cronically shaking n' crying

🐢 Watchful Eyes. 🐢

“I’m back!” 

Your voice calls through the quiet lair as you sling your bag onto the nearest chair and stretch out your back, arms over your head before you feel something click back into place and you let out a sigh of contentment.

“Hey bro!” Called Mikey as he wandered out of his room, phone in one hand and board in the other.

“Don’t you have a home to go to?” Chuckled Raph from where he was towelling off from using his bench. Shifting to sit up, he reached for the dumbbells and started on some arm curls.

“Yeah but the longer I’m here, the faster you’ll be getting that bike you wanted,” you shot back, flipping off the red masked turtle and causing him to laugh loudly. 

Grabbing your bag again, you head towards the room you use when staying in the lair.

You had finished college for the day, you had done your homework either before you left or on your phone while still on the subway. Gods bless technology, you think with a snort as you now drop your bag on the bed and reach for your overalls. While in college your focus was mechanical engineering, which was fifty-fifty between studying maths and physics in the classroom and time in the machine shop.

Toeing your soft converse off, you step into the overalls and tie the arms around your waist as you take a moment to pull off your long sleeve top. It’s always a long sleeve top. You don’t own anything with short sleeves so the skin from your wrists upwards is creamy pale from lack of sun. Well, almost all of it is creamy pale.

Pulling up the sleeves of the overall, nimble fingers quickly button up the front but you leave the top few buttons undone. The weather was turning warm and with the main engine block cleaned and put back together, you had a feeling fitting it back into the modified bike frame was going to get sweaty. Stepping into your steel-toed boots, you pause to lace them up before heading out to the garage.

“Hey, anyone seen Dee?” You ask as you move through the main living space of the lair.

Mikey was laid on the sofa with his phone while Raph hadn’t moved and was still counting under his breath. The orange masked turtle looked up and over at the computer station like he’d missed the sight of his brother hunched over the keyboards there.

“He might be in the garage?”

“Thanks Mikey, don’t strain yourself bruh,” you joke, patting his smooth dome on the way past and causing him to lazily flail an arm at you but he was already scrolling again.

Pushing open the small door next to the large roller doors, you can’t hear anything from inside. That doesn’t mean anything, you remind yourself with a smirk. That could mean Donnie has his headphones blasting while working on the wiring inside the Truck, or he’s hips deep underneath the truck but got distracted by something. Again.

Yeah, he really needed someone to keep an eye on him when working in the garage, you remind yourself as you head over to the large bike frame on its stand. It was how you had come to know the brothers, you’d both been salvaging in the same scrap yard although in your case you were doing it with permission whereas they had snuck in.

After turning a corner and bumping into Donnie, literally, you had blinked at each other before both smiling and offering a hand in greeting. You had a large butterfly valve in one hand that you needed for a pressure system at college while Donnie was casually holding a whole tire and rim in one hand like it was nothing. 

You had both started chatting like you were old friends bumping into each other in the supermarket, with the tech-turtle pointing out a fault on the seal of your valve that you had actually missed. In return you helped him locate another tire to match the one he was holding -you hadn’t been able to pick it up, but you’d been able to move it around and check for damages.

It was only after twenty minutes that Donnie’s brothers had appeared and asked what the hell was going on. You’d gotten a little embarrassed as you realised that while you had been happily scrap diving with someone and you hadn’t remembered to ask their name!

Leo and Raph had shared a smirk of amusement while Mikey had bounced forwards and shook your hand, babbling out the introductions and saying how glad he was to meet someone that didn’t care what they looked like. You had shrugged at that and said that this was New York, who cared what you looked like so long as you weren’t bothering anyone?

The rest had been history and now you were spending more time in the lair than you did at home. Your hands pause in their work as you try and push the memory of home away from your mind. Shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you turn your attention back to the wiring loom that needs to be clipped into place on the engine block or the various sensors and gadgets won’t work.

“Hey Y/N! I didn’t hear you come in.”

The voice of the tallest of the turtles instantly brings a smile to your face and a sense of peace to your heart. It wasn’t like there was only one reason you hadn’t been properly home in a while.

Looking up and over your shoulder, you see Donnie unfolding himself from the back of the modified garbage truck, laptop in one hand and a smile on his soft lips. At least he always looks happy to see me, you think warmly while your mind tries to bring back the sharp memories of home once more.

“Sorry Dee, I’ll admit I was a bit distracted thinking about getting this done,” you confess as you gesture to the large bundle of wires that is resting over your arms and one shoulder. “I was reviewing the layout diagram on the way over and wanted to get it done while it was fresh in my mind. Wanna come check my work? I think I’ve done something wrong but I’m lost as to where I cocked up.”

