Blade-Liger-4ever

What. The. FRAG, Hasbro?!

Within the past year, it has come to my attention that Hasbro and Paramount are collaborating on a new Transformers series, this one dubiously dubbed Transformers: EarthSpark. While most of my friends - and perhaps even my followers - on this site are aware that I’m a huge fan of the franchise, I have actually lost severe interest in the more recent adaptations for the Transformers. The reason for this, as discussed here, is that Hasbro themselves have taken to hiring non-union voice actors for the productions.

Why is this a problem, you might ask? The problem resides in that two of these men in particular, Peter Cullen and Frank Welker, who are not only the sole reason the Transformers franchise has survived the past almost forty decades, are still INVESTED in their characters. They continue to appear at conventions, they still do the voices for their characters, and have repeatedly expressed a desire to continue to play Optimus Prime and Megatron respectively.

But Hasbro, in their obscene greed, vanity, and hubris, have thrown dirt in their faces for almost five years by hiring low-level talent from up in New York. These people, whom the shallow company has procured for the last two abominable animated projects that somehow passed as television shows, are outside the Screen Actors Guild, which means they are free to pick up any work for a low price, often at half the talent of the SAG voice actors. By seeking these people out, Hasbro is telling Mr. Cullen and Mr. Welker that they’re not worth the paycheck and are easily replaced, not to mention insulting their acting abilities.

But that’s not the problem for EarthSpark. Below is a link to the Wikipedia article for this travesty of media entertainment:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transformers:_EarthSpark

If you stuck around long enough to read that page, you may have noticed some familiar names. That’s because these people are actually from the SAG. By selecting this group of people, Hasbro’s Freudian Excuse to “save money” falls completely flat on its repugnant face because these actors are as expensive as any other name in Hollywood. And if they have the gall to use the above financial defense, then how in the Pits of Kaon are they able to afford Sandor “the Hound” Clegane from Game of Thrones fame, and not longtime VA Frank Welker for the Leader of the Decepticons himself?

Hasbro has pulled a lot of BS the past few years. Heck, they were even doing it when the original Transformers film came out in 1987 when they first killed Optimus, as it was never in the original script.

But this? This is an entirely new level of underhandedness. It’s cheap, it’s dirty, it’s despicable, and downright disrespectful. It’s disrespectful to Peter Cullen and Frank Welker; it’s disrespectful to Mr. Cullen’s late elder brother Larry, who inspired Optimus’ voice; it’s disrespectful to the characters, lore, and history; and more to the point, it’s disrespectful to me and every other fan of the Transformers. Because by telling Mr. Cullen and Mr. Welker that they’re old news and unimportant, they’re telling me and everyone in the fandom that we don’t matter, and that we must move on for “progress”.

Well, Hasbro, you conniving creature that would make a fox turn its nose up in disgust, I’m telling you that you’re a bunch of selfish, greedy backstabbers who have lost any lingering support that I might have had for your treacherous company. I am done with your ideas for Transformers, G.I. Joe, and all of your other properties, because you are denying me and the men who have given me nothing but joy for years the remaining opportunities to tell more stories with the characters. And considering that you still haven’t given Mr. Cullen a standalone Optimus film, which, in his own words, “...[I] want to do before I’m [Peter Cullen] gone”, I will most certainly not be supporting you. Because we all know that neither him nor Mr. Welker is getting any younger, as much as it pains me to say it, and by taking these chances away from two wonderful men who are so kind to their fans, you are showing just how detestable you really are.

As you know, every now and then I get dragged back into Transformers Universe for a while after seeing others post/talk about it. This usually compels me to watch a gameplay or some videos (or fall into a rabbit hole), my personal favorite is Sooo Mungry’s Autobot/Decepticon tour where he shows all of the characters bios and voicelines.

Usually, I just read their bios and listen to their voice lines as background noise (while trying to think of a VA for them, just for fun). Though, now I’ve decided to focus on the Playstyleand Warrior Balance(consisting of Offensive, Defensive, and Utility, ranked via an “/10” scale)…and I found something that PLEASANTLY shocked me.

Before you watch the video (or just put it at 2x speed tbh), guess which TFU Autobot has the strongest Offensive/Offense? Here’s the video.

Not gonna lie, but I genuinely thought that bots like Front–Line, Monsoon, Showdown, or Ripraw would score higher in the Offensive category (for obvious reasons). But surprisingly, they score (in order): 6, 5, 4, and 5. No shade to him, but I thought Showdown would’ve scored higher.

Though, we do need to consider their “Classes”. According to TFU’s Class Guide, Front–Line’s a Supressor, Showdown’s a Guardian while Monsoon and Ripraw are Soldier class. Each class has their own explanations (and are pretty in–character for a lot of the cast, like Showdown as a Guardian just fits) for why certain characters have certain stats. While I don’t agree with some stats (the fact that Triage only has 2/10 Offensive is CRIMINAL. Methinks he should be higher), the rest are pretty reasonable.

