Bridging the gap, showing kindness, leading with love. Sounds easy, right? Sure, but I think for a lot of people now it IS VERY DIFFICULT to do, myself included.
But if we stop even trying to make an effort, then we'll never bridge the gap. If we give up hope that at least some people have opinions built from ignorance and slanted teachings rather than an innate hatred, then we will never heal.
There are MOST DEFINITELY those that fit the "born evil" label, but we can't just say "You're just no good for me" and lock the door forever for EVERYONE. That's when you really become a separate country.
I REALLY wish I had a better example because I don't want to compare people to dogs or downplay the issue but I'm a dog person and I keep thinking of a video I saw of a rescued shelter dog. Someone had come to try to save them, give them a chance at some life other than being alone in a cage and eventually put down.
They were WILD and cornered - snapping, snarling, lunging. They let loose their bowels - they were THAT afraid.
The person managed to wrap them in a towel and the dog was still fighting - fighting for their life.
Can we blame the dog? How are they to know this person will be any better than the many others who hurt them, who let them down, who added yet another multiplier to their history of pain?
To them this person is promising them something their life experience has taught them is impossible, so Yes, they are scared and it's fight or flight.
The person held them until they settled, and the video progressed to show the same dog returning to more familiar affectionate dog behavior. Of course this is a story shown through rose-colored glasses.
Could the rescue dog snap one day and attack their rescuer no matter how much unconditional love they've received? Yes, that's a possibility. Sadly I personally know instances where that has happened.
The dog will need to be monitored and helped for the remainder of their life. Their rescuer must also live knowing that things could go sideways. That's the scar of abuse. There is no 100% healing, only the best you can manage, hopefully with help.
The fact is, a large number of American citizens have been abused. Americans have been abused for a long, long, time. Many of them didn't even realize it until later in their lives - I think of another story of a man who only knew shampoo because his family couldn't afford soap - normal is based on what we see. Then, at a critical boiling point the heat was turned up instead of down, the lid sealed, and the pressure grew.
Maybe the damage is too deep, maybe there isn't therapy for our fractured citizens. Even so, will never reach a better point without even the slightest change. Educate. Remediate. Make things better for our children and their children. Give them a path to a world better than the one we know while instilling them with our wisdom so they don't repeat our mistakes.
Still, this is hope, and hope takes a whole hell of a lot of work to cultivate and grow these days. Failure rate is high. But zero effort will guarantee zero reward, even if it also guarantees zero disappointment.
I'm exhausted and I'm hurt, but I refuse to zero out.
Only education and actual free thought decisions will truly free people from their bubbles, and someone needs to be there to help them break free.
We can't all live in our safe echo chamber 100% of the time and hope to grow or learn. Let's shoot for maybe 99.99% and go from there? Get outside our boxes, even if that literally only means pulling yourself out of bed or looking out a real window.
Just the slightest change of direction makes a huge impact over time.
Reach out. I know it's difficult, especially if you have other mental demons like me, I know it can be terrifying. I can't promise you won't get bitten. I can't promise that it'll get less scary when you do. I don't know if eventually you'll be desensitized or if it'll keep getting more difficult.
All I really know is many of us are stuck in a hole that most people cannot climb out of on their own, and there will be no rescue without a meeting of outstretched hands.