Golden amber eyes brighten again and Donnie closes his laptop without a moment’s hesitation, putting it down inside the truck before coming over. He’s taller than you of course, but since your not exactly a short man yourself, you find it quite nice. Looking up at him and hoping you weren’t starting to blush, you take a half step to the side to let Donnie lean down and get a good look at your work.

Seemingly without thinking about it, Donnie lifts a hand to stop you moving away any further, his arm hovering around your waist while the other hand moves to point at different plugs and connections. You hear him muttering under his breath as he looks and without thinking about it, you step closer again so your both shoulder to shoulder.

“Ah, you have made a slight mistake here,” Donnie says as he points at a matching pair of connectors with one finger. “These are actually supposed to go on the spark plugs, see the white connectors there? Do you mind if I help?”

Turning your head to answer him, it suddenly dawns on your at how close you both are. Your close enough to see the flecks of green and gold in his eyes, even with his glasses on, close enough to feel his breath on your cheek as they flush hotly. Unfortunately, your also close enough to not miss the slow smirk that grows on his face the longer that you are standing there, tongue-tied, one eye ridge raising in silent question.

“Ah! Er, yeah!” Jerking back slightly like someone just kicked you back into life, you swallow hard and clear your throat as you look at the engine. “Yeah i-if you could please? I-I mean, you helped design this thing after all.”

🐢🐢🐢🐢

“Donnie, time to get moving!”

Leo’s voice through the door of the garage snaps you both out of the comfortable bubble of work that you had slipped into. You had both gotten so engrossed in fitting the engine that neither of you had paid any mind to the time or that fact you were both suddenly hungry.

Unfortunately, the bad timing of the moment causes your grip to slip on with the large screwdriver in your hand. The screwdriver point scrapes across the skin of your forearm since your overalls had ridden up slightly while you had been busy tightening screws, drawing a hiss from your lips as you drop the screwdriver on reflex.

“Are you okay?” Donnie asks immediately, leaning over the bike from his side to see what you had done. He winces as he sees the thick gash on your arm, blood already starting to pool and run down the side. “Wait right there and I’ll-”

“No no, I got it!” You say hurriedly, resisting the temptation to cover it with your dirty hands or just as dirty overalls. 

Jumping to your feet, you back away towards the small sink Donnie had installed when converting the area for garage work. On the wall by the sink is a dual dispenser of liquid soap and paper towels, and in moments you slap one of the paper towels over the wound, frantically tugging down the sleeve of your overalls before putting pressure on the cut again.

“I’d feel more comfortable dressing it for you,” Donnie offers gently. 

His voice is right behind you and you spin on the spot to realise that he’d followed behind you, golden eyes full of concern. One large, three fingered hand is reaching out for your arm, even as his other hand comes up to rest on your shoulder. 

“Please?”

“No no, please Dee, I got this!” You repeat, twisting your body to keep your arm away from him while not wanting to push his hand off of your shoulder. “You should really get going before Leo comes looking for you. I’d feel worse if you got in trouble because of me.”

“My brother wouldn’t complain if I was patching you up.” Donnie’s soft lips flatten into a line of stubbornness as he frowns at you but you just frown right back.

“If you two are gonna kiss, can you get it over with?” Mikey’s voice from the doorway makes you both jump back from each other in surprise but as you glare over at him, you don’t see his trademark smile. He looks serious as he gestures over his shoulder, “Leo’s getting his panties in a twist cuz the Police Scanner just said there’s trouble up top.”

“See?” You manage, despite the trembling in your voice. “Now get going. I’ll probably still be here when you get back.”

Donnie looks down at you like he wants to argue, wants to say something, his golden eyes almost look like they are peering into your soul but finally he lets out a sigh and turns away. It’s all you can do to pull a smile onto your lips as you lift both hands up to wave him off, the one hand still holding a paper towel on your other arm.

Washing out the gash and reaching for the medical kit on the other side of the sink, you listen to the brothers in the main room as they quickly gear up and head on out with Leo shouting orders still even as they go. Your glad that they had left so quickly, because you didn’t want Donnie helping or seeing how well you could patch yourself up with one hand. Sighing in the quiet of the garage, you turn your arm over to tape the end of the bandage in place, you don’t miss the way the lights in the room almost shimmer on your scars.

It always surprised you how the body could heal. How it could make the new skin either darker than what was there before, or make it look silken and shiny instead, so it caught the light in a different way to your normal skin. No matter how much the scars had faded, the light could always pick them out.

Sighing again, you look back at the bike and decide to give it a rest for now. Your stomach is roiling with hunger but it won’t take long to tidy up the tools you had both been using. Donnie would appreciate that, you think with a soft smile for the turtle. He might live and work in an atmosphere of apparent chaos but there was order to it all, underneath the mess.

