bitchrome

Because yes, on the one hand conceptualizing countries/nations/States as singular human individuals is problematic for a number of obvious reasons, and the exclusion of non-European/Imperial countries is absolutely an expression of cultural darwinism and flat-out racism on the author's part as much as I'm concerned, but we also can't pretend like the idea of Nation, with clean-cut borders and flags and anthems, isn't specifically European. To me, and in a contorted way, this exclusion is less problematic than trying to force a specific mindset on cultures that don't necessarily see things this way, or had this mindset imposed.

Pre-French Revolution European States (and modern dictatorships) do tend to nullify the subjects as people, and identify the State in a single individual (the monarch, the Pope, the dictator) or a strict elite. So the nations-as-characters idea, especially of Imperial European countries and their immediate colonies in the eras early-Hetalia was about, works in a way, because the States were doing their own self-personification work.

But on the other hand, and I didn't have the tools to understand this when I was really into Hetalia as a tween/teen, Hetalia is the exact kind of story that can only be written at times when concepts like "peace" and "nation" are taken for granted. To my knowledge the most recent chapters, released in... today's political climate, are set in AUs and it's the closest the characters have ever been to just being bona fide OCs the author can put in silly dresses, which could mean nothing.

And it's also the kind of story you write when you believe nations to be the ultimate form of government and cultural expression of a people, which is interesting because once you look at Hetalia from the POV of this NOT being the case, you really start to notice stuff.

The idea of human-nations having a childhood is funny because it's implied that the child-form is a unfulfilled transitory state, it's the promise of a fully-fledged, final form that is more similar to / exactly the same as the countries we have today (or those we had in the 2010's). One particularly funny consequence of this idea is that the question "HRE=Germany?" is answered the moment it is formed, because if Germany wasn't HRE in any way shape or form, there wouldn't be any point to HRE being a child in the first place (or "dying" as one: if HRE had ran his natural course he would have simply died an adult or old man like the Roman Empire, who is understood as as having been a fully-fledged country-person who "died" of old age pretty much).

Speaking of which, Italy and Germany being the faces of the francise is particularly funny because they're REALLY bad examples of cohesive cultures cleanly transitioning into a singular national identity. Like comically bad. Hence why the author needs support characters like Prussia who also represents East Germany and is a catch-all for post-HRE/pre-Germany States, and Romano who represents Southern Italy, liberated/anti-fascist Italy, the Spanish colonies and/or part of the Papal States depending on what the author needs at any given time.

The show says love takes time and that it doesn't believe in predestination, yet Garnet's first fusion in "The answer" is perfect, because Ruby and Sapphire have a healthy relationship, even if they don't know it yet.

The show says we can be whoever we are, yet...

"Just redeem the intergalactic tyrants" doesn't even begin to cover how the Rose/Pink reveal breaks the show. In the version of the story we're promised at the start, Rose Quartz, a random soldier gem, is able to understand the beauty of life and decide to fight for it, because of her own free will. The revolution starts from the bottom up.

In the story we get instead, the "revolution" starts from the top down, which is problematic but may work, but I have issues the moment the writers introduce the concept that a Diamond's direct orders can't physically be disobeyed by her followers.

Pink tells Garnet to stop asking questions, and she does because she has to. We're told Pearl is the master of herself, and yet she cannot talk about Pink even after she's moved on from her love. Both were never acting out of respect, they didn't choose to act that way. They have no agency in the end, no matter what the show says.

White Diamond has the completely broken power of total, unavoidable mind control with no drawbacks, and the finale of the show is BUILT on the fact that she just has to decide not to use it ever again. Getting her to change her mind now and for all eternity isn't just a writing choice because Steven is so sweet and kind, it's the only way to give the good guys a chance at winning in the end (even shattering is out of the question if she can just control you and make you not do it). And after she does change, there are going to be gems on colonized planets who one day will receive the message from the Diamonds "oh btw we're not colonizing anymore, just do whatever you want from now on!" and they'll just obey as they always have, without having heard of the revolution even once.

Modern dictatorships do have the aspect of identification in the dictator even in the real world. But the power of the Diamond Authority in SU isn't a social construct and it is not arbitrary. It's real, it's literal. In this show, entities better and more powerful than the rest do exist, and those who aren't keep their head down and follow, because they can't help it. As extensions of their leaders, they have no free will or minds of their own.

The revolution physically couldn't have happened if someone above the rules, someone who knows better (a dictator, an elite, a goddess) hadn't arbitrarily decided to start it.

I'm liking it so far, but I'm on the second to last episode and. AGATHA, GIRL, WTF ARE YOU DOING???? And Lord Ledger too. I'm absolutely flabbergasted. Why did they go there. I hoped they were going for a fakeout, I thought we had a sex-repulsed queen on our hands... though I now realize making her be sex-repulsed, considering her past, in what is essentially "porn for women, the series" (affectionate) could easily have been disappointing. Oh, and for what it's worth, I really liked the position shift and its implication.

