Superb You Funky Little Hobbit

THE LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY

“I wish it need not have happened in my time,“ said Frodo. “So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

boromir, overhearing this: aw thanks guys!

m&p: …..

merry: Literally didn’t ask

“he could sleep, if sleep it could be called by Men, resting his mind in the strange paths of Elvish dreams, even as he walked open-eyed in the light of this world.”

I therefore suggest the following hypotheses:

1. Elves can sleep one half of their brains at a time, like marine mammals. They therefore seem to be half-asleep but can continue to do habitual tasks (in dolphins, for instance, continuing to swim and to go to the surface periodically to breathe).

2. Not being familiar with marine mammal behavior while sleeping, I posit that elves that are chasing prey (like Legolas chasing the Uruk-Hai in the passage above) will unconsciously follow the one member of their party that is taking their turn at being awake and consciously tracking their quarry. They might walk as in a hypnotic trance. This could lead to absolutely hilarious shenanigans.

3. Elves are therefore the most fearsome pursuit predators in nature, because even humans have to sleep SOMETIME.

Thorin’s entire company in the background: 😎👌…😳🕶️👌

what gollum meant: ur ugly and stupid

what sam heard: you’re a hottie but you’re dumb as shit

sam:

Six hours later Gollum is still muttering about how we is NOT hitting any hobbitses. Have not hit ANY hobbitses since master is ordering us not to. Fat hobbit LIES.

or that smeagol forgot the societal standards of beauty of his birth culture and they were overwritten by, idk, elf shit or something

thank you to @partywithponies for the alignment chart. 

I’m pretty sure Grima would answer “what makes you think I know??” and then start crying. 

and i’ll tell you who i would:

get drunk with

make out with

date

marry