Trudging back to your room, you know you need to get changed before you can eat. The engine had leaked fluids down you when it had been tipped too far on the hoist and you had both bickered on who’s fault it was, even as you had rectified the problem and continued to manoeuvre it into place.

Arguing and discussing, bickering and fighting. That was another part of the fun, you thought, distracting yourself as you got changed into fresh clothes and dropped the rest into a cloth laundry bag. You had another four sets of overalls still. 

But even if you weren’t as smart as Donnie -and let’s face it, you probably never would be- you were still closer to his level than any of his brothers. The only other one that showed an interest in mechanic’s was Raph but he’d been warned off helping with the bike and told to keep his hands on the truck only. Both you and Raph had been surprised when Donnie had said that, but then the tech-turtle had dismissed it with the excuse of ‘making the bike as a present’. 

“If Mikey has his board, it’s only fair that I make the bike you’ve been wanting.” Donnie had shrugged, smiling bashfully at his brother. Raph had then proceeded to tease Donnie because they had had to take his  measurements and needed the red masked turtle’s help to cut and weld the frame for the bike.

Closing your door, you start to head towards the kitchen when Master Splinter appears from the dojo and calls to you. Changing direction and heading over, you can’t help but kneel before the rat like the brothers do, bringing your face closer. It was a habit you had picked up from them without even realising you were doing it, until Leo had pointed it out one day.

“While I will never turn you away child, is it not worth spending some time with your own family?” Splinter asked in a kind tone, dark eyes watching you closely. “I am coming to think of you as another son but surely they are missing you?”

Only when I duck fast enough, you think solemnly but you don’t say it aloud. Feeling the sadness creeping up and over your like a creature from the darkness of a nightmare, you nod and pull a smile onto your lips.

“Yes, you might have a point there Sir,” you say in a bright, brittle tone. “To be honest, I’ve been so engrossed in building that bike with Donatello that I have been letting it take over my focus.”

“You and my son are so similar,” nodded the rat with a soft smile, one hand coming up to absently stroke at his beard. “It is nice to see someone that can bring out the best in my shyest child.”

Now your smile is sincere and you know there’s a dusting of colour on your cheeks as you drop your gaze, not sure what you could say at this point that wouldn’t simply give away your affection for your friend.

“Unless there is another reason you are spending so much time here?” Master Splinter asks in a careful tone, and suddenly you can’t get out of there fast enough. 

Jumping to your feet and babbling apologies, unable to meet the chuckling old rat’s eye, you back away and head towards your room. You only stop once the door to your room is closed behind you and your standing in the quiet, panting slightly, face still on fire.

Taking a deep breath and holding it for a moment, you let it out slowly and start to grab whatever bits you might need. It wasn’t like you had intended to subtly move in with your friends like this. Part of you was mortified that it had gotten this bad, but the nicknacks in your room had mostly just been stuff that had filtered here from being at college and coming straight here so often. 

It doesn’t take long and as you head out of your room, bag on your shoulder, you give Splinter a wave on the way past. He calls a heartfelt “take care child” before settling himself down in Donnies chair, watching the various security cameras and listening to the police scanner. It was his routine whenever the brother’s went out for trouble instead of just a patrol and you had joined him a few times, on the nights when it seemed like everything was going wrong at once.

Heading towards the exit, you pull out your phone and send a text to the group chat. With that done, you go home.

🐢🐢🐢🐢

An hour.

It doesn’t take long.

An hour and you are climbing out of the window of the room you share with your brother.

Moving as quietly as you can, trying not to sniffle even as the tears keep falling, you head up to the roof. It’s already dark and you know your roof isn’t on the brothers patrol pattern tonight, so you tell yourself there’s nothing to worry about.

In your mind, you can still hear the shouting from your family even up here.

There was a spot you had found years ago, between two AC units that kept the worst of the wind off but wasn’t much use against the rain. Nestling down there and tucking your legs up, you finally let the tears out but in your mind you can hear your father, his voice full of venom as he hisses insults at you.

“What are you crying for? Real men don’t cry! What am I talking about? Little fucking boy lover like you, why would you care what other people think about you? Disgusting little shit couldn’t even pretend for the sake of your family!”

When it wasn’t him, it was the words of your mother. She never shouted at you, but she did always sound tired and disappointed no matter what you did. She would just sigh and say again how disappointed she was that you weren’t becoming a doctor or a lawyer like your brothers. A job of real worth -to her mind- involved sitting behind a desk, not working with your hands.

Your brothers were no help, merely looking grateful that you were taking the brunt of their parents' attitudes and not them for once. It had only gotten worse when your eldest brother had moved out last year, and it was set to get worse when your other brother moved out in a few months time.

As the tears started to dry out, you fished out the small bag you had brought out with you. There was a little packet of pocket tissues in there, amongst a few other items, and you wiped at your face and blew your nose. Shifting so your legs were crossed in front of you, you look at the other contents of the bag, one hand idly pushing up the sleeves of your loose fitting shirt.

