Book Review: I Hate Everyone But You
Iâve been sitting on this book and mulling over how I feel for a couple of days now. I loved the idea of the premise. As someone who has moved a lot, a story about dealing with those long distance friendships was a welcomed sight. And while this book did deal with that a bit, it also had things that werenât so welcomed.
First things first, this a modern-day epistolary book. The whole things is told via Ava and Genâs emails and texts. This makes for a quick read and generally works okay. You get the basic story and the general emotion of each girl. The emails and texts are sometimes a bit over the top, but thatâs to be expected. However, at the same time, I did wish for more details at times. I felt like I was missing something by not being in the moment. Iâm also hoping the final version will have dates and time stamps attached. It was really hard to gauge the passage of time between communication unless one of the girls drops a season/how long itâs been in one of their messages.
WARNING: MASSIVE SPOILERS AHEAD
There are a couple of things that made the book go south for me. One, is the relationship between Gen and her TA, Charlotte. One moment, Charlotte is simply helping her edit her piece for the paper. Innocent and appropriate enough, right? Well, you blink and theyâre suddenly lovers, in the loosest sense of the word. I can hear you saying, whatâs the big deal, theyâre both adults? Well, yes, but it still feels wrong. For one, Charlotte is in a position of power both as her TA and later as faculty advisor for the paper. Two, Charlotte is 32. Thatâs a huge difference, especially at that age. Three, Gen is not the only student she is sleeping with. There is at least one other girl, who Gen was also sleeping with, but it definitely sounded like it has been more. It just utterly and completely rubbed me the wrong way, especially when you throw in a transphobic storyline. Without telling the whole story, Charlotte is accused of writing transphobic pieces in the past, which ultimately leads to Gen quitting the newspaper, the whole reason she picked the college she did. If the Gen and Charlotte line had ended there, I would have chalked it up to being at college and experimenting. However, even after all that, Gen ditches Ava, who is visiting over Thanksgiving, to go have a weekend tryst with Charlotte. Considering how much of the book revolved around this pretty unhealthy relationship, I wanted to scream.
With Ava, it was her mental illness. Something about how it all was handled felt a bit off the entire book for me. Ava definitely had OCD, depression, and anxiety. I feel like there may be more going on, but if so, itâs not given a name. I have my own theories, though. The general portrayal is not my issues, but how past events are thrown in. For example, sheâs also a cutter. There is a slight edge of urgency to it, but itâs only mentioned a couple times and dropped completely once Gen tells her mom. Thereâs only this weird spot where itâs nonchalantly mentioned that Ava tried to kill her mom in 6th grade once. Itâs meant as a ploy to show how important it is for her to be on the right medication, but it still felt a bit odd. This, however, may go back to the epistolary-no-details issue I had above, but at times I felt like there was just a check list of all the things wrong with Ava mentally.
Iâve debated on if I wanted to mentioned this, but thought I would at least briefly. When Gen comes out, thereâs a lot of mislabeling on Avaâs part. Repeatedly, Ava calls her gay. Gen does correct her by saying she still likes boys and does bring up bisexuality, but Ava to a point still implies sheâs gay since Gen is mainly sleeping with women. It does seem to stop once Gen labels herself as queer, but it still irritated me a little. Especially when there was a whole passage about how could Gen fantasize about a man when she was gay! I know a lot of this is supposed to be that Ava is a poor sheltered girl (there are several other painful questions especially about trans stuff), but itâs a little unbelievable considering sheâs in modern day L.A. I donât expect her to be fully enlightened, but I would expect her to know more at her age.
In part, a lot of that may have to do that this book felt like Dunn and Raskin maybe took their own college experiences or YouTube stories and crammed them into this book, especially since they name/link dropped their own YouTube channel in the middle of the book. Â Honestly, Iâm not really sure I would consider this a teen book. Maybe more NA? I donât know the voices used just didnât feel too authentic to me. It felt a lot like 30 year olds pretending to be college students.
In the end, this book wasnât for me at all, but considering how many people are raving about it, this may be a âitâs not you, itâs meâ situation. Or maybe if I had been a fan of Dunn and Raskinâs in general, it may have had stronger appeal. Iâll be interesting to see if things shift once the book is out and more reviews are posted.








