sentence starters meme. feel free to change any pronouns/format to fit with characters better. taken from this video. may work better if adding “i’m [character name], [age], and…” to the beginning of these sentence starters, but it’s not necessary. a mix bag of nsfw, humour/crack, angsty, etc.
“i’m friends with a rich person.”
“i was in a relationship for eight years before tinder was a thing, so i have no idea how this tinder thing works.”
“the last time i was someone’s type, i was giving blood.”
“i’m 5′8″ but everyone’s the same height lying down.”
“i don’t have chlamydia.”
“i really love red lipstick.”
“i cried by myself the other night.”
“if i had to describe myself, i’d say that i’m quite a lot like a vindaloo.”
“i’d let you play snake on my nokia 3210.”
“you can be the bi- to my -cep.”
“my chain costs more than your house.”
“i let my friends borrow my expensive things.”
“my hands are quite rough, like the sex we’re going to have.”
“what’s the point of guys under 6′0″?”
“i have size eleven feet. read into that what you will.”
“my girlfriend said i had to tell you about her.”
[starts showering the other muse with money.]
“i once tried to wax my own asshole, and it got stuck together.”
“my favourite exercise is sex.”
“if you say yes, you’re going to be the better-looking person in the relationship, and, also, please?”
“my dad went to the shops and never came back.”
“i may have a minor drug problem.”
“i’m not very good at social situations.”
“my clothes always have to match.”
“i think we’ll get along really well as long as you don’t mind big penises.”
“i’ve lost four-hundred pounds on online poker.”
“i’m here to keep you on the black side.”
“i’m not the funniest, i’m not the most clever, i’m not the richest.”
“you look like you could ruin my life.”
“i get my asshole fingered sometimes.”
“i can get rid of all your debt.”
“when i was younger, i had an undiscovered wheat allergy, which gave me crippling constipation.”
“your bone structure is giving my bone structure.”
“if you like your sexual encounters to be under two minutes, i’m your guy.”
“i was born with a six pack.”
“i’m just happy to be here.”
“you can call me tonight.”
“if you want an ugly boyfriend, there’s one behind me.”
“i don’t use toilet paper, i just go in the shower and use my hand.”
“i didn’t get many gcses, but you can get my d.”
“i play the drums, the piano, and the violin.”
“i got bullied in school, but i deserved it.”
“if i had to describe my personality, i wouldn’t but i’m rich.”
“i’m a thief, and i’m here to take your virginity.”
“i like watching plane crash documentaries.”
“if i was a felony, then you’d be on death row.”
“i’ve kidnapped your family.”
“my girlfriend said she was open into letting someone join in.”
“i’ve got a fast car and i like to rev it. you might think i have a tiny willy, but would you like to find out?”
“i’d like to take you to see the northern lights.”
“can i tie your shoelaces? ‘cause i don’t want you falling for anyone else.”
“i can take you anywhere in the world, first class.”
“you’d look great in my arms.”
“are you from china? because i’m china get into your pants.”
“i can improvise your favourite song on the piano.”
“i’ve shat myself multiple times.”
[just stares quietly and says nothing.]
“my love for you is larger than my forehead.”
“i can speak three languages and play two instruments.”
“sometimes when i’m sad, i drink alone.”
“if i was a tree, i’d be a good tree.”
“is your dad a terrorist? because you’re the bomb.”
“i’m just a nice guy who won’t let you down.”