In the light of the moon, shining down on the city and trying to rival mankind’s own brightness as it hung there, you once again see the patterns of scars.

It wasn’t an often enough habit to have been noticed by anyone, despite the fact you had been doing it for years now. There were times when you would start to get too carried away and you would look for other coping methods while your arms healed and your scars faded.

Sometimes it was enough to look at the scars, remember the pain of the blade on your skin and you wouldn’t add to their number. But nights like this? The temptation was strong.

“Don’t? Please?”

The voice makes you freeze up, eyes wide in shock and lungs frozen. Finally, you let out a shaky breath and lean back from the small bag in front of you, the sharpened pen knife open on top of it. Inside the bag still are several different bandages and some alcohol cleaning wipes.

Swallowing hard but still not looking up, you blink away the tears as you start to speak.

“Donatello. To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“I came to check on a friend?”

“Really now?” You manage, sniffling and absently reaching for a nearly-clean tissue to wipe your nose. “Why would you do that?”

“Because I know.”

Listening carefully now, you hear his large footsteps get closer before he sits down in front of you. He’s close enough that you can see his feet in their modified boots, and his legs, folded up like yours with his hands resting on his knees.

You don’t even want to ask what it is he ‘knows’ because any of it is too painful to try and talk about. So instead you wait. Surely he wouldn’t be patient enough to sit here all night with you, part of your mind murmurs. He’s always busy, always doing something, although… that never stops him from making time for his brothers or you. Never stops him from just hanging out and watching a movie or goofing off and playing a game.

“I know about your arms,” Donnie says after nearly ten minutes of sitting together in silence. “I accidentally saw them once when you fell asleep on me, when we were watching movies with Mikey? His Marvel phase when he insisted we watch all of them in release order.”

You can’t help the faint snort of a laugh as you do remember those weeks. It had only been everyone putting their foot down together, that Mikey hadn’t had them all watching the movies back to back everyday. Leo and Donnie had worked out a schedule that would involve no more than two movies in a single day and with the rule that Mikey couldn’t insist that everyone had to watch. 

They had though, for the most part. And you had used it as an excuse to cuddle up next to your tall friend, leaning against him and enjoying the comfort that came with such contact.

“I didn’t see any fresh marks and… even now I can’t see anything fresh. Except for your accident earlier.”

Your eyes stray to the bandage still on your forearm. It felt like yesterday that you had done that. Why did being around your family have to be so hard? Why were they so cruel? So thoughtless in their words and actions towards you?

Donnie continued to talk, even as you said nothing and refused to look at him. It wasn’t like this was something you were proud of, something you could talk about like it was nothing or like it was dismissable. You might have been doing this like a dirty little secret but you had done your best to try and keep it under control!

“I saw the marks and I wondered why but I never wanted to ask or pry, in case that part of your life was over with. If it was, then I knew that you would probably tell me in time or when you are ready. I know a lot about having to wait for the right time to be able to do something. I had to wait years just to be able to sit on a rooftop in the moonlight, and now I get to do this with my best friend… it was worth waiting for.”

Despite yourself, you nod in agreement.

“When I was moving you and spotted the marks, I will confess that I might have invaded your privacy just a little.” Donnie continued, clearing his throat nervously for a moment. His words came out slowly before starting to spill out in a rush. 

“I… I might have looked over both arms and… and glanced under your shirt. I’m sorry! I mean, if you had been a woman then I never would have dreamed of doing it. And I don’t mean to dismiss the fact because your a man, I mean, you have just as much right to body privacy as women do! I didn’t mean to perv on you or anything like that, I just wanted to check if you had any more scars or any fresh cuts on your torso. Oftentimes, people move location if a site is starting to look too noticeable. I mean… I’ll stop talking.”

As the flood of words had spilled out, you had finally shifted your gaze upwards to meet his eyes.

Donnie looked a bit worse for wear, with some obvious scrapes and bruises blossoming on his arms. There was also a mark on his cheek that looked like someone had managed to punch him in the face too. But you only took in these details at a glance, because what really held your focus was his eyes. 

He had always had such enchanting eyes, you think with a lovelorn sigh. Sure, Leo’s crystal blue eyes always made you feel like he could read the lies on the inside of your skull, and Raph always looked like he was hoping for a fight, and Mikey seemed to be enjoying a joke at the expense of the whole world! But Donnie’s eyes… There was something about them that made you want to just keep on looking. It can’t have been the way he looked at you, because he looked at you the same way that he looked at a motherboard for a computer, or the bike’s engine when it was in pieces being cleaned.

Donnie cleared his throat again and gestured vaguely towards the fire escape, “I came to visit you and ask if you wanted to sneak back into the lair. But when I heard all the shouting and… and what they were shouting, it was the last bits of the puzzle. I kind of figured it out.”

