet rest on top of her braids, screaming out her team spirit for all to see as she weaves among the crowd. her own contribution is laced with something that just might have everyone tripping a little too hard to pull a trigger; far better than the can of spaghetti-o’s she’d told madden to bring in her stead; this hadn’t been a planned stop on her itinerary for the day.  ‘  you should try the cupcakes,  ’  she purrs, swiping the tip of tongue through the icing smeared onto the top of one such cupcake,  ‘  i hear they’re to die for.  ’

HE’S SEEN A LOT OF THINGS, but never once in all of his travels has he seen such star-crossed enemies breaking bread over such simple fare. he’s seen opposing sides toast with a bottle of cristal, sure, but grandmother’s corn casserole seems a little random to pull everyone from the shadows  ── that is until he  d i g s  a plastic fork into the strange yellow dish on his plate. it’s life changing.   ‘  you’re getting fat and lazy, mate, been  t a i l i n g  you since you walked in.  ’   he stabs his fork into what remains on his plate when he claps his peer on the back before re-loading with more of the same.  ‘  no wonder they had to ship me in, you’re hopeless without me.  ──  this shit is TERRIBLE, by the way. don’t eat it. we can use it to kill them later on.  ’  words spoken around the next bite shoved into his waiting mouth.

IT HAD ALWAYS SEEMED SO TEDIOUS TO HER, getting dressed up only to get dressed down later, not that it had ever stopped her from being an utter slave to tradition. a barefoot contessa slumming it among the peasants  (  in her mind at least, with ego inflated by more drinks than feet she is tall  )  only  r e s t i n g  for a brief moment at the bar while she waits for the blessed timer in front of her to go off, alerting the bartender that her food was done. the ticking hands seem to move backwards the more she stares at them but that could just be a side-effect of her swimming vision and she’s almost RELIEVED when the chair adjacent is occupied.  ‘  personally i think they’re paired best with a trash can but maybe that’s just me,  ’  the words drip from her lips like honey; tacky and inescapable.  ‘  but if you’re looking to forget who you are and suddenly  g r o w  a personality my money would be on tequila.  ’  her gaze falls to the heels clutched in her grasp.  ‘  though something tells me you don’t need any more help making your clothes fall off.  ’

IT’S AS BEAUTIFUL A DAY AS ANY he’s had since touching down in what he can only consider the armpit of america; the sky is overcast and the birds  ...   well the birds had far more sense than any of the natives and had long flown south for the winter leaving easton to wonder if they’ll ever return  (  he wouldn’t but money talks  ). peace and quiet were about as common in valdez as law and order, a fact made ever more prominent by the SHRIEK coming from six strings and easton crosses himself that he’d only caught the tail end. it might be a bit suspect for him to creep away under the prominent gaze and he can’t afford to draw any attention to the bubbles  s n e a k i n g  their way to the surface of the lake just a few hundred feet off the shore so he lingers and plays devoted fan as well as he can; two fingers tap the inside of an open palm in what might be the only golfer’s clap this backwater town had ever seen.  ‘  heard enough. my ears are bleeding. my eyes are bleeding.  unfortunate  ──  that, i was just on my way to give blood and i think they’re going to have to turn me away now.  ’  a soft utterance about performance issues is cursed under his breath.

WONDER OVERTAKES THE OPERATIVE’S EXPRESSION and he gives the impression that he’s just as much icarus chasing after the sun as he is eve with the taste of forbidden fruit running down her chin in rivulets.  ‘  all out. i like it. but it leaves me wondering how you’re going to break through the glass ceiling for next year.  ’  he pauses, fingers folding a cheap paper place-mat in upon itself and  c r e a s i n g  the edges with the sharp of his nail over and over and over again.  ‘  are the stripes black or white ?  ’  the query is posed with a pair of narrowed eyes, it just might hold the utmost significance to him; their fledgling friendship very well could live and die by the next word’s out of madden’s mouth.