Sacred and Profane

To be totally fair to Willy Wonka, at least a couple of those candy factory casualties involved kids deliberately circumventing reasonable safeguards, sometimes aided and abetted by the parents who were supposed to be supervising them. What happened is at most 60% his fault.

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

revealing your scaring the hoes type interests early on in a relationship is a good way to secure only hoes of bravery and fortitude that will craft horrible dreams and beautiful nightmares with you

One of the funniest things about Mormonism is that I’m sure Joseph Smith never believed any of the bullshit he said. There are some religions and cults where you have faith the original prophet actually thought they were talking to angels or believed the set of principles they laid out for their followers were for the greater good. Joseph Smith was a dumbass but like PT Barnum he realized a sucker was born every day and he was one step above the average 1830s sucker. He went from making people pay him to look at a rock in a top hat and ‘locate buried treasure’ to receiving lost bits of scripture, through the rock and top hat method. His wife caught him cheating and he said an angel visited him and told him men should be allowed multiple wives and not obeying that would send her to hell. I’m fairly convinced that dude was an atheist. He was on that hustler grindset. Brigham Young might have actually believed some of the shit he said but I don’t think Joseph Smith genuinely had faith in Mormonism or gave a fuck about humanity in the slightest.

Claiming that your witch coven is from the lost colony of Roanoke is never not going to be funny to me

This is a new one, please give me more details.

Oscar Tusk, one of the Troy Books authors 🫠 I had to use internet archive to verify the Roanoke claim, as he's conveniently deleted his website since then

Nope, nope, nope. The more I read, the worse it all sounds.

Troy Books authors please be fucking normal challenge (impossible)

Claiming that your witch coven is from the lost colony of Roanoke is never not going to be funny to me

This is a new one, please give me more details.

Oscar Tusk, one of the Troy Books authors 🫠 I had to use internet archive to verify the Roanoke claim, as he's conveniently deleted his website since then

Nope, nope, nope. The more I read, the worse it all sounds.

Claiming that your witch coven is from the lost colony of Roanoke is never not going to be funny to me

This is a new one, please give me more details.

Oscar Tusk, one of the Troy Books authors 🫠 I had to use internet archive to verify the Roanoke claim, as he's conveniently deleted his website since then

You can build an entire cosmology from the wreckage left by storms; from earthquakes and volcanoes, from falling stars, from the scarring of frost and fire. The stories of gods are buried within our own natural histories.