You nod again as your gaze slowly drops. At least, you try to drop your gaze but there is a finger on your jaw, lifting your head up again and making your heart race. As your eyes meet Donnie’s again, he licks his lips nervously.

“I don’t want to be pushing my boundaries here but is the… situation downstairs the only reason you started coming to see us?”

You gently shake your head, not trusting your voice to work just yet.

“Guessing part of it was the novelty of knowing a family of mutants living in the sewers of New York City?” He joked and once again you can’t help the chuckle that slips from your lips, making Donnie smile gently at you. “See? I was right again. But…  will I be right about the third question. Was there another reason you came down to the lair?”

Your eyes widen in surprise as Donnie leans closer to you, bracing himself on his spare hand. He stops a few inches away but you don’t fight it, you don’t pull away or try to cover your blushes. Your lips part slightly as he tilts his head and smiles slowly.

“You see, Y/N, being a good scientist is about observation,” Donnie says, his voice dropping a few octaves as he speaks and suddenly all thoughts of blades are fleeing as your heart rate picks up. “And I have been observing you very closely for some time now. And I feel the need to say that, not only do I enjoy the act of watching you, I like what I see. And I am rarely ever wrong in my conclusions.”

Then Donnie pulled back slightly, letting go of your chin as he looked down at the pen knife and little bag. With quick and nimble hands, he tucks the knife back into the bag and zips it closed, moving it to the side before looking back at you. You had leant back in surprise when he moved but as you saw him touching the bag, your mind was flooded with shame and again your eyes are on your lap, on your scars.

Two hands reach forwards and take yours, lifting them up and taking your gaze with them. Donnie brought your hands to his lips, pressing a kiss to your knuckles before simply looking at you.

“Please tell me I’m not wrong?” Donnie whispers at you while your mind stutters to a stop.

Your bottom lip trembles and you try to form the words, to push yourself to speak in some way but nothing comes out for a moment. Finally, all you can do is shake your head and lean closer, pulling on Donnie’s hands and making him move in until you are resting your foreheads against each other.

“Your not wrong,” you croak out after it feels like eternity.

“Really?!” 

Donnie flushes and mumbles an apology for his sudden outburst, making you chuckle and bravely lean forwards to press a chased kiss to his cheek. Golden eyes widen in surprise and now it seems like it's Donnie’s turn to sit there in shock, making you chuckle again.

“Look… I’m sorry you… you had to see this,” you manage at last, finding your voice while not letting go of his hands in yours. “I don’t actually do it that often but sometimes are more… stressful than others. I try to keep it under control but living at home? It’s killing me.”

You pause as you wait to see if Donnie is going to say anything but he is just watching you calmly, letting you speak.

“I didn't realise how often I was at the lair until a few weeks ago,” you admit sheepishly. “I know it was wrong but between being around you and working on the bike, I could almost forget the fucked up family problems I was running away from. When I’m back here, I’m just a disappointment to them all. When I’m at the lair with you and your family, I feel included and cared for.”

“You really do like being around me?”

“Yes Mr Scientist,” you tease, laughing quietly. “I thought you had been observing me? Or was that just a really good pick-up line?”

“Both?” 

And you can hear the hopeful tone in his voice, making you laugh again.

“How about we take this one step at a time, while we finish that bike?” You offer with a smooth smirk, shifting closer still. “I’ll let you plan the first date, since you made the first move?”

“Alright but your coming back to the lair with me tonight.”

“Oh? You going to sweep me up Princess style?” You joke but the look of inspiration on the tech-turtles face makes you wonder if you would regret those words. “Oi! Don’t you dare!”

Donnie just chuckles and nuzzles at your cheek for a moment, “just promise me something okay?”

“What?”

“No matter what happens between us, you’ll come to me before you reach for a blade again?”

“I’ll try to.”

“Hey.”

“What? Asking for help is hard… I’ve never had anyone else that-that I could ever…” Your words trail off as you drop your gaze again and let out a sigh before looking up at Donnie again and smiling.

“I’m sorry. I will.”

“Now I want you to promise me you’ll not apologise about this again,” Donnie added gently, tugging on your hands in his grip still. “This is not something to apologise about. It happened, we accept it and we try to move forwards.”

“T-together?”

“Together.”

🐢🐢🐢🐢

It only took two weeks before the brothers caught on that something was finally happening between you both. But it wasn’t you two getting caught kissing or anyone reading the painfully embarrassing texts you had started sending each other.

No, you had rolled up your sleeves while doing the washing up at the kitchen sink. Leo had walked in and spotted it, catching your eye before giving you one of those slow smiles he did when he was truly happy about something.

“Glad to see you have both stopped beating around the bush.”

