Chris Redfield long schlong club

Chris

Chris has a list of items and groceries that need to be bought, and he will stick to his list. He’ll let you come with him to buy whatever you need for yourself, but he won’t have the patience to sit in a chair for an hour just to watch you try on one clothing item after the other.

Just let Chris get his own things while you do some shopping for yourself. It’ll save you both from an argument when you get home.

Chris isn’t the type to care much about what the house looks like, as long as it’s clean. So whatever furniture you like, he’ll let you have it. If you know what you want, he will come with you to go and buy it, but if you don’t, he’ll just drop you off at the store. You can call him when you’ve made a decision, so he can come and pick you and the new, possibly heavy, furniture up.

Chris doesn’t like shopping much, so he does a lot of it online. That means there will be a lot of boxes in the house most of the time, so you can always decide to mess with him and build a fort with the boxes, just to mess with him. It doesn’t annoy him, though. He’ll happily spend time in your little box fort with you, it’s an ideal place for Netflix and snacks.

Carlos

Carlos loves to go shopping with you, especially for clothing items. He cannot get enough of watching you exiting the changing room in yet another outfit he’s never seen you in. He will walk through clothing stores and pick out items he thinks will look lovely on you, and make you try them on. Even if at first you don’t like a specific clothing item, you always have to admit to yourself that it does look good on you. Carlos has an eye for that sort of thing.

When it comes to groceries, he hasn’t got a clue about what he needs and will spend a lot of time just wandering around the store, looking at things. He decides what he’s going to be cooking on the spot, and always ends up getting more food than the two of you would need. He will usually give any leftovers away to the homeless people who live down the street, so you sometimes wonder if he buys too much on purpose. It doesn’t really matter, you found yourself a good man.

Carlos will sometimes wander off while shopping because he’s forgotten something or got distracted by a sales bin. Eventually, this becomes annoying enough that you buy him a shirt that says ‘If found, please return to Y/N’. You, of course, own a shirt with your own name. Sadly for you, Carlos finds this whole shirt idea hilarious and will wander off on purpose in hopes of a stranger returning him to you.

Wesker

Wesker doesn’t have a lot of time on his hands, so he will force you to sit in the shopping cart to prevent you from getting distracted and wandering off. He knows exactly where everything he needs to buy is, and makes sure he takes the shortest route to the cash register.

Of course, if you need something, you’re free to get it. Just tell him in advance, because otherwise, you’ll have to listen to Wesker sighing for the rest of the day.