But with that being said, if those 4 aren’t the ones with the highest Offensive/Offense…then WHO is?

So, the Autobot with the highest Offensive/Offense stat…IS NONE OTHER THAN SWAGGER HIMSELF, AKA THE TWO–WHEELER SAMURAI, WITH A WHOPPING 8/10.

If you listen closely, you can hear the EXACT moment my JAW DROPPED TO THE FLOOR.

Though, I think it’s important to note that Offensive ≠ Physical Strength (because if that were the case, those 4 I mentioned earlier would’ve ranked WAY higher), but more so Offensive = DPS (Damage Per Second AKA Damage Dealers). But that ASIDE, TFU/Jagex seems to support the idea of Swagger as a strong DPS. According to the article/news, apparently, THOUSANDS of TFU players were told to vote for a DPS for the Autobot team…and SWAGGER was SELECTED.

In short? This guy is CRAZY STRONG AND IS 100% READY TO TAKE ON THE DECEPTICONS. Makes you wonder the kind of training regimen Drift subjected him under…*shivers*.

But honesty, it checks out. The ‘cons were responsible for his father’s death and his Master’s abandonment of him sudden disappearance. They’ve taken away the TWO bots that are important to him. NO WAY Swagger wouldlet them off easy. While he tries his hardest to obscure his anger by keeping up his cockiness/arrogance, sometimes, the “mask” slips when some battles against the ‘cons get “heated”. As a result, Swagger would get borderline aggressive in such cases.

Though, there’s a downside. Despite having the highest Offensive/Offense among the Autobots…Swagger has, unfortunately, the LOWEST Defensive/Defense at just *checks notes*…1/10.

Yikes.

((Note: An interesting tidbit I found is that Swagger’s Offensive and Defensive stats are nearly the complete opposite of Meltdown’s. So, Meltdown’s Offensive is 1/10…while his Defensive stats are NEARLY MAXED OUT AT 9/10.

The mental imagery of Swagger being frustrated at Meltdown for closing his optics whenever he shoots his missiles/beam gun at a ‘con (thereby missing at times), and Meltdown having spark attacks 24/7 whenever Swagger’s deployed in battle (because the kid has ZERO DEFENSES), is pretty funny, heh.

Another interesting tidbit is that, on the Decepticons’ side, Swagger shares a similar Offensive and Defensive stats with Duststorm. Her Offensive is at 7/10, the highest of the Leviathan crew, while her Defensive also sits at 1/10, the lowest of the crew. And here’s the kicker; both Duststorm and Swagger are both from the Interceptor class, AKA “highly–destructive” bots. Yeah, their Offensive stats make much more sense now. I know we rarely touch on them, but seeing them clash would be pretty interesting…))

But all jokes aside, the two contrasts between his Offensive and Defensive suits him scarily well imho. Swagger may not be the physically strongest of the Arclight crew, but he CAN dish out a LOT OF DAMAGE (courtesy of his martial prowess and weaponry), if need be. But at the same time, he needs to be careful.

There’s a general HC/observation floating around that Two–Wheelers are, for lack of a better word, “glass cannons”. For reference, look no further than the many times Arcee got one–shotted and KO’d by hits/attacks, with her also needing longer time to recover. Bottom line is that smaller/lighter frames are more vulnerable to attacks

That aside, I do recall seeing Swagger being referred as a “glass cannon” in some forums (and his playstyle…also reflects that tbh). He’s NOT weak (in fact, I HC him to have a scarily high pain tolerance), it’s just that… his frame isn’t as sturdy as the other non–Two–Wheeler crewmates, is all.

But he’s not backing down without a fight! He could handle getting injured, really!

Triage, kneeling down: What happened?

Swagger, slurring a bit with a gash on his side: ‘s no biggie. Fought her off.

Macro, serious: Diabla’s Venom Arm Blades happened. That’s what.

Triage: …”No biggie” my AFT! Help me carry him to the Medbay! NOW!!!

On a more serious note, while we know how Swagger’s now living out of sheer spite and that he’s holding on to everything and everyone he has right now with a death grip…I think that some of his extreme gung–ho nature can be attributed him having the Bushido code ingrained within him stemming from Drift’s tutelage (specifically the “fight to the end” belief/mentality). But as we’ve also talked about, Swagger’s the kind of Samurai that follows his own code after his Master’s departure. In this case, he will meet any challenges head on (even if it means putting down his life in the process)…but at the same time, he wants to keep going. To be there when Drift returns and to stand with the Arclight crew.

(While his intentions are noble and honorable…you best believe that Doubletake, Limelight, and Showdown are all keeping an eye on him. Heck, in a display of Two–Wheeler solidarity, Cameo and Wildcard might also be in on it. Swagger might grumble and complain a bit from their focus…but deep down, he appreciates their care and concern. But good luck making him admit that).