That caused Mikey to look up from where he’d been putting away leftovers, his blue eyes taking in the details but it was only after some kind of silent signalling behind your back that the youngest brother caught up.

“Ohhh! Wait? Really? Woah, that’s awesome!”

“Way to keep up there Mikey,” chuckled Leo as he left the room.

Mikey stuck his tongue out at Leo’s back before stepping up and starting to dry the plates on the draining board. After a few minutes, he asked -as casually as Mikey can ask anything- if you had ever thought of having any tattoo’s on your arms.

“It's up to you but I’d be happy to design them if you want, and Dee still has his tattoo gun.”

You look down at the scars on your forearms and shrug, even as you lift a plate out and place it on the rack. “Maybe one day.”

“Your call bro, it's not like you have anything to be ashamed of.”

With a smile, you know he’s right.

一→ | leonardo hamato | ←一

its you by @ashbub

〈rottmnt, fluff, young!leo, oneshot〉

super duper cute, loved seeing a young reckless leo hehe <3 ash has amazing fics for donnie too

chair-ry on top by @marwhoa

〈rottmnt, fluff, oneshot〉

cutesy meet, despite the monster hehe, leo and his puns, go read all of marlowe’s stuff, rn

the key to my heart by @navithescribe

〈rottmnt, fluff, multi〉

smitten leo teehee, he’s hooked from chapter one

so shell feed by @pxrtalchopped

〈rottmnt, fluff, crack, multi〉

one of the first rise!leo fics i ever read, super fun <3

quick sketch by @landsel

〈rottmnt, nsfw 18+, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, multi〉

eeeeeeee, the feels, im in loveeee, the writinggg, the art, the storyyyyy mwah mwah <3

like father, like son by @eternalglitch

〈rottmnt, angst, multi〉

gonna be completely honest, i couldn’t read past chapter ten-ish but maybe one day my fragile heart will toughen up to finish, honestly a staple rottmnt fic, the writing is devastatingly beautiful <3

little blue hearts by @thelaundrybitch

〈bayverse, 18+, fluff, angst, multi〉

i rlly like the trust building it makes the story so much more realistic, & how relatable/funny all the characters are hehehe, go check out her other works too!! <3

一→ | donatello hamato | ←一

donnie has little mercy on the injured by @dancingdonatello / @pikoit

『rottmnt, fluff, hurt/comfort, oneshot』

loved this, donnie’s nice but yk he has a bad boy persona hehe, they have plenty more oneshots too, go read them alllllll

in my head, we belong by @dancingdonatello / @pikoit

『rottmnt, angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, multi』

my heart strings were tugged plenty of times throughout this one, and yes it is completed!

crush too much by @afreakingdork

『rottmnt, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, multi』

oml no words, just go read, you won’t be disappointed, love love love this <3

weird city, weirder neighbors by @in-a-black0ut

『rottmnt, fluff, multi』

super fun, donnie my guy, what a greeting heheheh <3

cool for the summer by @stormywritestuff

『rottmnt, nsfw 18+, fluff, angst, multi』

so so detailed and intricate, love the relationship building, feels so lifelike in the best gritty way possible <3 also i couldn’t find the original post on ash’s tumblr so i went with landsel’s post hehe <3

perfectionists by @rheawritesforfun

『rottmnt, nsfw 18+, fluff, oneshot』

loved. that. sm. rhea has plenty more awesome works for the our beloved turtles, go!!! run!!!! <3

baskè-ball by @thegreat-aristurtle

『rottmnt, fluff, oneshot』

another rottmnt staple in my opinion, like if you haven’t read this yet run run run, beautiful writing <3

hold on by @dunk-on-em-ao3

『rottmnt, sibling angst, hurt/comfort, oneshot』

wahhhhhhh donnie my sweet soft shell turtle, this one rlly hit hard, the differences between donnie and his brothers & feelings that come with being ‘different’ lovely read <3

alpha stage by @snailsnaps

『rottmnt, sibling fluff/angst, multi』

this idea is so so neat and cute, I think the consequences here are the most intriguing, hehe link leads to their masterlist!! <3

softie by @rising-shellshock

『rottmnt, fluff, oneshot』

oh my lord this was so adorable, my heart stuttered a couple of times because i could just feeeeeel the love, pouring out of both donnie & reader, super duper cute <333

like you by @msbarrybeeson

『rottmnt, fluff, angst』

this was one of the first donnie x reader fics i ever read, and it took til now to find it again !!!! another rottmnt staple, the dialogue is just perfect, it’s like I can hear their voices, check out part two!! <33

