a bit of a handful @bloomingonionbitch - Tumblr Blog

Autumn sun through my window

7.11.2022

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(had a big existential/passage of time/crying freak out on my way home from the city today and this is 100% how i looked at the border patrol checkpoint).

#despite going through the check multiple times a week my husband just told me i do not have to take off my sunglasses???#there's something about driving down I-25 that absolutely makes me go nuts #or maybe that's just what happens when you drive the same car you've been in since high school #you could never separate me from my emotional support 2009 Honda Fit #idk guys i am super tired #also does anyone want to tell me more about the internal fighting that's going on w/ the Archdiocese of Las Cruces???

(god bless my 2nd older brother. we don't do big catch-ups or anything, but we are in near-constant contact sharing pictures of Pokémon and vintage sports mascots/logos and corroborating super obscure childhood memories).

#like - i can just text him “Did your friend Jimmy have a Hot Wheels desktop computer with a matching landline????”#WHICH HE DID but it felt too indulgent and Flavortown in my memory #i called 911 on that landline at least twice 🤷‍♀️#i was in the 1st grade and they made me hang out with his sister who was an honest to god BABY what was i supposed to do????#but yeah shoutout to all the irish twins out there ✌#my oldest AND youngest brothers both have children and use PTO for Disney Cruises and I LOVE them and they're great but i cannot relate

violetvibrations

@ toastedbyeli

#!!!!!#you know what????#yeah

nobrashfestivity

Morris Hirshfield

#!!!!!

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(Béla Fleck is going to be in Santa Fe this September).

#nobody ever comes to New Mexico and it's fine i get it #like Rage Against the Machine canceled and rescheduled their show at NMSU twice and then it never was spoken of again #idk what the deal is - i like living here???#and i don't even live in one of the cool parts!!!#(obviously i intimately know why NM is ranked dead last in everything but also we're kind of left alone?)

(my beloved family friend and former teacher LOVES Taylor Swift and he thinks that I know a lot about her and intimately know songs post-2012 and i don't have the heart or time to correct him so i thank God for social media because i have absorbed so much Discourse™ and lyric analysis that i can meaningfully participate!)

#how many times did i watch that - sorta weird - clip of her explaining “kiss the mahogany grain” on a podcast?#too many #and like i get it #i taught English and she would have been a pleasure to have in class #but i'm not trying to talk about Taylor Swift with this guy #i wanna talk shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit #i would love to love Taylor Swift #(imagine that sung by Donna Summer please)#anyway #i literally didn't date in high school but really crammed it in during my 20s and got divorced and was with the weirdest menagerie of peopl #unless she has a song about her first love dying on her birthday idk what business i have trying to force it #no disrespect to Swifties for real for real for real #because you know what? i'm 5'10 and that something something sexy baby monster on a hill lyric is dead on #oh shit i just remembered this girl i was in Ed school with and she won a contest and had a sleepover or some shit with her????#and God bless her it was her whole personality #(this had to have been just before or after the Red era?)#is it obvious i'm on summer vacation and i'm restless and i took two big ass walks today???#if you went to Auburn between 2013-2018 please contact because i have some things to corroborate

(🕯🐢 please manifest that the bait shop in my town rehomes their tortoise to me 🐢🕯)

#i've lived here a little over a year and check on her every other week or so #she has NO heat source and is in such a small tank #i just walked in and said “name your price!!!!!!!!”#they took my number!#(it's the last day of school and i felt bold 🙃)

icaseybaybee

#!!!!!!!#last day of school babey!!

bloomingonionbitch

(i'm really not ready for Hacks to be over...)

bloomingonionbitch

(OH MY GOD).

#hacks spoilers #okay this viewing experience really bonded me and my husband #hearing Deborah say - “You're a big brave girl” really healed something in me #but also do i get to have a boomer friend or do i have to wait until Generation Omicron starts wearing baggy jeans and i'm old????#anyway #the barbra/judy duet was the perfect touch #i think every couple weeks about whoever does the music for this show #that fucking “Constant Craving” remix!?#“You're So Cool”?????#STEELY DAN COVER BY KING PRINCESS????#idk tomorrow is the last day of school

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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(okay also really quick - did you guys see the trailer for the Rob Pattinson fucking Chris Hansen movie??????)

#like 2005 and 2008 were big years for me - learned what a rhombus was in '05 and got proton radiation while listening to “Decode” in '08 #but i swear that i didn't hear SHIT about this movie until i opened an A24 email in the social studies hallway bathroom at 6:55 AM #like i'm gonna watch it #and it's obviously not even a close comparison but does this mean we'll eventually get a Glenn Howerton as Jeff Probst indie????#I JUST LOOKED IT UP AND THIS MOVIE IS SET TO COME OUT ON 9/11?????#(i know it's not a Chris Hansen biopic btw and it'll be very illuminating on contemporary issues and so on and so on)#(but The Chris Hansen™ Movie is just so much more efficient and evocative)

slopforhogs

Collared peccary (Dicotyles tajacu/Pecari tajacu) with leucism amongst a squadron of typical peccaries

Captured by Ramiro Gonzalez, CC BY-NC 4.0

(x)

#i get up so early to do things and i love going out front when it's still dark and cool and you can reaaaallllly smell the creosote #anyway #i pray i witness this someday #i know not to approach obviously (y'all think i HAVEN'T been to the Bosque del Apache or what????)#when you live in the desert it's always a 50/50 shot that you seem something super beautiful or something so so so scary when you go outside #like - is it going to be the biggest desert hare you've ever seen or a row of flattened quail chicks on your street????#(i made yard signs saying to drive with care to spare a quail + my in-laws say they're too small but MAYBE THEY'RE FOR THE QUAILS TO READ!!)

matagonia

The Windy Summit, woodblock print by William Setzer Rice (1873-1963) ca. 1925.

#!!!!!!!

(i'm really not ready for Hacks to be over...)

#you guys should have seen me when “Mad Men” ended #a mess!!!!#but that's what happens when you let Matthew Weiner wriggle into your ventricles #ugh i am so bummed #like i'm watching “Game of Thrones” for the first time but it's mostly because i'm horny for the Hound #i never watched it because i just gleaned all the main plot points from the Yahoo! homepage so i never felt the need #i'm sorry but Deborah yelling “THIS IS STOLEN LAND!” was perfection

kosmogrl

I know I’ll get through it because I’ve gotten through everything that’s happened to me so far

#you know what?#yeah #i have fucking crammed in so much in 31 years #like two of the some of the worsts things already happened #so? 🤷‍♀️

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

theodorafrompluto

Sleeping Joan of Arc (1895)

by George William Joy

#oh

(my PCP got mad at me because i declined to consent to ambient AI recording and my mom got mad at me because i don't want to fill my home with furniture for a baby that doesn't exist????)

#it's should be illegal for Boomer Women™ to be mean to me when there's two new episodes of “Hacks” to watch #ew can you see my mother wound????#“I'M NOT THE WOUND!!!!!”

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