- How they treat Spyder like some sort of sick dog during the first twenty minutes ("sorry children. puppy has to go live with the other dogs. Don't be like that it's already been decided" "but daaaad!" "alright alright we'll bring him there together. It'll be an adventure!" bruhv)

- the fact that the fire people are only there to justify the title of the movie and are otherwise completely irrelevant and unrelated to anything going on at any point

- the human guy who shows up when Jake needs to be broken out of jail and disappears the MOMENT Jake is out

- The squelching sound they play when Jake stabs the air next to Spyder's head (I was FULLY convinced the camera was going to pan over a random coconut or something)

- the giant death spiral (which I'm still convinced should have been a bigger deal) in which everything that enters it goes up (where to?) EXCEPT people (who still go down when they fall)

- Spyder whacking the Hamburger off the table

Imagine saying "yeah I had my car fixed by a guy I know" and 2000 years from now someone takes this to mean that "guy" doesn't just mean generic male... in certain contexts, it can mean "he who fixes cars"!

Slave isn't a secret, elite-knowledge translation for puella. Puella just means girl, and enough girls were slaves that when someone said stuff like "I had the girl scrub the floors yesterday" other people could contextually understand they were talking about a slave, instead of a daughter or their wife.

Yeah seers and magicians were considered sketchy for the most part (no more than how we believe fortune tellers are frauds today). I still think the accepting of "deceiver" as a possible translation though the comparison with Loki (especially when Hermes/Mercury is right there!) is mental gymnastics, though.

JKR probably read "magic systems need rules" once and misinterpreted it, in the worst possible way imaginable.

There's a specific spell or potion for every little thing, and they are all neatly catalogued in books and recorded by the Ministry. Excluding two out of three of the Unforgivable Curses (we are told the Killing and Cruciatus curses need more than precise words and wand-waving to work, yet Harry can cast Imperio on his first try), school-aged kids can manage to replicate EVERY spell if they apply themselves and follow the rule-book.

Teenagers Fred and George have the means and capabilities of almost trapping Ron in an Unbreakable Vow. If kids can access such magic, HOW has no one in Hogwarts ever died from this?

The answer to this question is, obviously, that JKR refuses to use the "it's magic, don't have to explain shit" approach even when the story would benefit from it FAR more than it does from the "explain every little thing" approach. EVERYTHING needs a rule to exist in JKR's books, no matter how contrived.

So Unbreakable Vows need to be a thing for the exact duration of one book, thus they now exist in the Harry Potter world. They always have, even if we never hear them mentioned before or after. Look, Ron knows about them because he almost got trapped in one as a kid, there's your worldbuilding. It couldn't possibly be that two high-ranking Death Eaters know magic so obscure only they are able to make a blood pact in which one party dies if the contract isn't honored. It couldn't be that Narcissa, as a worried mother, wills that magic into existence, maybe in a once-in-a-lifetime moment, out of the love of her son (like Lily did btw). Nope, we need a presumably Ministry-catalogued Unbreakable Vow™ spell for the plot to work. Good thing this random-ass, school-aged boy Ron knows everything there is to know about it and explains it to the reader.

Another example that drives me insane is Prior Incantatem. When two wands of the same core from the same specimen duel, one may force the other to open its browser history. Come the fuck on. Not only is it stupid, not only is it ad-hoc and convenient, but JKR literally can't think of a SINGLE other reason why Harry can see loved ones' ghosts in a pivotal, climatic moment of the saga? It takes away every ounce of mysticism the story (ABOUT MAGIC) might have had!!!

Wanna talk about prophecies, which are recorded and catalogued? I guess it's your civic duty as a wizard to report to the Ministry any prophecy you happen to hear. Do you get fined if you don't? Or the sand to make Time Turners, which is all kept in a single room in the Ministry, because the incommensurable power of time is handled and managed by one department of the government.

Hell, the mystery of Deathly Hollows, the core of the saga's closure, is built on caveats. "Harry defeats Voldemort because uhhh... He did Expelliarmus on a completely different person that one time! Can't argue with the rules of dueling!". This is the best you can come up with. For the ending to your seven-book saga about wizards.

Happy about catchphrases, conversation topics, roomates and being able to interact more directly with Miis outside their apartment. I was sure they would find some sort of way to skirt around the issue of gay marriage and gender but they didn't, good.

Things I'm neutral about: island/item customization. I already have ACNH to scratch that itch so I probably won't be using it much, but it's nice to have the option.

Disappointed about Mii customization. Being able to draw directly on Miis is game-changing... but also useless if it turns out to be just unresponsive face paint without the ability to customize each feature like we could in Miitopia. What if I want to make non-human characters with different colored eyes and star-shaped pupils? Goddammit, what if I want to make wacky characters like Ed Edd n Eddy as Miis? I could do that in Miitopia... Idk. I hope there's more options that weren't shown in the direct, or that they add them before release.

Also... VERY worried about Nintendo's statement about sharing game content online. Removing Mii sharing is bad enough, but what the fuck do they mean when they ask us to "make sure content is in line with TOS before sharing on social media"? I hope this is limited to Switch-to-Socials direct posting, and not stuff like "Nintendo can have X can ban you for posting screenshots of your dick-themed island or Miis saying poo-poo caca."