一→ | raphael hamato | ←一

the red king and his crimson heart by @b00tyshakerr9000

〔rottmnt, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, multi〕

sooo sweet, raph’s a big softie, jay also has another multi fic for donnie <3 check out their stuff

first sight by @yn-hamato

〔rottmnt, fluff, angst, oneshot〕

definitely a cute meet, idc about the circumstances hehehe, tess has more amazing fics too check ‘em out <3

teensy-weensy hiccup, oops by @marwhoa

〔2k12, fluff, oneshot〕

ahhhhh i just love a little jealous raph hehe, again go check out marlowe’s stuff !!!! the bestest !!! <3

ego boost by @raphsgrl

〔bayverse, nsfw 18+, fluff, oneshot〕

so they didn’t rlly have a title so i just made one up >.< i hope that’s okay, just for labeling purposes hehe <333 on another note xD woof!! raph is a hottie right here <3

一→ | michelangelo hamato | ←一

golden hour by @b00tyshakerr9000

{rottmnt, angst, hurt/comfort, oneshot}

wahhhhhhhh my heartttttt T^T~~~~~ such a good read!!! <3

to fill a hole by @ray-jaykub

｛bayverse, nsfw 18+, fluff, oneshot｝

mikey is just so flippin cute, reunions are the best ;D heheheh <3

holding out for a hero by @sharpwindow

{bayverse, nsfw 18+, fluff, oneshot}

1.

Mikey: Am I in trouble?

Leo: Take a guess.

Mikey: No?

Leo: Take another guess.

2.

Leo: I think we're missing something.

Raph: Teamwork?

Donnie: Cohesion?

Mikey: A general sense of what we’re doing?

3.

Donnie: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste.

Raph: We got spring water.

Donnie: NO.

Mikey: With EXTRA minerals.

Leo: It’s like licking a stalagmite.

Donnie: DON'T COME HOME.

Mikey: Mmmmm cave water.

4.

Leo: Someone is gonna die.

Mikey: From fun!

5.

[The group is in a prison cell that was just hit by an earthquake]

Leo: Uh, I'm gonna roll a perception check of... 4, and see if our cell is, uh, in any way damaged by this quake.

Raph: You're in a prison cell.

Donnie: You did great. Well, I got a 10-

Raph: You're in a prison cell with bars on it.

Mikey: I got a 1!

Raph: You're in... a cube-shaped place.

6.

Casey: Would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?

Leo: Nope, absolutely not.

Mikey: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.

Raph: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.

Donnie: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you.

Raph: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.

Casey: I’m leaving.

7.

Mikey: Whaddya call a fish with no eye?

Donnie, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons.

Mikey:

Mikey: fsh

8.

Mikey: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.

Raph: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.

9.

Raph: You often use humor to deflect trauma

Mikey: Thank you.

Raph: I didn't say that was a good thing.

Mikey: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny-

10.

Donnie: I made coffee.

Leo: I don’t want coffee.

Donnie: I did not make coffee for you. This is my coffee.

Leo: Then why are you telling me?

Donnie: It’s a conversation starter.

Leo: That’s a stupid conversation starter.

Donnie: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.

11.

Mikey: Are you an ‘arr’ pirate, or a ‘yo ho ho’ pirate?

Raph: I’m a ‘I’m not paying $600 for photoshop’ pirate.

12.

Raph: Am I going too far?

Donnie: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.

13.

Casey: How do I deal with my enemies?

Raph: Kill them

Casey: That's a bit extreme, I was hoping for a more passive solution

Mikey: Kill them only a little?

14.

Casey, holding a bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume?

Mikey: -chugs entire bottle-

Mikey: It’s perfume.

15.

[Donnie helping Leo out after he got injured, while the others are watching]

Mikey: How does he look?

Raph: A little better than you, actually.

bonus, my oc added in (you can skip this)

1.

Mikey: Hey, Donnie? Can I get some dating advice?

Donnie: Just because I’m with Lucy doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

2.

Lucy: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.

Leo: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Lucy: Yes!

Raph: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

3.

Mikey: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it

Leo: Mikey no.

Lucy: Mistlefoe.

Leo: Please stop encouraging him.

4.

Lucy: It’s dark in here.

Mikey: Don’t worry dude, I got this.

Mikey: -Stomps his feet-

Mikey: -Skechers light up-

5.

Raph: Why’re you wearing that.

Lucy, wearing a giant hoodie: I don’t know, why’re you fucking ugly?

Raph: You’re a bitch.

6.

Lucy, walking up to Raph:

Raph: What.

Lucy: You’re emo.

Raph: Can you like, fuck off-

7.

Lucy: So apparently the 'bad vibes' I’ve been feeling are actually severe psychological distress.

Donnie: See, I could’ve told you that but you don’t listen.

8.

Lucy: -standing at the entrance of the lab with a spatula-

Donnie: What?

Lucy, staring blankly: Do you like pancakes.

Donnie: No, I like waffles-

Lucy: How many pancakes do I need to make to feed five of us.