Hope you don't mind my Swagger-centric ramblings, Blade! Because really, the more info I find about him, the more I grow to respect him (and that I thank Jagex for creating a VERY interesting character). You could tell they put a LOT of thought into him, even if the evidence isn’t as obvious, but that’s what makes connecting–the–dots all the more fun, hehe.   

But anyways, that’s all from me, Blade! Thank you very much for reading, and I look forward to your thoughts! Happy weekend!

Hi Jazzi! It's going well so far, thank you. I hope yours is treating you well too!

Nice. I should look more into the footage, too - and you know what, I think I'll make a fan-cast post for the crews some time. I might even link videos to the names as a general voice ref for how I envision them myself.

Neat! I definitely need to go back and watch their promo/gameplay vids myself. It's fun!

This all fits most of the crew (though I'm biased in thinking Monsoon should be in the Medic class thanks to his bio - though Demolisher might also fit), but if anything I feel Triage should be in the Hybrid or Demolisher class. The man is too feral and unhinged for simply the Medic class, imo.

.....holy shoot kid, you don't mess around!

Though that really makes sense. Between his musculature, hard life, and general disposition, Swagger is going to gear himself toward dishing out heavy damage to his opponents. Not to mention, if you stop and think about it, Two-Wheelers are naturally small and light, so they'd either have to fight from a distance constantly or specialize in dealing out speedruns of death.

Oh yeah! But DPS/Damage Dealers makes sense for the likes of Swagger; it's not quite like the paladin class I hear of in D&D, but the Guardian class is the Transformers: Universe equivalent of the paladin because they're both tanks. And as we can see here, Swagger can deal damage but can't take it himself (1/10 defense, ouch.)

Woo! Atta boy Swagger! You made the cut my guy!

But yeah, the training (and diet probably) from Drift definitely was intense for Swagger to eventually be able to deliver such brutal attacks to the Decepticons. They'd better watch out when he's on the field, even if he isn't a physical powerhouse like Showdown. If a battle ever got heated and fury guided Swagger (while not blinding him *cough*Arcee*cough*), then there's likely both gonna be dead bodies and a few critical injuries on our boy.

(Oh. Now that makes Meltdown a bit more interesting - I'm a little tired of conscientious objectors in fiction, but now that you point that out, that's hilarious! XD

Oh wow. So not only are the Interceptors what Universe calls their Glass Cannons, but Swagger and Duststorm are the only ones in the game who qualify for the trope. Now that'd be an interesting 1v1...)

It is indeed a perfect contrast, especially with his personality in mind. Swagger's an aggressive combatant who specializes in heavy damage, but at the cost of defense. He definitely needs to be buddied up with with likes of Showdown in a battle.

(Ngl, I thought he did a burnout on her for a few seconds after this scene.)

Yeah that should have been instant death.

.....Why didn't she move -? Oh right, it's Miss Attack On Sight *rolls eyes*

Yep, accurate depiction of a Glass Cannon getting lasered.

I have many concerns about both Arcee's inability to MOVE when an unstoppable force is heading her way as well as how often the writers made it a point of her getting her teeth kicked in.

Okay, THAT'S funny!

But yes, the Glass Cannon can deal out pain, but can't take it themselves. As evidenced too by the ease with which you can ragebait Arcee

Oh by no means is Swagger weak. He's just not physically the strongest/most durable. His pain tolerance however, that's another matter (of Spark attack for Meltdown and yelling matches between him and Triage).

Doubletake: Henceforth, we're taking rotations on who gets partnered up with Swagger during a battle. Literally anyone just stick by him like Terran superglue until the battle's over.

*everyone nods as Triage growls over Swagger as he repairs him*

Yeah, despite his death grip on what little he has left, despite Swagger holding on out of sheer spite against the universe, a lot of it is the Bushido code Drift imparted to him. Fighting until the end was likely always his sort of thing, but it got dialed up a notch when he began his training, and then Drift's disappearance made him go a little overboard. But he has real friends now - a real chance at being reunited with Drift. So he'll keep fighting to the end, but he still wants to be around to see his mentor again.

(Oh yes, they're all keeping an eye on him! Swagger's still their friend/teammate, they're gonna make sure he doesn't go dying on them. Cameo and Wildcard would absolutely help out in that, and though Swagger complains about it, he oddly never pushes them away from their self-appointed duty. So far though, no one has gotten him to admit that he appreciates their care.)

I don't mind at all, Jazzi! I just hope I answered your ask properly - I know I didn't answer in proper order. Swagger is such a fun character, and you gotta love how Jagex put so much thought and effort into him (as well as the others, of course.) Indeed, being able to connect the dots makes the trips to Transformers: Universe all the more fun!

You're welcome, and I hope I satisfied with my answers! Who knows, maybe I'll manage to make some observations of my own soon!