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Hello @staff I would like to make a formal complaint that my tumblr ads are no longer funny and nonsensical, but annoyingly frequent and boring. I demand you bring back the frog with a knife. I want to pour vinegar on bread.

Caretaker, might I ask how you're managing to outrun them and still be posting?

VOICE TO TEXT ALL TERRAIN HEELYS

high school is soo funny in hindsight. the entire time you're there thinking it's the most important period of your life and then the second you're out you're like well that was fucking stupid

I have never seen Islam shown so humanized, so relaxed, so innocent and pure. That’s brilliant and funny. 

This feels like the equivalent of the school girl running to class with toast in her mouth but prayer

You all deserve to know dude in the foreground is Jewish, and has done his own version of this with Chanukah where he's literally just. Running out the door reciting his prayers in Hebrew and it's wonderful

This is the Muslim/Jewish solidarity we need LMAO

hey kid. i know this lab is scary, but the punishment isn’t for you. i’ve got a guy coming in who likes ben shapiro. i know, right? anyway, all i need you to do is explain your gender identity to him in detail. don’t worry, he’ll be bound and gagged. you can leave once you’re done i just needed some help.

can I get internship credit for this?

“person working for jigsaw for internship credit” is such a fun premise.

Life hack to experience shrimp emotions

Ancient Athens

@memecucker

i hate star trek because every time theyre like “oh my god the skringles have broken the crankus treaty with the skronglies which mean the flongles are starving because they cant get binkbonk berries” and every time im like “oh my god they cant get binkbonk berries…”