Donnie, also staring blankly:

…

1.

Donnie: Can I be frank with you guys?

Raph: I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help.

Leo: Can I still be leo ?

Mikey: Shhh, let Frank speak.

2.

Donnie: How did none of you hear what I just said?

Leo: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.

Mikey: I got distracted about halfway through.

Raph: Ignoring you was a conscious decision..

3.

Raph: God, give me patience.

Mikey: I think you mean 'give me strength'.

Raph: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.

4.

Leo: Looking left cause you don’t treat me right.

Raph: Looking right because you left.

Mikey: Looking up cause you let me down.

Donnie: Looking down cause you fucked up.

Casey: What is wrong with you guys.

5.

April: Is having a dick fun?

Raph: It has its ups and downs.

Mikey: Sometimes it’s a little hard.

Donnie: It’s a pain in the ass.

Leo: Oh, Jesus, fuck, guys, come on.

6.

Leo, trying to convince Casey to join the group: You know... I thought it'd be good to have someone come along who's really... “strong”!

Raph: And ugly!

Mikey: And grumpy!

Donnie: And oblivious to reality!

Casey: … alright.

7.

Mikey: If Donnie and I were drowning, who would you save?

Raph: You two can’t swim?

Donnie: It’s a hypothetical question, Raph! who would you save?

Raph: My time and effort.

8. (Definitely my favorite HAHA)

Donnie: We need to get through this locked door. Casey, give me your credit card.

Casey: Here.

Donnie, pocketing it: Thanks. Raph, kick down the door.

9.

Leo: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.

Mikey: The cow???

Leo: What?

Raph: Mikey, W H A T ?

10.

Leo: Tell Mikey about the birds and the bees.

Donnie: They're disappearing at an alarming rate.

11.

Mikey: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.

Leo: Wasn't Donnie with you?

Donnie: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

12.

Leo: Donnie, keep an eye on Mikey today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.

Donnie: Sure, I’d love to see Mikey get punched.

Leo: Try again.

Donnie, sighing: I will stop Mikey from getting punched.

13.

Mikey: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death?

Donnie: How am I supposed to know?

Raph: You say, as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult.

Donnie: -sighs-

Donnie: You wouldn't be trapped, Mikey.

14.

Raph: Hey Donnie,

Donnie: Mhm?

Raph: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on?

Donnie:

Donnie: Where’s Mikey?

15.

Mikey: Donnie, what do IDK, LY, and TTYL mean?

Donnie: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later

Mikey: Ok, I love you too, I’ll just ask Raph.

16.

Donnie: If you had to choose between Mikey and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?

Raph: That depends, how much money are we taking about?

Mikey: Raph!

Donnie: 63 cents.

Raph: I'll take the money.

Mikey: RAPH!!!

bonus, my oc with the boys/donnie. (you obviously don’t have to read these if you don’t want to)

1.

Lucy: Donnie…

Donnie: Oh boy, 'donnie' in b-flat.

Donnie: You're disappointed.

2.

Lucy: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?

Donnie: Have everyone stand.

Mikey: Bring three more chairs!

Leo: The most important ones can sit down.

Raph: Kill three.

3.

Lucy: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?

Donnie: Several traffic violations.

Raph: Three counts of resisting arrest.

Mikey: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

Leo: Also, that’s not our car.

4.

Lucy: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives.

Donnie: I wake up at 3:00 pm.

Lucy:

Lucy: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives.

5.

Lucy: Okay, truth or dare?

Donnie: Truth.

Lucy: How many hours have you slept this week?

Donnie:

Donnie: ...Dare.

Lucy: Go to bed.

Donnie: I don’t like this game.

6.

Donnie: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE?

Lucy: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially

Donnie, desperately, as Lucy bleeds out: I KNOW THAT! I MEAN YOUR BLOOD TYPE

Lucy: Oh! B positive.

Donnie, on the verge of tears: IM TRYING!

7.

[Lucy, texting Donnie at four in morning]

Lucy: What if the 'g' in 'gif' is silent?

Donnie: Go to sleep.

Lucy: What gif I don't want to?

Donnie: Fuck you.

8.

Donnie: I trust Lucy.

Leo: You think she know what she’s doing?

Donnie: I wouldn't go that far-

9.

Lucy: So, what, now I’m just supposed to do anything that Mikey does? I mean, what if he jumped off a cliff?

Donnie: If Mikey were to jump off a cliff, he would’ve done his due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Mikey jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Lucy: You jump off a cliff!

Donnie: Gladly. Provided Mikey did first.

10. (My personal favorite again HAHA)

Lucy, in a high voice, holding barbie: Hey ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!

Donnie, in a deep voice, holding ken: Nonsense, barbie. You’re staying home and having my kids.

Leo: What the fuck are you guys doing?