Bloody Moron

LIBERTY 1618 E 6th St Austin, TX With a strong foundation in Zing Zang Bloody Mary Mix and Austin Beerworks Black Thunder, Liberty’s take on the classic is thick and hearty like the blood of our ancestors who fought for the freedom and liberty we so richly take for granted.

The Grackle 1700 E 6th St Austin, TX 
 As much character as the Dripping Springs Vodka, sriracha, pickled vegetables, and Murphy’s Stout give this Bloody Mary, the lime is somehow the star of the show. Not the best in town as the bartender claims, but it will certainly put a spring in your step in the summertime sizzle.

Takoba 
1411 E 7th St, 
Austin, TX 78702 
Not only is Takoba’s homemade mix actually their very own salsa puréed with clamato, Valentina hot sauce, and Worcestershire... their vodka is infused with tomatoes, garlic, black pepper, and jalapeños. The kick never stopped kicking.

Contigo 
2027 Anchor Ln, 
Austin, TX
No need for a flashy presentation here. Contigo’s Bloody Mary confidently sits back and lets its home smoked tomatoes do the talking.

Frank 407 Colorado Street Austin, TX Winner of the People’s Choice Award at The Mohawk’s 2014 Bloody Mary-Off, The Red Headed Stranger at Frank will charm any self respecting Willie fan…but only if they really really like bacon. Served in a Mason jar and garnished with olive, pepperoncini, and cheddar cheese, the heart of this stranger is churning with secrets. The tight-lipped bartenders hinted at a 27 ingredient mix and a heartily seasoned rim. And if the bacon strip standing in for the celery stick weren’t enough, prepare yourself for the bacon infused Tito’s vodka.

Having a knack for bringing Tom Waits’ daydreams to life, the minds behind Hillside Farmacy seem to have mastered the balance between stylistic and sensuous taste. Served in a classic Ball jar, their bloody mary’s chili powder/sea salt rim ignites the flavors of the tamari and healthy dose of garlic. But the secret weapon? Wasabi powder! An outstanding, sinus-clearing addition to an already enticing elixir.

Hopfields 3110 Guadalupe St. Austin, TX 78705 Necessity was the mother of invention here, as Hopfields skirted the issue of not serving liquor by replacing the vodka in their bloody mary with authentic Japanese sake. But for me, the real draw is cornichon pickle brine, which somehow represents the sharpness of a pickle with the clean crispness of its former cucumber self. Hopfields’ homemade secret mix plus paprika, a shot of lime juice, and meticulously  chopped horseradish gave it just enough kick without being downright painful. After the first sip, I knew this drink wouldn’t last long. 

The Russian House 307 E 5th St, Austin, TX Here in Austin’s own little chunk of the former USSR, the bloody mary is just one of the countless receipes holding true to the mother land. The garnish was a meal in itself: radish, black olive, bread, herring, pork, potato, green onion, and a crunchy homemade pickle. With heaping helpings of horseradish, authentic mustard, and a blend of spices the chefs were not willing to disclose, this bloody mary left my head spinning from the deliciousness, but my belly too bloated for borsht. 

A very hearty dose of lime juice, a chili salted rim, and the house vodka is none other than Tito’s Handmade. The El Chile Bloody Mary is a triple threat, people.

Nomad Bar 1213 Corona Dr, Austin, TX Uniquely seeved in a rocks glass with the standard garnishes, Nomad presents their garlic-heavy homemade mix with a sucker punch of sriracha.