Say whatever you want about the man. He had drip.
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@biggestfailure14
Say whatever you want about the man. He had drip.

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history | historical women | asia
FATIMA // POLITICIAN
“She was a senior office holder in the Mongol Empire and a Shia Muslim. She went from slave to the most important politician in the Mongol Empire. After helping Toregene Khatun get her son Guyuk as Khan, she was executed on accusations of witchcraft by having all orifices sewn shut, wrapped in a blanket and thrown in a river. She was a close friend of Toregene, who she shared intimate confidences with, and always had access to her tent.”
Fun fact: by just using imaginary numbers, some Evil Math, and 101 rotating vectors You Can Create a shitty approximation of a fish.
two points of view on math fish
it isn't good art unless it's itself enough to get haters, so
win
it isn’t good art
unless it’s itself enough
to get haters, so
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
a witch's life in mongol is not about genghis khans sons its about their wives and their respective political agendas and the girl that takes turns playing evil scheming advisor to all of them in an attempt to singlehandedly tear down the mongol empire
I suggest everyone to read this manga: it's well-written and well-researched and it's about an interesting historical figure, Fatima, who managed to become a minister under Toregene Khatun despite being a prisoner of war and a woman in 13th century Asia.
Consiglio a tutti di leggere questo manga: è scritto bene e basato su ricerche approfondite ed è incentrato su un'interessante figura storica, Fatima, che riuscì a diventare ministro sotto Toregene Khatun nonostante fosse una prigioniera di guerra e una donna nell'Asia del XIII secolo.

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I can never stop thinking about -
Alastor, femme-fataling his heart out: Oh no! I've been defeated by SUCH a strong man, I have NO CHOICE but to put myself in your mercy! Where you could do anything you want to poor little old me! Oh! (pretends to faint)
Vox: I can do anything I want???
Alastor, making sure his tits are out: Oh, yes! How could I ever stop you? (bats eyes)
Vox: We're going on a smoothie date.
Alastor: Wai-wait, what?
Vox, vibrating with excitement: SMOOTHIE. DATE.
too bad Vox didn't do his offer during rutting season tbh 😔
Vox opens up alternate realities and finds one where he and Alastor are together/partners and is like "HOW THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT?!?" and other Vox is like "???did you not look up when deer sinners would be their horniest before asking?"
Canon Vox: What. What???! Alastor isn't, no, he doesn't care about that-
Other Vox: He does when you're half dressed and your chest is almost entirely exposed.
Canon Vox: WHAT!??!
Other Vox: He also likes it when you get on your knees and look up at him.
Canon Vox: Y-y-YOU D-D-DID WHA-WHAT?!?
Other Vox: He REALLY likes it if you stick your ass out when you lean over near him.
Canon Vox: (smoking from his screen, glitching like mad)
Other Vox: Yeah, those tentacles of his can really do anything you want, if you catch my drift ~
Canon Vox: (blue screen of death)
(this is not judging anyone's preferences btw)
cannibalstatic 👎: Alastor isn't powerful enough to deny whatever Vox wants with him, goes too far into dubcon/noncon territory for me, makes me highly uncomfortable
radiocult 👍: Vox is still somehow the freak in this scenario, begging this immortal 7ft demon to fuck him while Alastor tries to manipulate literally anything ELSE from this freak of a human, rdst extreme comedy edition
Very funny to think of Velvette, as an observer of the bullshit that is the VoxVal relationship and be like "the dick CANNOT be that good surely Vox could find someone less. Like That."
And then she properly meets Alastor, someone ELSE Vox is obsessed with, during the events of S2 and is like "Oh. My. God. He's with Val for his PERSONALITY."
Imagine writing porn about something bizarre and horrible happening to your favourite character in full confidence that it's a crack scenario that would never happen in the source material, and then it happens exactly like that and you just have to live with the knowledge that your boner is better at media analysis than you are.

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the funniest and most tragic moment in steven universe is the scene that implies that Pearl pulls bitches like a professional dog walker but doesn't know how phones work so her place on earth is being a life-changing futch fling for every dyke on the east coast there's probably a gay bar in maryland where they talk about the twiggy bird chick that eats milf pussy like it's the last edible thing on earth and they dont even know about the city full of thousand year old neon lesbian amazons who are pent up 24/7 from The War and leaving room for jesus cause they're always hanging out with their softboy nephew who might be the second coming of christ
[ID: Tumblr tags reading, "every 6 months or so a random poster gets possessed by those demons that gives you clairvoyance at the cost of ur sanity to pull a string of words to describe pearl steven universe in the most unhinged way possible" /End ID]
Or full sleep, I was so worried I would luckily I didn't, I forgot everything for like 1 minute i was like '...what happened?"
And then I remberred 💀💀
this is what happened right
Part of a set of pin designs I was faffing with a while back. Not sure if I'll do anything with it, but here's some cute lads for you anyways...

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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